Disclaimer: None of the following events have happened or are yet to happen

(I hope). I do not own or am a part of the creation of Law and Order: Special Victims Unit, although I wish I was. Dick Wolf is the GOD of television! I do not wish to offend anyone by the events that will happen neither do I wish them upon the characters. This is not a bashers Fan Fiction.

Olivia's POV

Summary: Olivia tries to fight the ups and downs of loosing her "Partner in

Crime". She reflects on her career with this person although a

name is never said, its obvious who it is. Can Olivia make

through these hard times of death again?

Note: You may make the "he" or "you" into any of the male characters on the show! Enjoy!

Inspiration: If you have the CD "In This Skin" by Jessica Simpson… PLAY

IT! Turn it on number 6 (I Have loved You) and on repeat… and

listen while you read! This song was my inspiration to write a fan

fiction like this!

I got into my car and drove all the way to queens where your old house is…

Its For Sale.

I just sat there,

Looking at your house as I remember those nights,

We'd go out for a drink with everyone after a big case closed,

I'd drive you home and we would just sit here and gaze at each other…

One night you had one to many and leaned in and kissed me.

It was the best kiss I had ever.

You got out of the car and just smiled, said goodnight and I watched you stumble up the stairs and into your home.

I decided to drive to where you are,

I knew exactly where you were…

I went, nearly a 2-hour drive stopping only to get some roses,

Its been so long since I last saw you, I decided to bring you some,

white ones, you always would say to me

"Liv, the best way to put a smile on some ones face is to bring them white roses,

it's a symbol of life and shows you really love that person."

You gave me white roses once.

It was one night, I had been in the hospital after I was attacked and you handed me them, you said

"Liv, everything is going to be fine, you hear? I am sorry I wasn't there to protect you and from now on, I always will be."

I picked them up, gave the man some money, and stared at them.

I began to tear as I saw your face in my head. I saw your eyes when you kissed me, oh when you kissed me. It felt like the world stopped turning for that one moment, and everything was blurry… all I could see was your face.

I felt so safe around you, as if you were my protector of all bad. You always watched out for me, I felt like I could of taken over the world with you by my side. I wish you never had left me.

I got back into my car and sat there looking straight ahead…

I closed my eyes and started remembering more….

I began to grin as I remembered your compliments; they surrounded me like a giant hug you get from your grandmother, so warm and cozy.

You always knew what I was thinking about. Gosh you should of become a mind reader; not a cop. I would be down and you lifted me up.

So I began to drive thinking of nothing other than my destination and you.

Finally, there I was, Freezing and crying.

Wow, the leaves had sure begun to fall. Is it really already Autumn?

Remembering when we'd be at the park on the job during the fall and you would pick a pile of leaves up and throw them at me. It made me feel like I was young again.

I would always laugh and joke

"Now this isn't our job, is it?"

You would smile and say "Your no fun, Liv"

Gosh how I missed you. I couldn't believe how much I did.

So now I am here. Standing over were you lay.

Why did I let you go in first. Why didn't I?

Forever I will beat myself up over this.

and Forever… You will be in my heart. So deeply.

You will never leave me. ever. ever. again.