A/N: So, this is my second JokerxHarley! This is another plotbunny I randomly came up with; it might be my last JokerxHarley for a while, at least until I can come up with another idea. XD. Joker and Harley aren't really from any universe in particular (I say this because I see fics that are like, "Nolanverse JokerxHarley" and stuff like that), I just made this up off the top of my head. Enjoy! :D


Revving Up His Harley



The Joker stormed into the room, slamming the door behind him. Harley looked up, startled by his crashing entrance. What could be wrong with him?

"Mistah J," she said, getting up and going over to him. "What's wrong, Puddin'?"

She got no answer except for him roughly shoving her aside as he stormed past her. "Mistah J," she repeated, following him, "what's wrong?"

She saw his fists clench, and he suddenly whirled around to face him. "It's that damned Batman," he snarled. "Batman and his idiotic Robin! They're always besting me, always!"

"Well, why didn't you take me with you, Puddin'?" Harley asked before she could stop herself. Questioning her Joker was the wrong thing to do, especially when he was angry... "I could've helped fight them!"

"I didn't want you there for a reason, Harley!" the Joker responded angrily. "I wanted to act alone tonight; do you have a problem with it?"

Before Harley had an opportunity to answer, her Joker slapped her in the face. She recoiled, moving backwards a couple of steps, her cheek on fire. "No, Puddin'," she said, a hand on her cheek. "I'm sorry."

"You'd better be." The Joker turned away, allowing Harley to approach him again. She reached out cautiously, gently placing a hand on his shoulder. She wanted to comfort him... wanted to calm him down... but she wasn't sure how.

"Do you want to blow something up?" she asked, trying whatever solutions popped up in her head. "Terrorize some citizens? Go on a killing spree?"

"No, I don't," the Joker answered rather rudely, shrugging her hand off and beginning to pace impatiently. Harley watched him, trying to think of something else to suggest. What else could she say to calm her beloved Joker down? He didn't want to do anything from the normal routine... which she found rather strange. He always wanted to do something from the normal routine... which meant that something was really wrong with him. But how to fix it...?

Joker suddenly turned around, grabbed Harley's wrist, and pulled her into a dark bedroom. The only light in the room was coming in from the living room, but once he closed the door, the room turned pitch black.

Harley was suddenly pulled and trapped against her Joker's body, and his hot breath tickled her throat.

"You always do what Daddy tells you to do, don't you?" his voice muttered heatedly into her ear.

"Yes, Mistah J," Harley replied, wondering what on earth he wanted.

"Then... Daddy needs a ride. He needs to rev up his little Harley. Now."

Harley's eyes widened with unexpected delight as he quickly pulled her costume off, throwing it to the ground. The Joker then picked her up and placed her on the massive bed, stripping out of his clothes after he'd done so. As he climbed onto the bed, he trapped her wrists above her head and roughly locked his lips with hers.

Her eyes fluttered closed at this, at the bliss that filled her mind. She loved this... and only partly noticed one of his hands working at her bra and panties, pulling them off and throwing them to the ground. He then laid fully on top of her, his arms around her.

Harley's mind was whirling already. They hadn't done any of this for so long, she'd almost forgotten how good the feeling of skin on skin was. The Joker's kiss deepened, and she wrapped her arms around him as his tongue snaked inside her mouth, exploring the dark, warm cavern. Her body filled with warmth, and pleasure filled her mind. This was amazing... peaceful...

She suddenly let out a gasp as she felt her Joker inside her. He'd moved his lips from hers, instead kissing down her front and back up. She freed a hand and pulled his head back up, colliding her lips with his as his hips worked against hers.

Each thrust the Joker gave sent a wave of pleasure through her, leaving Harley wanting more and more as each second passed. They hadn't done this in so long... she'd almost forgotten how wonderful it was, how passionate it felt... it was amazing.

"Mistah J," she breathed as the Joker increased his speed, tearing her lips away from his. He grabbed her free wrist and trapped it again, and she tilted her head back as he roughly kissed the pale skin of her throat. Harley let out a moan as his teeth nipped at her throat, and his thrusts increased even more in speed. Her eyes fluttered closed, and she felt she could keep going forever... until her world shattered to pieces. Pleasure filled her, its strongest yet, and she moaned loudly as her energy was sapped from her.

A minute later, the Joker had reached his own climax, and he collapsed on top of Harley. The pair laid on the bed, still together, gasping for breath. Harley was exhausted... All she wanted to do now was curl up with her Joker and fall asleep. Her eyes fluttered closed as she prepared to do just that...

...when suddenly, her peace was disrupted as the Joker untangled himself from her and climbed out of the bed. Harley's eyes flew open, and she sat up and watched questioningly as he started quickly pulling his clothes back on.

"Somethin' wrong, Mistah J?" she asked, tilting her head to the side as she watched him. The Joker didn't respond except to pick up Harley's clothes from the ground and toss them to her. The accompanying look he gave her was a silent order to get reclothed immediately.

"Don't want any of my boys to see you like this," he finally muttered. "They're supposed to be turning up soon."

Harley sighed, defeated, and began to put her clothes back on. She didn't really like the men her Joker always recruited for his little crime sprees... They all would stare at her, and she could tell they were mentally lusting after her. They knew better than to touch her, however; they knew Harley Quinn was the boss's girl, and the boss's alone.

A few minutes later, right after she'd put her jester's hat on, the Joker grabbed her wrist and pulled her out of the little bedroom into the large living room. An insistant knock at the front door was sounding, and the Joker shoved Harley onto the couch before going to answer it. As he opened the door and began to invite his men in, Harley sighed and put her chin in her hands, sitting on the couch and pouting. Of course her dear Mistah J had to do it before they showed up. Somehow it had always managed to be cut short on those days. It had to be a day where she wanted to lay there and literally sleep with him, didn't it?

"Hey, Harley," one of the men greeted, sitting on the couch next to her. He was a tall, burly man; nothing like her Puddin'. She waved to him halfheartedly, for she was too busy staring off into space and in her own little world to really hear him.

Footsteps came towards her, and suddenly a dark shadow loomed over her, startling her from her reverie. She looked up to see the Joker standing in front of her, an angry look on his face: his eyes were narrowed, and he was looking down at her demeaningly. He suddenly grabbed her nose and pulled her to her feet, dragging her back to the bedroom.

"Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow," she muttered with each step they took. His grip on her was so hard that her nose was aching, and her eyes were screwed shut with the pain. Once they were in the bedroom, the Joker slammed the door, and he wrapped his arms around her and clutched her to his body.

"What're you pouting for?" he murmured into her ear, his voice quiet with anger. "Didn't get enough satisfaction, my little harlequin?"

Harley had a retort ready to say, but she bit it back, knowing that if she gave voice to her thoughts, he'd get even angrier... and she didn't really want that right now.

"I asked you a question," the Joker growled. "Answer me."

"Y-Yes," Harley managed to stutter, her heart fluttering anxiously. "I was satisfied enough."

"Good," he replied. "Now... Daddy's going out again. Can Daddy's little baby behave until he gets back?"

"Where're ya goin'?" the woman asked, relieved that he hadn't struck her... yet.

"Just going to stir up a little trouble in Gotham with my boys," the Joker replied, still clamping her in his tight hold. "I'll be back. Will you behave while I'm gone, baby?"

"Yes, Daddy," Harley answered helplessly; she knew she couldn't object even if she wanted to. She sensed his lips curving upward in a smile, and he finally let go of her.

"Thanks for the ride, my Harley," he said. He gave her a quick peck on the lips, then disappeared out of the room.

Harley knew she ought to feel a bit disappointed that he hadn't given her more than that peck before he left, but she grinned as she sat on the bed, picking up a pillow and hugging it to her chest. She was so hopelessly in love with that psychopathic clown... but it was so much fun. She knew the Joker loved revving up his Harley from time to time, and God knew she loved it, too. She'd always love that crazy Joker... he was hers and hers alone.