Hi all!

This is a new story of mine based on some happenings in Moon Child, and my take on the thoughts of the characters ofSho and Kei.

This will be a 6 part story, this being part 1. I hope you enjoy! It does/will contain shounen-ai, and yaoi in later chapters. May write my first ever lemon later too... But we'll see.

Enjoy!

Kei:

It's the day after we went to see Yi-Che's painting at the park, and I'm sitting on my red seat. I suppose nothing out of the ordinary...but something just seems... I don't know... weird... Last night would have been a normal, unimportant night for me... One more night in my endless existence... except last night I noticed the growing tension between you and me... I don't know if the tension is more on my part than yours... but all I know is that it's there - and getting worse...

I found, that for me it started long ago... When I started feeling things for you Sho, that I knew I shouldn't... After all, I am a vampire, while I live on, you will eventually die... I close my eyes. It's a thought I don't like lingering on... I've watched you grow since you was a mere child... I held you when you cried... watched over you through the nights... and taught you how to fight... I've put so much into you... I've grown attached... and over the years... I've grown to love you... more than I should... And now, more recently... I've watched the looks between you and Yi-Che... And it tares me apart... Not that I'll ever show it of course... It's not in my character.

I open my eyes and look blankly ahead. I know you're standing by the window to the side of me, where the partition between our room is... The curtains, as usual are shut since its daylight outside. "How is it?" I ask weakly. I hear you move slightly and open the curtains a bit to look out. Even from where I'm sitting I can tell that it's lovely weather. The brightness that fills parts of the room hurts my eyes a little, compared to the comfort of the once darkened room. "Lovely weather..." You reply after a moments look outside. I can hear the slight disappointment in your voice followed by the slight shuffle of your steps as you move to lean against the wall opposite the window. You wanted me to go to Yi-Che's big day with you... but obviously, I won't be if it's nice outside.

I downcast my eyes as I breathe a few sighs. I feel very tiered recently. "Really." I reply looking up. "Perfect for Yi-Che's big day." I announce. With that I take a long blink, gathering some strength before heaving myself out of the chair, shoving my hands in my pockets, and heading past you, into the other room where my lounge-bed is. I suffle to the far wall and look into the room where I just was, through the silver bars, which act like a piece of art as well as a partition. I can hear that you've moved from your position against the wall to sit on the seat near the silver bars.

"Kei..." You start softly. I know instantly you're going to say something I'm probably not going to like. "Unm..." Is all I offer to show I heard. "You don't drink blood these days..." The way you softly says those words makes me want to be sick. Of course I don't. I don't like what I am or what I do. I live by feeding on the blood of those who live. It's selfish and sickening... You don't understand - yet you keep asking me these questions! You can bearly stomache me doing it anymore. The first time you saw me do it, when you were so young, was the first and last time. I swore it would be. But still, there are times I forget, and come home drunkenly with blood on my clothes and mouth. It's not the first time you've had to clean me up. And I never forgot your face when you were doing it Sho.

"Its none of your business." I brush it off, with an 'I don't want to talk about it' undertone in my voice. But you, being the stubborn person, I know and love, won't let it rest. Stubourn ass. "But you're so weak..." I whirl around to face you through the bars, and cut you off sharply before you can say more. "Should I drink yours?" You don't even look at me. I feel dizzy and my knees are weak from that small spin, so I quickly flop down to sit on the edge of my bed. Despite the feelings within me I continue looking at you steadily, trying to stay composed. I can feel how weak I am. I'm sweating from the small amount of effort I put into just moving around the flat we share. But you don't need to know just how bad I am... although I have a feeling you can tell.

I take my hands out of my pockets and place them flat on the bed to steady myself. I shouldn't have snapped... but... I close my eyes while I take a breath to clear my spinning head, before leaning forward, placing one elbow on my knee and lifting my hand to my mouth as I go off in thought. "I live by draining the lives of others." I say matter of factly, with self loathing evident in my soft, weak voice. "You know what that's like?" I ask, my eyebrows slightly raised. "That's my entire life." I close my eyes for a second before continuing softly. "Sometimes I can't bear it." I flinch as I think about all the people I've had to kill to live. I can see each face, of every person I drained, clear in my mind. And there is never a day that goes by that I don't think about them in some way. It makes me want to cry - and I have to swallow hard in case my voice breaks. I haven't cried over it yet, and I don't intend to start.

I bite the side of my thumb. "So I go without." I gaze in front of me, blind in thought, as I have been so often lately. "A starvation diet." I gesture with the hand I was biting lightly. I stop for a minute and lean back on my hands. I feel so light headed I have to keep blinking slowly to concentrate fully. Im so tiered... I sigh. "Now Im having fun with all of you..." You most of all Sho... I close my eyes as the pain sinks into my heart sharply. "...But it's not real." I say forcing myself to my feet and heading to hold onto the metal bars in front of me.

Im surprised, that for once, you're quite with your head tilted slightly to the side. You're listening to me... Really listening... You haven't answered back with one of your sharp remarks yet, or tried to interrupt me. I don't know whether to be worried or grateful. I steady myself with the bars. "You're all grown up." In more ways than one, and it hurts that I'm too weak to act on my feelings... I'm tierd of tip-toeing around you in the fear that one day, I'll say something like 'I love you' and scare you away... I can't look at you, and I know, you can't look at me. As usual. We tried very hard to avoid deep conversations like this while you were growing up. But now, you're old enough to face facts, and I can't pretend that I don't love you and that I won't miss you, any longer.

"I'll be left behind." I say, almost brokenly. "Sho..." I pause letting it sink into your head... and mine. "One day, you'll die. But I'll Keep living." I can hear your breathing elevate slightly. I look up into the lamp above my head before snapping at you. "Do you think that's fun?" I look right at you, rattling the bars out of anger, the fatigue I felt moments ago seemingly vanishing as I study you with wide alert eyes. You're not looking at me... So I study you. You don't seem fazed by my outburst, but what captures my attention immediately, is the single tear running down the side of your beautiful face. My heart breaks in that instant. I never meant to make you cry... But they say the truth always hurts. Love hurts... Reality sucks...

I watch you shake your head slightly, silently. I hate myself now more than I did before, I really do. I take a breath and close my eyes. If you only knew how much you really mean to me... How much I love you... and care for you... Things could be so much more simpler... The only reason why I live is for you Sho... the only reason I eat... breath... go out and not throw myself into the path of sunlight and die... is for you... After a few seconds I push away from the bars and go back into the other room to stand in front of you. You don't look at me as I approach, nor as I slowly, lovingly, reach out a gentle hand to wipe away the tear with my thumb, resting my fingers against your cheek while I do. "You cry baby..." I say, not chastizingly, but affectionately. You've never cried over nothing, so I know what I said hurt. Maybe I mean something to you after all...?

You swallow and blink, not pulling away, but not leaning into my hand either. I study your face intently, before reaching for your shoulder, with the hand I had on your face. No further encouragement is needed, as you automatically lean your head on my chest and begin to cry softly and silently. I gently stroke your hair with my other hand, and lean down placing a single soft kiss on your bleached blonde locks. I can't help but whisper fondly, "Just like when you were a kid." I loved those times with you, where I could hold you freely and comfort you when you had problems or were scared. In a way I miss them, although I wouldn't wish to go back. I love my time with you now, just as equally. I stroke your soft hair some more holding you close, before gently taking your shoulders and pushing you back upright. "So..." I say in a single hushed breath. You lean back, head against the wall, blinking back the remaining tears, yet still you avoid looking at me. In a way it hurts, but I understand. "Go have a good time. They'll be worried." I change the subject to one which is just as painful for me. "Ah" is all you say.

Sho:

As soon as I said those words to you, I knew how you would react... I couldnt stop myself - I was worried... Things between me and you seem a little more strained than usual recently... All I can think about is you and your well being... I know it's stupid. You're a vampire after all. You can't be killed by normal things that would kill me... the only think I know of to kill Vampires is the sun... Yet.. hearing the words from you directly now... the harshness of our reality, still hurts. When you said 'Should I drink yours?' I almost said yes – Make me like you, so I can be with you forever... but I didn't... Of course not.. Firstly you would most likely rage at me more about how I wasnt listening to you, and then... What would you think if you knew just how much I cared... I mean- really cared... You would either blow up about me asking you to turn me, and or leave me for confessing my feelings.

Anyway... It was a nice feeling, resting my head against your chest. One I've always enjoyed while growing up... So soothing... I always enjoyed the close contact of our bodies... and I used to wonder if you ever noticed when I huged you too long, or when I would just make up an excuse to touch you... or get you to hold me... I never had as many nightmares as I led you to believe Kei... I just wanted you to hold me... even now... Yet still... I couldn't look at you as you gently pushed me back against the wall. I could still feel your lingering touches on my face and head, light tingles, even though your hand was on my sholder again. "Go have a good time. They'll be worried." you said with a hint of sadness. I picked up on it, but I didnt question it. We've had enough arguments for the day, dont you think?

"Ah" I reply quietly. You begin backing away from me, and I stand up. "Kei..." I start and you turn weary eyes on me. For the first time in ages I look you in the eyes. I can see the emotions in them. I know you're tiered since you're not hiding them as well as you usually do. I feel my heart quicken. I can see the sadness, the loneliness, the pain... and love. You've always been my protector... friend and family Kei... But sometimes, I want more. I want to do more. I want to protect you... be your friend... your family... and anything else you would let me be. But you see... I dont know exactly where I stand... we never talk about it - we just... exist together... Mutual understanding... I would say we were friends if asked. I'd even say family. How do you feel about it?

I take a small breath and reach out, pulling your smaller thin frame against mine. I wrap my arms around your waist, resting my head against your shoulder. I remember looking up at you when I was kneehigh to a grasshopper... I remember you carrying me occasionally... and when we hugged, I would hide my face in your chest...I lcose my eyes almost painfully. But I dont remember when thoes days faded away. At first you tense. We have not hugged for so long. And truthfully, I miss it dearly. You relax and wrap your own arms around my shoulders, resting your head more comfortably against them. "Sho..." you whisper, and your warm breath caresses the side of my face. "I care..." Is all that I allow myself to say. I feel you pull away slightly to look at me, so I open my eyes to look back. This time, I hide nothing as I look into your eyes. I hope my eyes tell you how much I care, for I dont have the courage to tell you just yet... You take a moment to look deep into my eyes, soon he finding whatever it is you were looking for because you slowly smile one of thoes rare smiles that I know is saved only for me. "I know..." you say simply. And thats all I need to hear at this moment.

I can't help but smile warmly, another tear running down my cheek. I feel childish whenever I cry in front of you Kei - but I know its ok... even when you make comments about me being a crybaby, or something along thoes lines. I feel so happy and overwhelmed with thoughts and feelings, more so when you kiss a tear away with warms lips. "It's ok Sho..." I feel at shocked, but strangely at ease. I know you means it when you say words like that... but what does the kiss mean. I'll take a chance. I smile, mustering up the courage to do something I've wanted to do for so long. I kiss you. Well, more of a peck on the lips, but it's a start. My heart is pounding furiously in my chest, and I know I must be blushing because I feel hot. You smile your charming crooked little smile, eyes studying me intently. I smile too, although my heart feels like it's escaping from my chest out of my throat. "You better go..." you say reluctantly. For a minute I forget what you're referring to. "Oh..." I say in realization. We slowly let go of each other, and you watch me as I gather my things to leave. As I stand by the door ready, I see you smile a knowing smile. "What?" I ask. "It's going to rain later." "So I'll see you there?" "Of course." I smile at him, like an excited little child I presume, before heading out. I can hear his soft laughter through the door.

Tbc.

AN: Well that's the end of this chappie! I hope you liked - please review! Flame if you must - but be gentle!

I have written up to part 5 actually, but I have to keep re-writing them so it may take a few days or a week or 2 for things to appear!

Anyway - see you all in the next chapter!