You're Still an Innocent

When Dani feels as if she's lost all sense of hope and happiness, the youngest turtle reminds her of light and innocence. Brother/sister fluff between Mikey and my OC Dani Hamato. Based off 'My Entire Fault', please read that but you don't have to in order to understand this. Review!

I don't own anything, just Dani. Taylor Swift gets credit for the song and my title, and Laird and Eastman get credit for the TMNT.

Dani's POV

I'm sitting on my bed, staring up at the ceiling. A week ago today, my second eldest brother Raph and I had been saved from Agent Bishop by our other three brothers, after being held captive for ten days.

And trust me, those were ten freaking long, freaking painful days for our whole family.

Leo, Don, and Master Splinter had been fussing over Raphie and I for a week, and Raph was getting sick of it. He loved our brothers and master, but he hated being coddled, particularly since he claims I was injured worse than he was.

In a way… he's kinda right.

You see, the physical trauma didn't just include beatings and tests for me; I was scarred emotionally and physically the day we were rescued. Baxter Stockman, a scientist under Bishop's wing who once served the Shredder, did something, TOOK something from me.

He raped me, stealing my virginity and my innocence that I had been proud of.

I had nightmares about the painful experience every night. Leo and Raph literally came flying into my room to wake me up every time, but as a result, they were sleep deprived and worried for me. Last night, Leo had just made me sleep in his room, and he stopped the nightmare from going too far, but I was still terrified.

Thus the constant coddling, even in the face of our remarkable recoveries. Donnie said just today that Raph and I were healing fine- except for my 'emotional instability', as he called it.

I had sighed, 'Just say it, Don. I'm psychotic.'

Don shook his head fiercely, 'Not psychotic, sweetheart. You have post-traumatic stress disorder. It is expected in your situation…'

'Raph is fine' I cut off. 'Either I'm really weak, or I'm psycho.'

Leo, who was holding me, looked me in the eye, 'Raph's experience wasn't exactly like yours. Baby, TALK to me. I know you're hiding in that… incident. You need to let it out, let it go.'

Mikey opened his mouth, but Raph snapped, 'You sing that song, and I'll rip out your voice box for the good of all of our hearing.' –yes, that is a Frozen reference, no, I have no shame-

A ghost of a smile came to my face, and Raph smirked, 'Dani, Leo's right. You need to tell us everything you're feeling if you wanna get better. Help us help you, sis.'

I shook my head, 'It isn't your problem, and I won't make it so. Raph, you were injured badly too, and I can't even imagine what you three and Master Splinter went through. I have to handle this alone.'

I then got up and walked out, ignoring my brothers' desperate pleas for me to stay. Now here I was in my room, blocking memories and fighting tears all alone in the dark.

Until I heard a timid knock on my door. I raised an eyebrow, not because I didn't expect someone to come after me, but because of WHO came after me. I knew each of the boys' knocks; this was Mikey.

I sighed, 'Come in, aka-chan. Door is open.'

Mikey peeked in, looking every bit the role of 'little brother'. Despite the fact that I'm technically the youngest, I easily fell into calling Mikey my aka-chan. He was so sweet and innocent, far more so than I am.

Or at least, as I was. My innocence was gone.

Mikey smiled timidly, 'Can I come in, sissy?'

I nodded, 'Of course. Are you okay?'

He smirked, 'Of course I'm okay. My big brother and favorite sister are home. But…' He hesitated, and I raised a wary eyebrow at him.

Mike looked me in the eyes, 'You aren't really back, Dani. I miss you, sissy.'

I sighed, 'I'm sorry, sweetie. I changed, I know that, but I can't accept what I lost.'

'What?' Mikey asked.

'My innocence is gone' I replied bitterly, tears rolling down my cheeks, 'I'm damaged and dirty and I can't stand myself.'

Mikey looked at me thoughtfully, then stood up and walked out. He returned a minute later with a CD, which he promptly placed in my player. He skipped to a song, and said, 'Listen to this.'

I cocked my head, recognizing my favorite singer, Taylor Swift.

I guess you really did it this time. Left yourself in your war path. Lost your balance on a tightrope. Lost your mind trying to get it back.

I pursed my lips at how dead on this was.

Wasn't it easier in your lunchbox days? Always a bigger bed to crawl into. Wasn't it beautiful when you believed in everything, and everybody believed in you?

I sighed with a small smile. I remember when the only thing I had to do to chase away the nightmares was crawl into Leo's or Raph's or Master Splinter's bed. When my family's encouragement and support were all I needed to get through anything; when I had faith in the good in everyone and everything.

It's alright, just wait and see. Your string of lights are still bright to me, oh. Who you are is not where you've been. You're still an Innocent.

My ears perked at the word 'innocent'. Mikey smirked at me; this was all what he believed.

You're still an Innocent.

There's some things you can't speak of. But at night you live it all again. You wouldn't be shattered on the floor now, if only you had seen what you know now then.

I was sobbing. Why hadn't I seen it coming? Why hadn't I stopped it, stopped him, before it was too late? Now I was broken, carrying the burden of my haunting memories while isolating myself from my family.

Wasn't it easier in your firefly-catching days? When everything out of reach, someone bigger brought down to you. Wasn't it beautiful, running wild til you fell asleep, before the monsters caught up to you?

Yeah, back when I'd run carefree with my brothers, playing and laughing all day in a way only children can. When someone always picked me up, and it was okay that I needed help because I was too little. Before everything in our lives went downhill, before the guys went to the surface… before Stockman's mousers started the chain of events that led to all our wild adventures.

It's alright, just wait and see. Your string of lights are still bright to me, oh. Who you are is not where you've been. You're still an Innocent.

It's okay that life is a tough crowd. 32 and still growing up now. Who you are is not what you did. You're still an Innocent.

I listened intently. I gazed up at Mikey, who was smiling at me encouragingly, mouthing the lines with Taylor to get his point across stronger.

Time turns flames to embers. You'll have new Septembers. Every one of us has messed up, too. Ooohh.

I started to see it, then. I wasn't the first to make mistakes, to learn the hard way. But everyone had second chances… even me.

Lives change like the weather.

How many times had I experienced or witness opposing moments? Times where I thought my boys and I weren't going to see tomorrow. Yet, there were also times that held endless happiness, times where anything was possible and life was basically perfect.

I hope you'll remember, today is never too late to be brand new.

I looked at my brother, who was watching me anxiously.

I whispered, 'Thank you.' And I threw my arms around him, crying into his shoulder as the chorus played once more.

It's alright, just wait and see. Your string of lights are still bright to me, oh. Who you are is not where you've been. You're still an Innocent.

It's okay that life is a tough crowd. 32 and still growing up now. Who you are is not what you did. You're still an Innocent.

You're still an Innocent.

Lost your balance on a tightrope. It's never too late to get it back.

I smiled. I was going to regain my balance. I wouldn't ever just fall; I couldn't ever just fall, because as Leo said, 'If one of us goes down, we all go down.'

As the song finished, I giggled, 'Come with me. I have an idea I've been dying to test out.'

I whispered the plan into his ear and Mike chuckled, 'Evil. I'm in.'

I dashed into the living room, and landed on the couch. I heard my three bros talking in Don's lab, obviously about me.

I closed my eyes, and Mikey screamed, 'GUYS, SOMETHING'S UP WITH DANI!'

The lab door slammed open, and not a second later, Leo was holding me, 'Baby, what is it?!'

Raph asked, 'Is she hurt?'

I moaned, 'Raphie…'

I felt him take my hand, 'I'm here, sweetie. Raphie's right here next to ya.'

I sniffed, 'Raph, you need to know…' I could feel how tense he, Leo, and Don were, thinking I was saying my last words.

I opened my eyes and grinned, 'You SOOO need to stop falling for that.'

Raph blinked as Mikey and I almost peed ourselves laughing.

Mikey choked out, 'You'd think after I did that, you'd know better.' Leo and Don sighed in relief, shaking their heads.

Leo tickled me and scolded, 'You little brat, don't you scare me like that.'

I giggled, 'Thought a prank would be the most entertaining way to tell you I'm okay now. And it was.'

All three boys looked confused, then glanced at Mikey, who winked, 'I covered it, and now Dani is back to normal. Well, Dani-normal, anyway.'

'Says the five-foot talking turtle' I snapped, and smacked him upside the head. Mikey wrapped both arms around me, 'Love you, sissy!'

I laughed, hugging him back, 'Love you back, aka-chan!'

Our older brothers wrapped us both in a five-sibling hug, and we sat like that, cherishing our innocent family bond.

Aaaaand, done! Let me know if you all want more one-shots! I may do Casey, April, and Master Splinter, but what about Leatherhead, Angel, etc?