The funny thing is that Lexa grew up hearing about all the amazing things the world reserved to her, listening stories about love and pain, sacrifice and courage, beauty and souls, she felt ready, she thought she could easily face the world with her fair share of pain and pleasure.
But she didn't expect that a simple smile, with a couple of crystal blue eyes, could make her feel so stunned, as if the world had stopped turning. Despite the state she was in, she could hear in her head the voice of her mother scream «That is, sweetheart, what I meant when I was talking about the wonders of the world! »
She was in the hallway, with Anya, hearing her rambling about the biology classe in background, while she admired like an idiot the most beautiful girl she'd ever laid her eyes on, but the thing that she couldn't explain was that irrepressible desire to know her , the awareness that even though she was a perfect stranger, Lexa knew it was not just simply physical attraction.
«You could even pretend to be interested in my vital problems.» Anya grumbled.
«I could, but that would require a huge effort.» Lexa said without blinking.
Anya, being Anya, didn't think twice about hitting Lexa strong enough to make her wince.
«Ow! What the hell?! Did you need to hit me?! »
«You're lucky I didn't hit you with the biology book! Sure there was a need, I spoke for fifteen minutes and you haven't heard a single word! You're lucky that they were nonsense. »
«Nonsense ?! What on earth would you have done to me if they had been real vital problems ?! »
«Do you want to try?» Anya asked with a smile on her face.
«I need to find a good doctor for your mental problems, really, I wonder why our parents haven't done nothing about it yet.» Lexa growled softly, but loud enough to be heard by Anya.
Anya rolled her eyes and quickly asked «So .. Since you weren't listening to me, what were you thinking about? I was serious about those fifteen minutes. »
«That wasn't fifteen minutes, stop being so drama queen, by the way I wasn't thinking about anything in particular.»
Anya rolled her eyes, it was always like this with Lexa, you could say that something was going through her head, but you never knew what, as long as she would not have decided to talk about her initiative.
The bell rang just when Lexa ended the sentence, both girls made their way to their English literature class and Lexa noticed the person had distracted her for the last fifteen minutes - according to what Anya said, but Lexa strongly doubted they were still fifteen minutes - there with two other girls who until then she hadn't even seen, she also noticed that as they passed near the group of girls, Anya greeted the girl with the breathtaking smile , while Lexa was paying attention to the bright smile directed to them , well, to Anya.
In that exactly moment when they made eye contact , Lexa remained with her usual stoic face, without transpire nothing , even if in that exactly moment, she felt the happiest person in the world because, dammit, this beautiful girl was aware about her existence.
But , of course there is a but , because even if she doesn't showed what she felt inside, that is a storm, Lexa could hear everything that she had inside and she felt so exhilarated that she was stumbling over her own feet, recovering enough in a hurry not to find herself with her face to the ground, but still making herself an idiot. Lexa had to listen to Anya giggle up to class.
When they arrive in the classroom, both girls took their places in the back row. After twenty minutes of class, Lexa thought it might be better to pay a little 'attention to the lesson rather than think of a perfect stranger.
She has failed miserably, but at least she tried.
«So, won't you tell me what you were thinking about earlier?»Anya asked, once she entered at Lexa's room, throwing herself on the bed.
Lexa was at her desk watching the latest Harry Potter film, she had delayed it so much to feel almost guilty. She pretended not to hear her, she didn't want to tell Anya .. What exactly? Because she didn't even know what she was thinking about and she certainly didn't know in what way to put it, so she pretended to nothing, until she heard a pillow thrown at her head.
«What?!» asked Lexa, giving up at the obstinacy of her sister.
«Why don't you want tell me?»
«Because I haven't the slightest idea of how to explain the feeling I had, okay? Nothing serious » Lexa said, pausing to reflect on her own words.
«I don't know if I should worry or let it go» she mused Anya.
«I say to let it go» she muttered Lexa, returning to her film and trying to concentrate.
Anya rolled her eyes «What you say doesn't matter, you're irrelevant in these cases. But for now I leave you alone. For now.»
«You're still here though.» she replied Lexa, grumbling.
Anya threw another pillow against her sister and then left the room with a smile on her face.
Once Lexa heard the door closed, she thought why she couldn't express herself about what she felt today when saw that girl, that smile.. Because she always could describe what she thought , especially with her sister, but this time.. It felt different and it was so stupid, so inexplicable, because even if she tried to deny it, all led back to the unknown one that she couldn't even describe.
It was after less than 12 hours since she had seen her, and she already felt that she was going crazy.
If she had to be honest with herself, she would admit that she was going crazy after fifteen minutes spent watching her, but this time she decided it was better to lie to herself.