Dean had never been one for the holidays.
Sure, all the lights twinkling in the dusk were nice. The hot chocolate was soothing, and the dazzling snow in the sun was actually very beautiful. But with all the candy and joy and family came the cold and the dark and the loneliness.
So, when December hit, and every house looked like it had just come out of one of those ABC Family movies, Dean wasn't very impressed. More than anything, he just felt exhausted looking at it all.
He was sitting on the Impala when it happened. Snow was drifting down lazily from the starry sky, and the only light was from the glaring headlights of the vehicle and a faint glimmer from houses in the distance. Though a shiver followed a course down his spine, Dean had never felt more comfortable.
For the first time in a long while, Castiel was with him.
He made his way over, hands buried in the pockets of his trenchcoat, and offered Dean a small smile. It barely reached his eyes, but lately, neither of them had been truly happy. Castiel's lips were pink and chapped from the wind fiercely beating his skin. His hair was damp with snow, some flakes still sprinkled in his dark locks. But his eyes, those eyes…a crystal blue that even the clearest of oceans and lakes could never compete with.
Of course, those thoughts just remained that. Thoughts. They weighed heavy in Dean's head and heart, and although they stained his lips with their presence, they never made it through the gate.
So, instead of making his friend uncomfortable with his prolonged gazing, he looked up and stared at the moon. It was full tonight. Most of the time, that would mean doom was looming overhead. Some form of death. But not tonight.
Tonight belonged to Dean and Castiel.
When his friend finally reached him, he leaned back on the hood right next to Dean. He followed Dean's gaze to the sky and smirked. "Enjoying the scenery?" he asked quietly in that voice of gravel that Dean loved oh-so-much.
Instead of falling to his knees and cherishing him the way he wanted to, Dean just laughed softly. "Full moon tonight," he commented.
Castiel nodded slowly. "Is that why you called me here? Did you need my help on a case?"
"No." Dean shook his head, looking down at the thin sheet of snow that barely reached his ankles.
"Then why?"
He opened his mouth, then closed it. Why did he call Cas? Because he wanted him? Because he needed him? Or just to prolong this torture of wanting, but not having. Taking and taking from the one man who had only given him his everything.
But Dean didn't do chick-flick moments. So he chuckled and said, "Nah, man, I don't know. Maybe I just wanted to check in with an old buddy of mine." He turned his head to look at Castiel, whose lips lifted in a half-smirk.
Cas met Dean's eyes with his own, and they just stared. Like they always did. Searching the eyes for something that was trapped behind a thick black veil. Something that would never reach the outside world. It was like trying to coax your reflection out of a mirror.
As it always did, the stare broke, and they both let out a short puff of air, visible in the biting air. When they looked back up at the sky, Dean noticed a shooting star along the inky blackness, leaving a gold trail behind it.
"Hey, look," he whispered, pointing up at the beautiful occurrence.
Castiel chuckled at the sight. "Aren't you supposed to make a wish on a 'shooting star'?"
"Yeah, dude," Dean confirmed. "What do you wish for?"
He smiled, not meeting Dean's eyes. "Oh, I don't know," Castiel sighed. "I guess…I wish for peace. For the dust to finally settle instead of always turning into another big mess."
Dean had never thought Cas was more beautiful than in that moment.
"Huh," he mumbled. "Yeah, I get that."
Castiel's eyes welled up with tears, but Dean couldn't see them. He had already forced himself to turn away.
"What would you wish for?" he whispered solemnly.
Dean bit his lower lip. "Maybe the same thing. I don't know. Maybe to win the lottery or for a big house. How 'bout…an unlimited supply of pie?"
Castiel laughed, loud and true. It filled Dean with warmth from head to toe.
"Really, though, Dean." He stepped in front of the man, but Dean just kept his eyes on the horizon. Every crunch of Castiel's shoes in the snow brought the nerves in the taller man's body from a tingle to an electrifying shock. "What do you want?" With every word, Castiel's hot breath fanned across Dean's face. It smelled sweet, like sugar, and Dean found himself wanting to drown in it.
The silence stretched on between them, but faint music was playing from the Impala's radio. A song Dean had never heard before, but for some reason, it fit the moment so well.
Dean knew this was the point of no return. He could confess now, and never ever turn back, or he could utter another dumb lie. He could walk away. A door was being presented to him, but it was his choice whether or not to walk through it or turn the lock.
He decided to bust it down.
"I would wish for happiness," he whispered, meeting Castiel's beautiful eyes. His voice rose as he gained strength, but his hands never stopped shaking. "I would wish for a big house, like I said. Maybe a couple of kids, an apple pie life. A regular job, where I get up at 6:00 a.m. every morning and go to bed at 9 o'clock each night. Just my own peaceful corner of the world. But, also, uh…I'd, um…I'd wish for you."
As soon as he said the words, he couldn't even look at Cas. The blush on his cheeks burned fiercely, so harsh he couldn't even feel the wind nipping at them any longer. But still, he kept speaking.
"I'd wish to wake up beside you, and go to bed next to you. Go to doctor's appointments for the kids together, argue about money, and offer up ideas at stupid P.T.A. meetings. The whole package." He laughed, not daring to look Castiel in the eye.
The silence seemed to go on for eons.
"Dean."
He clenched his jaw, awaiting rejection.
"Dean."
Lifting up his chin, he stared at Castiel.
"Dean," Cas sighed, grabbing his jacket and pulling him into a kiss unlike any other he'd experienced.
It wasn't soft and gentle and exploring, like he'd expected it to be. It was rough and needy. Years of tears and alcohol and denial had all led up to this moment. And it was something they'd both needed. It was inevitable.
The whole kiss was different, yes. But at the same time, it was everything he'd ever desired.
When Castiel's lips left his, he found himself chasing them. He cradled Cas's head in his rough grip and captured his lips once again, this time with a grin and a laugh. He had never felt happiness like this before.
Forget it, he was definitely one for the holidays.
The song in the background reached a crescendo at the chorus, and it all felt so right. This was the climax of their story. The big moment everyone had waited for, even if everyone only consisted of the two of them.
They pulled apart with a whimper from Cas and a chuckle from Dean.
"Do you really want those things, Dean?" Castiel panted into his mouth.
Dean nodded, keeping his forehead rested against Castiel's. "Yeah, Cas. I do."
And Castiel grinned, gripping Dean's hand in his own. When he intertwined their fingers, the two couldn't help but feel butterflies in their stomachs.
"I like this feeling," Castiel whispered.
"What feeling?"
"Peace."
Dean grinned, pecking Cas on the lips once again. He just couldn't get enough of the taste.
Cas didn't seem to mind. He smiled, genuinely, and it reached those eyes this time. "What do you feel, Dean?"
"I feel happy."
And ten years later, while Mary was swinging with her best friend at the park, Dean grabbed Castiel's hand, entwining their fingers, now a bit more wrinkled with age. He lay his head down on his husband's shoulder, who just smiled, as he always did, and pressed a soft kiss to his forehead.
"Cas?"
"Hmm?"
"How do you feel?"
They both broke out into grins, memories of that first night flashing through their brains like a montage of perfection.
As they watched their daughter swing and laugh happily, Castiel whispered in his lover's ear, "Like I got everything I ever wished for."
And, well, Dean couldn't argue with that.
Ugh, this is the fluffiest piece of trash I've ever written. I'm ashamed. It's 1:46 a.m. on a Monday morning, I have school in four hours, and I'm writing Destiel fanfiction. Oh well. BTW, the song is "All Of The Stars" by Ed Sheeran. If you wanted to know.
