Super short one shot. I just got super inspired (inspiring day, eh?) and wrote like crazy. This takes place after Booth's fake death...but I imagined what would happen if Booth really died. This is if he really died....:( hope you like it.

-Lacey

She hated this place. She hated it with an intense passion. It so happened that every time she set foot there, she burst into tears. She tried to control them but some things you can't control.

She looked at the headstone. She never wanted to look at it again. Each time she came here she swore it would be her last time. She was strangely attached to this grave. She knew logically that the person who inhabited it was dead. They couldn't hear her, see her, she was wasting her time. For the second instance in her life, she ignored logic. Here she was, again, laying flowers on his grave.

He died two months ago. She was crushed. She hid herself in work and didn't let anyone see how much she was falling apart. She was dragged to his funeral. She looked down shamefully as she remembered that. What if Booth was right? What if he could hear and see her? She wouldn't want him to see her with her walls up, acting like she was fine. She sure didn't want him to see her like this either…weepy and distraught.

She stepped forward even closer. She touched the headstone, running her fingers over the engraved words. Seeley Booth…Beloved father, soldier, partner, and friend.

She wiped her eyes before any tears could fall from her already welling eyes.

"You asked me to come see you once. When you were alive…I scoffed at you but here I am" She started, speaking to the ethereal Booth.

"You said you'd like it if I came by…I know this isn't logical…but I don't give a damn anymore. Booth, why did you do it?" She asked, almost expecting his velvet voice to respond.

"That damn bullet! Why didn't you let her shoot me? That crazy bitch! I have not lost one minute of sleep over taking her life. I'd do it again, Booth. I know you wouldn't like me saying that…but it's the truth. Why did you have to step in front of that bullet? Why?! Why do I hurt so much, Booth? I can't stop crying. I'm a mess. You said you'd always be there for me…where the hell are you, Booth? Why did you have to do that? Why???"

She took a step back, wiped her eyes, and took a deep breath.

"You're dead, so it probably won't mean much now, but I want to tell you. That night that they told me you were dead…was the worst night of my life. I would take torture. I would take the trunk of that damn car. I would take anything besides that. I wish you would've let me get shot. They're calling you a hero, Booth. You've always been a hero, though. I wish you wouldn't have been so heroic this time."

"I went home…no—I went to your apartment. I let myself in. I opened your closet and just took in your scent. I put on one of your shirts…your garish socks…a busy tie…and even your cocky belt buckle. I don't know why I did this, Booth. And if you can hear me, you better not be laughing." She rolled her eyes. "I put it all on…and I walked around your apartment for hours. I took a bath in your bathtub; with the clothes still on…I fell asleep in your bed…with wet clothes and all. I have no idea why I did all this. But I just wanted to be closer to you…illogical, because you're deceased. I cried. I couldn't stop crying. Not even at work. I pretended I was okay, but the second I thought of you, I went to the bathroom and cried.

"Why did you leave me here, Booth? What good am I without you? I feel worthless and useless. I hate it. I hate being without you. Why did you step in front of that fucking bullet Booth?" I asked again, biting my words. I knew I'd never get a reply, but I kept hoping.

"It's too late now, I guess. But I loved you Booth. You made me believe in love. You made me fall in love. And you never even knew it. I should've told you, but I was scared. Scared that you didn't feel the same or…I don't know. I was scared. But I loved you. I still love you…that's so illogical. I'm sorry I never told you. I love you. Why did you leave me? Why did you step in front of that bullet? Because you love me?" She pondered thinking how twisted it was that he died because he loved her enough to save her life. She wanted to scoff. She didn't.

"I would've done the same thing, Booth."