Something to kill the time until Tuesday night, pretty fluffy actually. What would be the most effective way to shut Ziva up in a tense situation?
Out of the Closet
Tony and Ziva were running for their lives. Normally three against two weren't bad odds for them, after all Tony's partner could become a ninja Mossad killing machine at will but the bad guys following them had guns and knives and Tony and Ziva had none having been disarmed by same bad guys just a few minutes before. They'd been left alone in a locked room while their captors held a meeting to decide in which delightful way they were going to kill their captives.
Ziva had been cursing him in Hebrew, blaming him for getting them caught in the first place. He had to admit she was almost right. He was the one who'd insisted they follow the lead they'd gotten without waiting for the go ahead from Gibbs. He had left a message for Gibbs on his desk and a message on McGee's voice mail with the scoop on their whereabouts so hopefully the cavalry would be right behind them. Well, sooner or later; sooner rather than later preferably or they'd be dead.
Ziva had discovered the heavy mesh covering the one tiny window in the room had a loose corner and together they had tugged it loose from its moorings until they could break the glass and squeeze through the narrow opening. Tony had pushed Ziva through with his hands on her round butt and Ziva had had to help pull him through. He'd had to strip off his black NCIS jacket and shirt, going through bare chested. He knew he'd left several inches of skin and some chest hair on that window sill.
Those raw patches throbbed now as he and Ziva ran through the abandoned strip mall. Most of the empty shops had metal cage doors making them impossible to use for hiding until Gibbs could ride to the rescue. He could hear the shouts of their would-be killers getting closer. He stopped to take his bearings and see if he could spot any promising hideouts. He was trying to slow his breathing when Ziva came back to him. She hadn't even broken a sweat. God, it was hard to be her partner sometimes.
"Come on, Tony, we have to keep running."
She took his left arm and tugged. He stood firm. She was strong but she wasn't able to budge him without resorting to some of her fancy martial arts moves unless he wanted her to. All those doughnuts were good for something, at least he could outweigh her.
"Whoa, Ziva. We need to find a hiding place. Gibbs and McGee should be here soon. All we need to do is stay alive until then."
She gave him a rebellious look and then changed her mind and nodded her agreement.
"Yes, okay. Where do you suggest?"
He took his time and looked around. He pointed toward a sign that said "restrooms." Beneath the sign was a hallway.
"Over there."
He took Ziva's hand and pulled her along behind him. They ran to the opening and then down the short hall. Tony saw what he was looking for right away - the men's room.
"Tony, I really think you can hold it for a while longer," Ziva said.
"Thanks for the vote of confidence, Ziva. But that's not why we're here. "
He opened the door and took Ziva in with him.
"I don't think…"
"C'mon, Ziva. I know you love going into men's rooms."
She stopped and put her hands on her hips.
"Tony, there is no place to hide in here. If you think they will not look in the stalls I believe you are sadly mistaken."
He had been making his way around the room looking for one thing. When he spotted it he said, "Aha," and turned around to smirk at Ziva.
He went to the corner of the room and put his hand out to a small indentation in one off white wall and pushed. A long, slender door popped open. He motioned to his partner.
"Over here, hurry."
Ziva looked at the small, cramped space and then at Tony.
"What is it? It is too small to be a closet."
Tony smirked.
"I guess you'd call it a broom closet of sorts. Men's rooms tend to have a lot of overflows and backups so most of them have a little area for mops and plungers. You just have to know where to look."
Ziva looked skeptical.
"I do not believe we will both fit in there, Tony. Too much of us and too little space."
"We'll fit, Ziva. It'll just be tight quarters."
They heard a noise outside the door of the restroom. Tony shoved her in and then squeezed in after her, pulling the door closed behind him. When he heard it click he turned to look at her.
Her eyes were only a few inches from his. They stood face to face and his bare chest was brushed by the soft cotton of her blouse. When he changed the position of his feet their pelvises bumped. Ziva took a deep breath and her breasts definitely touched him.
"Tony, I do not like this. We are trapped. If they find us we are dead."
"Shush, Ziva," he whispered.
"I am not going to stay here, Tony. We are like those fish in the barrel, yes?"
"Shut up, Ziva!" he put his hands on her arms shaking her slightly. He kept his hold on her. He didn't want her trying to get out the door.
"Don't shake me, Tony! I will not stay here."
Tony didn't know what to do. She could be so damned stubborn. He thought he heard the creak of the men's room door opening.
Ziva opened her mouth to say something else and Tony did the only thing he could think of to do to shut her up. He kissed her.
He tensed, waiting for Ziva to hurt him. Instead, after a moment, he felt her lips soften under the pressure from his and then her mouth opened slightly. Without his even thinking about it he pushed his tongue in and was met by hers, a gentle teasing and probing. He moved his hands from her arms; one went around her back pulling her closer and the other up higher so he could put his hand on the back of her head, holding her so he could continue his exploration of her mouth. Her soft hair covered his hand and he grasped a couple of strands in his fingers as he continued the kiss.
She put her hands on his chest and slid them up his body, slowly running her fingers over his chest leaving a tingling trail behind as she encircled his neck, standing on her toes and leaning into him as much as she could. He felt her hard nipples poke through her shirt. Their bodies melded together. Tony felt himself growing longer and harder, his penis forcing its way between their bodies, straining against the material of his jeans. He knew Ziva could feel it too because she moaned into his mouth and thrust her hips toward him, rubbing herself on him.
He forced himself to stop kissing her and moved his mouth to her right ear.
"Shushhhh, Ziva," he whispered hoarsely.
He felt her shiver and then she pushed against him even harder. If he hadn't had the wall just an inch from his back he would have fallen and taken her down with him and there would have been no stopping the inevitable then.
Ziva pulled his head back down and kissed him once again with an urgency he quickly returned and he forgot about the men with guns who might be in the room right outside their hiding place. Forgot about them until he heard the sharp sound of gunshots from somewhere nearby.
He tried to turn his body to protect Ziva in case any stray bullets came through the wall but things were just too close so he tightened his arms around her, pulling her head to his chest. She returned the favor by encircling his waist and holding him tightly.
No more gunshots. No sound at all.
"Can we leave now, Tony?" Ziva said softly, not moving from where he held her.
"No, I don't think so. Not until we know who's out there," he said.
"Good," she said and held her head back and stood on tiptoe, leaning her body against his. In the darkness of the closet he could just see the shadows of her face, she smiled and held her mouth up to him again.
Kissing her he tried to run his hands up her body so he could touch her breasts, just once. He couldn't get the right angle. His elbows kept hitting the wall when he tried to get under her shirt. Ziva tried to help him but only succeeded in making matters worse. She moaned again, this time in frustration. She tried to undo his jeans but had the same problem.
"Dammit!" they both whispered.
"DiNozzo, David!"
It was Gibbs' voice calling their names.
"Crap."
Ziva sighed and rubbed her face on his chest.
"Shush," Tony told her again and pulled her hair easing her head back and kissing her as soon as he could reach her lips. They were molded together trying to get even closer. Tony tried to reach down her back to get his hands on her bottom and he unthinkingly stuck out his elbows again. He hit the door hard and it hurt.
"Crap, that hurts!!"
Trying to reach the painful elbow he inadvertently pushed Ziva away from him as far as the wall would allow and she got unbalanced and fell toward the door. She hit the wood hard, made an "ooof" sound and then the door popped open. She grabbed Tony's arm as she went through and pulled him out with her. He tried to stop her but lost his balance as well and both of them landed on the floor outside the skinny closet with him on top of her.
He forgot about his elbow as he lay on top of her slender body, her eyes were open and looking up into his. He thought he read the invitation there and he leaned in for another kiss.
The bathroom door burst open and Gibbs and McGee came through the door with guns drawn.
"What the hell do you think you're doing, DiNozzo? Get off her!" Gibbs barked.
McGee came over holstering his Sig. He stuck his hand out to Tony and helped him up. Then repeated the gesture to Ziva and pulled her up too.
"Sorry, boss, we hid in that closet and we couldn't get out. Door stuck. We heard you calling and we tried to open the door but we…"
Gibbs walked over to Tony and slapped the back of his head, hard.
"Ow, boss! Thank you, boss."
Then Gibbs walked to where Ziva stood and slapped the back of her head too. She looked shocked but then nodded. Gibbs nodded back to her.
"C'mon. Ducky should be showing up soon if Palmer doesn't get lost again. Kid couldn't find his ass with both hands."
McGee followed Gibbs out. As Ziva turned to leave Tony held her back.
"Ziva, about the closet…I, uh, don't know what made me kiss you but I don't feel like I need to apologize. I'm not quite sure what to say."
She put her fingers to his lips, smiled and said "Shush. Do not say anything, Tony. Just if the situation ever comes up again try to find a roomier closet."
She smiled at him and then went out the door. He would swear she had an extra little wriggle in her walk.
He grinned. A roomier closet…something to keep in mind.