Webgott two-part drabble series.
Warnings: Cursing, allusions to sex between to MEN!!
Series title: You Knew
Part I of "You Knew": Clean
You stand on the edge of something, as though afraid to move forward, but unable to go back. God you are so fucking cliché. Ever the literate fool with a head fill of poetic sounding prose running through his fucking head.
You exhale and move forward, towards the caravan of trucks.
You can feel it on your skin, smell it on yourself.
As soon as you looked at the faces of these men you once knew so well. Men who could cough in the dark and you would know by the sound which man it had been. But now you knew.
You knew the minute your eyes fell on the first down turned dirty face. You knew.
You knew you were too clean. Too fucking clean.
You looked so untouched, unchanged, unmarked by the ravages of this war to be let back in among them as their brother again. As his lover again.
The minute those now so vacant eyes fell on you, you knew. You knew you were too fucking clean to them.
But in that minute you knew.
You knew you would never feel clean again.