Prologue
After successfully stopping the Collectors just past the Omega-4 relay, Shepard and her crew were left in an uncertain state of limbo. Shepard refused to help the Illusive Man and Cerberus once she discovered why the Reapers were so interested in obtaining human genetic material. The risk of turning over Reaper technology to an organisation she already didn't trust was simply too high. Now Shepard's team has been cut off from Cerberus and all its resources while still maintaining control of the Normandy SR-2.
Even Cerberus Operative Miranda claims to be disconnected from the Illusive Man but very few crew members believe her and they treat her with outright suspicion and hostility. Shepard reminds her crew that they are now on their own with no support from Cerberus, the Alliance, or the Council and that she will not tolerate any in-fighting aboard the Normandy so long as she holds command. She gives each crew and squad-mate an opportunity to abandon the Normandy and its mission if they no longer feel comfortable with the state of things after the relay incident.
Since the entire crew had been kidnapped and imprisoned by the Collectors, they were entirely thankful to their commander for rescuing them. While they appreciated the gesture of her offer, they were unwilling to abandon her now after all they had been through together. The entire ordeal beyond the relay had solidified the commander's resolve to stop the Reapers and the fight had become a personal one for her and everyone who had been there. Even if the rest of the galaxy was unwilling to acknowledge the threat, the Normandy's crew stood absolutely by their commander and her mission.
The general mission of the Normandy had not changed; they were still tasked with gathering evidence of Collector or geth activity that may provide clues on the movements and plans of the Reapers who were quietly biding their time in dark space. The destruction of both Heretic Station and the Collector base beyond the relay had certainly diminished enemy activity across the entire galaxy. Shepard is not even convinced that the Reapers would continue to rely on their Collector and geth allies any longer given recent events.
But there is little else she can go on and even if she could find the Reapers or decipher their plans, she is only the commander of a single vessel without allies. This does not dissuade her, however, and she hopes that Normandy can gather enough data to prevent a future attack, no matter where it may take place. At the very least, they may be able to convince the Council and/or the Alliance to aide them if they can provide sufficient evidence that the Reapers exist at all.
It is an unsettling time of constant vigilance. Shepard is wary of Cerberus' plans and ambitions and fully expects them to try and regain control of the Normandy at any moment. Part of her wishes to rejoin the Alliance fleet but she cannot expect them to trust her after her tenure with Cerberus. She remembers too clearly how Commander Kaidan Alenko had reacted to her presence on the colony of Horizon because she kept Cerberus allies. She had tried to explain her predictament and claimed that she was only trying to stop the Reapers and not working for Cerberus at all but it hadn't been convincing enough. There was little chance that the rest of the Alliance would treat her any differently.
Her rank within the Alliance and standing as a Spectre for the Citadel Council hardly mean anything any more. All she can rely on is the crew of the Normandy though they are still recovering from the traumatic experience that they had all endured within the Collector base. Shepard has spent nearly every waking moment since escaping the Cerberus base that had rebuilt her with the Lazarus Project fighting battles and protecting those around her because it was the right thing to do. But without allies and support, who will try to protect her?
Chapter 1
Shepard watched as everything around her seemed to slow down. For a brief moment, time stood still. She saw Jacob and Garrus clear the large gap between the ledge and the Normandy with ease. The commander took a deep breath as she neared the ledge herself. Once she reached it, she pushed against it with all the strength she could muster. The platform began to crumble and fall away as she gained momentum. Hopefully it had been enough momentum propel her towards the ship.
She closed her eyes half-way through the jump and was mildly surprised to suddenly feel the hard steel of the Normandy's deck beneath her arms as she slammed into it. She had expected to keep flying onwards, as she had when the first Normandy had been destroyed beneath her by the Collectors. But she had been lucky. This time.
The commander opened her grey-blue eyes and saw Garrus' much darker teal ones looking at her with concern. He didn't hesitate and grabbed her arm the second she was within his reach.
"Shepard, I've got you," he said but she could not hear him over the Normandy's thrusters and the sound of Joker's gun as he took potshots at the Collectors who were determined to strike one final blow against the commander.
Garrus hauled the commander safely into the cargo bay of the ship with one swift movement and seconds after she was clear, the bay's doors slammed shut behind her. Shepard was a bit dazed from the effort, the adrenaline still pumping through her body at a rapid pace. She got to her feet as soon as she was able.
She could hear EDI's voice, warning about the impending detonation of the base below and Joker's frantic response. Without thinking she followed after Joker as he settled into the cockpit and pushed the Normandy's thrusters to their max. She watched as the Omega-4 relay came swiftly back into view and sighed the biggest possible sigh of relief once the Normandy had made the jump to the other side.
"Let's never do that again," Joker said in a shaking voice as the two of them looked out the viewport to see the familiar star patterns of the Omega system. It looked so peaceful and serene after what they had just witnessed. Shepard never thought she'd be so glad to see the Omega system but in spight of it all she just laughed at the contrast.
"Glad you're amused," Joker said slyly, though his voice was scratchy as if he had been yelling earlier.
Shepard collapsed in a chair next to the pilot and tried to control her thoughts. Her body was still shaking as the adrenaline began to fade and leave aching muscles behind.
"Tali." It was the first thing that came to the commander's mind. Joker looked over at her with a saddened expression.
"We recovered her body, if you were wondering.." he said quietly.
"I need to see her. I need to be sure," Shepard said with a hint of panic. Before Joker could say anything else, she had already left the cockpit and ran back towards the elevator to go down to the Engineering Deck. She wasn't sure where the leftover energy came from, her muscles were beginning to cramp terribly but she had to know Tali's fate. She just had to know.
The elevator's doors opened and she could see debris and mangled electronics throughout the Normandy's lower structure. It was an utter mess. And it was crowded. Many of the wounded crewmen were being treated by the medical staff and all of Shepard's squad-mates could be found catching their breath. Everyone looked reasonably shaken up and unwilling to meet Shepard's eyes.
The feeling of dread in the commander's stomach grew as she reached the spot where Tali's body lay motionless in her protective environment suit. It looked as if she were simply having a rest admist the chaos of what was going on around her. Doctor Chakwas shook her head before Shepard could say anything.
"No. It's not fair, after everything she went through. Her father's death and the trial..we finally had a fighting chance against geth and everything. She doesn't deserve this," Shepard said to nobody in particular. She looked over at Garrus who was standing close but hadn't said a word. Judging by the expression on his face, Shepard assumed it was the turian equivalent of showing sadness or even crying. She felt tears against her own cheeks then as the reality began to settle in.
"It's not fair," she said again in a whisper. She knelt down by Tali's body and wished she had known something, anything about quarian funeral rites then. But no more words came out, only tears. The last time she had cried had been on Akuze, several years ago when her whole unit had fallen to a thresher maw, leaving her behind to suffer the survivor's guilt. She didn't feel guilty at that moment but instead felt absolutely lost and disoriented.
Garrus knelt down beside the commander and wrapped an arm around her, still remaining silent. She turned to return the gesture and found herself crying audibly into his shoulder. He didn't mind. The pair of them had been Tali's closest friends since she had rejoined Shepard's crew. It felt like losing a family member more than a sister-in-arms.
"This is the Illusive Man's fault. All of it!" Shepard finally said loudly after the tears began to dry up.
"Now who is being unfair? Be reasonable, Shepard, we all knew the risks going into this mission," Miranda said coolly from across the room. She was leaning against a crate of supplies with her arms folded and gave the commander a disapproving glare.
"Be reasonable?" the woman pushed away from Garrus and made her way over to where Miranda stood. She stopped a few inches from Miranda's face, looking her directly in the eye. Their blue eyes met and it was hard to tell which pair of eyes looked colder between the two of them.
"Miranda. Don't." was all Garrus said. It was obvious to everyone aside from Miranda that Shepard was experiencing the first stage of grief and was likely not interested in hearing any of Miranda's rational dribble at that moment.
"The Illusive Man has been playing us this whole time. How is it not obvious by now? All he ever wanted was more Reaper technology and he didn't care how he got it. He put humanity at risk. He put all of us at risk. He murdered Tali, as far as I am concerned," Shepard shouted in the other human's face. Miranda didn't back down.
"A Collector shot Tali, not the Illusive Man-" Miranda began to explain but Shepard had lost what was left of her self-control and raised a fist in an attempt to deck the other woman for daring to defend her superior in front of her.
Jacob intervened then and grabbed Shepard by the elbow. Her elbow jerked back and knocked him hard in the nose and he backed off with a grunt. She didn't make another attempt to strike, instead she simply stared Miranda down for a few seconds.
Eventually she backed off and began to walk back towards the elevator, "I'm going to go give him a piece of my mind, for Tali's sake."
"Would not recommend, Shepard. Distraught and experiencing grief. Full of hormones and strong emotions. Not a good combination. May say something you regret," Mordin said with what should have sounded like concern to Shepard. But she was in a rage and didn't hear it quite that way.
"Stuff it," she said without even looking at the salarian.
Jack whistled, "Damn, she is pissed."
Shepard ignored her and left the room. Too many thoughts were running through her mind. She didn't really want to talk to the Illusive Man. What she wanted was to shoot him cleanly between his creepy-looking eyes.
"Shepard, you're making a habit of costing me more than time and money," the Illusive Man said from the safety of his hiding place.
"I'm sorry, I'm having trouble hearing you - I'm getting a lot of bullshit on this line," Shepard retorted through the virtual communication device. If only he was really standing there in front of her instead of being so many lightyears away.
"Don't try my patience. The technology from that base could have secured humanity's dominance in the galaxy against the Reapers and beyond," the other human pointed out calmly.
"Human dominance? Or just Cerberus?" the commander asked icily.
"Strength for Cerberus is strength for every human. Cerberus is humanity. I should have known you'd choke on the hard decisions. Too idealistic from the start," the man sounded defeated. Good, let him feel that way, Shepard thought to herself.
"I'm not looking for your approval. Harbinger is coming and he won't be alone. Humanity needs a leader who is looking out for them. From now on, I'm doing things my way whether you agree or not," Shepard said pointedly, glaring at the other human through the communication device. She then turned away to turn the device off, having nothing left to say and feeling too angry to even look at the Illusive Man any more.
"Don't turn your back on me, Shepard! I made you, I brought you back from the dead," the man yelled, finally breaking his cool demeanour.
"Joker, lose this channel," Shepard said with finality and the device was instantly turned off from within the Normandy. Angrily she exited the conference room and refused to look back. She would have to have Joker and EDI severe the connection with the Illusive Man for good now; there was no point in having a direct connection any longer.