Chapter 1: Mad Libs
"I'm not sure what this is about either," Phantom Girl told Superman as the two of them entered the meeting room. Bouncing Boy, Triplicate Girl and Brainiac 5 glanced at them.
"So, what is going on?" Superman asked.
"Teambuilding exercise," Brainy replied.
"Yeah. Things have been slow around here, so I decided we should do something as a team," Bouncing Boy explained.
Within the next few minutes, the room had filled up and Bouncing Boy pulled out… a pad of paper. And a pen.
"So what are we doing?" Timberwolf demanded.
"Mad libs!" Bouncing Boy cried excitedly. This exclamation was met with mainly blank stares, though Superman was grinning.
"I think I'm speaking for most of us when I ask… what is that?" Phantom Girl finally said.
"It's really hilarious," Superman said quickly.
"Yeah," Bouncing Boy agreed. "Basically what you do is fill in the blanks with the most weird adjectives, nouns, and other parts of speech that we all use every day. Then, we read the little story. It can be about the squishy caterpillar who bakes ice cream in the stretchy ocean, for all we know. It's hil-a-ri-ous!"
"Let's start then!" Triplicate Girl urged.
"Okay, so this one is called… My Dream Girl," Bouncing Boy said, emphasizing 'dream'. "I need an Adjective."
"Floppy!" Superman suggested.
"Slimy!" Triplicate girl tried.
"Scintillating," Brainiac 5 suggested.
"What does…that word…mean?" Lightning Lad asked after a moment
"Scintillating: dazzlingly impressive; possessing or displaying a dazzlingly impressive liveliness, cleverness, or wit," Brainy answered.
"Great, I like it," Bouncing Boy said. Then, glancing up, he asked, "How do you spell that?"
Brainy sighed. "S-C-I-N-T-I-double L-A-T-I-N-G."
"Scin-till-a-ting," Bouncy murmured, scribbling down the adjective. "Okay, color."
"Brown," Timberwolf droned.
"Orange!" Triplicate Girl suggested.
"Chartreuse or Mauve are some obscure colors," Phantom Girl suggested.
"Yeah! How to you spell chartreuse?" Bouncing Boy asked, pen poised.
"Um… I don't know," Phantom Girl admitted.
"C-H-A-R-T-R-E-U-S-E," Brainy said, shaking his head, "Will I need to spell every word?"
"No, just the long ones," Bouncy replied. "Oh, what color is chartreuse anyway?"
"It's a garish yellow-green color," Phantom Girl said.
"That's great," Bouncing Boy sniggered. "Okay, plural noun!"
"Staplers," Lightning Lad suggested.
"Week-old Lasagnas!" Bouncing Boy shouted, writing it down. "Now, another adjective."
"Fluffy," Saturn Girl suggested.
Bouncy grinned. "That's perfect!" he said, quickly writing it down. "Okay, type of liquid."
"Water," Timberwolf said.
"Air," Brainy suggested.
"What?!" Bouncing Boy glanced at him, wondering if he'd heard the Coluan right.
"Air is a liquid," Brainy said firmly.
"That'll work, then," Bouncing Boy said, writing it in. "All right, another Adjective."
"Hyper," Phantom Girl suggested.
"Right-o," Bouncing Boy said, writing it down. "Okay, plural noun."
"Caterpillars," Lightning Lad suggested.
Bouncing Boy snickered. "That was random!" he exclaimed, scribbling down 'caterpillars'. "Okay, another adjective."
"Preternatural," Brainy suggested.
"Again, what does that mean?" Lightning Lad asked.
"Preternatural means something that goes beyond nature; something that exceeds what is normal in nature," Brainy explained.
"Preternatural is just peter with an R after the P, and then the word natural, right?" Bouncing Boy clarified, quickly writing the word.
Brainy nodded. "Correct," he said.
"Okay, noun," Bouncing Boy called.
"Hamster," Superman suggested.
Bouncing Boy let loose with a guffaw, then covered his mouth and wrote 'hamster.' "Person in room," he said, glancing around.
"Brainy," Lightning Lad said.
"Don't worry, I know how to spell that," Bouncing Boy told the Coluan, writing down 'Brainiac 5.' "Exclamation," he said, glancing up.
"Boo!" Phantom Girl cried,
"Ouch!" Triplicate Girl said.
"RAWR!" Timberwolf said suddenly.
"Rawr?" Phantom Girl asked.
"No, not 'rawr', RAWR!" Timberwolf clarified.
"How do you spell that?" Bouncing Boy teased.
"With all caps," Timberwolf replied.
"Okey-dokey," Bouncing Boy said, writing 'RAWR!'. "Now, adjective."
"Slimy!" Phantom Girl cheered.
"Repulsive," Brainy suggested.
"Deciduous," Triplicate Girl said.
"Um…" Bouncing Boy frowned, writing 'Deciduous.' "I think I spelled that right," he commented. "Okay, another Adjective."
"Preppy," Phantom Girl suggested.
"I need another adjective," Bouncing Boy said, putting 'preppy' down.
"Lackluster," Brainy said.
"Nice," Bouncy said, writing it. "Okay, another adjective!"
"Masculine!" Lightning Lad suggested.
Bouncing Boy started laughing, "Great!" he said, writing it down. "A noun!"
"Table," Superman suggested.
"Perfect!" Bouncing Boy said. "Plural noun."
"Hairs," Triplicate Girl suggested.
Bouncing Boy was struggling mightily to keep from laughing. "Great!" he said in a choked voice, writing down 'hairs'. "Okay, Adjective!"
"Dippy," Tripicate Girl said.
"Right," Bouncing Boy said, writing it down. "Aaand, Female Person in room."
"Tinya Wazzo," Timberwolf said, glancing at Phantom Girl.
Bouncy wrote it down and passed the pad to Brainy. "You read it," he said, "I'm going to die of laughter over here."
Brainy glanced at him, apparently unconvinced that he was going to die from laughing, shrugged and read the completed mad libs aloud.
"The girl of my dreams has scintillating chartreuse hair scented like week-old lasagnas." Brainy began, but had to stop as everyone began laughing.
"Her eyes are like two fluffy pools of air. And her lips remind me of hyper caterpillars. Her skin is smooth and lovely as a preternatural hamster, and she has a figure like… Brainiac 5," here the laughter became so loud he had to wait another moment to continue.
"When she enters a room, people always stare at her and say 'RAWR! What a deciduous woman!' Her sense of humor is always preppy, and people marvel at her lackluster vocabulary. In my dreams I see her wearing a masculine dress--" Here Brainy was forced to pause for the third time. "A masculine dress, and a diamond table in her hair. I would gladly give up all my hairs for one evening with this dippy female. Her name is Tinya Wazzo."
"Phantom girl, RAWR! Those lips remind me of hyper caterpillars!" Lightning Lad teased.
"I suppose you never realized you had a figure like Brainy, did you?" Saturn Girl laughed.
"I'd gladly give up all my hairs for one evening with the dippy female," Timberwolf snorted.
Phantom Girl looked up and down Timberwolf and shook her head. "Aww, puppy, that would be a sacrifice, wouldn't it?"
Brainy was shaking his head. "What would constitute a masculine dress?" he finally demanded. "A toga?"
Needless to say, the laughter went on for quite awhile. Here are two other Mad Libs they filled out before parting for the night:
ADVICE TO PROSPECTIVE PARENTS:
Congratulations to all of you grevious mothers and poofy fathers. You are about to give birth to an astrodome. The arrival of your bucket will cause many twisted changes in your life. You'll probably have to give the little chainsaw its bottle of disintegrated milk and change his or her books. Later, when he or she is six thousand years old and able to walk you'll hear the patter of little bananas around the house. And in no time, your child will be talking scientifically and calling you his or her "Muffin" and saying things like "RAWR!" right to your face. It's no wonder they are called little bundles of COMPUTO.
BEAUTY ADVICE:
If your skin is green or lumpy, you can cure this condition with the following regimen. Every morning, before washing your armpit, massage it gently with a monkey that has been soaked overnight in a toilet full of warm lubricant. Then mix together some popcorn and some moon dust until the mixture becomes slimy. Pat this onto your ugly face for five minutes. Then remove using a chisel and wash your face with gooey water. Do not omit this broken step, or your skin will become bumpy. Do this animatedly every day, and you will soon be as dramatic as Garth.
A/N: So here's my entry to the RAWR contest, and I think I'll make this a multiple-chapter fic... if anyone has ideas for teambuilding activities, let me know. I think next one is going to be two truths and a lie...