I can't believe what my eyes have just seen. Suddenly my dream became a nightmare. Not only he was kissing her, but she returned the kiss, so she was enjoying that intimate moment with Maya's cousin. I should have known Nate was trying to be more than a friend… Too many hours visiting her in the café and the night of Jenna's party I caught them talking more than once, and smiling at each other in a very suspicious way. At first I thought it was just two people sharing feelings about the girl they both loved, Maya. Besides, I was high because of that damn flask, so I didn't remember everything that happened at the party. Well, yeah, I remember those disgusting cupcakes! But the way Nate looked at Emily was definitely not the way I look at a friend, he had the same expression I have when I'm looking at her, like he was in a daze (I don't blame him, though). I can't stop thinking about all these ideas running through my mind while I'm walking towards my house. At first I'm not angry, probably because I'm in shock after the disgusting thing I witnessed. Suddenly I start to feel anger, my heart is racing, I want to scream, but I know I can't do that, I'm too close to Emily's house. Instead I throw the trash bins that come across in my way, but that doesn't help my actual nervousness. I would like to have someone to talk to, someone who can listen to me, but sadly that person was Emily. Obviously I can't talk to her about this, I need to think about what just happened, calm down and think about what I'm going to do about it. While I'm getting home I text her a message saying that I'm not feeling well and that I can't make it. Ok, I think I need to get into the swimming pool and get rid of the stress and anger I'm experiencing. Swimming always helps me when I need to make an important decision, although I know this time it won't be really helpful. I arrive home and I try to avoid my parents, sneaking into my bedroom to get my swimsuit. My parents are watching TV in the living room, they are very concentrated in the movie, so I think I may get lucky. But when I am just about to open the door to go to the swimming pool, I hear my mother's words.
"Paige. What are you doing home? I thought you had plans." She is looking at me strangely, trying to understand what happened.
"Yes, mom. I went for a coffee and I came back. I am tired, I need to rest". Ok, I'm stupid, why did I say that? If I was tired I would have gone directly to rest. I think my neurons are on vacation, I prefer to think it must be because of the fateful kiss.
"You are tired and you feel like swimming. That's strange, Paige". She suspects something is wrong. But I don't want to talk about it.
"I need five minutes in the pool, mom. Don't worry, I'm fine."
After saying those words I go outside, ready to swim some laps. I can't help remembering what happened in this same pool some days ago. She came to my house and told me she wanted to be with me so badly, now she's kissing another person. Good for you, Fields! I see my cellphone is ringing, maybe it's Emily. Whatever, I want to be alone. The feeling of the water touching my body is comforting and relaxing. I can't stop swimming, it feels really good, until I hear the cellphone, again. I think it's time to face reality, it's Emily. 20 missed calls, she is very insistent. Although I am pissed off, I want to be with her, but I wouldn't know how to handle the situation, so I prefer to go take a shower and go to bed. I know I won't get to sleep, not with all those images and feelings torturing me. The shower feels good, now it's time to rest a little bit. Close your eyes, Paige, tomorrow will be another day.