Harry was impatient. Not that patience had ever been his strong suit, but he was not particularly fond of waiting around for things. And he was especially annoyed that he was waiting around for Severus Snape of all people. His thoughts sobered at the memory of seeing Snape bleeding out on the floor of the Shrieking Shake. Harry was no healer, and he still wondered how his mind was clear enough to give Snape some of his blood, which was laced with the antidote Arthur had come up with the counter Nagini's venom. After that it was a matter of instinct. Still when he looked down at his hands he sometimes thought he saw Snape's blood on them.
And that was the reason why they were in this mess now. Wizarrd's blood is a powerful thing. It has the power to destroy, create and bind. It has the power to free. It has the power to save lives. Harry understood this now, more so now than when he was a stupid seventeen year old boy. Still he was not sure why he had thought to give Snape his blood. Sure the antidote, but he had not even been thinking...
"The thoughtless look suits you well, Potter as it is your normitive state."
Snape's voice had almost returned to normal, deep and smooth with a hint of an Southern accent. Harry was bothered enough to reply to Snape's jab, but just at that moment a short, balding man approached them. Adjusting his spectacles before speaking, he gave them a tight smile.
"Mr. Potter, Professor Snape. If you would follow me, please? Mr. Botwright is waiting fo you in his office"
Harry glanced at Snape as he moved to follow the man down the hall. The professor did not look any paler than he usually was, and definitely not as pale as in the moments when he almost lost his life (and the months that followed). He sounded almost normal, after not being able to speak for nearly half a year and he no longer walked with a limp. Harry was glad, despite the fact that he had at one point thought he hated Professor Snape. He was glad that the man was alive. He was happy that more lives had been saved rather than lost. But nothing could ever make him forget the things that the wizarding world had done for him; the things that they had given up. And no matter how many people advised him that he was not at fault, that these things were given willingly, nothing could ever make the guilt (and the weight of the lives lost) go away. It was a short walk down the hall to the Office of Magical Blood Bonds. Harry had attempted to do some research into what type of bond he could have possibly forced upon himself and Professor Snape, but to be honest he was a little of frightened of what he might find. He had hoped that after the war he would be able to disappear and fade away from the world, but that was not the case.
For some reason he could not and did not want to leave Hogwarts. Coincidentally, or not so coincidentally, Professor Snape also had the same ailment. Something in Harry told him that the Professor had a better idea of what was going on than he did. And he had the stinking suspicion that Snape was keeping his knowledge from him intentionally.
Mr. Botwright was also a very short man, though he had long curly bown hair and dark brown eyes. He was a bit round and Harry wondered if the man used a magical boost potion to make him appear taller. He was not certain though because the wizard was sitting down.
"Good afternoon, sirs. Why don't both of you take a seat and we can get stated discussing the contract that was formed between you two. It is quite unusual. So maybe first we can go over the events that led to the bond being formed."
Though his words were said with a smile, Harry knew that the issue at hand was much more serious than a simple contract. And it worried him. If the so called contract kept Snape alive, then he would just have to live with the consequences. Taking a deep breath and hoping to hell that his Occulems skills had gotten a little better, he went into a brief synopsis about the events at the Shrieking Shack.
Even though this had happened nearly a year ago, the event still played a big part in his nightmares. The fear and all of his feelings. Holding Severus in his arms, cradling his head in his lap- using a piece of wood to cut open his arm and let the blood flow onto Severus's most fatal looking wounds. He had been crying then too; overwhelmed with the emotion of losing his friends in battle and knowing that they were struggling and to just see the professor like that. To see the professor nearly dead when the wizard was so strong and defiant. His will to live was downright admirable and that was a thought that still lingered in Harry's head from time to time.
"Professor Snape, do you have anything to add, or is this account quite accurate?"
"It is as accurate as possible. I was not conscious, but I did view Potter's memories of the night."
That was true too. Harry cinged. He had poured all of his memories of that night (basically, the entire Battle at Hogwarts) into Snape's pensieve. It was used in court multiple times. It libeated both Professor Snape and Narcissa Malfoy. Harry still felt raw taking so many memoies out of his head and it made him feel like an open book to know that Snape had looked over all of them. Him more than anyone else.
"Do you have an idea of what may have happened, Professor. I know that you would have studied things like this with a Mastery in Potions and such. The types of potions that require Wizard's Blood."
The short wizard gave Snape an inquiring look, which was returned with a basic and well, expected, glare.
"Oh, right. Moving on. To cut right to the chase, the bond and subsequent contract that has formed between you is quite simple, but also very complex. It is a bond of the Core."
Harry's brain processed the information. This was one of those things he was fightened of. A Core bond might as well have been a marriage contract.
"And the contract that has come from it is one of marriage."
The tension in the room was palpable. Core bonds were irrreversable. It took two very powerful wizards to bond their Cores, it created a kind of immortality for the participants in the bond and allowed for a sharing of power (amongst other things) but it also prevented the two bonded from being too far away from each other. Literally, if one half of the newly formed Core was destroyed, the other half would slowly lose power and die. A painfully slow and atrocious death.
"A marriage contract initiated by a Core bond is unfotunately unalterable. The contract will last for as long as the bond."
The wizard behind the desk said solemnly. Harry glared at him and avoided looking at Severus. He did not want to see any of Severus's reaction to the news. It was obvious that he was angry, or in some capacity furious. Harry could not say that he was furious, he was too much in shock, but this was not something he wanted. This. He just wanted to go away.
"How could this have happened. Marriage contracts fom Core bonds are rare." Snape hissed and Harry flinched at the sound.
It had been almost two years since he had last been a student in Snape's Potions class, but he got the feeling that he was about to undergo a scolding, calloused lecture of some sort. And Harry was not fond of being lectured.
"There are many factors that could have contributed to the formation of the contract, but it is dependent upon want. Mr. Potter, may I ask what do you want most in life? What is your aspiration now that you have destroyed Vol...Him?" Harry knew the answer immediately.
"A family, but I was not thinking so when I was trying to save the Professor. I just did not want anyone else to die."
"That is common, Mr. Potter. But that is not how these things work. And you, Professor Snape. If I may ask, what is the thing that you want most in life now?"
"To be left alone." Harry looked up sharply at Snape's brisk comment. He had not expected the stoic wizad to answer the question. Though he was not certain that the professor was telling the whole truth, he was surprised that Seveus wanted something that was at least the same as what he wanted.
"From your look Mr. Potter, I would assume that this is something you desire as well?" Harry turned his attention back to the wizard behind his desk and nodded.
Snape was avoiding eye contact with him. Harry was not bothered by this. He was certain that Snape's glare was burning a hole into Mr. Botwright's skull anyway.
"Uh, yes."
"As eloquent as ever, Potter."
Snape sneered and Harry gritted his teeth together to avoid starting an argument. And he did not want Snape to chew him out right then and there anyway. He would have to try and find him in Hogwarts to that then.
"I believe also that the venom from the snake bite is a contributing factor as well. I have no idea what kind of effect that will have on the bond so it is something to think about."
"Hopefully, it will dissolve it as easily as it dissolves flesh." Snape said poignantly.
"I'm leaving. You've told us all that you can." Harry stood and storrmed out of the room, letting his anger get the best of him. He just wanted out of Snape's presence. The wizard did not make anything easy in any way. There was no way that they would have to be married. It was laughable as they could barely stand each other living in the same structure. The thought of living with Snape in the same quarters, in close contact was the most ludicrous thought that had ever crosssed his mind. They would kill each other. As soon as Harry could, he apparated back to Hogsmeade and lost himself in a dark corner of the Hogs Head to drink himself stupid.
"I've been waiting for you to return. I see you are you father's son in every way, Potter."
"Shuddup."
Harry slurred. He had drank more Firewhiskey than he thought humanly possible and returning to his quarters he had not expected Snape to have broken in and be sitting on his favorite chair. The chair the he always fell into when he came stumbling into his rooms late at night piss poor drunk and usually after a good shag. Many night he had taken some sorry sod or another to bed, never his bed though. The rooms in Hogsmeade worked well enough. He did not think that anyone from the Daily Prophet had gotten wind of how much of a whore he had become and that was all good and dandy. He would not have minded them knowing though. It would not be a paticularly bad thing if the people of the Wizarding Wold did not think of him as this shining light. He truly was not that and he did not aspire for people to think him to be anything that he was not.
"Obviously, I am the only one in a state to talk. You on the otherhand, do not appear to be in an appropriate state to listen. We need to discuss this. I do not mean to be brash, however, the marriage contract needs to be completed soon. We could do so now, as you have no problem with drunken encounters."
Harry was surprised that the professor knew of his activities, but he was slow to anger. He was even a little surprised at what the professor insinuated. He wondered if anyone else beside his partners knew of his scandalous drunken sexcapades. He wondered if the Weasleys knew.
"Geh owrt."
"If that was you feeble attempt to force me to leave, you needn't try so hard. I have no intention of attempting a conversation with a drunk."
Severus quipped. Harry bristled. Always. It was always Snape and the whole damn bloody world judging him. Not even one at a time. They all held him under some ridiculous magnifying glass, expecting him to live up to these impossible standards as though he were perfection. It was frustrating. He wanted to. He wanted to be everything the Wizarding World needed him to be. But he also wanted to be Harry. And Harry wanted to be far removed from the Wizarding World. He watched Snape leave in a swirl of black robes and out of anger, and some other emotion, he tossed the closest thing to him (a book) behind him. He did hate Snape.
At least that is what he told himself. He hated Snape, but he did not hate him as much as he used to. Snape was no different now then he had been before. He was still cold, sarcastic and mean. He still hated him, at least Harry expected him to and he still acted as though he were above the rest of the world. Harry had been mistaken to think that Draco Malfoy had picked up most of his mannerisms from his father- they were obviously from the machinations of his godfather. Annoyed, Harry lowered himself into his chair (the fluffy green armchair that a house elf had conjured for him without him asking).
He leaned his head back, slouching all the way down in the chair. He was alseep almost instantly. Snape pissed him off all the time; this time was nothing unlike the others. But Harry could not help but feel, as he drifted off into his nightmares, that he was somewhat of an embarrassment. Who would really want to be married to a slutbag like him? Closing his eyes he could already hear the shouts of giants and the sound of spells going all over the place. The clunking of his boots on the wood of the Shrieking Shack as he ran toward Severus's prone body on the floor. Dropping to the ground and not caring that he was kneeling in blood as he pulled the older man into his arms and looked into his eyes. As he slept he brushed the wetness off his cheeks.
Snape paced the Headmistress's office furiously. Under any other circumstances he would have felt out of place coming to Minerva about this type of personal thing, but they were talking about the Chosen One after all. He felt that she needed to be involved. And on some level he did consider her a friend. She could have incapacitated him easily, but she did not; allowing him to escape. She had trusted him then, too.
"Severus, he is young and you are not old either. You have to talk about this with him, on multiple occassions."
"I am well aware, Minerva. At the moment, however, I'm certain that he has fallen into an alcohol induced state of unconsciousness."
"He got inebriated. That is not surprising."
"I suppose it is not. He does drink quite a lot."
"He fought a war, Severus. A war that was placed on his shoulders before he could even speak. There is much more to Potter than the fierce lion that he presents himself to be."
"You do mean lion cub, do you not?"
Snape joked and Minerva was surprised that Severus had not lost too much of his sense of humor in such a serious situation. Severus did not let many people know that he had a comedic streak. It would ruin his dungeon bat persona.
"Aye, lion cub. Molly's lion cub now, to be specific. I think she could devour someone who would try to bing harm to him. That would include you Severus."
"I do not know what to do, Minerva. How do I marry an eighteen year old. How do I become a husband. After all these years and Lily. I am in a marriage contract with Lily's son. Potter is probably rolling in his grave at the thought of me..."
Severus could not bring himself to go there. He could not picture himself being intimate with Harry James Potter. He could easily imagine raping the young man-boy because that had nothing to do with his lust or sexual desire. He had never had a sexual attraction to any of his students- Potter included. Even the idea made him cringe. But Mr. Botwright had explained to him that they were getting to a point in time where the marriage contract needed to be fulfilled. There was more at risk here than just their magics. So much more. Snape shook his head. He could not believe that he had ended up in this mess; of all messes to land in.
"Let me ask you this one thing, Seveus. Would you rather be dead? Would it be much better to be dead? Take him and go away, hide from the world for a while. You both are sitting on thousands of galleons at the moment. No one would force you to stay."
"Hmmm. I do not suppose that anyone could force Potter to do anything. I perhaps said something that I maybe should not have."
Seveus admitted. He stopped pacing and flexed his hands. He could attempt to speak with Potter again, but decided that it would be beyond pointless and beneficial to no one if he did. And he was angry. He had propositioned the younger wizard out of anger and nothing more. Of course he knew of Potter's late night activities. The entire staff knew it. Only no one was willing to talk about it or confront Potter about it either.
"Go get some sleep. Perhaps we can have a meeting tomorrow morning to discuss what you and Potter need to do. You might need someone there to stop you from attacking each other."
Minerva winked, leaving Severus and returning up to the sleeping quarters designed for the Headmistress/Headmaster. Knowing that McGonagall was right, Severus took his leave. A slow walk back to the dungeons cleared his head enough for him to fall asleep, but that did not stop him from entering into the nightmare that always swallowed him when he did manage to close his eyes. It was an awful experience and every night he endured it, not willing to risk addiction to some sleep aide or another.
Snape could not get the picture of Potter out of his mind as he slept. The young man had not grown much in the eight years that he knew him. Potter was still short and skinny (a good Seeker's build) and his hair was still all over the place, even more so tonight because of how stupidly drunk he was. Severus noted that his lips had been swollen as well, but he surmised that it could have come from drinking too much Firewhiskey (which can irritate the skin). He was flushed and his entire face was red.
Severus particularly enjoyed seeing Harry's face get redder when he took his jab at the drunken child. And that was the thing. He knew that Harry had suffered through more than even he did as a child. Harry had never been given the chance to be a child, but he still could not help but think of Harry as a child. In his mind he was contracted and bonded with a child. It was easier now to see the similarities between himself and Potter when there was not a Voldemort to get in the way, but he just had to remind himself that he was dealing with an adult. As Severus closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep, he was greeted with the familar tightening in his chest and Potter's bright green, tear filled eyes staring down at him.
Harry awoke with a horridly awful pounding in every inch of his skull. He briefly thought that Voldemort rummaging around in his head was nothing compared to pain that he was in right now. He was happy that the sitting area in his rooms had no windows. He did not think that he could survive windows. They were not pleasant business for hangovers and more so, they meant an unimaginable amount of pain. There was not anything for him to do, at least he did not recall having to do anything. The school was still void of children as there were repairs going on. This year Hogwarrts would open a week late and close a week late. It was a sound plan.
Harry slowly slid out of the chair and down onto the floor and crawled on all fours to his bedroom. There was a window in his bedroom so he shut his eyes as he attempted to make it to his private bathroom. He had hangover potions somewhere in there. He could have called for one of the house elves to help him and pretty reliable about keeping secrets too. To be honest, sometimes Harry enjoyed their company much more than any other wizards company. Somehow he made it to the bathroom and once he had swallowed a bit of the bitter potion he could open his eyes and think clearly.
Snape had been in his rooms last night. Nevermind how he got in, Professor Snape was damn near a genius and he was a spy- he could probably get into anywhere he wanted and no simple charms were going to stop him. Snape had wanted to talk to him. Harry had an idea of about what, but he had no intention of talking last night. He had wanted to blow off some steam, but he just could not even bring himself to start a fight with someone in the Hogs Head- and there were always people still willing to start a fight with the Boy-Who-Lived... even a drunk Boy-Who-Lived. A quick shower had him feeling a lot better and a little less broody about his situation. They had been in this sort of way for the better part of a year. And when he came out, freshly dressed into his sitting room, he was startled to see Minerva's face dancing in green flames in his hearth.
The floo still made him nervous.
"There you are, Mr. Potter. I would like to see you in my office for breakfast. As quick as you can, please."
"Good morning, Headmistress. Is that all?"
Harrry sighed. He had the feeling that Severus had gone to talk to Minerva last night after his drunken and childish display. The book had been properly placed back in the spot it belonged.
"Yes, thank you, Mr. Potter." And with that, she disappeared from the fireplace.
Harry did not know just how much Minerva knew about the situation that he and Professor Snape were in, but he was hoping that she would have a more solid reaction. He did not like the thought of too many people knowing what was going on-especially since he barely knew what was going on. What he did know confused him. The thought of living with Snape, logically made him cringe, but emotionally... He felt calm about the prospect of being away with someone. Sure he wanted to be left alone, but he did not want to be alone.
Harry had never been a fan of being stuck in solitary confinement even if it were self induced. His aunt and uncle had deprived him of so much that he actually needed to be around other human beings. Even if they were as ruthlessly mean as Professor Snape was. It was a quiet and uninteruppted walk up to Headmaster McGonagall's office. He was unsurprised to see Severus already there: drinking tea with a cool and dismissive look on his face. Harry could not help but wonder if the man ever looked nice. The only time he had ever seen him look anything other than moody was when he was unconscious. Then, he looked a bit relaxed.
"You look, well." Snape spoke.
His voice was void of any type of emotion (neither negative nor positive) and Harry took that as a good thing. He was hungry, so maybe he could actually eat without losing his appetite to anger over something that Severus says.
"I am, thank you."
They were being cordial to each other. Harry could only guess that it was something McGonagall put in the tea.
"I suppose you know why you're here, Harry. Tea?'
"Yes, thank you." Harry fixed his tea and looked between Minerva and Severus, waiting for one of them to start. He realized that Severus was not and therefore it was up to him.
"I want to leave. I don't want to be in England. I don't want to be anywhere near England in fact. I want to go somewhere where no one knows who I am."
"I can understand why. But unlike you, Potter, I do not have ties that bind so to speak. The Weaselys, the Order... your friends."
Severus was still speaking calmly. It was surprising fo the both of them. Severus was surprised that he could actually spend several moments with Potter without wanting to hex him into next week. Harry was surprised that Severus could spend several moments with him without wanting to hex him into next week.
"They will have to understand."
"I can not imagine you leaving without saying a word to them about it."
"I make my own decisions." Harry snapped, not liking what Severus was implying.
He realized that he had no reason to be angry. Severus was right, in a way. For a good deal of time he had let Molly and even Hermione make decisions for him. It did feel, for a while, that he was truly apart of their family. The Weasleys would always be family to him, but now he wanted his own family. He did not want to have to explain to everyone in the whole world why. His actions were his own. He hated that he was always under the scruitiny of others.
"Obviously."
Severus sneered and Harry could feel the tension seeping back into the room. He did not want to be a baby and run away again. He was pefectly content to just relax right there in the Headmistress's office and enjoy his scone. If anyone would run away it would be Severus. He refused to be intimidated.
"And we are supposed to simply leave. That is fine with me."
Severus poured himself another cuppa. Harry stared at him as though something had grown out of the side of his head, but quickly adverted his eyes when Severus returned his stare. He wanted to believe that this was really happening, but it all seemed so imaginary. As though this was some sort of joke.
"Why did you crawl to the bathroom to retrieve the potion instead of using your wand?" Snape asked curiously. Harrry felt his entire face flame at the thought of Severus seeing him all hung over and pitiful.
"How did you see that! And what was that you said to me yesterday!"
He asked enraged. Snape's words were not clear last night, but now that he was more awake and actually had food in his system he could get properly pissy about last night. That agument had left him feeling more vulnerable than anything. Talking to Snape made him feel vulnerable. Snape's face did not change from its passivity, but Harry did get the feeling that Severus was laughing at him. Laughing at him and laughing at what he saw.
"I simply stated that the marriage contract needed to be completed soon. And do not think that no one is aware of your late night activities Potter. The entire staff knows that you are rather, I should say, permiscuous."
"And you are an arse!"
"Language, Mr. Potter!"
Minerva attempted to intervene, but Severus and Harry were already standing, only two feet apart looking as though they wanted to strangle each other.
"Name calling, Potter. How mature of you."
"Enough of that, Severus. Sit down and finish your breakfast, Harry. Do not make a mess of my office!"
Minerva said sternly, and with a pointed stare Harry sullenly eturned to his seat. Out of the corner of his eye Harry could swear that he saw Severus smirk.
Severus was rather pleased with himself at being able to get that kind of reaction out of Potter. Sure. Maybe he did not hate him, at least not in the way that he used to. And maybe they could coexist together and with each other, but Potter was as hotheaded as his dogfather. And maybe, Severus thought, one day he might be able to find it endearing. Today was not that day, for today he simply found it to be hilarious. Though he would not reveal his mirth to Potter. He might give the younger wizard a heart attack.
Besides, he wanted to keep his dark and moody persona as long as possible. He liked the thought of Potter thinking that he was one-sided. Harry wondered if it was just that: Severus goading him. The Potions Master had goaded him to anger more times than Harry cared to count, but he did not want things to always be that way. He wanted calm, but he could goad too.
"And I want children. Lots and lots of Potter-Snapes, Professor."
Harry almost lost his tea when he saw the look on Minerva's face.
