Hello everyone :)

I am very new to casualty fics, but after last night's episode I felt I needed to write something. Next Saturday is so far away. I am a bit rusty, haven't written in English in almost two years (am a proud Dutchie), so hopefully my English isn't that bad.

Anyway, enjoy!

The sole of her ankle boots made an squeaking sound on the asphalt, slowly echoing away behind sirens and old wheelchairs. Paramedics were unloading patients out of the bright coloured ambulances, sometimes being assisted by the porters or healthcare assistants. It was business as usual, she would say. Like yesterday never happened.

Rain dropped on her leather jacket, its rhythm representing an catchy song from the Caribbean. She took in the fresh air before making her way towards the entrance of Holby ED. Another day, another step away from the disastrous shift she had yesterday.

"Morning", Zoe greeted her, a coffee in one hand and an cigarette in the other. "How are you?"

She didn't feel like small talk this morning, even though Zoe only wanted to be her friend. She shrugged. "Getting there."

"You'll be alright, Rita."

"Yeah, hope so."

"And did you take my advice?" Rita looked at her friend. "The TLC, I mean."

Rita bit her lip, holding back any emotions that would tell her how she felt. How she felt this very minute, but also last night when the tears finally came. Last night she decided to distract herself with a stupid chick flick on television, hoping that it would make her forget her own sorrows. But she couldn't be more wrong. Everything came back to haunt her the moment she went to bed, closing her eyes for the first time that day.

She shook her head. "No, he couldn't be bothered." The words came out cold, heartless. Like Mark had told her last night.

"So where did you go last night?"

"Home."

"Alone?" She didn't say anything, simply looking at the hospital walls looming up before her. She couldn't look at her friend, she would burst into tears if she did. "Oh, Rita", Zoe said. She felt Zoe's hand rest on her shoulder, squeezing it for moral support. "You should have called me. I would have come, you know."

She managed to produce a soft, polite smile. "Yeah, I know."

She walked passed reception, greeting Jack and Noel with an simple nod. She was about to push the double doors open, when Jacob beat her to it. His white uniform was spotless, a contrast to the patients in the waiting room, covered in fluids that no-one had mentioned in medical books. "Right, you are just the person I need", he said, pointing his finger at Rita. "We've got an RTC. Public bus full of elderly coming in. ETA 10 minutes."

"Well", Zoe said, drinking her last bit of coffee. "Let's start, shall we?"

She didn't say anything. She went straight to the changing room, getting in her uniform. She put her own clothes in her locker, hoping that everything from yesterday's shift would stay there as well. Her patients would need her today. They needed a professional, be someone who didn't bring their personal life to work. She looked at the mirror one more time, putting her blond hair in an simple bun.

The double doors of the Holby ED swung open, revealing Iain and Jez transporting a distressed patient. The wheels of the gurney swiftly moving across the ED floor, passing several members of the hospital staff and their patients. The lively colour of the human skin had faded away, leaving the woman pale, almost lifeless. A man, dressed in a suit, held her hand, his face covered in fear.

"This is Susan Davidson, 37 year old", Iain started. "Her husband Frank had found in the bathroom crying. She had some vaginal blood loss. She is 30 weeks pregnant."

"Straight to resus." Zoe said, grabbing the small paper file containing important patient information. "Jacob, would you take Mr. Davidson to the relatives room, please?"

"Please, I need to be with my wife", the man said, desperation clearly audible in his voice.

"I understand, Mr. Davidson", Rita said, stepping in. In some way she could understand how this man felt right now. The love he had for his wife was evident in his eyes, mixed with fear. "But let the doctors do their job. We will keep you updated, I promise." She smiled softly, before turning to Jacob. "If you please, Jacob."

Rita made her way to resus, opening the doors to see the woman being transferred to an ED bed. Zoe took the stethoscope from her neck and started to listen to the woman's heart. She positioned herself next to her friend, trying to avoid any contact with Iain. In the corner of her eyes she saw he was trying to make eye contact, but she wasn't in the mood.

She walked over to the supplies, getting all the material she needed. "Rita." He called her name, just loud enough for her to hear, no-one else. But she couldn't talk to him right now. Distance was the best she could do right now. She would deal with it after shift.

"Alright, I need IV access fast, before she gets into shock." Zoe started to take the lead, giving Rita an knowing look, signalling she noticed lack of contact between her and Iain. "I need an ultrasound. I want to know if there is any placental abruption. Get me some bloods as well, cross match six units. Page an obstetrician."

Rita took the hand of the woman in hers, letting her know she wasn't alone. "It's okay, Susan", she said softy, causing her to smile. Even if it was very faintly. She looked away, a flash of green disappearing behind the double doors. She closed her eyes for a brief moment, swallowing her emotions away. Taking a deep breath she opened them again. Her focus would solely on her patient.

Her ballpoint-pen moved swiftly across the patient file, the information of the patient permanently transferred to the paper. She closed it, giving it to Jack before getting another one. They had stabilized the woman in resus, moving her to a single room for monitoring while she waited for a bed upstairs. A woman in her condition should have some privacy, together with her husband. Rita pressed her lips together, the image of the distraught husband still in the back of her mind. She shook her head, an attempt to get rid of it.

"Jez, can you take this one?" The sounds of the busy ED fainted to the background, but somewhere his voice would always stand out.

"Sure." Jez started walking to cubicles. "This is Holly Fisher, 21 years old."

She could feel his eyes burn a hole in the back of her head. Even though she didn't see him, she could feel him closing in on her. The smell of his cologne was intoxicating. It once made her feel liked, loved even. But now, now it felt like it tried to kill her, poison her when she was at her weakest. It reminded her of something she missed last night. That smell would tell her he was there, that she wasn't alone.

"Hey", he started casually. "You haven't texted me back." His words were merely an statement, the underlying question very much evident to her.

She didn't look up. "Yeah", she said with an flat voice. "Been busy."

Silence reigned between for a moment. Iain didn't know what to say, his dark brows furrowed. "Is there something wrong?", he asked bluntly.

She looked up, a mix of surprise and boyish innocence written all over his face. "No, everything is fine." She tried to make it more convincing by flashing him her polite smile. Something she became rather good at when she was still with Mark.

"Alright", he said. "Coming to the pub tonight?"

"No."

She picked up the patient file and moved to her office. Her sorrow was mixed with anger, creeping up on her like a thief in the night. How could he not notice? How could he not see that she needed him last night? And why, why on earth would he ignore her text? Why could he not support her, like husband Frank was supporting his wife in resus?

She closed her office behind her, silence taking over.

So, what do you think? I have two more chapters for this fic, which I will (hopefully) be posting during the rest of the week. A review would be much appreciated. Thank you for reading.