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She was sure she was loosing her mind.

Why she had even so much thought about it, she didn't know, but the fact that she was on her way to the cabin he was staying, heart thudding against her ribs as her lips were set into a straight line, ignoring the nagging voice inside her head that suspiciously sounded like Octavian, was rather mad to her.

She didn't want to get herself into any trouble, but rather wanting to settle the internal conflict between the both of them that had been going on ever since he came back after his eight-month abduction. Now that three months had passed since the defeat of Gaia, she was sick of the awkward silence when they were both left in the same room that she had to leave without a farewell at his way, his eyes bearing holes into the back of her neck. She longed for the easier times when they were comfortable in each others presence, letting their emotions show freely within the confinement of the respected privacy they had built for the past years they had known each other.

It didn't occur to her that he would get back to Camp Jupiter with her, Frank and Hazel, she thought he would have followed the others to Camp Half-Blood to where he felt he really belonged. She even wanted to ask why, but out of cowardice she hated, she locked her jaw and walked brusquely away.

But then upon seeing the state of the camp, she had a guess.

Homes and shops were destroyed, large heaps of rocks were piled, some all over the roadway. Magnificent buildings of architecture were brought down, the detailed designs that were made by the demigods all those years ago were all gone. Bodies of brave warriors were scattered everywhere, their eyes wide and blank while they lay motionlessly. What once a beautiful place, full of significant people and extraordinary things, was then the remains of a warzone.

She remembered she just stood there, trying to swallow the lump when she saw the familiar faces of people she used to pass by that felt like years ago staring lifelessly back at her. She even forgot he was there for a while until he spoke up.

"This is why," He muttered, his voice low so that the couple wouldn't hear them. "This had been my home for so long, I can't abandon it again."

His words had told her he knew that she wanted to ask, but she didn't care now since her home was destroyed too. "Don't make promises you can't keep," She replied, pushing down the bitterness that wanted to make itself show. She shot him a glance. "Do your best to the people that had hope for you."

She didn't even wait for his reply when she stormed off.

It was then they were set to work at once, helping others to clean and once in a while she poked her head in the infirmary to see the wounded, having a word with the healers about their health. There were massive amounts of paper work she and Frank had to go through, causing her to sleep at most four hours a day. Even her co-praetor had to shake her awake so that he could tell her to sleep in her room.

She didn't see Jason much, but got glances of him and Dakota helping other campers, guiding them. She saw and heard that some were still wary of him, since he had been missing while at the same time working with the Greeks. She understood what they felt, and she didn't like it.

He went back to the Greek camp twice a month, visiting Piper there, and sometimes she came by to visit him. Reyna avoided them the whole time they were together, saying she had some important things she had to do as she excused herself.

There were times he tried to speak with her.

And, she noticed how she was constantly doing it, she fled.

But now, she was going to settle this for good.

She stood in front of his door, her hand raised to knock, bottom lip gnawed at. After heaving out her breath, she rap her knuckles against the door that it rang through the night. She was thankful that her dogs weren't there with her or not they might cause a nuisance.

It took him a moment to answer, and when he did, she reminded herself not to stare.

His t-shirt was ceased with lines as his shorts hung low on his hips, blond hair in odd places that looked as if he just got out of bed. He blinked, eyes widen slightly with shock as he saw her standing there, in her jeans and favourite purple hoodie, her braid came undone with her fingers wringed together as she looked at him straight in the eye. "Reyna?"

She wetted her dried lips. "Jason," She straightened herself. "Is it a bad time to visit?"

He smiled a little. "No, I wasn't asleep if that's what you're wondering," He step aside to give her way. "Come on in."

She nodded, stepping inside the place, meeting his eyes for a moment as he closed the door, and then he led her to the kitchenette. "Hot chocolate?" He asked.

She leaned against the counter, wrapping an arm around her stomach as she dragged her eyes to look at anyway but him as he took out the mugs. "Sure."

There was a pause. "With a little coffee?"

She snapped her head towards him out of shock, where he already took out a packet of black coffee while waiting for her to reply.

"I thought you didn't like coffee," She commented quietly, trying to silence the feeling of hope before it would grow into something she didn't want to feel.

He shrugged. "I don't, but sometimes I force myself to drink them so that I stay awake," There was a quirk of his lips. "And I know how sometimes you like to mix them together."

She searched his face. "Did all your memories came back?"

He didn't immediately respond, stirring the drinks as he delayed to answer her, as if refusing to do it. As if sensing his reluctance, she narrowed her eyes. "Jason."

At her firm call, he stopped stirring, handing her the mug as he look at her straight in the eye. "It was real then?" He asked instead.

Sensing the growing dread, she dared herself to answer. "What?"

"You know what."

She gripped the mug in her hand, staring down in the contents of it. "Maybe it did, maybe it didn't," She took a sip. "Who knows? But the thing is, this has to stop. This," She gestured helplessly to the both of them. "This awkwardness, it ticks me off."

He had the cheek to smirk. "Trust you to be straightforward."

She huffed. "Well, I'm sorry that I want us to be back to normal," She winced the moment the words were out.

He gently put aside the mug, some sort of sadness flickered past his eyes. "You know it won't be the same," He reminded her softly. "I'm not exactly me anymore, I mean, the me before I was plucked off by Juno and left me in a place I don't even know," He trailed off, unable to continue as he ran his fingers through his short hair, leaning against the counter, the distance between them near enough she could feel the prickling on her skin. "I really need to know this though," He said quietly, resisting the sudden urge to brush aside the bangs on her forehead. "Did we really happen?"

"Why is it important to you?" She retorted. "You clearly see it didn't happen, or we wouldn't even have this conversation."

"Believe it or not, I'm actually worried about you, and as a friend, even if I was a shitty one for the past year, I feel obligated to ask you this question," He faced her. "Are you okay?"

Her stomach dropped at his choice of word for her, and the fact that he should know better than ask that kind of question to her. What was she going to say? She felt as if she was breaking behind those sturdy walls of hers, her resolve slowly crumbling as time passed, as she saw the man she had grown up with moved on with another woman he really loved, leaving him completely out of her reach.

She didn't want to let him know that, and she was going to keep it that way if she could help it.

She shook her head, a sardonic smile plastered on her lips. "This past couple of months? Or the whole year in general?"

His hesitance was enough to tell her he was guilty he was the cause for what she was now, for what they were now. Despite that, it wasn't mostly his fault, she couldn't really be mad at him for something he had no control over.

Which was exactly why she understood Annabeth's hatred for the goddess.

And though Juno's selfish thoughts had left them in a mess, it had saved the world from being turned into another Tartarus, along the way sacrificing some things that was precious to Reyna. She was sure the goddess wouldn't receive her forgiveness in a few decades.

She sighed, setting the mug in hand on the counter. "Tired," She replied quietly, the weariness making her shoulders slump. "Just tired."

He searched her face, and with some hesitance, lifted a hand as he pushed a strand of hair behind her ear. She froze, meeting his calm eyes with her wide ones as she stared at him, subconsciously taking a step back. A flash of pain passed through those eyes, but he managed to send her a small smile. "I can imagine that, searching for me and all. From what I heard from Dakota and Gwen, you wouldn't give up if you could, only because Octavian outvoted you," He rubbed the nape of his neck. "You've done so much for me, and I have nothing to repay you."

She shoved her hands in her sweater pockets, hiding her clenched fists. "I'd always hope you'll come back, I just couldn't accept the idea you were dead until I see a body," She ignored the uneasy feeling when she remembered how she felt during those days, how she wrecked her head by thinking about him. "And so I kept looking." She straightened herself, taking a swing of her chocolate drink before dunking the rest of the contents inside the sink.

A hand clasped over hers the moment she turned the knob of the pipe, stopping her from washing the mug. She clenched jaw, the feeling of his hand was so achingly familiar she hated it, because she didn't want to remember the time when he would grab her hand when they were younger and drag her off to somewhere. "I'll do that," He assured her, taking it away from her fingers as he just set it in the sink. "I did remember something before I was gone," He started as he turned back off the knob.

She raised an eyebrow. "Not anything delirious I hope."

He grinned. "You mean like Rey-Rey?"

"Exactly," She replied dryly. "Other than that, what is it?"

He faced her then, his eyes shone with curiosity. "I remembered that you were the last person I talked to before, you know, and I'm wondering what we were talking about back then."

She stared blankly at him. "Do you really want to know that?"

Skeptically, he rubbed his forearm. "That thought had been bugging me for a while, and I thought you could help me."

She sighed, wondering how she was going to explain it when her stomach churned. "We weren't exactly talking about anything at that time."

"Really?"

She nodded, trying to keep a straight face. "Mostly doing this."

Just when he opened his mouth to reply, she leaned up and brushed her lips against his, and he felt some sort of electricity passed through his body as she leaned back to look at his reaction, his eyes widen with complete surprise as he stared at her. "And of course," She murmured, her thumb brushed against his cheek. "I had the same reaction as you have now." She took a step back, shaking her head. "I'm sorry," She whirled around, walking out of the kitchenette without a glance at his way.

The front door slammed close the moment she had open it, causing her to stiffen for a moment. She closed her eyes, fully aware the heat of his body behind her back, his hand above her head where he had planted it on the door. She could feel his breath against her hair. "Damn it, Reyna," He whispered quite hoarsely. "You can't just do that and run away, it's cruel to a man."

She chuckled breathlessly, her eyes fluttering open. "You should know by now I have no mercy to those who hurt me," She shot him a glance. "Let me through, Jason."

The hand on the door then slid onto her shoulder, turning her towards him. "It almost happen," It wasn't exactly a question, more of a statement if anything else. "How I wanted us to be more, but didn't get a chance to and instead hurting you in the process," He used the same hand to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear. He gave a rueful smile. "It sounds all to planned out for me."

She nodded. "Now you know," She replied monotonously, out of habit to block anyone out if she didn't want them to know of what she felt inside. She looked away. "Our lives had been gambled."

He searched her face, before backing off slowly so that she could go. Seeing her chance, she yanked open the door and got out. She was only a few steps forward when he called out.

"Do you think we'll still be friends, or just stuck at acquaintances?"

Turning her head, she saw that he was leaning against the door frame, arms crossed against his chest. She held his gaze. "We know each other too well to be acquaintances," She stated in a matter of fact, dragging her eyes away from him and instead stared at her shoes. "You should know that by now."

"Too well that we actually became lovers?"

She shot him a glare, before it was smothered into a look of remorse when he met her gaze unwaveringly, those blue eyes held softness and sadness for her. "Yeah," She sighed. "Too well."

She then walked away, leaving him staring after her as his heart lurched out for her.