A/U at the end of the Season.

Assumes Ellie and Awesome didn't go through with the second wedding. Ellie is blaming everything going wrong on awesome and his uptight family, not Chuck. Chuck does have mad kung Fu skills and Casey and Sarah are still his handlers.

I own nothing.

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Day 43 of the Ellie watch. At least that is what Chuck had dubbed it. His guilt at Awesome and Ellie's wedding day nightmare had led him to stand watch over her. Not that she wanted him there. Not that she wanted anything. Well except maybe to curl into a ball and get sucked into the black hole that was her sadness. Mostly she just wanted to go back to being her normal happy self. Chuck had spent the first week trying to get her to laugh. He switched tactics on day 8 and tried getting her to cry. Day 14 and he found himself telling her to get angry. Day 23 and he was back to laughter. On day 33 he had just decided to keep quiet and make sure that when she finally did decide it was time to grieve over the loss he would be there with a shoulder to cry on. Another week and a half passed and still nothing. Ellie was walking through her life like a zombie. She hadn't cried since she had stepped out of the tub that fateful day. She woke up, went to work, did laundry, went running, cooked dinner and brushed her teeth. Everyday was the same and everyday she had to force herself to do the things she normally found such joy in. She knew she was on the verge or being clinically depressed. The doctor in her could recognize the warning signs but the woman in her didn't care. She wanted to fast forward a year to when the pain would be gone and she could go back to being happy go lucky Ellie.

A knock at the door pulled her from her monotonous reverie of wishing time away. She looked up from the pile of half folded laundry to listen. Chuck obviously answered the door but it was the voice on the other side that drew her out of her own head. People had been calling and stopping by, some even sent cards. All saying the same thing, How sorry they were and how they knew a strong women like her would get through this but this man had no real reason to express any of that. He barely knew her and certainly the few times they had chatted he had held her at a distance, and yet he knocked on her apartment door everyday checking on her. He had even brought over food a few times. Never once did he ask how she was holding up or any of the dozens of other platitudes that had grated on her nerves. Everyday it was the same. He was going to some such store and did they need anything.

"Hey Casey, where you headed today?" Chuck asked knowing the real purpose of this visit was not to check if they needed eggs but willing to play along.

"Heard the farmers market has fresh peaches. I've been thinking about pie a lot lately. Thought maybe you and your sister would like some." His face was all business but he glanced at the bedroom door half a dozen times while he talked. Chuck knew he was thought. He wasn't sure how he felt about this giant of a man being concerned about his sister. Casey wasn't the warm and fuzzy type and yet he seemed genuinely concerned about his part in Ellie's wedding nightmare. Could John Casey actual feel guilt over someone else's feelings? Chuck didn't want to think about that too much. He preferred think of Casey like a robot. Kind of like the terminator. Sent to protect him, not to kill him that would be very bad. Yeah just like Arnold in T2.

"That sounds good Casey. Thanks."

"I'll be back." Chuck blanched at that. Could Casey actually read his thoughts? That was a scary thought.

Ellie's mouth twitched slightly at the sound of his voice. It was the closest she had gotten to a smile since the day. She wasn't sure what it was about him that made the pain ease slightly but she had actually started looking forward to him stopping by each day. She knew he was checking on her but at least he wasn't in her face. She loved Chuck with all her heart but she was glad when he stopped trying to get her to open up about how she felt. She just wanted to stay in her cocoon until this blew over. If that took a year then she was going to wait. She turned back to the pile of clean laundry and picked up a shirt folding it mechanically. Just keep moving forward just keep moving forward.. She found herself repeating it over and over again in her head. It was the only thing that stopped her from curling up in a ball and never getting out of bed.

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Casey had spent an hour at the farmers market wandering from stall to stall before he settled on the peaches he had come for. He couldn't shake the image of Ellie sitting on her bed folding laundry on the tiny surveillance screen. Her sadness was overwhelming and yet she soldiered on. Sure she hadn't been her normal bubbly self but she woke up every morning and faced the day. Casey begrudgingly respected that. He didn't think he knew another woman that wouldn't be crying her eyes out and moaning about poor me. The fact that he was partly to blame for her sorrow also hadn't escaped him. John Casey was a man who put his country before even himself but he was bothered by the lingering thought that if he had done something different at the drive in or if he had trusted his partner more this whole thing could have been avoided.

Partner. Crap he hated how attached he was becoming to everyone on this dam assignment. Sitting in that plane with his men Casey had felt the old wanderlust return full force. Now that he was back protecting the intersect he felt the claustrophobia settling in. Worse than that was the slight pull he felt whenever he thought about the future and settling down. Casey had given up his piece of the American Pie in order to ensure everyone else could enjoy it. But now watching Ellie and awesome plan a life and Sarah and Chuck do the same he felt a tug from the center of his chest. Could it be possible that John Casey, stone cold killer, wanted to be domesticated? Shaking off that disturbing thought he paid for the peaches and strolled back to his car.

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As soon as Casey closed the door behind him he activated the monitors for the Bartowski apartment. Chuck was sitting on the couch watching some awful TV show and Ellie was still sitting on her bed folding laundry. Casey had been gone at least an hour. How was it possible she was still there? Looking closer he noticed she was holding a shirt in her lap smoothing her hand over the fabric. She was rocking back and forth in an effort to comfort herself but still her eyes were dry. Casey felt the tug again. He wished there was something he could do or at the very least he wished he didn't care.

Walking into the kitchen he went about getting out everything he would need for the pie. He even took the time to copy the recipe down on an index card. Ellie always asked him for the recipe every time he brought something to Sunday dinner. He had gotten into the habit of making sure he had it at the ready. Another sign he was getting soft.

Covered in flour and sticky from the peaches Casey pulled the two pies from the oven and placed them on the counter to cool. He quickly washed his hands. It was going to be a while before they were cool enough to bring next door he should really go for a run so he could enjoy his piece later ala mode guilt free.

Tossing his dirty clothes in his hamper and pulling out his jogging gear Casey was changed and heading out the door in less than 5 minutes. As he grabbed a bottle of water and hung his key around his neck. He normally would have strapped his piece to the small of his back but he had gotten a bit more lax about this as of late. Now that Chuck wasn't quite the invalid he was in the past and not to mention he never went anywhere without Sarah. They were like a couple of teenagers always holding hands. The fact that the General had allowed this bothered him. Grabbing the phone he dialed the familiar numbers to the Orange Orange.

"Walker, Casey here. I'm going to be out of communication for the next hour, going for a jog. You have eyes on?" Sarah turned to face the monitor that held the feed of Chuck's house to make sure she could see him.

"Yeah eyes on, Walker out, Enjoy the sun Casey."

Lost in his own thoughts Casey stepped out of his apartment and began stretching in the courtyard. Feeling him muscles limber up he picked a direction and began his jog. His plan was the head towards the beach and run the circuit there then loop back around the complex to his apartment. In total it was about 5 miles but the circuit made it a bit more challenging. Of course Casey could realistically complete it with a 50 pound ruck sack and full gear but that would draw a lot of unwanted questions. Casey had to work really hard not to let himself get soft on this assignment. It wasn't like the buymore was a bastion of healthy living. Quitting that job was very satisfying. One of the few good things to come out of Chuck's upgraded intersect was that he had actually begun training with Casey and Sarah and while his knowledge was there his body needed the training to allow him to execute it. In Casey's opinion Chuck would always be soft but he had to admit he had come a long way. It was unlikely he would be real competition for Casey for a while but every little bit helped. He just hoped the kid stuck with it. He had finally stopped whining about going back to his normal life.

Casey was lost in his thoughts for the first mile of his jog. As he was approaching the open stretch of beach where he would normally pick up his pace his focus was drawn to the figure on the beach in front of him. She was jogging in short shorts and a jogging bra in the same shade of soft blue. From behind Casey was entranced by the rhythmic sway of her hips and the long dark pony tail that swayed back and forth across sun kissed skin. Wanting to enjoy the view a bit longer he kept pace with her and held back. As his sneakers pounded the damp sand Casey busied his mind with wicked thoughts about those long tanned legs. He pulled his shirt off and for once was glad he wasn't carrying. People tend to get a bit nervous when they see a man running along the beach with a 9MM strapped to his back. Casey watched as she approached the outcrop of rocks that jutted out into the ocean. He was so mesmerized by her hips it took him a moment to realize she wasn't going to turn around. Her pace slowed as she began her accent of the first rocks but her footing faltered and she fell back. Hitting the hard sand with an audible thud. Casey increased his speed and was next to her before she even had time to sit up.

"fuck fuck fuck." Casey was bending over the prone form one Eleanor Bartowski, sister of the Intersect. Owner of the backside he had been ogling for the last 20 minutes. He had the slightest moment of hesitation as the full impact of what he had been thinking and who he had been thinking it about hit him. Just as quickly he was back in control.

"You kiss your mother with that mouth Ellie?" John tried to give her his easy going guy from the buymore smile but he stopped as he took in her face. She looked old and worn out and her eyes held a sadness that he hadn't seen since combat. He reached down to try and help her to her feet but she slapped his hands away and cursed some more. She was saying things that would make a sailor blush. But that wasn't what shocked John; it was how quickly she hid the sadness in favor of anger. Getting herself to her feet she stood up made only a cursory attempt to brush the sand off her, instead opting to pace back and force in front of John yelling about how she didn't need his help. He just stood these slack jawed.

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Ellie had hoped a jog would clear away some of the cobwebs in her mind. The rush of jogging used to make her giddy. Now it was all she could do to keep her feet going. The methodically pounding of her feet on the sand had managed to at least give her something to think about other than the black hole that was her chest. If she was completely honest with herself she had been having doubts about Devon for a while. What kind of woman marries a perpetual man child called Captain Awesome? Ellie had always loved taking care of people. It was one of the main reason she had become a doctor. She had been taking care of Chuck for a while by the time she met Devon and she just fell into the habit of taking care of him too. It was like she already had two children, three if you counted Morgan. But then Sarah came along and Chuck didn't need a mother anymore, he needed his sister but she was still stuck taking care of Devon and she didn't know how to stop. She wouldn't lie to herself he was a wonderful man. Kind and caring and she had truly loved him. That was part of the problem. If Devon had done something she could have worked up some righteous anger and moved on. This way she was stuck in limbo. Wondering if she had let the best thing ever to happen to her slip through her fingers because he wasn't perfect. It hurt. It hurt so much it made breathing difficult. It did awful things to her world. Ellie was sure, steady, and reliable always and if she didn't know what to do about Devon she felt herself questioning everything in her life. It was stupid how she was letting one piece of her life spill out into everything else.

As she approached the breaker she would normally turn back around but today seemed like a good day to make a change. Deciding she would cross over them and just keep going she slowed her pace and put her foot on the first rock. Almost immediately she felt the shift of her foot and she was falling backwards. As she hit the sand she looked up to see John Casey standing over her. How had he gotten there? Had she been so oblivious to her surroundings she hadn't noticed him? As he reached a hand down to help her the anger boiled over and she exploded.

"I don't need your help John Casey, I am a strong woman, a Doctor for christs sake, I can certainly get up by myself!" mumbling under her breath some words that would make her Gram roll over in her grave Ellie turned to face the man who had spent the last month and a half making excuses to check on her. Her anger softened slightly. But the dam had been breached and for the first time in 43 days her eyes filled with tears. She was helpless to stop them. They spilled out over her cheeks as the first sob tore out of her throat.

John briefly wondered if she had been injured before stepping forward and wrapping his powerful arms around her and pulling her to his chest. He some how managed to hold onto her while he sat back in the sand. Clutching her shaking body tightly in an attempt to calm her he rocked her back and forth rubbing her back and whispering soothing words into her hair. Even now he didn't ask her what was wrong or demand she stop he just let her be.

He lost track of time and wondered if she would ever stop crying. Gradually Ellie began to calm and the sobbing stopped. He could still feel the dampness of her tears as they fell against his chest. At least she had stopped shaking. He continued to hold her until he felt her lift her head and pull back. Her eyes were red and puffy from crying but still he was struck by how beautiful she was. Her grey eyes like the clouds after a storm. How had he spent the last year at her table every Sunday and not noticed? John was suddenly very aware that he was holding a barely clothed Ellie against his naked chest.

She hadn't realized how much she had been holding inside; as she sobbed into John's chest she let it all go. Her dream of a perfect life with Devon with the white picket fence and 2 kids. She let go of the tight control she had been using to keep everything in check. She cried for all the lost possibilities but mostly she cried for the 10 year old girl who had been forced to grow up and take care of everyone, the girl who couldn't play hopscotch or have sleep overs with pillow fights. She had opened the flood gates and there was no closing them. As she felt the water finally ease up she realized she was sitting on the sand between John Casey's legs and he was trying to comfort her. She sniffled one last time and pulled her head back to look at him. She wasn't sure what she would find. Pity? Embarrassment? She certainly didn't expect to see pain. Before the wedding fiasco Ellie had thought of John as a cardboard cutout. Stoic and strong and very much 2 dimensional but the look in his eyes at this moment spoke to depths that would make the Marianas trench look like a sidewalk crack.

"John, I'm so sorry." Her voice was horse and scratchy.

Casey shook his head "nothing to be sorry about. It had to come out sometime." He was still rubbing his hands on her back. His fingers making her bare skin tingle. John was trying really hard to think of her as part of his assignment, nothing else. Just a job.

"still" She paused and waited till his eyes met hers again. "Thank you." she leaned in and kissed his cheek, pulling back she smiled for the first time in weeks.

Later John would look back and know that was the moment the trouble had started. The moment he began to loose himself to her. That was the moment he had begun to imagine a life outside the NSA, a life that wasn't lived only for his country. That one smile meant just for him, one smile that had made her grey eyes sparkle and made him question everything.