Cordelia grinned at her fellow cheerleaders; they looked exhausted. "Good job, girls," she said.
Harmony grimaced back, which made Cordelia smile wider.
"Don't worry, I'm sure you'll develop some stamina over the season. You can't all be in a good of shape as I am," Cordelia said to Harmony, patting her shoulder.
Once Harmony had nodded in agreement and looked away, Cordelia turned her attention the short and rather unattractive woman standing in front of them, watching several boys do handstands.
"You know," Cordelia said to Harmony, "It doesn't make sense have everyone try out again, regardless of who was on last year's team"
"Coach said we all had to," explained Harmony.
"I know that," Cordelia replied in a derisive tone. "But there's no point in making us stand out in the sun, leaping and shouting and drinking so much water I'm going be bloated for days"
Harmony shrugged in response. "She's new; she wants to start fresh"
"I know that too, Harmony. Some of us remember conversations we had ten minutes ago. It's still stupid"
"Well, don't let her hear you say that if you want to be head cheerleader"
"I don't need to be head cheerleader this year," said Cordelia. "No matter how hot or popular, freshman are always on the bottom of the pecking order, but this year, I'm a sophomore, and sophomores can be on top of the social order just as easily as seniors"
"You don't want to be head cheerleader?" Harmony asked, stupified.
"Of course I do. But I'm going to be Homecoming Queen, and May Queen,and Prom Queen. I don't need to be head cheerleader, too. But it would be nice," she said wistfully.
Coach interrupted Cordelia's musings by yelling, "Let's take it from the top again."
Cordelia was momentarily confused, but a quick glance at Harmony reminded her of what they were doing. She swung her hips in unison with 37 other girls, shook her arms, and shouted something inane about beating the other team.
During a momentary break, while Coach showed an unattractive redhead the steps again, Cordelia whispered to Harmony, "Of course, I'm a shoe-in for the team, so I'll probably be head cheerleader anyway"
Harmony was too busy going through the steps to answer. Since Harmony was ignoring her, Cordelia spent the time practicing her smile-and-wave.
It took 45 interminable minutes for everyone to remember the routine Ñ which was mind-bogglingly simple, and almost identical to the standard touchdown routine from the year before Ñ and Cordelia had to stop herself from bitching out a few of the stupider girls. But that wouldn't look good in front of Coach, so she kept smiling.
Once all 37 girls trying out were able to run through it without any major mistakes, Coach called them up in groups of three to do it in front of everyone.
While the first group was going through their routine, Cordelia said absently to the people sitting around her, "They're not bad, but they'd take an awful lot of work to be presentable in public"
She was in next group, along with Harmony and a random freshman whose name wasn't worth learning. They were, if Cordelia thought so herself, flawless. She flashed her sparkling smile at the Coach, whose face momentarily lost it's pinched look in favor of an outright scowl. Flouncing back to her place on the field, Cordelia shot the knot of senior girls a challenging look. Almost all of them looked away, but one, a brunette with an obvious boob job, glared at Cordelia.
She spent the time waiting for the routines to finish flirting with two of the male cheerleaders from the previous year. Look available, but never be available was Cordelia's motto, and so far it was working great. She hadn't stayed home once all freshman year, and she also never got stuck with a boyfriend. Of course, she'd never date a cheerlearder--what kind of boy was on the cheerleading team?--but they didn't have to know that. And it was cute the little looks they kept giving each other when she would accidently adjust her bra.
"Line up by hight, now, girls," called Coach, interrupting Cordelia's cute story about her trip to Maui the previous December.
"I'll be a spotter, Coach," Cordelia offered. Coach shook her head, and Cordelia reluctantly took her place in the line, disturbingly far from the short end of the line.
"All right, girls," Coach said to Cordelia's end of the line, "you're the first layer." There was only one girl trying out who was taller than Cordelia, so she was in the middle of the first six-person pyramid. In short order, there were two knees digging into her back, and a very wobbly Ashleigh Portrucci pushing down on all of them.
"Good, good," Coach said, just as Ashleigh finally tumbled down. Ashleigh lay sprawled on her back, panting, and Cordelia scowled at her.
Coach said, "That was good. Let's try another one, with Tiffany on top"
Cordelia put her hands on her hips. "I hate being on the bottom of the pyramid"
"You're too tall to be on top," Coach said implacably.
"Yes, but," Cordelia objected.
"Get into position"
Cordelia frowned and knelt again. "This is so humiliating," she mumbled. No one answered.
After their second pyramid had failed as spectacularly as the first, Cordelia's group was allowed to watch the rest of the prospectives try to do better.
Long after Cordelia had become bored out of her mind, Coach announced the part Cordelia was really dreading. "All right, people, now we're going to try a few simple lifts"
She called out the names to gather in groups, and "Chase" got lumped with "Carter," "Burnam," "Buckley," and "Burdt."
Before any of the rest of the group could speak, Cordelia told "Burnam," "Josh, you and Robbie are the lifters. Libby and I will spot, and Mitzi is going to be our liftee"
"Oh, no, Cordelia. I'm afraid of heights," said Mitzi, hiding behind her hair.
Cordelia glared at Mitzi.
"I'll do it," said Libby brightly.
"But--" Cordelia objected, but Josh interrupted.
"Okay, Libs, Robbie and I are going to hold you like this," he said, and he put his hands on her thighs, under the practice skirt she was wearing. Libby giggled, Mitzi blushed, and Cordelia glowered.
"Fine," she said shortly, and stood behind Robbie, her hands up to spot Libby. Mitzi stood behind Josh.
Robbie took Libby's other leg, put it on his own thigh, and said, "One, Two, Three." On three, Libby leapt up and balanced for one single perfect moment. Then she came crashing down. Libby's foot slipped. Robbie let go and fell backward. Both of them came crashing down on Cordelia.
"You need to lose some weight, Libby," Cordelia said tightly. Libby was too enmeshed in Robbie's crotch to respond.
Two hours later, Cordelia slumped down on the grass, head hanging. She pulled at her top, which was soaked with sweat. The field was more crowded now, as people had started showing up near the of the tryouts to watch and support their friends.
Cordelia stared blankly at the football players on the next field over, grunting and shouting. Next to her, two senior girls were talking.
"Are you going to the Sigma Kap party?" one asked.
"Yeah, of course," the other one responded. "They have the best summer party. All the guys come back to school for the weekend, and they get a DJ, and I heard last year, the entire sophomore class lost their virginity together"
Cordelia rolled her eyes at finding that an enticing prospect--losing your virginity with half a dozen other cheerleaders watching--although it did explain a lot about the current crop of junior cheerleaders.
"You're going to come over and do my hair, right?" the first one asked.
"Oh course! Are you going to wear your red skirt"
"Oh, that's a good idea"
Cordelia tuned out the rest of the conversation. Instead she searched out Harmony. She was talking earnestly with a gawky junior boy Ñ he'd dropped all three girls he'd had to lift, and he couldn't figure out the clapping routine. Also, Cordelia was pretty sure he had a girlfriend already. Cordelia pulled up her aching body and strode over to the pair.
"Harmony," she said, and without waiting for an answer, continued, "We need to go shopping right now. We have plans for tonight, and I don't have anything to wear"
"We do?" Harmony asked.
"Yes, we do"
Harmony followed obediently, and once they were out of earshot, Cordelia explained. "We're going to the Sigma Kap summer party"
"Really?" Harmony interrupted happily. "Because that's the party of the summer. How are we going to get in? What are we going to wear"
Cordelia suppressed the urge to whap Harmony on the back of the head. "That's why we're going shopping. It's my first college party, and I need to make a statement"
"Right," said Harmony. "What kind of statement"
Cordelia paused at the edge of the field and looked back at the crowds still sitting on the lawn. None of them had noticed her leaving. "This year," Cordelia said, "is the beginning of the rest of my life."