This is a "what if" story set in New Moon on page 377. If you remember from the book, Bella has decided to tell Jacob about her past experiences. In this one-shot, Alice did not see Bella jump from the cliff, so Edward never came back. Yes, I have finished the series, and I know the ending of the book. I was rereading it, and this came up. Also, I am on Team Jacob, but I ship Bella and Edward, so this was a little strange for me to write. Please R&R! -KTBG

NOTE: The first four lines are copied from the book.

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse, or Breaking Dawn.

The Voice

"Be happy," he told me.

I froze.

Jacob felt me stiffen and released me automatically, reaching for the door.

Wait, I wanted to say. Just a minute. But I was still locked in place, listening to the echo of Edward's voice in my head.

Gripping the handle, Jacob pulled it to open my truck's door. A rush of crisp, stormy wind burst through the opening, filling the truck. I barely felt it, caught up in my wonderful delusion.

"Bella, are you okay?" I heard Jacob's husky voice ask, interrupting my blissful echo. Looking over at my friend, I nodded, knowing what to do.

"Jacob...Close the door..." I choked, taking a few breaths to sooth my burning throat. He did as I said, and the gust of air suddenly disappeared. My trembling voice started talking before I wanted it to. "I need to, uh, t-talk to you." A spark of confusion flashed in his dark eyes. I took a deep breath, letting the air fill me up, then letting it out slowly, wanting to have time to think my words through.

"Is something wrong?" Jacob asked, worry etched into his tone. "Did I say something?"

"No...No," I said weakly. Turning my head, I looked into Jacob's eyes, preparing myself. "Jacob, I don't want to be cruel to you, anymore." More confusion appeared in his expression, but it was like I offended him.

"Bella, honey, you haven't been cruel to me in any way. I only acted the way I did today because you scared the crap out of me. I wasn't mad, I sw-"

"I don't mean it like that," I interrupted, hearing his misunderstanding. "I mean..." Sighing, I let it out, "Jake...I need to say something..."

"You can tell me anything, Bells," he whispered, the warm rush of his breath hot on my face.

"Jake..." I'll just go right out and say it, I thought to myself with a glance at my truck's floor. "Edward l-left me." The high of his velvet whisper was gone. Wrapping my arms around my wet chest, I tried to hold the raw edges of the hole together at the mention of his beautiful name.

Jacob's face hardened slightly. "I know," he stated. His voice had hardened, too.

"No, you don't. Jake, I'm never going to be the same, but...I think...I think it's time that I moved on." Something glittered in Jacob's eyes. It was hope. "Jacob, I'm going to tell you some things. Please," I begged, "don't think I'm crazy, okay?"

A rumble resembling a laugh shook in his chest. "Why would I think that?"

"You'd be surprised..." I murmured under my breath. "Anyway, Jake, when he-" I couldn't think his name. "-left, a...a big hole grew in my chest. That's why I hug myself when I think of him. I hurts too much. It feels like I'm being ripped apart..." My eyes flickered to Jacob's hand, which was clenched into a fist. Looking back up, I saw he was grinding his teeth, too. Amazingly, I felt even hotter than when he was normally around me. How was that possible?

"Is that it? He just hurt you so badly that you can barely breathe anymore?" Jacob huffed in anger.

"Not exactly," I admitted, feeling the redness in my face heat my nose. "The reason why I asked you to fix those bikes was, well, because I wanted to be reckless...and stupid." I decided to finish the quote.

"Why?" Jake breathed.

"When he-" A twinge of pure pain arose around the raw edges once more. "-was about to leave, he made me promise not to do anything dumb. But I rode those bikes, anyway. And this is also why I jumped off that cliff." I took another deep breath, bracing for his reaction. "I wanted to be reckless and stupid...because, if I did..." I licked my lips and closed my brown eyes. "...I would hear his voice in my head." Opening my lids slowly, I saw Jacob was emotionless. Not even a twitch of the lip at the sound of my craziness.

We were silent for a while after my confession. The sound of the wind outside was intertwined with the gentle sound of our inhales and exhales. Did he think I was insane, or was he contemplating what I meant? Either way, the silence was driving me nuts.

"Jake?" I finally whimpered. "Are you okay?"

"How can you love him?" was his response. I swept my arms around my torso at his words. He didn't even look up, the dark pupils glued to the floor of my truck.

"Jacob, please," I begged. No reply. I guess he needed another explanation. I owed him tons. "Jake...I really don't know why. I really don't, but I know I do."

"You're never going to forget him." I knew it wasn't a question.

"No," I sighed. "Never."

Jacob's sleek black sheet of hair swayed as he brought his face up to look me in the eyes. "Are you ever going to love anyone again?"

"Jake, you know I love you." I bit my lip, knowing where this was going. But wasn't that exactly why I'd told him all those crazy confessions in the first place? If so, why did this feel so...unplanned?

"Not the same way," he said with grave eyes.

I thought the skin was going to tear as I dug my teeth deeper into my bottom lip. I unwrapped my arms and took Jacob's face in my hands, feeling the burn of the touch instantly. "Jacob, no, but it is time for me to move on with my life. And, Jake, I want you to be happy."

"I want you to do only what makes you happy, Bells," he sighed.

"You make me happy, Jacob. Happier than I've been in months." Tears began to swell in my eyes, and I noticed the same happened to him. And we remained that way until deep into the dimness of dusk, where Charlie's headlights broke through the rain.

"Be happy," the voice sang again.

"I am," I whispered.