Author's notes: So I've been sitting on this idea since immediately after playing Episode 3, and I've finally gotten around to writing it out :P Special shout out to my friend Art for helping me making the final few paragraphs not completely shit :)
She felt cold, as though she was standing against a wall of ice. Stumbling forward, hands guiding her along, they reached a door, Violet listening as it creaked open slowly. Clementine's soft voice was next to her ear now, leading her inside, before the door eventually seemed to click shut behind them.
The pain was still too much, like someone had knives buried into Violet's eyes and was twisting them. The mental image the thought left behind was enough to have her heart beating against her chest, harsh memories that wouldn't go away no matter how hard Violet tried to get rid of them. She held onto Clementine's arm as the other girl escorted her deeper into the room, setting her down on a soft surface: a bed.
The air felt as frozen as she was, a brisk breeze hitting her face from her right. The window. Footsteps shuffled across her floor, a small breath reaching her ears. Clementine had been holding her breath, apparently, yet insisted on letting only a fraction out at a time. She was pacing around the room, and Violet lifted her head away from where she assumed her legs would be and towards the source of the footsteps.
They stopped suddenly, and her cheeks burned as she felt cold fingers against the right side of her face, like Clementine was looking her over. A finger drew too close to the bandages covering her eyes, and she winced, almost pulling away.
"Shit," Clementine let the word out in a hushed breath, her fingers lifting away from Violet's face. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean-"
"Pull the mouthy one out of her cell."
Violet recoiled as the metal door was thrown open, her back against the wall as that fucking asshole grabbed her by the arm. She let out a cry, clawing at the woman, but it all proved fruitless. All she could do was watch as the woman's knife was held against her throat, Lilly focusing her attention towards her before shifting back in Clementine's direction in the other cell, who was practically screaming at the woman now. Shouting something that was indistinguishable, lost in the noise.
Oh, how she wished that she'd just kept her mouth shut.
Violet pulled herself out of the memory before she could reach the end, wishing that she could close her eyes, though the pain would prevent that from ever happening. Not tonight.
Instead, she tried her damndest to put on a smile, the whole thing feeling just as droopy as she felt. She took in a deep breath, focusing on where Clementine had last spoke. "I'm okay." Her words sounded hollow even to her.
She could almost see Clementine shaking her head, refusing to believe that for a second. There was another shuffle, then the mattress sunk next to her. "I… I should've let AJ kill her." Guilt riddled her tone, Violet's smile falling back into the frown that so often lived on her face. This wasn't the same girl she'd met weeks ago, the one that brought Violet hope that they'd find a way out of this. The girl left in her place was bitter, angry, too much like herself.
She reached out into the void, finding Clementine's hand resting against the girl's leg, squeezing it. "She isn't coming back, Clementine." Violet's voice had an edge to it, reassurance that she'd done the right thing. Their boat was gone, and Lilly was either dead or limping back home and it didn't even matter because they weren't ever going to come back. She was sure of it. She took in a deep breath, teeth grazing her lip as she mulled over words to say, words that'd clear Clementine's conscience.
In the end, they both had baggage they'll never get rid of. Words wouldn't help, but she wanted to believe that they could.
"You did what you thought was right. You kept AJ safe. That's what matters. Okay?" The very thought of him getting hurt because of her… what kind of person would she be if she'd let that happen?
She was a troubled youth, not heartless.
"You got everyone home," she finally stated, those words seeming to lift a weight off of her shoulders. She'd put so much stress on herself to make sure they'd make it through this alive, to the point that she'd blow up at the littlest things if it meant they were vulnerable because of it. Her efforts, though, did little to stop Lilly and her people. It was Clementine who managed to do that.
Clementine's hand shook in her own, and after a moment, she slowly pulled away. Her eyes were undoubtedly focused on the floor, breathing in through her nose before letting it out in a near-silent exhale.
"Doesn't feel like it."
"Hey…" Violet turned to look towards Clementine, the blackness of the world taking away any actual attempt at doing so. The lopsided smile returned as Violet laid her hands in her lap, wringing them together. "Aren't you supposed to be consoling me?"
A pleasant sound reached her ears in response, a soft chuckle that was somewhere between warm and nervous. It was obvious that the guilt Clementine felt wasn't going to go away just like that, but it was a step in the right direction.
A silence filled the air in the seconds that followed, one that seemed more content than the silence that preceded their conversation. Fingers touched her hand suddenly, the action almost sending her heart into her throat. It only took a second to calm down, about the same amount of time it took Clementine to interlock her fingers with her own.
"Come on. I want to show you something."
The warmth in Clementine's voice was more than enough to win her over, and she allowed the girl to help her stand. She wanted to make another playful jab at her, ask how she'd show her anything when she couldn't see, but ultimately chose not to. It'd be in bad taste anyway, right?
Instead, she put one foot in front of the other, keeping up with Clementine as she was led back out into the hallway. Eventually, they reached another door, one that she knew to lead outside. The harsh wind confirmed her theory, the wet grass beneath her feet squishing with every step. It wasn't long before they stopped, and Clementine helped her sit on a stone surface. The steps leading into the admin building.
The faint crackle of torches reached her ears, accompanied by a chorus of crickets and the occasional hoot of an owl. On nights like this, the noise of the outside world kept her up at night, tossing and turning in an empty bed, but hearing them now… it was relaxing; hearing them reminded her that the world still existed. Shrouded in darkness, but still very much there. It was comforting, in its own way.
Clementine let go of her hand then, setting herself down next to her. The girl's boots scraped against the stone, attempting to get the mud off of her boots, Violet assumed. Seconds passed, and the silence was broken once more, Clementine's soft voice practically in her ear.
"The stars are out again tonight," she breathed, though her voice sounded breathless at the same time. Violet craned her neck to look upward, imagining the starscape she'd shared with Clementine merely a few nights ago. A smile crept on her face as she remembered that tiny pin she'd made, the one that she was absolutely sure her girlfriend was wearing right now. Clementine cleared her throat, shifting in her spot next to her. "You showed me a bunch of constellations before… now it's my turn, yeah?"
Violet almost chuckled, smiling like the idiot she often felt like in these moments. She only wished that she could see her face, to see if Clementine was doing the same. Just like before. "I thought you couldn't remember them?" She asked quietly, almost teasingly.
"Nothing says I can't make up my own, too," Clem stated through a smile, a chuckle of her own reaching Violet's ears. "So that's what I'm going to do."
"Okay, uh… look in this direction." Clementine's fingers touched the back of her head, guiding her to look towards their right. "It's a wolf. Kind of like… a small one, too." She explained. Violet tried to imagine what it looked like, like a bunch of dots etched into a sheet of graph paper. The fangs were sharp, and it seemed ready to pounce on whatever prey its pack had found.
"Its mother is a little ways up a bit, protecting the pup from hunters," Clementine continued. "This happens so often that the pup bares his teeth any time a threat comes along. Fearless, just like his mom. One time, he managed to kill a hunter while he's distracted, and the mother was worried how the humans would retaliate. They're angry, and force the two wolves to flee. One of the hunters decides to stop the others from chasing them-"
Through all of this, Violet had an amused smile on her face, realizing quickly where Clementine had been going with this. She shook her head slightly, turning to 'look' towards Clem. "So you're fearless, huh?"
"Uh, yeah. I am," came the response, tone light and dripping with the girl's signature sarcasm. Violet snorted, ready to roll her eyes.
"Alright, so, the wolf pup is our badass AJ," Violet concluded, scooting closer to Clementine as the wind began to pick up speed. "What else you got for me?"
"Uhm…" The girl's mind was practically turning their gears aloud, an almost amusing thought that distracted Violet more than enough to almost miss what she said next. "There's, uh… a watch." Violet raised an eyebrow, trying to imagine what that'd even look like in star form and coming up short. A gigantic space clock… it was almost too amusing to take seriously. "The watch belonged to a wise man…" Clementine continued, sighing. "In his world, violence and chaos was… everywhere. But he chose not to be a part of it. Tried to bring everyone together, even when it seemed hopeless. The wise man took care of a young girl, who's caretakers were… lost. He vowed to take care of her, and to help her find them again." Her voice grew shakier with each passing word. "One day, his students were forced onto the road, and everything began to fall apart. But… he didn't give up. Kept them going. They reached a desolate city at the edge of the world, hoping to find an escape, but it was taken away, along with the girl. The wise man tried to find her, and…"
Her voice trailed off, leaving them in the calm ambiance of the crickets once more. Violet opened her mouth to say something, letting it close just as quickly. This wasn't about Lee, was it…? The man that took care of her…? She ran both of her hands through her hair, thinking and thinking about what to say, but was there anything she could? Losing someone you cared about like that… it was something she could relate to, but that didn't make it any easier to talk about.
"Wish I'd gotten to meet him," Violet finally stated in an even tone, letting out a quick puff of air from her nostrils, hoping it'd relieve the tension building up in her.
"He was the best." Clementine let her words hang in the air, shifting in her spot next to Violet, as though she was wrapping her arms around her knees. "He would've probably talked Lilly down. Somehow. He was good at that."
The stinging feeling in her eyes only reminded Violet that 'talking her down' was never an option, but she let Clementine have that thought untainted. Despite those troubled thoughts brewing beneath the surface, Violet smiled, her hand softly holding onto Clementine's shoulder. She lifted her head towards the stars again, imagining the watch in all of its glory, and the man who wore it.
Who knows. Maybe he could've done the impossible.
After a brief pause, she turned towards her girlfriend once more, running a hand through her messy hair. "Are those even real constellations? Or are you just bullshiting me?"
The girl laughed, a welcome sound after how heavy things had just gotten. "Nah, I'm, uh… I'm just bullshitting you," she finally admitted, a smile evident in her voice. "Did you, um, like it, though? I'm not exactly a storyteller…"
Violet answered her question by twisting herself to look in the girl's direction, slowly wrapping her arms around her in a tight embrace. Clementine seemed to tense up for an instant, relaxing just as quickly. When she hugged her back, Violet laid her head against the girl's shoulder, ignoring the stinging feeling emanating from her eyes.
"Thank you, Clem. For sharing that with me. I mean it." She mumbled the words into the girl's neck, their embrace only growing tighter in response.
Clementine's words were barely audible, her voice cracking. "I won't let what happened to him happen to you…"
Those words washed over her like cold water, the weight of them almost excruciatingly heavy. Violet pulled away, clutching onto Clementine's shoulders with ferocity, and if she still had her sight… she wouldn't hesitate to look her in the eye.
Suddenly, the cold, inky-black darkness didn't matter that much anymore.
Words failed her, but she didn't need them. She pulled her girlfriend into a tighter hug, intent on never letting her go until she accepted that that was never going to happen.
Even if they sat here all night. Looking at the stars.