Disclaimer: I don't own the universe or the characters from the movie Inception. I'm just making a bit of fair use of them.

A/N: This was written in response to the prompt: Inception, Arthur/Eames, "Darling, why is there a giant wooden horse in your dream?"

Don't touch the horse

When they want to do a full dress rehearsal with killer projections, they practice in Eames dreams, since he has a proper militarized subconscious.

But when they just want to experiment and are first figuring out some new technique, they often practice in Arthur's dreams because, despite pretty much everyone's expectations, his projections are rather decent sorts who leave them alone to their practice runs without trying to kill them all.

It's weird. Everybody has killer projections. Some are militarized and some are not, but they're all killers. Except for Arthur's.

But there's always been a weird paradox about him, Eames thinks. He looks innately young and innocent with his slender figure and wide eyes. And yet, he also looks incredibly dangerous with his sharp suits and cold glare. And the guns. You can't forget the guns. And he is deadly, except that apparently his subconscious is just as sweet and innocent as his first impression is.

It's weird.

Also weird is, "Darling, why is there always a giant wooden horse in your dreams?"

"Did you want to practice your forging here or psychoanalyze me?"

"I am fully capable of doing both. Come on, a giant wooden horse."

"Just leave the horse alone."

If it had been anyone else, Eames would know better than to mess with a projection. But Arthur's projections weren't dangerous.

So, of course, he went up to inspect the giant wooden horse. It was massive, like the size of a house. Beautifully carved too, with scenes from ancient battles.

"Were you an art major, darling?"

"History major, Eames, which quite clearly you are not. Let me be very logical for you: We are here in my dreams because my projections don't attack, correct?"

"Yes."

"And yet, everyone has killer projections, correct?"

"I've always thought you were a unique little snowflake, dear heart."

"Shut up. If everyone has killer projections but you don't see mine, that *should* tell you that mine are hidden."

Eames finally touched the horse without thinking about it, simply by leaning casually against one of the legs. "Oh come on, darling, we've been everywhere in this dream. Where could they possibly be hidden?"

There was a moment when he thought he heard a creaking noise coming from behind him. It sounded a bit like a wooden door opening.

And that was how Eames discovered that Arthur's subconscious was militarized like a death squad of double-oh spies.