This will most probably be a very short story with very short chapters. This is something that wants out of my head and nothing I have spent any time thinking on or analyzing hence why it will be short and not thoroughly worked through.
Hope you will enjoy it anyway!
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The tears are running down my cheeks, I can feel them going down the length on my neck down my collarbone. They are silent tears, not making a sound as they come out of my eyes. I'm slowly sipping on the glass of white wine I hold in my hand, this is my third glass today and It's not helping my thoughts, emotions or rationality.
I'm usually a very composed person, doesn't let anything show on the out side and no matter how painful It is to keep everything in it's how I was raised and learned to do. But today I'v made an exception to my unwritten rule, today I'm ignoring everything and I'm showing everything and the result of it are the tears that are running from my eyes and the hate that makes them glow.
Out side the window everything is so green, you take it all for granted, the colors we see, you never think about how beautiful it is or how lucky we are that can see it at all. The forest I'm looking at has so many different shades of green that I can't tell them all apart. The window is cracked and I can feel the warm breeze on my face, smelling the damp air that has that distinctive smell of summer, but all it really is, is just the smell of our compost around the house. While I'm sitting here sipping my wine and looking out at the forest feeling sorry for myself and my daughter, my husband is sitting on the edge of the bed behind me with his face in his hands, he's crying too.
Something in this marriage wasn't working and I wasn't sure what it was but now I know. This is the first time in our three years together that I have cried in front of him and he doesn't seem to care. I have never felt such a sadness in my heart as I do now and I have never harbored such a rage in my body as I do now, maybe that is why I don't care that he's sitting right behind me crying and sobbing, maybe it's because of that rage for revenge that I feel a small hint of happiness that he is as broken from this as I am, but he have no one else but himself to blame.
Loyalty has always been important for me. I would also say trust, but trust is something I've always had a problem with, because I always seems to trust the wrong people, and as a result I never really trust anyone and I can admit to that being an fault in our marriage but that is not why we are sitting here today.
With a sigh I carefully dry the remains of tears off my cheek and slowly turn around in my chair. I put the now empty glass on the table beside me and rise so I can walk out of the room. In the doorway I slowly turn around and look into his eyes and I make a silent promise to myself that I will never come back, that he will never again touch or even see our child, and that he will pay for this dearly, with his life.