By Mera!
"By tonight, it wouldn't matter anymore…"
He paused, the clicking of keys dying off as the small room filled with silence. The entire apartment was quiet, oppressive.
A tomb.
Frowning, he glanced at his clock. He should have been back by now… Then he saw the date, one that caught his breath as he stood up. His word document watched him go, its endless pages all filled with the same thing, over and over…
Shuichi'sgoneShuichi'sgoneShuichi'sgoneShuichi'sgoneShuichi'sgone…
He walked into the kitchen, grabbing a beer from the fridge and popping the tab. He drank deeply, the bitter amber liquid sliding over his tongue and down his throat. Turing his new story over in his mind, he swore. He'd written himself into a corner. The two characters were so in love, but only one of them ever said it. The other refused and ended up killing his lover before he could say the words.
Laughing, he drained his beer. Mizuki'd straighten it out… Yuki Eiri's greatest masterpiece… Setting his empty can on the counter, he headed for the bathroom.
"By tonight, it wouldn't matter anymore." He crooned as he started running water into the bathtub.
He stripped, folding all of his clothes neatly into a pile. Long fingers fished out a cigarette and his lighter as he slid into the scalding water.
He flicked the lighter no, inhaling the blue-grey smoke deeply. His thumb played over the worn sticker on the lighters surface. He gazed at it for a long moment before placing it reverently on top of his clothes.
Violet eyes watched him.
Reaching the end of his cigarette, he put it out and reached for the blade as he had done so many times before. Today, the blade would touch skin, biting deep and feasting on red blood.
Today was the anniversary of Shuichi leaving him. Like Ryuichi, he was in America now… but he was everywhere here too…
He couldn't take it anymore.
As the blade touched his skin, time seemed to freeze. All he could hear was the sound of his blood rushing through his ears; could only feel the cool sharpness of the blade…
"Yuki!" A choked cry. A blur of red and pink, violet and jean came rushing into the bathroom. The blade was jerked away and he found himself staring into wide, frightened, and then angry eyes.
The hand that had been holding the blade came up to touch the face in front of him, trembling.
"Shu? Shu?" He whispered hoarsely, thumb tracing over the features he knew so well. He had changed, grown up a bit. They had both changed…
"I'm back, Yuki… I'm sorry." Shuichi murmured, cradling his lovers blonde head close. "We needed time, I needed time… I should have…"
"Shut up." Yuki growled, clutching him closer, desperate for the contact. "It's my fault… I pushed you too far…" He laughed a harsh, bitter sound. "I lost you."
"Shhh…" A gentle murmur. Violet eyes locked on gold. "I still love you, Yuki. I'll always love you."
By tonight, it wouldn't matter anymore. The time apart, the hurt didn't matter.
They just were again, and it was enough.