This is silly really...but oh well...i hope you enjoy it anyways.

I don't own Rent.

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Embarrassed

Maureen was sitting in the bathroom holding her stomach. She was in pain. She went out with the boho's last night and shared two pounds of hot wings with Roger. She was totally paying for it today. And all she could do was curse at her digestive systems.

"Why won't you work?!" She scolded her stomach. She then fell on the ground, the cramps in her abdomen twisting.

"At least let me barf…" Maureen whined, and curled into a fetal position.

"Honeybear?" Joanne knocked on the door. "Is everything okay in there? You've been in there for over an hour."

"Yes…uh…I'm fine." Maureen lied, she wasn't fine at all. She was just too embarrassed to share her problem with Joanne.

"Uh okay…" Joanne said uncertainly.

Joanne sat on her bed, staring at the bathroom door. She was worried about Maureen. All she could hear were whimpers, and Maureen talking to herself. She wanted to know what was going on, especially if Maureen was hurt…or worse hurting herself!

Just then the bathroom door slowly opened and Maureen stuck her head out. "Pookie? Can you hand me the phone?"

Joanne grabbed the cordless and walked over to Maureen, but before she gave it to her she began to ask questions. "Babe what's wrong?"

"Nothing." Maureen said and tried to grab the phone.

"You don't sound good." Joanne said while pulling the phone away.

"Please I'm fine!" Maureen said through clenched teeth, trying to hide the pain. "Just give me the phone, I need to call Collins."

"Come on, I'm your girlfriend, I can help you with whatever you need." Joanne said.

Maureen reached out and successfully grabbed the phone, and then very quickly retreated back into the bathroom. "I need Collins for this, sorry Jo." She called out.

Joanne huffed. She wanted to know what Maureen was up to.

About fifteen minutes later the apartment door flew open, and Collins rushed in with a bag in his hand.

"She in the bathroom?" He asked Joanne who was still on the bed waiting to see what kind of problem the diva was suffering from.

"Yes." Joanne said and quickly stood up. "Collins what is wrong with her?"

"Sorry Jo…I swore I would keep this a secret." He then opened the bathroom door and began to enter. Before he slipped inside he popped his head back out. "You know how that best friend stuff works."

"Well is she hurt?" Joanne asked with concern. "Come on, you know how that girlfriend stuff works. I just want to know if she is okay."

Collins took a glance in the bathroom, taking in the sight of Maureen hunched over with her hands clutching her stomach. "Well…" He began and then made eye contact with the lawyer. "She isn't doing well…but no worries she will be as good as knew in a little while."

"Collins tell me what's wrong!" Joanne demanded, but Collins simply ignored her and shut the door in her face.

"Did you bring the stuff?" Maureen asked in a weak voice.

Collins chuckled. "You're such a drama queen, it isn't that bad."

"Yes it is!" Maureen said and grabbed the bag Collins brought over. "I hate Roger for making me eat all of those wings!"

Collins grinned and watched as Maureen downed some medicine. "So what are you going to tell Joanne?"

"Nothing." Maureen said.

"She's pretty worried about you." Collins said. "You have to tell her something."

Maureen shrugged. "I'll worry about that later…right now I just want some relief."

Collins couldn't help but laugh again. "You don't have to be embarrassed Mo, it's just Joanne, she's your girlfriend, she'll understand."

"No it will turn her off if I tell her." Maureen pouted. "And then every time she looks at me she won't see sexy Maureen…she'll see…Maureen sitting on the toilet, with a scrunched up red face!"

Collins couldn't help but burst into laughter. "You are something else I tell ya."

"Shut up!" Maureen yelled. "Stuff like this isn't supposed to happen to me. This is gross and un-Maureen like!"

"I think Joanne has seen you worse…" Collins said with an amused smile. "She holds your hair back when you barf. I think it's safe to tell her what's wrong."

"That's different." Maureen argued.

Collins crossed his arms, arching an eyebrow. "How?"

Maureen thought about it for a moment, but then shook her head. "I don't know. Leave me alone I can't argue right now, I'm in pain!" She then began to pull down her pajama pants. "Now leave or I'll do this in front of you."

"Okay, okay!" Collins held up his hands in defense, he then headed for the door. "Well it's nice to know you're comfortable to talk to me about this. I like our friendship Mo…it does get disgusting but it makes me love you even more." He then turned the knob to head out. "Well good luck with um…how do I put this…dropping the kids off at the pool."

Maureen rolled her eyes and sarcastically replied, "Thanks."

"Well?" Joanne said once Collins walked out of the bathroom.

"She's doing fine." Collins smiled. "Well I have to get back to Angel. She's baking me cookies!" With that the professor skipped out of the apartment.

Twenty minutes later Maureen walked out of the bathroom letting out a frustrated sigh. She noticed Joanne's concern look, but decided to ignore it and climbed into bed.

"Maureen?"

"Don't ask!" Maureen said and pulled the covers over her head.

"Okay…" Joanne cautiously said and then headed for the bathroom. When she entered she found a bottle sitting on the counter, one Maureen forgot to hide. Out of curiosity she picked it up and read the label. "Fast constipation relief." Joanne set down the bottle, letting out a breath, happy Maureen wasn't suffering from anything serious.

"Maureen?" Joanne called out, while entering the bedroom. "It's okay."

"What is?" Maureen grumbled.

"I know what you are suffering from." Joanne said.

Maureen's eyes went wide. "Shit I forgot to hide the bottle."

Joanne laughed, and sat on the edge of the bed. "It's okay sweetie…it happens."

"But it's gross. How badly are you turned off right now?" Maureen pouted.

Joanne smirked and ran her hand through the diva's hair. "I'm not turned off at all. I'm happy that you're okay. The only thing that turns me off is when you're in pain."

Maureen couldn't help but smile.

"So…" Joanne said. "You have to fart."

"Shut up!" Maureen screamed and rolled over to face away from the laughing lawyer. "This isn't funny, and I don't fart!"

"Everyone farts." Joanne giggled.

"I don't!" Maureen matter-of-factly stated

"Okay…but you do get moody, so I'll just leave you be." Joanne smiled and kissed the top of Maureen's head.

Maureen pulled a pillow over her head as Joanne left the room. About ten minutes later she felt something and sprang up from the bed. Then with a smile she ran to the bathroom. "This is it!" She said with joy, and closed the bathroom door…relief was coming her way.

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lol! Weird eh?