Disclaimer:I do not own BtVS or the song.

A/N:This was a request peice. This is for SinisterSlayer. Thank you for the request and all the input you've given me.


Looking back at me I see
That I never really got it right

I always wondered why you tried to be friends with me. I had never said or done anything to imply that I wanted to be your friend. I'm not saying that I didn't, I did, in fact I wanted to be so much more. But you had Angel in the beginning, and then I came back, expecting a second chance, and you'd up and fallen in love again. The disappointment is clear; everyone but you sees it, if only you weren't so blind sometimes.

God, B, what've you done to me. How did you change me?

"Faith!" My mom yelled yet again.

"Yes mom?" I asked with a yawn.

"What do you think your doing? Sleeping? Well there are things to be done, it's filthy in here. Clean up."

"Ok mom," I agreed quickly, starting to pick up the imaginary trash.

"You missed a piece," She said pointing it out.

"Sorry," I mumbled.

"Don't mumble. You piece of shit. You think this'll make me proud of you? Your just a little shit, always screwing up," She slurred, hitting me across the face.

"Sorry mom. I'll try harder," I cry gently.

"You say that time and time again, but every single time I come home this place looks like shit. Get out; you're not welcome here anymore."

I nodded, and quietly packed my stuff. I found her asleep on the couch.

"Bye mom, I love you," I whispered as I walked out the door. Shutting my old life behind me.

I became cold after that, how did you bring feeling back into my life?


I never stopped to think of you
I'm always wrapped up in
Things I cannot win

I never thought my life would end up where it is. I never thought I'd be a fugitive. Luckily you changed that part of me, and instead of standing still in a cold cell thinking about this, I'm smoking a cigarette and watching the stars. You turned me around B, and made my life worth living.


You are the antidote that gets me by
Something strong
Like a drug that gets me high

You're like the Heroin I took for such a long time. Warm, dangerous and addicting. B, you're the epitome of perfection. Now all you need is someone to tell you that.


What I really meant to say
Is I'm sorry for the way I am
I never meant to be so cold

You probably don't realize how much you truly meant to me, and now that we've gone on with our lives, I realize that I made a mistake. I should've told you, but because I was afraid, I didn't, and now my chance is gone. And all I can say is sorry, even though you don't know why.

"So, I'm sorry B," I say softly to myself.


To you I'm sorry about all the lies

"Sorry for what?" Someone asks from behind me.

"Sorry for lying, sorry for being so damn bitter, sorry for never telling you how I really felt," I sighed.

"Now wouldn't that last one tie into the whole lying thing?"

I turned around and was met with green eyes, blonde hair, and a petite figure.

"B?" I stammered backing up. I felt around for anything to catch my weight.

She smirked and stepped closer to me.

"Yes Faith?" She asked walking up to me and slowly circling me as she stroked my cheek. I felt the blush rise in my face.

"I…..I….I love you Buffy," I muttered.


Maybe in a different light
You could see me stand on my own again

"You love me?" You asked slowly, almost seductively.

"Yeah, B, I do," I said the realization finally hitting me.

"Well, what If I said I love you to?" You asked pulling your face so it was close to mine.

"Then I might just have to do this," I said smirking as I kissed you. You kissed back demandingly. My hands got a grasp in your hair, and your legs were soon around my waist. I broke the kiss off, breathing heavily. "That was…..wow," I said a content look on my face.

You smiled, threw something at me, and walked off.


Cause now i can see
You were the antidote that got me by
Something strong like a drug that got me high

I looked at the card you threw at me. 'What the fuck?' I thought. It had a number, and an address on it.

Buffy Summers
School Councilor.

On the back it said. 'I thought you'd want a way to get a hold of me. Give me a call, and we'll have date or something.'

I smirked, and dialed the number that said 'Home Phone'

"Buffy Summers," You announced.

"Hey B, I thought that maybe you would want to go on a date or something." I heard you laugh on the other line.

"How does tonight sound?" You asked.

"Tonight sounds fine."


I never really wanted you to see
The screwed up side of me that I keep
Locked inside of me so deep

I met you at the Starbucks by your house.

"B, I have something that I've needed to say to you for a very long time," I sighed sitting down.

You nodded, and I went on.

I apologized for everything I had done, how I had screwed up your life, as you just sat there in silence sipping your mocha.

"Shhh…Faith, I forgive you, I forgave you a long time," You finally said, putting down your coffee. I picked mine up, getting lost in the Vanilla Latte with four shots of Espresso, and two shots of Caramel. You lowered it away from my face, and smiled gently.

"Can you see why I love you?" You asked me softly.

"No, B, why do you love me?"

"Cuz you're not afraid to be you. No matter what happens, you always show the real you, and that's the you I fell in love with," You said taking my hand in yours. I stared into your green eyes, and saw sincerity.

I reach across the table with my other hand, dropping the coffee on the table. I softly brushed over your lips, letting my fingers do the talking.

You smiled, and kissed me.


It always seems to get to me
I never really wanted you to go
So many things you should have known
I guess for me there's just no hope
I never meant to be so cold

That was so long ago, and I still can't believe your gone. I can't believe that I ever made you walk away from me.

"Faith?" You asked softly closing the door.

"Yes?" I asked quietly.

"Is something wrong?"

I sighed. "No, nothing's wrong."

"Don't shut me out!" You yelled.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry B," I cried.

"No your not, do you just not care anymore?"

I cried softly into the pillow.

"Something like that," I said coldly.

"Then I guess we're done," You said sadly, biting gently on your lip trying to stop the tears that were threatening to fall out of your eyes. I watched you pick up the stuff you had just dropped, and leave my house.

My cries were heard all the way down the street, and so were yours.

You were hit by a car that night, all because I wanted to save you. You know those slayer dreams we have? Well, I saw one, and in it you died because I couldn't let you go. And yet you died because of me anyway.

I gently touched the wording on your grave, tracing over the familiar words.

Buffy Summers
1981-2005 RIP
A statue stands in a shaded place
An angel girl with an upturned face
A name is written on a polished rock
A broken heart that the world forgot.

"I guess some things just aren't meant to be saved B," I smiled, and turned.

"See you next year."

I waved as I made my way back to my car, lighting my last cigarette, and reminiscing on the girl I loved, and lost.