Summary: Alex discovers the truth about her past – and her twin sister. The resulting trip takes the Russos to Malibu. WoWPxHM crossover, but mainly WoWP cast. Jalex and possibly Loliver.
Important, Please Read: This fic is written mostly in Alex's POV, although the HM scenes are most likely third person. The beginning of the fic is just my version of a plot-twist in "Potion Commotion".
I glanced out the window. The Great Wall of China. I stole a glance at the couch. Justin's obese teacher, Mr. Laritate was sitting there, discussing the importance of some random Nevada neckband with Brad. Of course, I'd probably be drooling all over Brad if the situation was normal, but the Great Wall of China was outside the window, and the front gate of the Forbidden City was just outside the door. I hadn't any time to fathom the reason of this geographic disorder, since two non-wizard folks just got transported to China because Max craved Chinese food!
You see, Max is undergoing a kind of "wizard puberty", a time in which he can't control his powers. For that reason, we put "the hat" on his head in order to control my powers. Unfortunately, I was stupid enough to swallow both sides of a love potion, causing my head to swell irregularly. Two people who can't control their magic. One hat. You understand our situation now?
While I was wearing the hat to keep my head normal-sized, Max hiccupped us to China. Apparently, half of our apartment was in Beijing, while the other half was in the mountains, near the Great Wall. That's some powerful magic there…but if either Mr. Laritate or Brad decides to leave…we're doomed.
Suddenly, two Chinese men wearing white aprons, each pulling a cart piled high with Chinese food, walked in smiling. Max, being the idiotic boy he is, jumped up and immediately grabbed some egg rolls. I noticed that a third man also came in, and began speaking Chinese to dad.
"No, I don't understand what you're saying," Dad tried to tell the man. The man profusely refused to listen, and began speaking again, waving his hands wildly.
"Can you speak English? English?" Dad asked.
"Hing-ge-leesh," The man said.
"No. No. Can you speak English?" Dad asked again, this time stressing the word "speak".
"Oh! Speak English! I understand now," He said, slapping his thigh. This surprised everyone in the room.
"What? When you're fluent in 600 languages, it's a little difficult to go through each language to analyze what someone else is speaking!"
Mr Laritate decided to speak up, "I'm a World History teacher, and their aren't 600 human languages around to learn."
The man laughed again. "I know! I can speak monkey, dolphin, dog…oh, and the tricky high-pitched shrill that the gnome fairies from Goldfurm speak!" The man promptly began to speak gibberish in a shrilly voice.
"Stop that! And…what fairy language?" Brad asked. Dad immediately shushed the man.
"Shh!" Dad whispered, "They aren't magical!"
"I know," The man whispered back. "My governmental job is to help idiots like you who accidentally performed magic, but can't reverse it because of non-wizard presence!"
"Then –"
The man began laughing again for no reason, causing all eyes to turn to him. He looked around the room. "What? We're in Hawaii now!" He turned to Dad and whispered something about laughing uncontrollably every time he teleports. Suddenly, a group of hula dancers dance into the apartment. Apparently, we just teleported to Hawaii. Great.
"No problem," the man said. He immediately began laughing uncontrollably again.
Mr. Laritate stood up. "Well, I'm sick of that man laughing his head off all the time!" He yanked off that Nevada necktie Brad was wearing and stomped towards the door. Brad followed suit. Uh-oh.
Mr. Laritate yanked open the door and stepped into our hallway and walked out of sight. The odd man looked at our strange looks.
"What? I said I laugh uncontrollably every time I teleport…and I just teleported you out of this mess!" He promptly snatched the hat and placed it back onto Max's head, which was covered in soy sauce. My head grew big again.
Just as dad was about to give me the yelling of the century, however, the odd man spoke up. "You know, you still need to sign the adoption papers. She's 14 now, and you know the wizard law."
Dad waved his head around. "Yes, I know the wizard law."
"What wizard law?" I asked.
"There is no wizard law," Dad said.
"B-but you just said-"
"Shh…I'm talking to this guy right now."
As Dad and the odd man were discussing, I was wondering. That guy said she's 14, obviously me, because I'm the only 14-year-old female in the room. The man also mentioned something about adoption papers and wizard law. I looked at Justin, who seemed to be avoiding my eye. I walked over and sat down next to him. He directed his eyes towards the carpet.
"Justin, what's wrong? Whenever you try to hide something from me, you avoid eye contact."
Justin lightly pushed Alex's hands away. "It's nothing. You'll find out soon enough."
Of course, soon enough wouldn't come until after dinner. Dad pulled me away to have a "private talk" with him. Uh-oh. The last thing I heard was Max asking the odd man to shrill in that gnome fairy language again.
We were in the lair. Dad told me to sit while he went and collected a pile of paper.
"What is it, dad?" I asked him.
"Well, there's this "taboo" that happens to people if a non-wizard marries a wizard, and vice versa. It was supposed to prevent them from giving birth, but the idiot screwed up and made it possible for non-wizard/wizard couples to only have boys."
Suddenly, the words "adoption" dawned on me.
"After we had Justin, Theresa and I decided that we wanted to raise a girl. So we went to the wizard adoption center and picked up a girl!"
I tried to stall, imposing self-censorship upon myself in hopes of not being an adopted child. My life is going to be dramatically different after this. "So, dad. Why are you telling me this?"
Dad stopped talking and looked at me confusedly. Yes! I successfully stalled his speech. "Alex, stop stalling!" Ok…maybe not.
"Anyway, we named the little girl Alex."
I sighed. Knew it. "Why didn't you tell me?"
Dad, or I should say Jerry, said "We wanted you to feel like you were part of the family!"
I sighed again. "But now, after feeling like part of the family for so long, I feel separated from all of you!"
"Oh, come on, now! Justin knew that you weren't a Russo, but still treated you like a sister!"
"Justin? He knew?" I asked.
"Yeah, he's the oldest son. Of course he knew. Max doesn't, though." Jerry looked at me and saw my sad expression. "Hey, look at the bright side! You don't have to compete against Max and Justin to keep your powers!"
I instantly brightened up. "Really?" I asked.
Jerry smiled. "Yep. Although you do have a twin sister…"
"What? I have a twin sister?"
Jerry nodded. "She lives in Malibu, and we're going to visit her in a couple days."
"Why the sudden notice?" I asked.
"Well," Jerry explained, "That man outside just asked for the adoption papers. According to wizard law, when the "adoptee" turns 14, he or she gets to meet his or her real family at least once, and decide if he or she wants to stay or go and live with their original family. I need to have the original parents and you to sign the papers in order to get out of this mess. I thought I could get out of it…but apparently now."
"Wow, dad, trying to break the law, eh?"
"Uh," he grunted in reply.
"You know, Dad, I always imagined California to be more sunny, you know?" I commented on San Francisco's cloudy and quite dismal sky.
"It's in the middle of the winter," Jerry replied. "California isn't sunny all year round."
Theresa sighed, "I really want to get the Golden Gate bridge pencil sharpener for my collection!"
"We don't have time," Jerry said. "We have to hurry or we'll miss the connecting flight to Malibu!"
Suddenly, a familiar-looking Chinese man ran by, screaming. A couple people wearing "security" vests were chasing him down the hallway.
"Hey, isn't that the guy – the wizard government dude?" I pointed out.
Justin replied. "Yeah. He said he'd keep a close eye on us, and that we would never notice his presence. Apparently not…"
Suddenly, the man appeared with a flash of light. "I don't understand the way of these non-wizard forms of transportation," he panted. "Wouldn't it be easier if you just teleported?"
"You know, that's not a bad idea! We should've done it…oops," Jerry grinned stupidly. The man grinned back, mimicking Jerry. "Because of you, I'm being chased by some random airport people for doing something that I didn't know was wrong!"
"What'd you do?" Max asked.
"I don't know!" The man yelled wildly. "I think I've just been put on the terror watch list, whatever that is."
"Well, we already paid for our tickets, so we better get moving if we don't want to miss our flight," Theresa said suddenly as she quickly began ushering us towards the gate.
"You know, Dad, I feel really trapped on this plane," Max began one of his idiotic descriptions. "It's all metal-y and cramped. I feel surrounded. If something happens, I can't get out. I think it's the animal instinct in me."
"Max, calm down. You've been on a plane before, haven't you? And nothing ever happened." Jerry said.
"I've only been on one plane, and we just got off 2 minutes ago! I felt cramped there too!"
"You've only been on one plane?" Jerry asked, surprised.
"Yeah," Max replied, "we usually teleport."
I smiled. "Leave it to Jerry to forget about magic when it becomes important."
"Jerry?" Justin replied. "You call him Jerry now?"
"Not in front of him, no. But since he's not my real father, I don't feel compelled to." I sat down at the window seat. Justin slid in next to me. The rest of the family sat a row in front, diagonally to the left.
"How far is Malibu from San Francisco?" I asked Justin.
"Huh? Oh, I dunno…approximately 369 miles. We should get there in about an hour." Justin said, flipping through the atlas that is his brain.
Halfway through the flight, I suddenly remembered something that I wanted to ask Justin ages ago. "Hey, Justin. If you knew I wasn't your sister, then how come you always treated me like I was?"
"That's easy," Justin replied. "I knew you ever since you were a little baby. We grew up together! I love just the same, related or not." He smiled. I almost fainted while looking into his eyes, but pretended to pass it off as drowsiness. I promptly pretended to fall asleep.
I hope you enjoyed it. Like the summary says, there are going to be little appearances from the HM main cast – I'm just stealing the Malibu setting and possibly some other stuff. You like the fic so far? R&R
Note: To those of you who want me to update "Magvel Chronicles", I say that I am unable to determine an update time. If I don't have it by August 15, don't expect an update until Christmas. Sorry.