Note – My first ever Ryan/Kelly fic. HOLY CRAP. So scared. This kind of picks up after S5E02: Weight Loss. I changed some stuff; it should be clear in the story. Since this is more Ryan/Kelly, I include way more talking heads (for Ryan, particularly) than would otherwise be in the twenty-two minute episode of the show. I can't really figure out if this is totally in character or not. I'm still very much feeling my way through this. This was supposed to be one story, but I had to chop it up because otherwise it would be about 25 pages, and no one needs that. LOL! got rid of the brackets around the action part of the talking heads, so that's awkward.

I Hate This Worm Inside Of Me.

Part I

"But more importantly, what this whole thing is about, this contest is really about being healthy. And in order to be healthy, you have to eat, Kelly."

Even from his seat in the back of the room, Ryan could see the earnest look on Michael's face (even with that god-awful goatee) as he struggled to kneel in front of Kelly. He could see her shoulders stiffen; she clearly hadn't been expecting that kind of personal attention. And personal attention was hardly ever a good thing when it came to Michael, and Ryan should know after suffering for three years as "Hottest in the Office" according to the first Dundee he ever won.

"Kelly. I want you to stand up on your chair. Come on, stand up on your chair."

Ryan squirmed in his seat, trying to get a better look at whatever Michael was doing to Kelly. She looked uncomfortable, but he saw that Michael only had his hand on the armrest of her chair.

"Stand up, stand up, stand up," Michael repeated, hoisting himself up off the floor when Kelly didn't move. "Somebody help her. Here we go."

This was degrading and awful, but he didn't know what to do about it. If Toby was here, he would have interjected on Kelly's behalf (he'd always been oddly protective of her, even though it was common knowledge that he had changed his seat because he couldn't stand her chatter half the time) and then Michael would have called him the devil and they'd have that to listen to for the next five minutes, after which Michael would forget why he was harping on Kelly and go back to doing a really awful Klump imitation.

Holly, the current HR rep, was still a bit too new to know exactly what to do, and shot him a helpless look when Ryan half-glared at her. She was just as confused as he had been during his first few months with Dunder Mifflin Scranton, so he tried not to hold it against her.

Kelly got up and slowly stepped onto the seat of the chair, tottering slightly, and she probably would have fallen if Dwight hadn't raised a hand to her lower back. She looked haggard and weak and drawn, not at all like the vivacious (curvy) Kelly he knew.

She folded her arms over her chest and averted her gaze uncomfortably, looking even smaller in that low-cut jersey dress that now seemed to hang on her whereas before it would cling to her curves in a way that made him want to skim his hands along them as well. He could hardly ever keep his hands off her when she wore those flirty dresses. Back when he was still at the branch, she wore a dress once a week, at most, and much preferred skirts, but now it seemed like she wore more dresses than anything else. He liked the look on her.

But what he didn't like was the look on her face, pained and sad and almost frozen as the rest of them stared up at her. Ryan wanted to be able to do something, to say something, just to make this go away for her, but he'd never been good at that sort of thing.

And Michael was just going to have a ball with this one, he knew it. He'd probably say something about how men liked women with ba-donk-a-donk-donks, or whatever other euphemism he thought was fresh and new but was actually stale and over. He'd say that they were all so used to Kelly's old figure, rounded and full, that this new thinner model just wasn't working. God, he'd probably push Kelly even further toward anorexia or bulimia or whatever it was that caused her to diligently starve herself.

"Okay. I want you to look at her."

Ryan cringed and scooted down in his seat. Oh, no. Here it began.

Michael was dead serious as he looked around the room. Kelly kept her arms folded over her chest and didn't look at anyone.

"She's a beautiful Indian woman."

Ryan's jaw dropped.

To the camera:

Ryan: I was positive I heard wrong. I mean, come on, beautiful Indian woman? I thought for sure I heard wrong.

pause

Wait, I didn't mean it that way. Kelly is a beautiful Indian woman. She is, all right? I just…didn't think I'd hear Michael say something that actually…helped.

frustrated growl

Look, she's beautiful, all right? I do think she's beautiful. You don't spend two years with one woman if you don't – she's gorgeous. All right? I said it. So what?

"She's a beautiful Indian woman." Michael looked around the room, his expression still perfectly stern. "Why? What makes her beautiful?"

Ryan was on his feet before he even knew it. "Everything," he heard himself proclaim as the rest of them turned now to look at him, no doubt wondering what the hell he thought he was doing.

"She's perfect."

The camera focused on Jim all of a sudden, and Ryan had no doubt that he was making one of his patented can-you-believe-he-did-that faces, but he couldn't have cared less. And just like that, the camera was on Kelly, who actually lifted her gaze and met his directly for the first time.

His breath caught in his throat as she looked at him, unsure and surprised, but he caught just the barest glimmer of delight, and that made the corner of his mouth quirk up in one of those small, private smiles that he belatedly realized he reserved just for her.

Meredith ruined the moment.

"I like her nails."

Michael ruined it further.

"OK, be more specific."

"I like her fingernails."

"I like her purple dress," Phyllis spoke up, making Ryan roll his eyes. That wasn't purple. It was dark amaranth or merlot if anything.

(Oh, God, he knew the names of different shades of pink…)

"What about her looks?" Michael asked, ruining his otherwise not-too-bad record for the meeting. No longer the focus of attention, Ryan slowly lowered himself into his seat.

Creed arched a brow. "Hell of an ass."

To the camera:

Ryan purses his lips; gives the camera a look.

Kelly picked at her nails and looked around, and Ryan felt forgotten. "…What else do people like?"

Michael didn't give anyone a chance to reply to that and took a step closer to her. His green eyes searched hers beseechingly. "Kelly, will you just agree to stop this mess and stop trying to kill yourself?"

His eyes trailed along the stiff line of her shoulders as Ryan waited rigidly, hoping that she would agree, hoping that she would see sense and listen to Michael.

Finally, he heard a quaking gasp and saw her shoulders tremble.

"I hate dieting," she got out, looking as if she was trying to curl into herself. "I hate it so much. I hate this worm inside of me!"

He saw the cameras go directly to Creed, who looked very suspicious all of a sudden, but Ryan didn't know what to make of it. He also didn't even want to try to figure out what Kelly meant when she said she had a worm inside of her.

"I want you to know. Kelly, look at me!" Michael took her hand and turned her around, forcing her to meet his gaze. "I want you to know that you are beautiful. You are truly beautiful. Give me a hug."

Ryan was with him up until that point, up until the point Michael wrapped his arms around Kelly's waist and rested his head against her breasts.

"Mmm…."

Kelly looked at the camera, and Bill the camera guy shrugged.

…Then zoomed in.

To the camera:

Ryan: arches a brow; does not look amused Really? Really?

Coming Up: When Michael reinstates the Weight Loss Challenge, all the progress with Kelly goes out the window, and she's back to her crazy dieting...