A/N: ok so...this is my first attempt at a one-shot. enjoy!
She leaves him on a Sunday morning in cold December with nothing but a couple words explaining her departure. When he wakes up all he finds is a simple note saying:
"I'm sorry".
He doesn't believe it, can't believe it. They had been together for two years, what led her to leave him so unexpectedly?
He walks around their apartment only to find all her belongings gone. Her clothes, her pictures, her favorite mug, all her jewelry gone; every trace of her gone. The only memory of her that remains is a diamond necklace that he gave her for Christmas the year before and one of his t-shirts—which she would wear to sleep sometimes—with her lingering smell.
He runs to her brother's apartment hoping that this is all some sort of sick trick and she'll be there laughing with Dan and Vanessa. He hopes that she'll see him, smile her brilliant smile, and go up to him and tell him she was sorry for playing such a sick joke on him. He hopes that they'll go back to their apartment, put everything back where it belongs and go about their usual day.
But he realizes hope is over-rated when he knocks on Dan's door and finds no one else but him and Vanessa eating breakfast together, alone.
He goes back home and hopes that she'll be there as if nothing happened. But something did happen and now he's left alone in an apartment full of memories. Memories and nothing more.
He walks around like a zombie for days. The days turn into months. And the months turn into a year. He feels empty inside, lonely. He wants her back, needs her back. He needs to feel her lips on his, her arms around him, her warmth, her smile. He needs her back. Now. A full year has gone by and he still doesn't know where she is. Rufus and Dan are the only ones who know and they won't give him any information. Every evening he sits by the phone and hopes. He hopes that she'll call him and explain where she is. Hopes that she'll call and tell him to go look for her. Hopes that she'll tell him to open the door and he'll find her there with all her bags in her hand and he'll help her in and all will be as it should be.
But once again, he finds out hope is over-rated because she doesn't show and she never calls.
Chuck, Blair, Serena, Eric, Dan, Rufus, and even Lilly tell him it is time to move on. Two years have passed and still there is no sign of her. He hasn't dated anyone since she left and so Chuck and Blair set him up with one of Chuck's employees. He is reluctant, but still agrees to go. He finds her sitting in a booth at some bar and she introduces herself as Sarah. Sarah has brown hair and eyes as blue as hers. He stares at those eyes the entire evening and pretends he is listening to her every word when in truth he is hoping that those eyes belong to someone else. Hoping that it is she that he is here with, not Sarah. But he knows that hope is over-rated and so he continues to listen and he takes her to his apartment where they enjoy a wonderful night together and he pretends that she is the one sleeping next to him when he wakes up the next morning with bite marks and scratches and bruises.
He and Sarah don't last long. They break up because he still has feeling for his ex and he's sick of pretending that those blue eyes belong to someone else. On the eve of the anniversary of her three year departure, he receives a call from Dan. He feels as if that call has mended his heart. She's coming back. She'll be here in less than a day. He'll be with her again. And so he gets back to hoping. He hopes that she'll see him and run into his arms and they'll be able to mend their broken relationship and their broken hearts. He hopes that she'll be just as happy to see him as he is to see her. He hopes that their love for each other has survived the three years that she's been gone and he hopes that they'll sit together talking happily about where she's been and what she's seen. But his recently mended heart and his hope shatter the moment he sees her because she walks into her dad's arms—not his—and introduces him to her fiancé, Michael.
And so once again he realizes that hope is over-rated and now, so is love.
He pretends to be over her. After all, she is about to get married to someone who isn't him. He pretends to be fine. And yes, he is 'fine just fine' in front of her, but everyone can see that he's not fine, not fine at all. And she is either too ignorant to notice or too self absorbed to care. He decides that it is neither and hopes that she does notice that he's broken, but she just doesn't want to ruin anything between her and Michael by getting attached to her ex again. Plus, she knows him better than anyone; so why wouldn't she notice that she's breaking him.
One month passes and he's drowned his sorrows in one girl—or two—per night. He has become the new Chuck Bass and doesn't give a fuck. Her wedding is two months away and he still hasn't sent his RSVP. He doesn't think he'd be able to handle it. Doesn't think he'll be able to see her become someone else's.
One morning she ends up at his doorstep, though, to ask him why exactly he hasn't sent his RSVP. He replies that he's lost it and so she immediately hands him a new one and decides to fill it out. Apparently she has made the decision for him. So, yes, he will go and watch the girl he loves love somebody else and agree to love them for the rest of her life. And, yes, he will feel like punching him in the face, but no, he won't do it because he loves her and although it kills him, he has to let go. She deserves to be happy, right?
She decides to invite herself in and they end up talking for hours on end. He finds out where she's been (Paris), how she's been (fine just fine) and on and on and on.
But they avoid the one question that will lead them into their past. "Why?" He finally asks just as she's about to leave. She turns to him and her smile wavers. He sees her frown and then she looks at him with such warmth and is that—love?—that he actually might go through with punching Michael in the face. "I needed space." Is all she manages to say before walking out and closing the door behind her. And he's left wondering what she meant by that and whether Michael gives her 'space'.
One month later and they have rekindled their friendship. They talk every day for hours about who knows what and he feels truly happy for the first time in a while. But she's still getting married and she still doesn't love him back, so he's not entirely happy. One night she knocks on his door, crying hysterically. He invites her in and let's her cry on her shoulder for as long as she wants. He promises that he'll kill whoever hurt her like this and when he finds out that it was Michael he feels more than happy to do so. He finds out that she saw him cheating on her with some blonde bimbo.
And he's sad because she's sad. But he's happy because there might be a chance for him. So he hopes one last time that maybe, just maybe, she'll realize that she's truly meant to be with him and not Michael. Hopes that she'll dump Michael and get back with him and hopes and hopes and hopes.
She falls asleep on the bed they once used to share and then he goes out in search of the bastard that hurt her. He finds Michael at a bar hitting on a redhead. He walks up to him and punches him, twice. Then he turns around and goes back home where he finds her gone again with no explanation and not even a note this time. And so his hope dies and his heart turns cold.
She decides to forgive Michael for cheating and he decides that he'll go to the wedding and tell her how he really feels. Then he'll leave town and never come back. He'll leave and never have to hear her voice, or even her name.
He walks into her dressing room and sees the most beautiful creature standing in front of him. He looks at her and breathes her in. He memorizes her every feature. Her eye color, her lip color, her rosy cheeks, her perfect smile. She smiles at him and asks what he is doing there. And so he tells her.
He tells her the truth. He loves her. Always has, always will. He has missed her every day that she's been gone and doesn't think that he'll ever get over her. And now that they don't have a chance all his hope is gone and he has to leave. He can't watch her marry someone else.
He leaves her with those words and on his way out Chuck and Blair drag him inside the church and into a pew.
The ceremony begins and all he wants to do is leave. She walks down the aisle, with Rufus by her side and then he gives his little girl over to Michael. He notices that throughout the ceremony, her smile wavers and her brow furrows. When they get to the
"I do's" Michael says it without hesitation and he feels like punching the bastard over and over and over again, but he breathed deeply and keeps his cool.
She however, pauses before her "I do" and then looks over to him. She let's go of Michael, hands him the ring and leaves him with an "I'm sorry."
She runs out of the church and he follows only to find her crying a few blocks down the road. When she sees him, she smiles. She says she was stupid for leaving and she loves him. Always has, always will. She, too, has missed him. She says that she knows too much has happened and it will be hard to be together again.
But he knows that it's worse to finish than to start all over and so he walks closer to her. He wipes away the tears and then he just kisses her. He kisses her like he has wanted to for the past three years and he realizes it's everything he'll ever need. Because maybe hope isn't over-rated, and neither is love.
And so three years later, Nate Archibald sits down at the dinner table with his now wife, Jenny Humphrey. They sit and talk and laugh and love and he thinks of a time when love and laughter and happiness were non-existent. When they were over-rated. He remembers a time when direction and the meaning of life were lost to him. All because she was gone. But now she's back and his world is whole again. His belief in love, hope, laughter, happiness. It has all been re-awakened in his heart. Because she has returned and she was and forever will be his love, his happiness, his hope.
He was now and forever will be in love with Jenny Humphrey.
so what did you think? (please dont be too harsh)..
i was inspired by the song Perfect by Hedley. it's words just brought about this story. One Tree Hill also inspired me. Lucas Scott's "The Comet" helped write the last part of this story. :)