"Turning Page"
It's been 10 years but that 10 years easily feels like a hundred. But don't get me wrong I'd wait so much longer for her; a hundred, thousand, a million years for her. Ever since Nessie was born I found the right place for myself and we were all happy, I was happy. No more upset, jealous Jacob who couldn't get what he wanted. I had everything, I had her.
Over the past 10 years I've been everything she needed me to be her friend, brother and above all protector. But nothing and I mean nothing could have prepared me for the next part, the next person she needed me to be in her life. And I dont want to get all proper, although that happens when you lived with the Cullens for a while, but it is truly a privilege to be able to call her mine, and to be hers.
Honestly though having her in my life has made me question what I was doing before she was even born. I had chased Bella for so long and I dont think I could ever regrett it really cause it why I am where I am today, but all the annoying suffering that all that unnecessary drama caused was something I wish I could erase.
Its sad to think but if at any time I could have just seen her coming, felt her warmth which is weird since shes a half-vampier but she was lmost as warm as me. If I could have seen the way she smiles when she blushes at the things me and Emmet say sometimes. If I could have seen her curl her lip when shes concntrating on her over-advanced work for her age. I would have known what I was living for. I would've know that there was purpose for me and I had something to fight for. Shes the reason I exsist and I wish I had known that earlier because I can't imagine living without her.
"I am the luckiest man alive to have you, do you know that" I said with nice sly smile.
"You better believe I know it" She said jokingly with a smile and I couldnt help but smile and laugh at that. That's my Nessie.
We were watching a movie together on the couch our usual cuddling position with my arm around her and her head on my chest. She looked up at me again to say something different this time, "But seriously, I'm the lucky one" Then she brought her lips up to meet mine and she kissed me, and as always it was heaven.
How is this possible? How could to people be so happy together, love so unconditionally? It felt like a cliche but really it is almost to good to be true. When I imprinted on Renesmee I knew I would be tied to her for life because I had to be, but over the years I believe that the imprint just made me stay around so that I could fall in love with her. If I hadn't imprinted neither of us would have the chance to fall in love. Thats why its my theory that the imprint just led me to her and I fell in love with her because she is truly amazing and in every way right for me.
I surrendered who I was when she was born I became a whole new person that fit in with this family, even though it is kind of a strange family but still I beacame who I acctually wanted to be and I wanted to be whatever she wanted me to be. Back in the day when she was young and we would go out hunting together she was so tough but there were always the ocassional scraches since she is half-human. She would always come to me, but she never cried about it instead she would just say, "Make it feel better" and I would laugh because I knew it didn't hurt her much at all, but those days that she appeared or even pretended to have a fragile heart mad me feel strong to know that I would be there for her always and she wanted me there too.
She pulled away from the kiss and I whined jokingly like always and she laughed, "you know you'll have my kisses forever right?" she hinted
"And thats the only thing that keeps me going" I smiled "Its why I wake up in the morning" She laughed and I smiled but we both knew It was true she was the only thing that was continuing my exsistance she was writing my life story and she was the reason I had to keep turning the page.
"Oh, I almost forgot. I have to give you your birhday present" I was Nessie's birthday tomorrow but I always liked to give her my gift early and it would be better since we had a whole bunch of leeches coming from around the world again to spend Nessie's birthday with her. After the vampiers left when they chased of the Volturi many of them kept in touch with Nessie and I cant argue with how amazing they think she is. So of course Alice is throwing a big bash for the big 1-0, double digits thing, even though she looks 18.
"My birthday is tomorrow, Jacob" she said
"You know I know that Nessie. Come on I just want to give it to you early before the house gets all crowded" I replied
"Oh yea, I almost forgot everyones coming tomorrow" She frowned and had a look of what seemed to be fear on her face
"Whats wrong? Don't want to see your foriegn friends?" I questioned
"No it not that I dont want to see them Im just kind of nervous of what they might think"
"What? that your beautiful, amazing and beautiful" She smiled and I loved when I could do that make her smile even when she was a bit down
"No I don't know what they will think about us, you know" She said as she gestured to both of us, "I mean this is the first time that they will see us together as more than just friends. Do you think they'll think it weird? are they going to want to know about imprinting? Wait do they know abut you and my mom?! this is going to be so awkward" She was franticly pacing and I thought it was unbelievably cute
"Nessie, Nessie, Calm down" I stoped her and made her face me so I could get a talk to her, "The first time I saw you I knew we would have one heck of a story to tell people and I also knew that we'd tell it well"
She smiled and said, "You're right, it is one heck of a story to tell"
"And you're uch a great stroy teller, you'll have the on their knees when you tell them this one"
We both smiled and she looked up and said, "I love you so much" and pulled me in for round number two, until we finally pulled away for air.
"I love you, too Nessie"
Lyrics
I've waited a hundred years But I'd wait a million more for you
Nothing prepared me for What the privilege of being yours would do
If I had only felt the warmth within your touch
If I had only seen how you smile when you blush
Or how you curl your lip when you concentrate enough
Well I would have known What I was living for all along What I've been living for
Your love is my turning page only the sweetest words remain
Every kiss is a cursive line Every touch is a redefining phrase
I surrender who I've been for who you are
For nothing makes me stronger than your fragile heart
If I had only felt how it feels to be yours
Well I would have known What I've been living for all along What I've been living for
Though we're tethered, to the story we must tell
When I saw you, well I knew we'd tell it well
With the whisper, we will tame the vicious scenes
Like a feather, bringing kingdoms to their knees
I've decided to start writing for the Fanfiction world. I love music and I love Jacob and Renesmee but most of all I love when I cant relate them to eachother. So this song Turning page from Sleeping at Last reminded me of their amazing love. I will do other songs and turn them into stories based on Jacob and Renesmee, Hopefully with different senarios and different attitudes but the love will be the same.
If you have good song choices that you think relate to them please give me your suggestions.
And if you read this all Thank you. I dont really think Im a great writer yet but Id like to be so Im hoping this site will help. Thanks for reading again.
Till next time