PICKUP NO JUTSU
Part One: Sasuke
Naruto was trying to dedicate all of his admittedly limited mental processes to enjoying the bowl of ramen in front of him. Unfortunately, a certain dark haired avenger was hovering behind him, making it very difficult.
"Teme," he growled, slamming his chopsticks down, "Go away, or sit down and order a bowl!"
Reluctantly, Sasuke slid into the bar stool next to Naruto. "Tch, I just wanted to tell you that you smell, dobe ... let's go take a shower."
Naruto paused mid-slurp. The noodles hanging out of his mouth glistened like little tentacles, making Sasuke's mouth go dry. Bright blue eyes met black ones, and Sasuke could barely breathe. Had Naruto finally noticed ...?
"Eh?!" Naruto sucked the rest of the ramen in, and stared incredulously before breaking out into giggles. "Hahahahaha! I bet you didn't realize it, but that sounded really perverted, Sasuke-teme!"
Sasuke banged his head onto the table. Or he would have if there wasn't a steaming bowl of Ichiraku's finest miso directly in his forehead's trajectory. He was now covered in noodles. The soup plastered his award-winning hair down in ratty tendrils. Perhaps it just wasn't meant to be, he mused morosely. Perhaps he should have just focused on hatred and revenge, like his mind told him to ... only, Naruto was like a bad case of diarrhea to him. He just couldn't hold those feelings in!
"Shut up," Sasuke spat bitterly, about to storm off broodily, but then a hand on the side of his face stopped him. Naruto was gazing at him in ... hunger?!
"Delicious," Naruto breathed huskily, and a little bit of drool escaped from the corner of his mouth. "Sasuke."
He leaned closer and closter, and Sasuke could feel his warm break puffing inches from his own mouth. Naruto moved upwards and ate the noodle that was dangled from Sasuke's hair down to his nose. "Tastes a bit like hairspray ... but not bad!"
Sasuke was going to chidori a certain blonde retard for playing with his Uchiha heart like this. "DOBE, YOU -"
It was then that he had a wonderful idea. They didn't call Sasuke a genius for nothing, after all. "Hey Naruto," Sasuke purred casually. "I bet you two bowls of ramen that my dick can't fit in your mouth."
"TWO?!" Naruto shouted joyously, his mind only picking up on the words 'bet' and 'ramen'. "You're on!"
NEXT PART: Hyuuga Neji!