You'd be surprised what sudden inspiration will come to you at 2:51 in the morning. But with nothing better to do and being wired like crazy, you try to make the most of your time.
Don't have all the specs yet, but I think this stuff is gonna be PG-13. As for a plot base, starts off on episode 12 right after Shinji kills the angel Sahaqiel, y'know, the one that tries to use itself to bomb NERV. Don't know how far it's going to go. Input CAN (not WILL) change what happens.
DISCLAIMER: Now if I really owned this thing, it would have turned out something more like this, ('cause he's a sucker for romance)
iThoughti
"speech"
NOTE: 2nd Edit. Thanks for all reviews that helped with some of my mistakes. Does anyone know why I need 9 periods to display an elipsey? Or how to turn text to an Italic or Bold font?
-=NERV Headquarters=-
"Is the pilot of Unit 01 currently available?"
"Yes sir, he's right here."
"Sir?"
"I just read over the report. Good work, Shinji."
"........."
-=Ramen Noodle Stand=-
"Well here you are, Not only is it a place that serves a vegetarian dish for Wondergirl," began Auska, smugly, "but it shouldn't be too hard on that small wallet of yours either, Misato"
"Well I feel blessed by your consideration, Auska," replied Misato with a nervous smile.
iEven still, its only Monday, and treating four to dinner, even at this place, means that I'm broke until Friday.........i
"We'll take 2 pork, 1 vegetarian and a shark fin."
Most of the meal was eaten in silence, as it seemed that most of the children and their guardian were famished. They felt at ease, eating at such a quant, and simple place, knowing that it would most likely be weeks before the next angel attack. A great kind of atmosphere to bask in when the possibility of destruction, for the post-apocalyptic civilization, was possible at any time.
While Auska and Misato were gulping down their well-deserved dinners, Rei ate quietly, her silence and solace shared only by Shinji. He slowly stirred the remains of his soup, still pondering the words of his cold and cynical father.
i"Good work, Shinji"i
He had never heard his father utter these words, at least not to him. Although there was no kind of emotion detectible in his voice, he could have sworn he heard a note of pride. The idea of his father being proud of him, it filled Shinji with hope, like a helium tank filling a balloon.
i"Good work, Shinji"i
"Misato?"
"Yesh, Shinshi?" Said Misato as she slurped noodles.
"Before, some time ago, you asked me why I piloted EVA. Do you remember?"
"Yesh," -GULP-
Auska shifted her attention from her soup bowl to Shinji. Rei simply kept eating, her emotionless mask, unchanged.
"Well I think that I figured out why. I think I do it just to hear my father say that."
Misato simply nodded her head and continued eating.
"Wait a minute, you're telling me that's your reason? Just to get the attention of the commander?"
"Yea."
"Sounds like a pretty stupid reason to me."
At those words, Shinji felt a hole puncture his balloon of hope, slowly deflating him.
"I fight to protect the world, in hopes of a better future," proclaimed Auska, her ego rising even further.
"Wow, Auska, what a great answer, if you were trying out for this Miss Tokyo pageant. C'mon now, what do you really fight for?" queered Misato as she popped the top on a fresh can of Yebisu.
"Humph, if you don't believe my first answer, then you can believe whatever you want. I don't suppose you'll tell me why you work for NERV. I know it's not for the money, I've seen your paychecks."
"Not until you tell me why you pilot for NERV."
"Whatever. What about you, Wondergirl?"
"I fight because the commander orders me to," replied Rei in her normal, monotone voice.
"Just for the Commander huh? Well doesn't he have a loving set of dolls."
"Neither I nor pilot Ikari are dol........."
"Yea, Yea, I've heard it. Go back to your soup."
Now Shinji couldn't get Auska's ideas out of his head. Was he being na•ve, just playing along with his fathers wishes, like a pawn in a giant chess set?
iAm I just some tool, like another limb, or some kind of plaything like a.........doll?i
He slowly began to lower his chin onto the bar, weighing the ideas against each other. Sadly, it seemed that Auska's were not only the most likely, but also the most logical. He sighed heavily, his hopes still diminishing. Being ignored by Auska and Misato didn't help as they continued to debate their reasons for being at NERV. He felt isolated and alone, as if no one cared about his thoughts or well being.
"Is something the matter, pilot Ikari?" Shinji slowly turned his halfhearted gaze to Rei, perhaps the last person he thought whose attention would be gained by his sullen look.
"Sorta, I'm just kind of depressed, that's all."
"I see."
There was a long silence between them, the constant ramblings of the pilot and the major still in the background.
"May I inquire why you feel depressed?" Rei asked, still dry.
"Well.........It's just that I feel.........so.........." Shinji shifted his gaze back into space, trying to determine what he would say.
"Alone.........Ignored.........Disrespected." He closed his eyes as he said this, half wishing that he said nothing at all. He was waiting for a response from Rei, any kind. Whether she continued to eat her soup or if she would come up with any other questions.
For a long while, there was silence between them.
Shinji reopened his eyes, to see what Rei was doing. It looked as though she was still pondering his response, her eyes simply staring off into space.
"Do you understand what I'm saying?"
"I believe so. Does this mean that you seek attention?"
iDo I? Perhaps, but that doesn't sound right.........i
"More like acknowledgement."
"Explain." It was more of an order than a request.
"I wish to be seen by others as an equal, not as one of lower status. Though I feel as though I am doing my best, no one else seems to think so. They all seem to want more."
He paused, carefully choosing his next words.
"That's why today, when I heard fa......... the commander say 'good work' I felt as though... he were proud of me. But now I doubt even that after what Auska said."
Shinji proceeded to lay his head in his arms on the counter. Staring off into space at the various contents in the back of the stand.
Another pause.
"I see."
Shinji felt more as though he was talking to a mirror than an actual person.
iNo, I can't think of her that way. She's a living, breathing, human being, and she deserves some respect. If she just expressed some opinions for.........i
Shinji, quite suddenly, picked his head off the table and did something that he felt was very spur of the moment.
"Ayanami?"
"Yes?"
"Can I ask how you are feeling right now?"
This caught the red-eyed girl off guard. She briefly broke her stone mask expression and felt herself blush a little bit. She had not expected Shinji to repeat her same question back to her. Worse, she did not know how to respond.
"Ayanami? If you're uncomfortable answering, you don't have too........."
"I am sorry, that was just a little unexpected.
"Oh, I'm sorry."
There was another pause as Rei slid into deep thought.
"I've never been asked that question before in the way that you have stated it."
iShe's never been asked how she's feeling!?! No wonder she never expresses an opinion.i
"I do not think I can answer right now."
"Do you need time to sort out how you feel?"
"Perhaps. Something like that."
"I see."
There was a long silence between them. The only noises in existence were the soup being devoured behind them and the low hum of the heat lamps from the noodle carts. Shinji turned his gaze from his empty soup bowl to the girl beside him. Her demeanor seemed to be confused and befuddled as she herself stared at her empty soup bowl. Her face had more color than normal, but the major change was her eyes. They were wider than they normally were, only slightly, but it seemed like a noticeable change from all the other times he had seen her. They seemed mystified and the soul piercing effect upon Shinji had been replaced with a sort of soft glaze.........
.........As they stared right at him.
"Ga-Gomen-nasi!"
"Why are you apologizing?"
"I was starring at you and-"
"Is their some reason why you should not?"
"Some people would find it to be offensive."
"I do not understand why."
There was another long silence
"Neither do I........."
With that, Shinji once again started at Rei, very blatantly. Rei did the same, she affixed on Shinji's blue eyes.
Silence again. Asuka was arguing with a slightly tipsy Misato. Their first debate had either kept going are led off in some other direction. It was of no real concern to Shinji anymore.
"Pilot Ikari?"
Shinji's gaze wavered.
"Yes Ayanami?"
"Do you still wish to inquire as to how I feel? I believe I know now."
"Um, If you don't mind, sure."
"I believe I can most accurately describe my feelings as a sense of confusion. Yet I also feel as though there is more to it, but I am unable to accurately describe those feelings."
Shinji blinked, feeling a bit confused himself.
Rei appeared to be unnerved somewhat still, as her face had not returned to its previous, cold demeanor. Her features seemed softer. It looked as though she were trying to work her way through some complex problem.
"Um Ayanami-san, if you would like, I'd be..........well.........." Shinji gulped, he was somewhat scared of what he was going to say next. ".........If.........If you'd like, I could try to help you to understand how you're feeling."
"Pilot Ikari?"
"Tomorrow, are you doing anything tomorrow?"
"Because there are no sync test or school assigned for tomorrow, I have no agenda to attend to."
"If you are interested, that is........."
Inside, Shinji was screaming at himself.
".........."
Rei quietly pondered his words. Just a little while ago, Shinji had given what seemed to be an accurate sense of his feelings, one that was better than her own attempt. He seemed to have an accurate understanding on emotions.
"Very well, tomorrow then."
"I'll come by your place," his words came out quickly, "sometime around noon?"
"Very well."
"What are you two babbling about?"
It was Asuka. She and Misato were standing up and returning to the car.
-=Ayanami's apartment door=-
Auska had been impatient and said to drop Wondergirl off on the front steps of her apartment. Though Shinji had wanted to walk her in, he knew that it would not be a good idea to cross Auska.
"So tomorrow then?"
"Yes"
"Alright, see ya then."
"Goodbye."
The car sped down the street and made a sharp left. Ayanami stood on her doorstep as she watched the lights on Captain Katsuragi's car fade off into the distance.
-=Misato's Car=-
"Tomorrow then? What did you do baka Shinji, get a date?" Asuka looked smugly into the back seat where Shinji went from distraught to defensive on the fly.
"What!?! What are you saying Asuka?"
"What do you see in a doll like that Shinji?"
"Ayanami is bNOTb a doll!"
"Jeez, sorry."
Shinji stared out the window as Misato drew ever closer to their residence.
-As always, all responses are appreciated-
NOTE: 3nd Edit. Thanks for all reviews that helped with some of my mistakes. Special thanks to Dan for all the advice on the story and help with the tags.
Don't have all the specs yet, but I think this stuff is gonna be PG-13. As for a plot base, starts off on episode 12 right after Shinji kills the angel Sahaqiel, y'know, the one that tries to use itself to bomb NERV. Don't know how far it's going to go. Input CAN (not WILL) change what happens.
DISCLAIMER: Now if I really owned this thing, it would have turned out something more like this, ('cause he's a sucker for romance)
iThoughti
"speech"
NOTE: 2nd Edit. Thanks for all reviews that helped with some of my mistakes. Does anyone know why I need 9 periods to display an elipsey? Or how to turn text to an Italic or Bold font?
-=NERV Headquarters=-
"Is the pilot of Unit 01 currently available?"
"Yes sir, he's right here."
"Sir?"
"I just read over the report. Good work, Shinji."
"........."
-=Ramen Noodle Stand=-
"Well here you are, Not only is it a place that serves a vegetarian dish for Wondergirl," began Auska, smugly, "but it shouldn't be too hard on that small wallet of yours either, Misato"
"Well I feel blessed by your consideration, Auska," replied Misato with a nervous smile.
iEven still, its only Monday, and treating four to dinner, even at this place, means that I'm broke until Friday.........i
"We'll take 2 pork, 1 vegetarian and a shark fin."
Most of the meal was eaten in silence, as it seemed that most of the children and their guardian were famished. They felt at ease, eating at such a quant, and simple place, knowing that it would most likely be weeks before the next angel attack. A great kind of atmosphere to bask in when the possibility of destruction, for the post-apocalyptic civilization, was possible at any time.
While Auska and Misato were gulping down their well-deserved dinners, Rei ate quietly, her silence and solace shared only by Shinji. He slowly stirred the remains of his soup, still pondering the words of his cold and cynical father.
i"Good work, Shinji"i
He had never heard his father utter these words, at least not to him. Although there was no kind of emotion detectible in his voice, he could have sworn he heard a note of pride. The idea of his father being proud of him, it filled Shinji with hope, like a helium tank filling a balloon.
i"Good work, Shinji"i
"Misato?"
"Yesh, Shinshi?" Said Misato as she slurped noodles.
"Before, some time ago, you asked me why I piloted EVA. Do you remember?"
"Yesh," -GULP-
Auska shifted her attention from her soup bowl to Shinji. Rei simply kept eating, her emotionless mask, unchanged.
"Well I think that I figured out why. I think I do it just to hear my father say that."
Misato simply nodded her head and continued eating.
"Wait a minute, you're telling me that's your reason? Just to get the attention of the commander?"
"Yea."
"Sounds like a pretty stupid reason to me."
At those words, Shinji felt a hole puncture his balloon of hope, slowly deflating him.
"I fight to protect the world, in hopes of a better future," proclaimed Auska, her ego rising even further.
"Wow, Auska, what a great answer, if you were trying out for this Miss Tokyo pageant. C'mon now, what do you really fight for?" queered Misato as she popped the top on a fresh can of Yebisu.
"Humph, if you don't believe my first answer, then you can believe whatever you want. I don't suppose you'll tell me why you work for NERV. I know it's not for the money, I've seen your paychecks."
"Not until you tell me why you pilot for NERV."
"Whatever. What about you, Wondergirl?"
"I fight because the commander orders me to," replied Rei in her normal, monotone voice.
"Just for the Commander huh? Well doesn't he have a loving set of dolls."
"Neither I nor pilot Ikari are dol........."
"Yea, Yea, I've heard it. Go back to your soup."
Now Shinji couldn't get Auska's ideas out of his head. Was he being na•ve, just playing along with his fathers wishes, like a pawn in a giant chess set?
iAm I just some tool, like another limb, or some kind of plaything like a.........doll?i
He slowly began to lower his chin onto the bar, weighing the ideas against each other. Sadly, it seemed that Auska's were not only the most likely, but also the most logical. He sighed heavily, his hopes still diminishing. Being ignored by Auska and Misato didn't help as they continued to debate their reasons for being at NERV. He felt isolated and alone, as if no one cared about his thoughts or well being.
"Is something the matter, pilot Ikari?" Shinji slowly turned his halfhearted gaze to Rei, perhaps the last person he thought whose attention would be gained by his sullen look.
"Sorta, I'm just kind of depressed, that's all."
"I see."
There was a long silence between them, the constant ramblings of the pilot and the major still in the background.
"May I inquire why you feel depressed?" Rei asked, still dry.
"Well.........It's just that I feel.........so.........." Shinji shifted his gaze back into space, trying to determine what he would say.
"Alone.........Ignored.........Disrespected." He closed his eyes as he said this, half wishing that he said nothing at all. He was waiting for a response from Rei, any kind. Whether she continued to eat her soup or if she would come up with any other questions.
For a long while, there was silence between them.
Shinji reopened his eyes, to see what Rei was doing. It looked as though she was still pondering his response, her eyes simply staring off into space.
"Do you understand what I'm saying?"
"I believe so. Does this mean that you seek attention?"
iDo I? Perhaps, but that doesn't sound right.........i
"More like acknowledgement."
"Explain." It was more of an order than a request.
"I wish to be seen by others as an equal, not as one of lower status. Though I feel as though I am doing my best, no one else seems to think so. They all seem to want more."
He paused, carefully choosing his next words.
"That's why today, when I heard fa......... the commander say 'good work' I felt as though... he were proud of me. But now I doubt even that after what Auska said."
Shinji proceeded to lay his head in his arms on the counter. Staring off into space at the various contents in the back of the stand.
Another pause.
"I see."
Shinji felt more as though he was talking to a mirror than an actual person.
iNo, I can't think of her that way. She's a living, breathing, human being, and she deserves some respect. If she just expressed some opinions for.........i
Shinji, quite suddenly, picked his head off the table and did something that he felt was very spur of the moment.
"Ayanami?"
"Yes?"
"Can I ask how you are feeling right now?"
This caught the red-eyed girl off guard. She briefly broke her stone mask expression and felt herself blush a little bit. She had not expected Shinji to repeat her same question back to her. Worse, she did not know how to respond.
"Ayanami? If you're uncomfortable answering, you don't have too........."
"I am sorry, that was just a little unexpected.
"Oh, I'm sorry."
There was another pause as Rei slid into deep thought.
"I've never been asked that question before in the way that you have stated it."
iShe's never been asked how she's feeling!?! No wonder she never expresses an opinion.i
"I do not think I can answer right now."
"Do you need time to sort out how you feel?"
"Perhaps. Something like that."
"I see."
There was a long silence between them. The only noises in existence were the soup being devoured behind them and the low hum of the heat lamps from the noodle carts. Shinji turned his gaze from his empty soup bowl to the girl beside him. Her demeanor seemed to be confused and befuddled as she herself stared at her empty soup bowl. Her face had more color than normal, but the major change was her eyes. They were wider than they normally were, only slightly, but it seemed like a noticeable change from all the other times he had seen her. They seemed mystified and the soul piercing effect upon Shinji had been replaced with a sort of soft glaze.........
.........As they stared right at him.
"Ga-Gomen-nasi!"
"Why are you apologizing?"
"I was starring at you and-"
"Is their some reason why you should not?"
"Some people would find it to be offensive."
"I do not understand why."
There was another long silence
"Neither do I........."
With that, Shinji once again started at Rei, very blatantly. Rei did the same, she affixed on Shinji's blue eyes.
Silence again. Asuka was arguing with a slightly tipsy Misato. Their first debate had either kept going are led off in some other direction. It was of no real concern to Shinji anymore.
"Pilot Ikari?"
Shinji's gaze wavered.
"Yes Ayanami?"
"Do you still wish to inquire as to how I feel? I believe I know now."
"Um, If you don't mind, sure."
"I believe I can most accurately describe my feelings as a sense of confusion. Yet I also feel as though there is more to it, but I am unable to accurately describe those feelings."
Shinji blinked, feeling a bit confused himself.
Rei appeared to be unnerved somewhat still, as her face had not returned to its previous, cold demeanor. Her features seemed softer. It looked as though she were trying to work her way through some complex problem.
"Um Ayanami-san, if you would like, I'd be..........well.........." Shinji gulped, he was somewhat scared of what he was going to say next. ".........If.........If you'd like, I could try to help you to understand how you're feeling."
"Pilot Ikari?"
"Tomorrow, are you doing anything tomorrow?"
"Because there are no sync test or school assigned for tomorrow, I have no agenda to attend to."
"If you are interested, that is........."
Inside, Shinji was screaming at himself.
".........."
Rei quietly pondered his words. Just a little while ago, Shinji had given what seemed to be an accurate sense of his feelings, one that was better than her own attempt. He seemed to have an accurate understanding on emotions.
"Very well, tomorrow then."
"I'll come by your place," his words came out quickly, "sometime around noon?"
"Very well."
"What are you two babbling about?"
It was Asuka. She and Misato were standing up and returning to the car.
-=Ayanami's apartment door=-
Auska had been impatient and said to drop Wondergirl off on the front steps of her apartment. Though Shinji had wanted to walk her in, he knew that it would not be a good idea to cross Auska.
"So tomorrow then?"
"Yes"
"Alright, see ya then."
"Goodbye."
The car sped down the street and made a sharp left. Ayanami stood on her doorstep as she watched the lights on Captain Katsuragi's car fade off into the distance.
-=Misato's Car=-
"Tomorrow then? What did you do baka Shinji, get a date?" Asuka looked smugly into the back seat where Shinji went from distraught to defensive on the fly.
"What!?! What are you saying Asuka?"
"What do you see in a doll like that Shinji?"
"Ayanami is bNOTb a doll!"
"Jeez, sorry."
Shinji stared out the window as Misato drew ever closer to their residence.
-As always, all responses are appreciated-
NOTE: 3nd Edit. Thanks for all reviews that helped with some of my mistakes. Special thanks to Dan for all the advice on the story and help with the tags.