Holiday Exchange Fic for Hika! Her prompt: non-traditional traditions, modern AU, found family, "fucking snow why the hell are you even around?!", fake dating! Warring Clans characters. FLUFF. I know you people too well.
I also want to thank Qui for betaing this and Rai for helping me with the summary and title because I was at a loss.
Izuna flops down at the table and slumps over, resting his head on the table. The smell of coffee makes him sit up, he looks at Tōka blankly for a minute before he registers the cup in front of his face.
"Goddess," he mutters "thank you."
She snorts, thrusting the mug into his raised hands before spinning to sit in her own seat. Mito comes into the room with a plate laden with toast, Tobirama follows behind her carrying a platter of bacon. He stares at Tōka before glancing pointedly at the paperwork Hashirama left sprawled across the table last night. She stares back before gathering the paper up in a deliberate manner, making sure every piece is lined up with the others before moving to the next. Tobirama rolls his eyes but patiently waits for her to finally move the stack to the coffee table. She flounces back to the table, giving Tobirama her most innocent smile. Tobirama's eyebrow twitches before deliberately ignoring her. He sets the platter on the table before immediately returning to the kitchen for the rest of the food. Mito sets her plate down before following him. Tobirama returns with a bowl of eggs in one hand and a cup of coffee in the other.
Izuna is sipping on his coffee, glancing worriedly at the twitching figure of his brother by the window. He looks to Tobirama, raising his eyebrow in question. All he gets in return is Tobirama's best I-Am-So-Done-With-His-Shit face that he usually reserves for when Hashirama and Madara are at their most Dramatic™. Deeming that avenue a lost cause, he returns to contemplating Madara.
"Fucking snow! Why the hell are you even around?!"
Coffee nearly comes out his nose at the outburst, and he's happy all around to not experience such though the choking from such a quick swallow is almost as bad. Tōka cackles gleefully. Mito rolls her eyes as she returns with the stack of plates and silverware, used to Madara's dramatics after so long living together. A shuffling sound in the hallway distracts Izuna and he glances up to see Hashirama making his way to the table like a zombie. Izuna had been rather astounded when he realized that, of the Senju brothers, Tobirama was the morning person and not Hashirama like he thought he was. Izuna kindly pushes Hashirama's chair out from under the table with his leg, before setting his cup down and grabbing the plate that Mito hands him to put in front of Hashirama. He'd rather not have another incident occur from Hashirama thinking the chair was out when it wasn't like a few days ago.
"Madara, stop complaining and come eat." Tobirama snaps.
'He's always had the least patience with Madara's dramatics.' Izuna muses.
Madara whips around to stare at him, "Complaining?!" he splutters, "This is Konoha! We don't get snow!"
"We got snow two years ago." Tobirama commented, his tone implying there was a you moron left off the end.
Madara flails a little before snapping at Tōka, "Stop cackling, Witch!"
Izuna facepalms as Tōka's cackling increases in volume. 'Brother still hasn't realized that only encourages her.' Tōka always got the most fun in making Madara flail ever since they were all kids.
Madara's eyebrow twitches before he drops down into his chair with a huff.
"We can't have our traditional Paintball Tournament this year because of it." Madara complains.
Hashirama absently pats Madara on the shoulder before groping blindly for his coffee. Izuna saves the bacon from being groped just in time, while Tobirama nudges the wanted coffee into Hashirama's hands.
Mito smirks, "Hoping to pay me back from last year?"
He glares at her, "That was a lucky shot! I'll win this time, Harpy!"
"Lucky? I'd been following you for over five minutes when you finally realized I was there."
Madara opens his mouth to retort, but Tobirama shoves a slice of toast in to shut him up.
Hashirama looks up blearily, "What are we talking about?"
"It's snowing." Tōka answers.
"Oh, okay." he says before refocusing on his coffee.
Everyone looks at Hashirama, waiting to see when it finally clicks in his head. Izuna mentally starts counting to ten, he makes it to five before his head snaps up.
"IT'S SNOWING?!" he asks in excitement.
Hashirama hops up and runs to the nearest window, he lets out a whoop of joy. Everyone returns to fixing their plates. He turns around starry-eyed, "Have you seen how much snow we've gotten?! We've gotten at least five inches so far!"
"Yes brother, but now we can't have the Paintball Tournament." replies Tobirama.
Hashirama droops in dismay before perking up, "We could have a snowball fight!"
"No." Madara denies flatly.
Wilting in sadness, Hashirama makes his way back to the table. He drops down in his seat and grabs a couple of slices of toast and bacon to make a sandwich out of. Mito hands Hashirama the bowl of scrambled eggs, who scoops out a spoonful before passing it back. He pokes at his eggs dejectedly.
"Stop sulking." snaps Madara.
"But if we can't go Paintballing and you don't want to have a snowball fight, what are we going to do this year?" Hashirama whines childishly.
Izuna shrugs, too busy chewing on toast to answer. Tōka makes a thoughtful noise causing everyone to look up. She swallows her bacon before answering, "You know, last month a Laser Tag place opened near Ichiraku's."
They freeze, Tōka smirks.
"All in favor?" she asks smugly.
The shark-like grins she gets in reply are answer enough.
A figure slinks through the darkness before ducking behind a wall. The figure peeks around the corner, grinning when they see a familiar head of white hair duck behind a wall. Stiffening when they hear movement behind them, they whip around while bringing their gun up. They deflate when they see it's one of their partners.
"Izuna, don't sneak up on me like that!" they hiss.
Izuna smiles sheepishly, "Sorry, Tōka."
Tōka harumps before asking quietly, "Have you seen the others?"
He answers back just as quietly, "Mito is stalking Madara, but I haven't seen Hashirama or Tobirama. What about you?"
Tōka jerks her head to the right, "Tobirama is that way. We might have to take them both out before finding Hashirama."
Izuna nods, then opens his mouth to reply when he's cut off by a ding and Madara cursing. They trade amused looks.
"Brother will be insufferable." he says mournfully.
She snickers some before quieting down, "Let's go get Tobirama."
They share a grin before coming out from behind the wall they're hiding behind. They walk silently through the darkness, before crouching behind a barrier. Tōka catches Izuna's eye before pointing out the wall Tobirama hid behind. He nods, hefts up his gun and straightens up. He makes his way slowly to the wall she pointed out while Tōka peeks over the top of the barrier and brings her gun up to get a clear shot. Izuna swings around the corner and comes back out a moment later. He turns to her and shrugs he's putting his gun down when she sees a shadow behind him.
"Behind!" she shouts.
Izuna stiffens and goes to swing around when his vest lights up and dings. He slumps in dismay, before smirking. Izuna turns around and sweeps Tobirama's legs out from under him and he goes down with a yelp. Tōka cackles as she gets up and hurries over. Izuna beams from where he's sitting on Tobirama. She collapses against the wall at the unimpressed look Tobirama shoots her, laughing uncontrollably. Tōka shakingly brings her gun up and Izuna obligingly moves over so she can shoot Tobirama's vest. Tobirama rolls his eyes at them when the vest lights up and dings.
"Off." he orders.
Izuna snickers as he gets up, sticking out a hand to help Tobirama up. He grunts as Tobirama pulls himself up.
Tōka straightens up, "Do you know where your brother is?"
"I don–" he starts to deny before getting cut off by a ding.
Then the lights come on.
Mito hides her smug smile behind her teacup as Madara sulks.
"Damn Harpy, always sneaking up on people." he grumbles.
Izuna, with a look of longsuffering on his face, pats Madara on the shoulder. Hashirama leans forward to look at Madara earnestly, "Maybe next year, Madara."
Madara's face reddens dangerously, looking ready to explode into a rant. Their ears are saved by Ichiraku and his grandson bringing their ramen. Mito perks up in anticipation, setting her tea down she snatches up her chopsticks.
"Here you go guys, will you be wanting more?" Ichiraku asks cheerfully.
"Yes, please. Thank you." Hashirama answers.
"Alright, enjoy!" he replies before going to help the next customer.
"Thank you for the food." they chorus before digging in.
Mito sits back with a sigh of appreciation, sending a quick smile to Ichiraku as he gathers their bowls. Tōka slumps over the table in happiness, while Hashirama leans back in his chair in bliss.
"Thank you, Ichiraku-san." Tobirama says politely.
"You're welcome! Anything for my best customers." he answers jovially.
As he wanders to the back to clean the dishes, Madara turns and asks, "What movie are we watching this year?"
Izuna perks up, "Star Wars?"
Mito makes a noise of disagreement, "That can wait until the newest comes out on Blu-ray. Harry Potter?"
"We watched that last year." Tobirama comments.
"Game of Thrones?" Tōka suggests.
"I said movie, Witch." Madara retorts.
Tōka grunts in acknowledgment and they fall into a contemplative silence.
"I know!" Hashirama says triumphantly, "The Hobbit and Lord of the Rings!"
"We haven't seen those in a while." Tobirama remarks.
Hashirama claps his hands, "Then it's settled! Let's go home!"
Tobirama looks away from the TV as Hashirama comes bounding into the room, Tōka hot on his heels. Izuna follows, watching them in amusement, a giant bowl of popcorn in his arms.
"Hashirama! Give me the ice cream!" she demands as Hashirama hides behind Mito.
"No! If I do, you won't share!"
"Yes, I will."
Hashirama looks at her hopefully over Mito's shoulder, "Really?!"
Tōka sighs, "Yes, I'll share."
Hashirama cheers. Tōka points at him sharply, "Just this once though!"
Tobirama shares an eye-roll with Madara as the other two go back into the kitchen. Izuna hands the popcorn bowl to Tobirama then goes to sprawl across the rug in front of the coffee table. Tobirama grabs a handful of popcorn before passing the bowl to Madara, trading an amused look with Mito at the way Madara hunches over it protectively. They all sit in a comfortable silence while they wait for Hashirama and Tōka to come back.
A few minutes later they come back in the room carrying their ice cream, Hashirama carrying a mug in one hand and a bowl in the other. Tōka plops down next to Izuna and Hashirama curls up next to Mito on the love seat. He hands her the mug and she sends him a smile.
"Are we ready to watch the movie?" Tobirama asks.
"Yes." Mito confirms.
Tobirama grabs the remote from the armrest and presses play then leans back to enjoy the movie.
From the nest on the floor, Madara elbows Tobirama in the side as he feels him twitch at another inaccuracy in the movie.
"Honestly, you've seen this movie how many times? You should be used to it by now." Madara remarks.
Hashirama laughs lightly from Madara's other side as Tobirama huffs in annoyance. Tōka and Izuna join in from where they're stretched out on Tobirama's other side. Madara elbows him again when Tobirama rolls his eyes at all of them.
"What are we laughing about?" Mito asks.
She laughs as Madara and Hashirama jump and flail at being snuck up on. She steps over Tobirama and Madara to drop down into Hashirama's lap. Tōka hides her face in Izuna's shoulder, shaking with suppressed laughter, as Hashirama turns bright red.
"We're laughing about Tobirama twitching." Izuna answers.
Mito hums in acknowledgment, cradling her mug of hot chocolate. She glances over slyly at Madara, he narrows his eyes at her. Madara can already feel himself bristling.
"It's started to snow again." she mentions casually.
Madara's eye twitches and he restrains the urge to shout.
"I'm ignoring you." he informs her.
The others break into laughter as Mito smiles at him sweetly.
"I don't know why I put up with you idiots." Madara grumbles.
"Because we're amazing, duh." Tōka answers flippantly. What she really means is, because we care about you, you moron.
Madara rolls his eyes at her even as he feels a smile tugging at his lips. Izuna perks up from where he's been keeping an eye on the TV, before shushing everyone. "Dáin is arriving!"
Hours later, with the sun starting to lighten up the sky, Hashirama sits and looks at his slumbering family. He smiles fondly at the way Izuna and Tōka curl around each other, their legs tangled with Tobirama's and Madara's. Tobirama is practically burrowed into Madara's side and Mito is using Madara's stomach as a pillow, her legs resting in his lap. Hashirama leans over to reach the remote and turn off the TV before laying down as well, his head by Mito's. Yawning, he closes his eyes, curling closer to Mito.
They might argue and butt heads. They might get too much fun out of pushing each other's buttons, but at the end of the day they're a family.
He wouldn't have it any other way.