Finding Peace: An Epilogue to The Giver
Thinking about the last few years, I don't take fragile life for granted anymore. Too much sorrow and death to be ungrateful for the moments I have on this world. But I really must backtrack for anyone to understand fully. Maybe I should even backtrack to my first time on Atreex, the community I now live in. The last time I wrote down my story, I was wandering in the snow with baby Gabe, having just escaped my first community. "First?" you most probably would ask. And to answer that would take many long hours, which is why I'm writing it all down in this little house outside Atreex.
So I had fled my community, leaving my friends Fiona and Asher, my family unit, and the Giver. I was in the snow with Gabe, and I was dying. Dying from starvation, cold, we were both dying. That's what broke my heart the most. I could not save the baby I had rescued. Then I heard something I had before only heard in memories – music. My strength renewed, I held my head high and followed the sound. Soon, I saw a pinprick of light in the horizon. An hour (or at least I think it was an hour, I had no way to tell how much time passed) later, I reached the pinprick of light. Imagine my joy when I came to the lone house, illuminated in the dark. Weak and frozen, I gripped Gabriel tightly and rapped on the door. The light in the house immediately extinguished and the door creaked open slowly. A slim woman was standing in the doorway, furtively glancing out. She looked scared.
"Who-who is it?" She asked timidly, as if expecting someone she would rather not see.
My voice cracked from weeks of disuse. "My name is Jonas and I have run away from my community. I am looking for shelter, food and warmth, though I will settle just for a bit of warmth if that is too much to ask."
The woman looked relieved. "No, no, come in," she said kindly.
Gratefully, I did so, and the woman who opened the door led me and Gabe to a table.
"Sit. I will get you something to eat. You look starved." I heard her calling to someone in an adjoining room, "Mama, we have visitors. Can you cook up something hot quickly?"
A plump elderly lady poked her head out from the room and noticed me and Gabriel. "Guests! I must get them food."
I sat down at the crude, wooden table, resting for the first time in days. The woman who opened the door sat down to across from me.
"I must admit, no one has come by this way for a very long time. You look as if you've been walking for days." If only she knew, I thought wryly. She continued, "I am Stella, by the way, and I'm excited to hear your story. Where exactly are you from? Why did you leave?"
Exhausted and hungry as I was, I was desperate to let someone know how wrong the community was and Stella seemed kind and open to hearing about what happened. I cleared my throat, and told her my account, starting with the history and lifestyle of the community and ending with the Giver and my escape. I paused only to sip the warm broth the elderly lady gave me and when Stella interrupted with inquisitive questions. Stella didn't seem surprised, however. In fact, she seemed knowing, and understanding, and empathetic, as if she could really understand, living here in warmth, with no rules, food enough to feed twenty family units.
When I was done, she spoke quietly. "You probably would like to know my story, who I am, and I will tell you. But you must promise to not ask questions until I am finished. Hear me out."
I nodded.
She began. "Long ago, ten years actually to this day, I lived with my biological mother whom you met in the kitchen, in a community similar to yours. We didn't have exactly the same rules you did, but it was clear the community Elders wanted a utopia they weren't going to get. Everything was about being the same not standing out, not "giving anyone a reason to dislike or gossip about us." And my mother and I disliked that way of living. We rounded up a bunch of people, recruited them, and started a rebellion. The Elders could not handle this, and eventually, they fled. Where they ended up, no one knows. We are always afraid they will come knocking on our doors, prepared to take over once again. The entire community soon saw the light, and we banded together, and rebuilt our community. We, too, had a Giver, but we decided to let everyone have the memories so we could learn from them and try to create the best community possible without trying to create perfection. Our new goal was to go to other communities and show them how they can be.
"Then, four years later, a boy, younger than you, happened upon us. He said he was from a community that seems almost exactly like yours. His name was Caleb."
I gave a sharp intake of a gasp.
"Is something wrong?"
"Go on."
She looked at me for assurance, and at my nod, she proceeded. "He was actually much younger than you, maybe seven or eight. He was too young to understand much about his community or how he got to us. He was dying. He looked like you did when you came in, only much worse. He didn't have you or the baby's pale eyes, though. I've never seen anything like them. Anyway, he was weak and frail, and in three days, we were mourning a boy we never really knew. Before he died, however, he did say this: 'Don't let them find me. They want me to be perfect. Only Rosemary knew what it was like.' I never really understood." She sat there, looking at her hands folded in her lap.
"I understand," I said almost inaudibly. "Caleb was a boy in my community who drowned. His family replaced him with another baby, they got a 'new Caleb.' I suppose he didn't drown. The Elders probably hushed it all up like they did about Rosemary. I guess we'll never know."
"Jonas," She started hesitantly. "Who is Rosemary?"
"Was Rosemary," I corrected. "She was the next to be the Giver, but when she saw all the memories, and how much the community gave up for Sameness, she couldn't handle it and applied for Release. Do you know what Release is?"
Stella nodded. "We have forbidden any killing in our community. Release is a euphemism for murder."
All through this time, Gabriel had been silent, but now he started to whimper.
Stella realized. "Let me give him to my mother. He needs motherly love."
I handed the little bundle over reluctantly, but I knew she was right.
"Jonas, I think you should join me on my crusade. Tomorrow, once you've had a long, good night's sleep, if it isn't too much for you, I'd like you to come with me and see what I do."
I accepted eagerly, completely ready to do something about the unjust life the communities led.
Stella's mother came into the room just then. "I don't think he's going to make the night."
My heart stopped cold. Not Gabe, not the strong little baby I'd saved from death.
"I'm afraid there is nothing more I can do, Jonas."
That night, I did not have a good night's sleep, but stayed with Gabriel, smoothing his soft dark hair, murmuring words of comfort, more for myself than for him. Eventually Stella's mother led me away to a cot in the kitchen. The next morning I was met with the inevitable news: Gabriel had not recovered well from our wandering in the snow, he was dead.I was inconsolable, nothing they could say or do would let me realize it was not my fault.
Despite the past night however, I still wanted to go with Stella. She tried to dissuade me, saying I had not recovered fully, but I was persistent. So at noon, we left the little house and she led me along a path, almost fully obscured by snow, behind the house. What I then saw took my breath away.
It was a little village, crammed with more houses than would fit. But everyone seemed happy, not just following with the rules happy, but really happy and free. Men and women and children ran around, having fun in the snow. I saw a woman holding a baby boy and I nearly broke down then and there, but knowing that it was possible for people to live in a community this cheerfully kept me going.
A few times, people would come up to us and greet Stella like an old friend, which she was, having led the revolt that let this community thrive. She would introduce me and I would feel like I was accepted, like I was a part of the community.
Now, many years later, I do have a home in Stella's community of Atreex, but am a missionary for her to help other communities remember the old times and how life can still be like that and not have to be 'perfect.' I still hold Gabriel dear in my heart and I won't ever forget him, but I have a new Assignment, and nothing like in my first community. Now I help communities find peace instead of holding back peace.