"John! There are people outside our flat!" Sherlock called to his best friend, "and they have children with them!" a note of panic crept into his voice as he watched a small family climb out of a battered blue van and head directly for his front door.
"So? People come here all the time Sherlock, they probably need you to solve a case for them." John replied, coming out of his room to see what all the fuss was about.
"Don't be ridiculous John." Sherlock scoffed, his sharp eyes still trained on the strangers. There were four of them, a tall man in a worn leather jacket, a blond woman who appeared to be his wife, and two brown haired boys who, judging by their heights, were around ten and sixteen respectively. "They brought children John. Children. You don't bring children with you when you need someone to solve an unsettling mystery. Besides, they're far too happy. They're clearly not worried about the disappearance of great uncle Frank, or their cat Mittens, or anything even remotely worth my attention. So why are they here John?" he demanded, turning to his friend with an aggravated expression on his pale face.
John leaned over to see the cause of Sherlock's discomfort, and smiled as he caught sight of the large man who was leading the family to the door. "Oh, that's just Doctor Smith and his family," he chuckled."...Don't you remember?" he demanded, the smile dropping off his face as Sherlock stared at him, clearly not recognising the name. "Really Sherlock, I told you about this just last night. John Smith works at my clinic, and-"
"Oh, that explains it." Sherlock interrupted him with a yawn. "I never listen when you talk about work. Its just so boring. I delete the conversation before I even hear it. Much easier that way. Leaves room for information that's actually important."
John stared at his flatmate in disbelief. "Are you saying that every conversation I've ever had with you about work, you've never listened to a word I said?!" he spluttered angrily.
"Mmmm, yes. I just said that. Do try to keep up John." Sherlock replied, examining his nails with disinterest.
John took a deep breath and tried to keep his anger in check. "Well then, I'd pay attention if I were you, Mr. High-and-Mighty, cause this actually is going affect your life somewhat, which you'd already know if you paid attention to me last night."
"Well get on with it then!" Sherlock demanded impatiently, eyeing the Smith family as Mrs. Hudson opened the door and welcomed them in.
"As I was saying," John glared at his rude friend. "Doctor John Smith came to work at the clinic a few weeks ago, he's a brilliant doctor, could probably be a specialist and head of his own private practice if he put his mind to it, but he says he's happy as a GP. We were talking yesterday, and it turns out he's been living out of a van with two kids and a pregnant wife. So I told him how Mrs. Hudson's been fixing up the basement flat and how I was sure she'd be happy to give it to them cheap. Its probably too small for a family that size, but it's a hell of a lot bigger than a rusty old van." he finished, glancing out at the vehicle in question.
"They live in that monstrosity?" Sherlock looked at the van in distaste. "How on earth do they all fit comfortably in there?"
"Beats me." John shrugged "He claims its 'bigger on the inside', whatever that means. And its lived Sherlock, not live. I talked to Mrs. Hudson last night, she agreed that we can't just leave them all crammed in a car together, and said she'd be happy to have them stay in 221C."
"But John!" Sherlock whined, crossing his long arms over his chest. "They have children. We can't have children here, they'll distract me."
John shook his head. "Its not up to you Sherlock. Besides," he grinned cheekily "I thought you liked being distracted. Isn't that what all those bloody drugs and cases are for? So that big brain of yours doesn't get bored. Maybe next time you have nothing to do you can offer to babysit instead of shooting up the walls." he laughed at the expression of horror that crossed the consulting detectives face at the very idea of having to watch children. "I'm kidding Sherlock. Despite what you think of the average persons intelligence, I'm sure no one is stupid enough to leave you alone with their children. Especially not Christopher. He's a very clever man you know. Might give you a run for your money in the eccentric genius department."
"Christopher? You said his name was John." said Sherlock, narrowing his eyes thoughtfully.
"Which must mean Christopher is a middle name. John Christopher Smith, that sounds about right...He's named after his father of course, perhaps some sort of family tradition. He would normally go by Christopher to avoid confusion, probably employs the same method at your surgery since the two of you share the most common male name in the English language."
John rolled his eyes and clapped sarcastically. "Bravo Sherlock. You managed to deduce why I called a man named John, Christopher. You truly are the worlds greatest detective."
"There's no need to be so snippy John, just because you're still annoyed with me for deleting banal conversations that I have no use for." Sherlock replied, noting how tense Johns shoulders were. "...and what do you mean, he'll give me a run for my money?"
"Well, you're either going to hate him or love him." smirked John, thinking of the two mens many similarities. "He's an odd man who doesn't get along with most people, knows pointless facts about obscure things and is almost always the smartest person in the room. Sound familiar? He's even managed to one up you in one area."
"And what's that?" Sherlock scoffed, annoyed at being compared to some crazy doctor.
"He's an avid astronomer, so at least he knows what the solar system is."
A/N: this crossover story is set in an alternate universe where The Doctor is not only human, but each NuWho regeneration is a separate member of the Smith family, and they move into the flat below John and Sherlocks. I told myself a long time ago that I would never write Sherlock Holmes, as he was far too clever and complicated a character for me to portray properly. But I got inspired by how funny it would be to see Sherlock babysit a ten year old version of the Eleventh Doctor, so here we are, and I hope you enjoy him. (I only hope I can do his brilliance justice.)
it might take a few chapters to get to the point where much happens, and I am working on like five different stories at the moment, so I probably won't update for a while, but i wanted to get a start on it anyway..give you a taste of whats to come...eventually...please tell me what you think!