A.N: hi folks! me again and I come baring gifts in the form of a new multi-chaptered story. but wait, guess what... every chapter is written. I'm not even kidding - this has NEVER happened before. i've always had something to tweak in it, but in this, there's nothing other than minor things i've missed. i am excited, this is different haha. Now, I don't know about you guys, but the episode they did in season 9 where Lindsay travelled back to Montana really, really touched me and it's stayed with me ever since I watched it. I think partially because it was literally everything I've always wanted for her and Lindsay's house was EXACTLY how I pictured it to be. (Seriously, I had to pause the episode on my laptop and stared with tears in my eyes because it was like they had literally taken the image from my head... that was probably an overshare but anyway). I have been working on this story for a few months now. And actually, I believe I was working on this story when I found out that it wasn't coming back in the fall. So this story has been hard, but therapeutic to write as well. Therefore it means a lot to me. I don't really know why that is.. but it does. So I really hope you guys like it.

"But you don't worry about me, baby. You just go and do what you've gotta do. I'll still be here for you. With arms open wide, I'll be your umbrella when you just can't stand the rain; there by your side, I wanna be your shelter when you just can't stand the rain."

-Can't Stand the Rain, Lady Antebellum.

With the sound of a loud, frustrated sigh entering the break room, Danny looked up with amusement on his face. "Tough day, dear?"

"The worst; your wife has been a whirlwind all day, Danno."

"What else is new, Flack, surely you know her well enough by now to know that she doesn't sit still for two minutes." Danny smirked. "At least I know where Lucy gets it from; I know she don't get it from me. I'm quite happy sitting at a game for two hours and not moving."

"Yeah yeah. That's real nice, Messer but when I said whirlwind I meant an angry hurricane."

"Really?" Danny paused as he dropped his sandwich onto the wrapper on the table. "How so?"

"I don't know dude, she got to the scene this morning and she was grumpy as all hell. I ended up not talkin' to her in the end. There's no reasoning with her today. Did you piss her off?"

"Not that I know of," Danny pursed his lips together. "Even when I do, she's not like this. Something's up."

"Well I don't know what's wrong with her, Danno, but she's mad about something. You better figure out what you did quick before she causes havoc."

"Yeah, yeah, I will." Danny agreed absent-mindedly. She was either angry… or upset. He'd get to the bottom of it eventually.

That was the thing about their job; he could go an entire day in the same building and not cross paths with his wife once. Then other days, they'd spend the entire day together. It was so unpredictable. She had left before he'd even woken up this morning and it had fallen on his fatherly duties to wash, dress and feed Lucy before taking her to school. He'd actually not even spoke to Lindsay other than a text at around nine thirty, saying he missed her. She'd replied with a curt I miss you too but nothing else. He'd thought at the time that she was probably just busy at the scene and needed to get back to it quickly, but had wanted to acknowledge his text. But now with Flack saying what he had, Danny figured there was something simmering with her.

He'd just have to wait and see.

"Danny!" In response to his name being called, Danny looked up from his evidence and smiled in the direction of his boss.

"Hey Mac, what's up?"

Mac quietly collected a stool from the pile in the corner of the lab and moved to sit next to Danny. "What are you working on?"

"Glass from my scene. The windscreen of the car was smashed through. I'm trying to find directionality marks but at the minute everything I'm about to conclude gets contradicted right as I think I've figured it out so I'm just waiting for the evidence to speak to me."

Mac smiled fondly at something that was so uniquely Danny. For years Danny had talked about waiting for the evidence to talk to him and while it wasn't anything Mac would ever consider saying, the process worked for Danny and Mac couldn't fault that.

"Alright, I'm sorry I asked." Mac chuckled before sobering slightly, "Listen, I want to talk to you about something."

"Alright?" Danny said, snapping his gloves off and turning to toss them in the trash. "What's the matter?"

"Is everything okay with you and Lindsay?" Mac asked quietly. "I know it's none of my business but-"

"Everything's fine." Danny instantly reassured him. "Flack's mentioned something about her not being in the best of moods today though." Danny paused. "Why is something wrong?"

"No, no nothing's wrong." Mac assured him. "She's fine; I'm just… a little worried about her. I'm getting distinct vibes that something is bothering her. I wondered whether you knew? But clearly from the look on your face you're just as in the dark as everyone else."

"Yeah," Danny sighed rubbing the back of his neck. "I haven't actually seen her today yet. And we've only text each other once so-"

Mac frowned. "If I could give you an hour or two for lunch I would."

"No I know that, Mac. It's just one of those things that are out of our control. I honestly don't know what's wrong with her. Sometimes she just goes quiet. You know, when it's one of her friends' birthdays, or the day when it happened… but that's not for another couple months yet."

"Well I'm going to keep my eye on her," Mac said softly. "Not because I don't trust her… just because I'm worried about her."

"No yeah, that's okay." Danny nodded. "I appreciate it, considerin' I can't watch out for her myself. I mean I'm not saying she's not capable of looking out for herself. I trust her completely and hope you do too… it's just. Ugh, I don't know Mac."

"You care about her and love her. Just like I do. We want to protect her, sometimes from herself and her stubbornness."

"Exactly." Danny nodded. "I think sometimes you know her just as well as I do."

"No-one could know her and love her as much as you do, Danny. Us mere mortals can only try."

"You're hilarious." Danny smirked as he reached for another pair of gloves. "I'm sure whatever it is will be okay in the end."

"It always is." Mac nodded as he clapped Danny affectionately on the back.

Stretching and sighing heavily, Danny motioned down the hallway of their apartment building. After a long and heavy shift, he was nothing but pleased and relieved to be on the homestretch. Lindsay had left work hours before he had and he only hoped she was still awake. He'd seen her walking down the hallway about six hours ago and he could tell just from the way she was carrying herself that there was something massively troubling her; he just couldn't figure out what it was. He knew he'd done nothing to piss her off. She could be feeling sick and that always put her out of sorts. She could be pregnant; they were after all trying again… but she wouldn't be angry and upset about that, would she? His eyes widened as he paused in the hallway. God, she wouldn't, would she? He hoped that wasn't the case because even though she'd initiated the conversation and they'd only just started trying, it didn't mean she hadn't changed her mind… he took a deep breath as he poised the key above the lock. He had to approach this carefully. He definitely didn't want to go in there guns blazing. That'd piss her off even more. Plus, he didn't really know what was wrong. And the last thing he wanted was for her to find out that both Mac and Flack had told him she was a walking hurricane, clearly upset and angry about something.

He pushed the door open and breathed a sigh of relief when he heard quiet music playing from the living room. That was a good sign that she hadn't gone to bed; falling asleep on the couch was a different story though.

"Hey Linds," He called quietly as he kicked off his shoes. He quickly made his way to the living room. "How was your day?"

She shrugged quietly, glancing up from the book she was holding. "Okay." She replied in a quiet, sad voice. "Yours?"

"Crappy." He sighed heavily. "I missed you all day."

"I missed you too." She said, closing the book. She had her legs tucked underneath her and she had his grey t-shirt on; one that she so often slept in when she was seeking safety and comfort.

"But everything's okay other than that?"

"Danny, I know Flack and Mac talked to you." She said softly. "I'm not stupid. I'm not mad either."

"I – I didn't say you were."

"I know you didn't. You don't need to say anything. I can see it in your eyes though."

"Well, they just were worried. They said you weren't yourself."

"I'm fine." She insisted. "Your dinner's in the fridge," she said softly. "I figured you'd be hungry. Heat it up for like three minutes in the microwave and it should be okay. You might need to check it though."

"Thanks baby." He said, moving across the room to drop a kiss to her forehead. "Listen, I know you might not wanna talk about it, but I'm all ears if you do."

"I know." She smiled up at him. It was a smile he could tell was painful; she definitely didn't feel like smiling and a long time ago he would have fallen for that smile. It was a smile she had perfected over the years… now however – it took a lot more to convince him that she was in fact –fine.

Despite his disbelief in her insistence, he made his way into the kitchen and reached for a glass before moving to the fridge and grabbing his dinner that was covered in cling film. He grabbed the milk while he was at it and poured himself a glass as he made his way over to the microwave. As Lindsay had instructed him, he placed the plate in the microwave and programmed it for three minutes. As the microwave turned his dinner, heating it up, he tidied the few things on the counter-top that had accumulated there since Lindsay had gotten home. He flicked through the mail on the counter that he hadn't had chance to look at this morning and his eyebrows arched at the sight of one letter in-particular.

"Huh," he mused to himself as he read the address. The address was correct, but Lindsay's name wasn't. Monroe? She'd been a Messer for five years now. He looked a little more closely at the envelope and saw the post-mark from Montana. That made sense, he thought to himself. There'd be people back in Montana that had no idea she wasn't using Monroe anymore.

Curious to what was inside; he pulled the letter out from the already opened envelope and unfolded it, beginning to read the letter.

The microwave dinged in the background but his attention was only focused on the words on the paper looking up at him; the same words that had stared up at Lindsay earlier this morning.

He felt his heart beating rapidly in his chest. He felt his hands becoming sweaty and he felt sick. Memories that both he and Lindsay had shoved to the back of their mind came flooding to the fore-front; no escaping them. He could still see the way Lindsay had looked so terrified as he walked into the courtroom. He could still remember the image she painted as she went through her testimony on the stand. He could remember holding her as she cried in his rental car after they'd heard the verdict. He'd watched years of pain and suffering being released; joining them together as she let him into something that had been so desperately private.

And now, here they were again – only this time it was different.

Forgetting about his dinner and milk, he went back to the fridge and reached for the unopened bottle of Lindsay's favourite wine. They weren't big drinkers – anymore at least – but he thought that this called for something a little stronger than milk, water or tea.

"Baby," he sighed, making his way back into the living room with the two wine glasses, the bottle of wine, a corkscrew and the letter in his arms. "Why didn't you tell me?" he attempted to place the wine glasses and wine bottle on the table carefully but the corkscrew clattered onto the top, and he looked to Lindsay with desperate eyes filled with pleads of 'help!' She smiled softly at him and took the two wine glasses and placed them upturned on the table. He then proceeded to unscrew the cork, quietly waiting for a reply.

"I needed to process it by myself," she shrugged as he poured her a hearty glass of wine. "I didn't want to tell you at work."

"I know but baby, we could have talked about it."

"We didn't have the time today," she reminded him. "We didn't even get to see each other. I haven't talked to you all day and I definitely didn't want this to be the first conversation we had."

"I know but… I hate that you've been thinkin' about this all day."

She shrugged, cradling the wine glass between her hands. "I know."

"What are we gonna do?" he asked softly, sitting next to her on the couch, taking one of her hands as she placed the wine glass on her thigh, holding it with one hand.

"I'm still trying to figure that out." She replied quietly.

"I thought for sure we'd have to go through another ten appeals." He said with a sigh. "Trudging it all up again; hearing the shit he spewed about you identifying the wrong person."

"So did I."

"How do you feel about it?"

She shrugged. "I don't really know to be honest," she said as she laid her head on his shoulder. "It's what I've wanted and waited for, but now that it's here, it doesn't seem right."

"Why?"

"Because!" she implored with emotion in her tone. "Why does he get the easy way out?" he could tell she was looking for an answer. An answer she'd so desperately wanted but never received.

"I don't know sweetheart." He sighed as he pressed a kiss to her temple as she sipped her wine. "I don't know why."

"I feel like I want him to suffer in prison for the rest of his life. He stole four lives that day. He doesn't deserve anything less than rotting in prison."

"But to have him gone-"

"That makes us just as bad as he is." Lindsay snapped. "An eye for an eye makes the world go blind, Danny."

"But Linds, baby… he did a bad thing."

"I know Danny. I know he did, believe me. I was there. I saw everything that he did and I'll never forget what he did to them. He took the three most precious things from me, from their families."

"And he needs to pay for what he did, baby." Danny said softly. "When he was sentenced, we knew this would come. It's what the judge ordered and I completely agree with it. He doesn't deserve to breathe the same air you do. He doesn't deserve to be here. Not after what he did. I know you don't believe in it, but baby… the pain he's put you through – if they put me in a room with him for five minutes, he'd feel pain. Trust me. He'd feel pain. He wouldn't even live to tell the tale."

"I don't doubt that." She said softly. "I just… I don't know Danny. I don't want him to be able to take the easy way out."

"He hasn't baby. Believe me. He's had six long years to think about what he did."

Lindsay fell silent, taking automatic sips of her wine every few minutes. Danny felt the need to leave her be for the time being. It was a lot for her to process and while he knew her stance, he couldn't help his own opinions surfacing. With their line of work, they came into these types of situations now and again. There was always the debate of should they, shouldn't they? How bad did a crime have to be in order to sentence someone to death? Killing four girls in cold blood for no motive whatsoever other than a few dollars in the cash register made Danny think this qualified. Lindsay had a different stance though. She'd watched her friends being murdered. She'd listened to their last cries. It was something that literally made Danny feel sick to his stomach. He wanted to do nothing but remove those memories from her brain. He wanted to relieve her of the pain she felt. He wanted to save her from everything she'd ever had to go through as a result of it. He knew she wanted nothing but him to be sorry for what he did. She'd listened to an insistence from himself for years that it wasn't him – they'd got the wrong person – he'd never been to Montana in his life. When all Lindsay wanted was for him to say sorry; for him to admit that what he had done was wrong – so wrong. But she'd never gotten it. And that's why Danny suspected she was struggling with it so much. If he was sentenced to death then that would inevitably mean she would never get that from him. Daniel Katums would never be sorry for what he did. And that scared Danny to no end because he didn't know what that would do to his beautiful, undeserving wife.

"Lindsay, listen to me." He whispered to her temple. "I'll support you whatever, you know that, but I really think you should think carefully about this. You're only going to get one chance here. They've offered you the chance to speak with him before. This could be your chance to get the answers to the questions you have. This could be your chance for him to say what you need to hear. I know it won't mean anything. It won't bring them back, but it might help you."

"I know," she said quietly.

"So what do ya wanna do?" he asked her.

"I want to go." She said with a pause. She sipped her wine and moved away from his shoulder, which made him turn to look at her. Her expression unnerved him and he could sense what was coming next. "There's something I need to tell you though," she said, making a heavy weight, marked: dread settle in his stomach.

"Okay…"

"I need to do this alone."

And there it was. He'd expected it. Anticipated it. It just didn't make it any easier. The look on his face was automatic and no matter how hard he tried to hide it, it was no use; he was hurt.

"It's not you." She instantly blurted out before closing her eyes and sighing heavily. Silence fell between them as she regained her composure. "I didn't mean that." She said. "What I meant was it's nothing against you and the support you never fail to give me, honey, it's just that I need and want to do this by myself. In order to finish this part of my life, I need to go into it how I started it… alone."

"But you're not alone!" he implored. "I'm here. I've been here all along. Please don't forget that, Linds. I went to the trial with you. I was there. I can go and hold your hand, help you through it. Please don't do this to yourself. Don't make yourself suffer when I can be there for you to lean on."

"What would we do with Lucy though, Danny?"

"She can stay with your Dad. He'd love to see her. Or she could stay here in New York with my Mom. We have options Linds."

"No we don't." Lindsay shook her head. "Danny, she needs to be with us. I appreciate you wanting to come baby, but this is honestly what I need. It's what I want. I want to do it alone for us. I love you but your duties here are to look after our baby, not me."

"You're my baby though." He said with unshed emotion in his eyes. He pressed a kiss to her temple and wrapped his arms around her tightly, mindful of her wine. "And believe it or not, you always will be my baby. I wanna be there to protect you, sweetheart. I don't want him to hurt you again."

"He can't hurt me anymore than he already has." Lindsay pointed out. "He took something that can never be replaced. My childhood was over. My life totally changed. He couldn't have hurt me anymore than he did that day. There's nothing else he can do now. But even so, I need to do it alone. I need to hurt and remember those feelings of pain. I need to be able to let it go, and I can only do that by facing my demons head on. I don't want to put you through all of this again. I need you to be strong for me and the way you're gonna do that is be here and look after our baby. She needs you more than I do. I'll be okay. I promise you."

"But you're just so strong all the time." Danny frowned. "Sometimes it's okay to need me."

"I need you, Danny." She said, reassuring him. "Trust me, I need you everyday. There's not a day that goes by where I don't thank my lucky stars that I have you. You have no idea how much you mean to me… But this here, this is honestly something I need to do alone. I've thought about it all day, and I definitely think I've made the right decision."

"There's no way I can change your mind?"

She shook her head. "If I do change my mind, you'll be the first one to know. Deal?"

"Deal." He sighed. "So long as you promise me you'll be okay."

"With you in my corner, cheering me on and ready to catch me when I fall, I'll always be okay." She smiled softly.

And there we have the first chapter. If you haven't figured it out yet, this story is set around 9x8 (I believe it is 9x8 at least...) and will go through various blanks I wish we would have been able to see during the episode. Like i said, it's completely finished so hopefully I'll be able to post all the chapters pretty quickly. Thanks for reading - as always, I'd love to know what you guys thought. :)