Title: Rainy night, love in sight
Warning: Some hurting, some kissing, some confessing, the usual...
Summary: Kara is someone I created she's a japanese girl and she loves our little Ren. Kara has a crush on Ren but she's afraid to show it because she was raised to be well... a sort of soldier who won't show any emotion like Ren so she doesn't knows if Ren loves her back or not.
Disclaimer: If I was the master of Shaman King Kara and Ling Su would excist and Ren would be her lover so... Like you figured out by now. I ONLY OWN KARA AND LING SU! DON'T SUE ME! ((Runs away sobbing.))
Wo ai ni-I love you (Chinese)
Aishiteru- I love you (Japanese)
:Ey sing song:
(Authoress talking)
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I stared at the stars through the window with a sad expression on my face. Ren would never love me... I was a soldier... the same as he was, his uncle made us that way, that stupid bastard that almost killed him... and me.
'Oh Ren... I protected you the best I could when he send Pailong to you... and yet... I failed. I am so sorry...' I thought and sobbed soft remembering the horrible day.
&(Flashback)&
I stared at Pailong in utter confusion. 'I thought... he was one of the good guys together with Jun!' I thought and grabbed my swords ready to fight. I could feel Ren staring at me. 'I will protect you Ren-sama.' I whispered soft and looked at Ren who frowned slightly.
I focussed my eyes back on Pailong and attacked. That fight was the hardest I ever had, and even though blood was beginning to stream down I didn't want to give up, even though Ling Su was begging me to stop I didn't, until my Furyoku was gone and I ordered Ling Su to go away.
'But... miss Kara.' Ling su whispered. 'Now!' I hissed and stood up once again to face Pailong. 'Kara stop.' Ren said soft. The time I was fighting Pailong I asked him to stand back and don't interfere. I thought I would be enough to stop Pailong but... I wasn't.
I kept attacking until finally I broke down... all my energy was gone there was nothing left in me to fight anymore. And when Pailong gave me the last hit I fell down the ground tears streaming out of my eyes, everything wen't black... 'I failed...'
&(End flashback)&
I gritted my teeth and wanted to scream out loud but I hold in. I didn't want to wake Ren and the others who called themselfs 'friends', Yoh, HoroHoro, Pirika, Anna, Manta and all the others.
'I don't need friends.. I am a soldier.' I thought and gave a deep sigh before standing up. I couldn't stand staying here, I had to go outside. Even though it was raining I didn't felt the cold, didn't felt the rain, and even if I did I found it comforting cause the rain would cover up my tears...
I gave a deep sigh and walked around till I eventually landed at a little pool. I didn't want to see myself but I still looked in the pool to see a little girl with orange eyes and long black hair. I looked away growling and picked up a few stones throwing them into the pool. 'I don't want to see myself! I don't!' I said loud and gave another sob.
I hated crying... I hated being weak. But most of all.. I hated myself... I shut my eyes tight and dropped to the ground putting my hands against my face. When I was young everything made sense to me, but now I am getting older...
It seems so much complicater. 'Ren... Renny... Why must I always hide who I am? Why can't I show everyone who I am? Why am I so afraid to show myself...' I thought as more tears fell down and more sobs came.
:Between the sky and the Earth little me lingers
If I awake, tomorrow, as well, when morning visits, I'll have been praying alone.:
I wasn't worth anything and I know it but still... I had to be worth something right? I mean... everybody's worth something so... maybe... me too? I shook my head and stood up grabbing my swords. I closed my eyes and lowered my head.
'I don't want to keep on fighting my feelings... my emotions...' I thought and opened them looking at the tree. A willow. Another sob catched my throath and I started to attack the tree, splinters came in my skin but I didn't feel them. No I ignored them. I welcomed the pain.
:For whose sake it is... I don't know now. That's right, I met you.:
'I hate myself! I HATE MYSELF!' I cried out in thoughts and kept attacking and attacking. I don't fear death... nor do I fear pain... But I do fear emotions that I cannot control. These emotions, my emotions the emotions that were destinated to burst out so now and then.
But what if their would be a time that someone would be with me? They would think I'm weak. More like insane...
:I've come to endure the tears. Is it okay to spill the tears now?
Hey, assuming something has happened... Hey, without changing the way you are,
Can you stay smiling for me:
I dropped my swords and looked at the tree I just tortured. My head lowered and I shivered slightly. I would never get rid of these feelings no matter how hard I would try. I was bound to them as they were bound to me. I was doomed...
And there was no-one to catch me when I would fall. Their was no-one to comfort me when I wanted to give up. No-one, and then... I remind you Ren. Cause I know... You feel the same as me.
:Twinkling stars, even the moonlight, because there's night, they're shining
The times when it seems I can't sleep alone, you showed me your sleeping face.:
'I want your arms around me Ren, I want you to whisper sweet words, words that would never let me go. I want you at my side and yet... I know I am just making a fool out of myself. No-one could love me and yet... When I see your face Ren.
I know you can love me somehow. If I just find the strenght to tell you that one word. (She's japanese so she means I love you in japanese and that's one word.) But.. I am afraid to tell you...'
:As if there are no dreams that can awaken, now, I prayed strongly.:
All of a sudden two arms embraced me, I stiffened when I heard his voice. 'Kara... why are you here in the rain? And why are you destroying that damned tree.' he whispered and I turned around looking in his cat-like eyes.
The eyes I came to adore so much. And then, I just cried. I didn't cared that he were with me and saw everything, I just cried. He looked at me in surprise and gently embraced me against him kissing me softly.
:I've come to endure the tears. Is it okay to spill the tears now?
Hey, assuming something has happened... Hey, without changing the way you are,
Can you still smile for me:
I looked at him in shock, but when the shock faded I kissed back closing my eyes. This was what I wanted... But did it meaned he loved me or not? Oh Ren... Aishiteru. How many times had I dreamed of this?
And now it was coming true. Ren pulled back and looked in my orange eyes. He smiled gently and brushed away my tears with his thumbs. 'Kara... Wo ai ni.' he whispered in my ear as my heart jumped up.
:I've come to endure the tears. Is it okay to spill the tears now?
Hey, assuming something has happened.. Hey, without changing the way you are,
Can you stay smiling for me:
I smiled and embraced him too we stood there for several of seconds and finally I managed to say it. 'Ren... Aishiteru.' I whispered soft on his chest, I could feel him smile and tears were flowing out my eyes again.
'Always through eternity Ren, always.' I whispered not knwoing that twinty feet away from us, Bason and Ling Su smiled at eachother.
'I told you, that it would work Bason.' Ling Su said soft and smiled at the sight of me and Ren, when I was happy she was too.
'Kara, I love you and I will always will never forget that my sweet adorable Kara.' Ren whispered in my hair and I kissed him again. 'Ren I love you with all my heart.' above us the darkness was fading away. Sunrise was coming but we didn't notice, we were lying in eachother's arms on the wet grass comforting eachother.
:A morning of light: as the scent of hope overflows
It tints your profile
Without letting go of these tightly grasped fingertips
Let's open the door to the furture together
The sound of the bell of happiness echoes in the sky
Flow-down angels sing a song
Ah, this love will last forever
I want to swear to you the things I believe in
There were discouraging nights, too, but
Countless times I was saved by your smiling face
Something even more precious than words
Is understood deep in our hearts
Times when raging sadness preys on us
We'll be fine if we we're together: We'll overcome it
Ah, we'll walk this path forever
Nothing will ever stand in our way again
It continues to the future...:
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Me: Yeah sorry if it was crappy. I was in a sad mood and I just had to write it down... sigh. I hope you enjoyed it and R&R please, I love it! And pweezze pweezzzzze dwon't fwame mwe!
Kurayami: ((mutters something you can't hear))
Me: What's that Kurayami?
Kurayami: Nothing at all...
Darius: ((Frowns and shakes his head)) Anyway R&R Ciao! ((Flies off))