A/N: A very happy birthday to my friend cyang227! :D It's a day late, but here's the first chapter of a Four Swords story for you! It's not extremely comedic, but I'll try to throw in some funny things here and there. The title was kind of random, since I didn't really have much time to think about it. It is an actual word though. I swear. Go look it up if you don't believe me.
"Hey! Who ate all the pickles?!" the shout echoed throughout the forest, originating from a small clearing where a blue-clad boy was directing his perpetual scowl at his three companions.
"Nobody ate the pickles, Blue," one of his companions, a boy clothed in purple, replied from behind a book. "You're the only one that likes them."
Blue clenched his teeth angrily. "Are you suggesting that it was me, Vio? Because it wasn't! I wouldn't be making a big deal out of it if it was!"
"Sure you wouldn't…" another boy, this one in green, replied skeptically with a roll of his eyes. "I bet you just felt like starting an argument."
"Shut up! I didn't ask you for your opinion on my honesty, Green!" Blue spat.
"Please stop!" their final companion, a boy decked out in red, wailed. "It doesn't matter what happened to the pickles! All of our food is gone!" The boy burst into tears, leaving his identical companions stunned. Even Vio appeared mildly surprised at the revelation, for once losing interest in his book as he set it aside.
"What are you talking about, Red?" Green demanded. "It can't all be gone."
"But it is!" Red sniffed. "I just looked in the bag. There's nothing left!"
"It would appear that Red is correct," Vio spoke up. He was kneeling in the grass with the normally full food bag open before him. He tilted it forward to display its nonexistent contents to his counterparts.
"B-but… How?!" Blue exploded. "Who did this? If this is a joke, it's not funny!"
Green rounded on Blue. "Are you deaf? We've just established that none of us had anything to do with it! Besides, nobody would have had time to take the food! We've been traveling all day!"
Indeed they had. The dense forest seemed to go on forever, and they had counted themselves lucky to find a clearing to rest in. Although, stopping to rest didn't seem like it had been such a great idea anymore.
"Well, if I was in charge, we wouldn't be having this problem!" Blue retorted. "There's no way you're the main Link if you can't figure out the solution to a problem like this!"
Not again… Vio groaned inwardly as the two continued to bicker. Why can't they understand how foolish their incessant arguing is? One of these days it will split us up, and then-
"Well, maybe I don't want to stay with the group!" Blue's snap cut into Vio's thoughts. "I can take care of myself just fine!"
"Go right ahead! I certainly won't miss you!" Green shot back. Blue's eyes narrowed into angry slits and he whipped around, beginning to stalk away.
"Blue, wait!" Red cried. "If we don't stay together, who knows what terrible things could happen?"
"Didn't you hear me? I'll be just as fine on my own, maybe even better! I don't need help from anyone!" Blue shouted back as he disappeared into the undergrowth.
"Who needs him anyway?" Green huffed, crossing his arms and glaring after Blue. Meanwhile, Red had sunk to the ground, and was starting to tear up again. Vio walked over and placed a hand on the boy's shoulder.
"Don't worry, Red. I'm sure he'll be back. He's just blowing off steam." Red nodded, sniffling. Still, Vio was more concerned than he let on. Suppose Blue didn't come back, for whatever reason. The three of them might be fine for a while, but it wouldn't be long before there were repercussions. Not to mention that the Four Sword would never achieve its full power if they couldn't work together, and they wouldn't be able to become one person again, either. They would be stuck in their split personalities forever.
Suddenly, Red stood up, shrugging Vio's hand off of his shoulder. A look of fierce determination was on his face.
"I'm going after him."
"What?" Green stared at Red, appalled.
"You heard me. He couldn't have gone very far. I'll find him and convince him to come back." Red nodded once, as if to assure himself that this was the right thing to do.
"Wait a minute, R-ed?" Before Vio could finish his sentence, Red was gone as well, calling Blue's name as he sprinted into the forest.
"Well this is just great." Green grumbled. "I don't care about Blue, but there's no way that Red's going to be able to stay out of trouble."
Vio frowned, mentally calculating Red's chances of catching up with an angry Blue, and more difficult still, convincing him to return. The probabilities he came up with were not encouraging.
"Sooo… what should we do now?" Green asked when Vio didn't respond to his comment.
"Go after Blue and Red and make sure neither of them gets into trouble," Vio replied matter-of-factly.
Green scoffed. "Yeah, good luck with that. I'm in no hurry to see Blue come back. So you just go ahead and stop Red from doing something stupid, while I stay here and make sure you can find your way back. How's that sound?" Green plopped down on a large rock, sighing as he relaxed.
Vio scowled slightly at him. "It sounds like you're being lazy."
Green shrugged nonchalantly. "So what? I've been leading the whole time. Wouldn't you say I deserve a break?"
Vio rolled his eyes as he turned away. "Whatever. Just don't go anywhere. I don't want to have to search for you, too."
With that, Vio left Green and the clearing behind, plunging into the shadows of the forest in search of their two AWOL companions.
A/N: Sheesh. That's a lot of dialogue. Oh well. I guess it can't be helped when you have four main characters. Especially when nearly the entire chapter consists of arguing. XD I was in a hurry to post this, so I didn't proofread it. If you see any mistakes, please tell me so I can fix them. Anyway, let me know what you think!