Wedding Night Blues

by RealLoveContest

Jake has proposed to Bella but can't wait until the planned wedding, so they elope. Their first attempts at intimacy are difficult and frustrating for them both.

The "Real Love" O/S Contest

Title: Wedding Night Blues

Characters: Bella and Jacob

Beta: The Mighty Ren

Disclaimer: All characters are the property of S. Meyer, the story is original. Warning: content sexual in nature.

Rating: M

Summary: Jake has proposed to Bella but can't wait until the planned wedding, so they elope. Their first attempts at intimacy are difficult and frustrating for them both.

Bella was surprised when Jake asked her in front of all of LaPush to be his wife. She surprised herself when she heard "Yes" escape her lips. He was legal age now, but they still wanted to wait another six months before tying the knot. What's six months, right?

Jacob's ring sparkled up at her as she sat on the edge of her bed contemplating how her life would change. The last ring she wore on that finger weighed a ton - on her finger and on her mind. This little piece of jewelry – which by the way dwarfed in comparison to Edward's - was a symbol of Jake's love. He saved up for months, doing odd jobs unbeknownst to Bella, so he could pay for it in cash. He sorely needed new tires for his motorcycle, but instead spent it on this little circle of gold. It displayed a series of four x's and three o's, the center "O" being a black diamond framed by the extended branches of the x's on either side. The other two smaller diamonds were placed between the remaining x's. She loved it. She loved Jacob. She loved the thought of waking up next to him each and every morning for the rest of her life.

During the first three months following her engagement it was getting harder and harder to put off the physical urges that faced them on a daily basis. Bella was the one to complain the loudest.

One night they were on Billy's couch, entwined around each other like a wisteria vine, kissing every exposed piece of skin they could find. Hands and legs were every which way. Bella felt like she was about to spontaneously combust. Jake felt like a powder keg threatening to explode, but underneath it all was a gnawing worry in his brain.

Her breath came in short pants. "What are we waiting for, Jake? We're engaged for Pete's sake. I can't stand this much longer."

"Jeez, I know Bells, believe me – this is killing me too. When I get so hot and bothered like this I . . . ," he trailed off. Jake looked at her, a blush rising in his cheeks. "C'mon Bells help me out here. It's tough to talk about guy stuff."

Bella grinned, "It's nice to see you get embarrassed for a change. I like seeing you squirm."

"God, I'm marrying a sadist!"

He sat up, pulling her with him. "C'mon, give me your hand – let's go for a stroll. I guess now's as good a time as any to have this talk."

They walked in silence, hand in hand along the shore. They finally stopped at the "bench" where they first met, and where they always had their most difficult conversations. Bella heard him let out a big sigh, as they sat down.

His warm ebony eyes gazed into hers as he explained, "I hate to say this, Bells, but maybe we should cool it for awhile."

Bella's body stiffened momentarily in amazement. "Are you saying we should stay away from each other until the wedding?"

"God, Bells, no . . . I'd die if I couldn't see or touch you. I'm just saying that we ought to be around people so we don't get so carried away."

"What if I want to get carried away?"

"That's just it . . . I don't want you to give up your goals in life for what you want right now. What if we got careless and you got pregnant? I'd never forgive myself and neither would you. I don't want you to hate me for ruining your life."

"You could never ruin my life, Jacob . . . you are my life. Anyway, there's plenty of protection available."

"Why don't you ask my cousin Naya how well her protection worked? Little Danny will be 2 yrs old in December. All her dreams crumbled to nothing. She loves the little guy, I'm sure, but she could have given him so much more if she had finished school."

"I'm sure we won't make that kind of mistake. Even if we did, it would be hard, but we could still reach our goals."

"I don't want our life together to be any harder than it needs to be. Bella, don't you see, right now, I'm like a tinder box, ready to ignite, and when I sense that you are too, it just makes it that much harder to control myself. It's to the point now that just seeing you makes my 'wolf' run wild, especially if we spend too much time alone together."

He let out another frustrated sigh. "What do you want me to do Bells?"

"Well, how about double dating with Quil or Embry," Bella offered. "They could serve as chaperones."

"Oh right . . . that'd work. We'd wind up chaperoning Quil, and Embry has to beg to even get a date. He's so backwards around women."

"As opposed to you? You were so forward, you nearly scared me away."

Jake gazed at her, incredulous, "You know that was just 'put on' now though, right?"

"If you say so."

"I say so . . . you still make me nervous Bells."

Jake looked away from those beautiful brown eyes that were scrutinizing him just now. He started fingering the symbol of his commitment that adorned her hand.

Bella's female intuition was piqued. She placed the index finger of her other hand under his chin and lifted it up so that he had to face her. "Jake, what is this really about? You know you can tell me anything."

"Bella . . . Jeez . . . How can I put this? It's just . . . just really hard being a male and having these hormones raging through my blood like a freakin' drug. It makes it so difficult to control my behavior sometimes. Just seeing you in a pair of shorts . . . it literally ignites me physically. I have to fight these impulses every damn day. It's so frustrating having to bottle it up all the time . . . this innate need for the wolf in me to mate.

Your touch or even the sight of you pushes me over the edge . . . BAM . . .! I'm a goner! I guess you should be disgusted with me, huh?"

"As much as I'm disgusted with the sun coming up over the horizon or the rain falling. It's nature, Jake. Let me ask you a question. Does having my period disgust you?"

"No, of course not."

"Well, why not?"

"Cuz you're a woman, and that's how women are, I guess."

"Exactly . . . so there you have it."

"But I'm so scared Bells. I've never been with a woman before. Suppose I can't perform. Suppose I hurt you or disappoint you. I won't know what the hell I'm doing."

"Have you talked to your dad about it?"

"Yeah, that was real helpful. He told me to do what comes naturally. If I did that, you'd be a corpse on your wedding night."

Bella smiled at him, as she twisted a piece of hair around her index finger. "Emily says she'll lend me a book about sex, if you read it too, that should calm your nerves. And for Pete's sake, go talk to Sam."

"You know, Jake, you're not the only one here that's nervous. But you know what they say about Native American men?"

"Yeah?"

Bells grinned from ear to ear, "That they make the best lovers."

"Thanks a lot Bells, That's sooo reassuring. Now I have that image to live up to . . . as if I'm not under enough pressure."

"You only have to live up to yourself. I'll tell you what I want, so how can you go wrong? There is one thing though that I was really concerned about."

"What's that?"

"The heat. I'm sure the first time is going to hurt, but being skewered with a red hot poker was a little scary. So, I spoke to Emily and she did an experiment for me. She told Sam that she wanted to see how 'hot' he could get when they made love. She put one of those fever strips on him and guess what happened? His temperature actually dropped to 99.6. She also told me that in the last couple of years, his body temperature has slowly decreased. He usually runs about 107 these days."

"I worried about that too. I did talk to Sam about it; he said that Emily had no complaints. He didn't tell me that she monitored his temperature though. Damn, you females are so devious."

"Hey, if we're going to get married, I wanted the facts, Jake"

"Okay Bells, you made me feel a little better," he added sheepishly. How soon can I borrow that book?"

"I'll get it to you tomorrow."

Jake looked thoughtful for a minute. "Man, I think sex is the biggest joke ever perpetrated on man. What was God thinking?"

"He just wanted us to learn about sharing our love and trusting each other; but especially to treat one another with respect."

"I knew that smart women were the best. God, I love you Bells." His lingering kiss said it all.

They got through the next two weeks, trying to surround themselves with people. The last Friday of that fateful period – May 7 - was a great celebration. Emily and Sam were getting married.

Jake looked rather dashing in his suit and tie. Bella wore the only formal dress she owned, the lavender velvet sheath with the satin bow at the waistline. It was the same dress that Renee had bought her for her graduation. It was certainly a hit with Jake. He couldn't keep his eyes - or his hands - off of her.

He held her intimately, enclosing her small hand over his heart as they danced to a slow, romantic number. He whispered in her ear, "Do you have any idea what you are doing to me? God, I could just eat you up."

They finished eating – their food - and Jake grabbed her hand, walking with her away from the community center where the reception was being held.

"I can't stand it Bells. You are absolutely breathtaking today." He pulled her to himself closely, tangling his hands in her softly waved mahogany hair. His lips danced up her throat, to the tender skin behind her ear, before finally reaching her waiting mouth. Jake's warmth overtook her and their combined breaths quickly came in gasps.

"I've gotta have you, Bells. This dress is slaying me," he groaned.

"Good thing our wedding is only a little more than two months away," she panted.

"I'm not going to last two more hours." Jake's smoldering dark eyes bored intensely into hers, revealing his escalating desire. He could sense it in her too; the scent of her arousal was teasing his inner 'wolf 'unmercifully.

"Bells, what would you say if I asked you to run away with me this minute? Just you and me – Jake and Bells. We could elope and be married by this afternoon. Will you do it? Will you marry me today . . .? Right now?"

Her eyes flashed brightly. "What are we waiting for?"

"You mean it?"

"Do I ever lie to you?"

"That's all I wanted to hear!"

Jake picked her up in his arms and sprinted at breakneck speed to his Rabbit. He sat her down in the front seat, grinned at her like a fool and drove off in the direction of Beaver.

He stopped off at the nearest drugstore on the way to get a few "first time" essentials. Then they were off like a shot.

They arrived at the courthouse in ten minutes. The last time he had entered this place did not hold a pleasant memory in his mind. This occasion would wipe that memory clean and replace it with one of absolute joy. They filled out the paperwork, and came to the part about the blood tests.

Bells peered at his concerned face and mouthed, "Don't worry, I've got it."

Jake ran out to the car's glove compartment and got his test results that Carlisle had sent him last week. Luckily, it was dated nine days ago. It had every test imaginable inked on the page. Maybe that run-in with the newborn had a silver lining after all - well two actually. Thank you Carlisle!

Crap, he almost forgot – he had a small bouquet of flowers in the bag of "essentials" that he bought for Bells. He snatched it up and ran to the marriage license bureau.

When he got back, Bells had put her test results back in her purse. He gave her a questioning look. "Tell you later," she answered to his unasked question.

They finished all the necessary forms and with papers in hand, they giddily trotted to the Justice of the Peace only two doors down. Jake handed the flowers to Bella and realized that he didn't have a wedding ring.

"Uh, Bells . . . we forgot something very important . . . I don't have a ring."

Bells removed her engagement ring and handed it to Jake. "Indian giver . . . you can borrow it, but only for a few minutes. I want this right back," she scolded, jokingly."

There was one couple ahead of them. Jake sat there with his knee bouncing up and down. Bells quietly placed her hand on his thigh to calm him. The door opened and the other couple walked out. The officiator beckoned to Jacob. Bells pushed her hair behind her ear, stood up and took Jake's proffered hand, squeezing it.

The justice was a quiet-spoken man with graying hair. He gave them the lecture about cleaving to each other and no one else, and not going to bed angry etc. It was really sweet. But when he finally got to the words that would bind them together as man and wife, the tears started. They could barely repeat their vows as they gazed at each other. Jake placed the ring on Bella's finger and drew her hand up to his mouth, kissing it gently. He held his breath until the justice spoke the words, "I now pronounce you man and wife."

He let out the air he'd been holding and the brightest sunniest Jacob smile lit up his face. Bells was still sniffling, but she lifted up those chocolate brown eyes and looked at him with such utter love and adoration that Jake nearly melted on the spot.

"You may now kiss . . ." The justice never got the rest of the sentence out. He chuckled softly as Jake pulled Bella into one of his bear hugs and swung her in a circle. He put her down on her feet and they kissed unashamedly in front of the official.

"I see you've got that part memorized," he said. "Now memorize how you both feel at this moment, and renew that feeling every day of your married lives. Never forget it. Never forget your love for each other. Good luck to both of you."

"Oh wait," Bells exclaimed. She got her cell out of her purse. "Could you please take a picture of us?'

The justice snapped the photo of the two with the happy expressions on their faces.

Jake shook the man's hand and steered Bella back to the Rabbit.

They were outside of town, when they noticed a cluster of cabins for nightly rentals. The sign read Black Diamond Cabins. Bells and Jake looked at each other in amazement – what a perfect place for their honeymoon.

Jake pulled up to the office and helped Bella out of the vehicle. The clerk raised one eyebrow at the way they were dressed. "Just married," Jake said with a grin.

"I tell you what, since this is the off season, I'll let you two have the large cabin out by the lake. It's pretty secluded, so no one will be able to . . . ahem . . . bother you."

"Hey, thanks." Jake signed the guest book, and was elated to write on the line, "Mr. and Mrs. Jacob E. Black." He couldn't stop smiling, even though Bells was feeling like the proverbial blushing bride. She was painfully aware of the clerk's eyes on her. She averted her own eyes and tried to focus on Jake, who still stood there smiling like the cat that ate the canary.

They drove to the cabin while Bells called Leah and left a message asking her to cover for them, letting her know that they'd be home in the morning. She'd explain everything then.

Jake scooped Bells up in his arms to carry her over the threshold. His hands were shaking so bad that he dropped the keys – twice – and had to balance his new bride on one knee while he retrieved it. Bells shrugged her shoulders and laughed quietly.

"I can walk, Jake."

"No, no, no, Mrs. Black. I want to do this up right . . . if I ever get the damn door unlocked," he muttered. "I'm gonna carry you over the threshold if it's the last thing I do. Hopefully, I'll get to do a lot more than that tonight."

Bells stretched her neck to plant a kiss on Jake's cheek. "For luck," she explained as her face changed to a shade of crimson.

The door finally opened, and Jake ceremoniously deposited Bells in the middle of the queen-sized bed. "Now don't move," he chided. "Wait right here while I go get something out of the car."

He ran like the wind, taking off his dress jacket on the way to the Rabbit. He threw it on the back seat and grabbed the supplies. He returned quickly with the grocery bag in one hand and her flowers in the other, placing them both on the dresser.

With that done, he turned to his new bride. "Uh, Bells, do you need to use the bathroom first?"

"Yeah, that's a good idea. Crap, I wish I had a toothbrush with me."

Jake dipped his hand in the bag and pulled out a couple of toothbrushes and a tube of toothpaste. He handed them over to Bells smiling all the while. "I'll be sitting here waiting patiently." That was a big fat lie and they both knew it, as evidenced by Jake's knee bouncing up and down again.

Bells was out of the bathroom in a few minutes, and Jake turned to her before entering the same room. He reiterated, as she sat on the edge of the bed, "Stay right there - don't move a muscle." Then he winked at her mischievously.

She sat there attempting to control her breathing. She looked around at her rustic surroundings - the forest scene framed in tree branches – the twisted willow chair. It did have a somewhat calming effect.

Bells was curling a strand of hair around her finger when she finally heard the door to the bathroom open. She startled at the sound.

When Jake returned to her side, he kneeled down in front of her and began to unbuckle the straps to her shiny black high heels. He looked up into her eyes as he lovingly removed each one from her feet. He took each tiny foot in his hands and kissed them delicately; then he stroked his fingers lightly over the calves of her legs, savoring the feel of her silky stockings. He let out a contented sigh.

Jake pushed Bella's high heels aside and quickly removed his own shoes and socks. He pulled Bella upright and stood back a little as he nervously attempted to open the small buttons at her neck. His fingers were trembling and Bells placed her hands over his, helping him in his endeavor. He closed his eyes as he slowly unzipped the back of her dress, but opened them again to help her remove her arms and pull it down past her hips. He stood back and stared at her, mesmerized as she stepped out of the garment.

"Bells . . ." he whispered. "My God, Bells . . . you are so beautiful. I can't take my eyes off you."

Next to silkily slip down her long legs, were her pantyhose. Jake was again on his knees smoothing his hands over her velvet skin as he helped her wiggle out of them.

She walked a little closer to Jake and removed his tie, leaving a mini kiss at his throat. He swallowed thickly as she began unbuttoning his vest, then his shirt. She pulled them both away dropping them on a nearby chair along with her dress and hose. She placed her hands on his now bare chest, and then reaching up, left moist kisses along his shoulder and the side of his neck to encourage him further.

The sight of his naked torso made her writhe in anticipation. It's not like she hadn't seen him shirtless before, but this time it filled her with a whole new connotation. He was now hers, and hers alone!

Jake began to tremble. He picked Bella up into his arms and lay her down on the bed, nestling her head on one of the pillows. He peered into her eyes with intense desire burning within.

Bells was unexpectedly surprised when he stood up and grabbed the bag from the dresser, placing it on the nightstand beside the bed.

"I hate to break this romantic moment, but what is in that bag?" she asked.

He reached over and removed a washcloth, a towel, spermicide, a packet of condoms, and a bottle of lubricant.

"You can put the spermicide and the condoms back in the bag."

Jake's face fell. "Please say you're not changing your mind Bells, unless you want to see me suddenly die of frustration."

She stroked his cheek. "No, Jake, I want this, I love you. I'm just saying we don't need them. I told you I'd explain later . . . I've had so much stress lately that my periods were becoming erratic. I didn't want to chance having it on our honeymoon, so I decided to see a gynecologist. I've been on the pill for the past two months. I just didn't want to tell you because I knew you wanted to wait till our wedding. I didn't want to make it any harder for you. So that's how I came to have the blood test in my purse."

"Did you take your pill this morning?"

"Sure, sure."

"Good," he laughed. "That's a relief."

He put the items back in the bag, but kept out the towel and the lubricant. He knelt on the bed near Bells. He allowed her to unbuckle his belt, unzip and slide his trousers down his legs. He scooted down and began kissing her stomach, drawing circles around her navel and nuzzling his nose over the swell barely peaking out over her lacy bra. He unhooked it with some difficulty and dropped it over her arms, flinging it onto the chair.

Bells automatically threw her arms up to cover herself. "Don't," Jake breathed, "I want to see all of you." He pulled her arms down gently to expose the rounded flesh.

He let out a gasp as he took in the beauty of her breasts that were now bared before him. He couldn't speak. He let his warm mouth do the speaking for him as he covered her soft mounds over and over again in light kisses.

By this time, Bells was aching for him and she began to arch her back into him. He placed the towel under her and slid her panties away; he reached down and did the same with his briefs.

Jake lay down beside Bella, his body touching every inch of hers. The feeling was completely overwhelming for the two lovers. Their hands explored each other, tracing patterns over their exposed skin. Their lips found new places to plant tiny kisses.

He kissed her again and again, touching her cheek; stroking it softly. "I can't believe it! Here I am holding you naked in my arms. It's a dream come true." His hands were still shaking; his nerves were teetering on the edge. "Man, I'm just so nervous!" He looked into her trusting eyes and suddenly he wasn't ready anymore. He hesitated, swallowed hard and dropped his head in embarrassment. "Oh God, I'm so sorry Bells, I can't . . . I can't do this yet."

"It's okay Jake, I trust you. You know that."

"No, it's not that," he blurted out, disgusted with himself. "I mean, I literally can't . . . It's gone; my 'manhood' has suddenly disappeared. I'm sorry. Jeez, there's nothing I can say. I'm . . . I'm . . . so embarrassed." He looked away from her, ashamed to meet her eyes."

"Jake," she answered; "you knew this could be a possibility. You read the book."

"Yeah, but I never thought it could happen to me. I've never had this problem when I had to . . .you know take care of business myself."

"We both have the 'first-time' jitters; that's to be expected. I knew this wasn't going to be perfect. Don't be so hard on yourself. It'll come."

"Yeah, but I wanted both of us to come."

"Come here," Bells snickered. She wrapped her arms about his shoulders snuggling up to him. "Let's lie here awhile and see if anything happens to arise."

They lay on the bed kissing and stroking each other for awhile. Jake began to deepen their kisses, letting his tongue enter Bells mouth, roaming his tongue over and under hers languidly. "Jake," she groaned, "where did you learn to do that?"

"Sam told me how, now shh!" He continued to kiss her passionately, several moans escaping his mouth. Then he reached over to grab the lubricant. "Bells, I think I'm ready . . . yeah, I'm sure of it. I am sooo ready. I'm gonna put some of this on you and some on me."

"I don't think I really need any; I've got enough for us both." He was acutely aware of that fact, since her scent was all this while torturing his 'wolf'.

Jake was adamant. "Well, I'm not willing to chance it, Bells; I want this to be as comfortable for you as possible."

He finished spreading the gel, and told Bella, "Put my hand where you want it honey. She placed it where it would do the most good. He could barely fit one finger, but he gently began to stroke the moist area. Paying close attention to the little nub of flesh - which by the way - was making her moan rather loudly, he continued kissing and "petting" her. What was the name of that little "joy button" again, he wondered? Then he decided, who cares as long as it made her moaning fill his ears. Man, those sounds excited him even more if that was possible. Bells was responding enthusiastically and it wasn't long before he felt her shudder. "Jake,'' she yelled, "Oh my God, Jake!" Her body's spasm spurred him on, as her fingers clutched at his shoulders.

If this was Jake's first sexual experience, one would never know it. To say that he satisfied her was an understatement. And to think, she had him all to herself for the rest of her life. How did she get so lucky? Holy cow, she had all she could do to stay lying down on the bed. She felt like she was going to splinter off into outer space. How could she contain this intense feeling, this exploding concentration of sensual enjoyment?

"Open your eyes, honey; share this with me . . . please." Jake whispered.

Her eyes opened in wonder and pleasure, her love for him apparent. Her pupils were so big that he felt he could get lost in them. God, how beautiful she was.

Holding her in his arms, he waited until her breathing subsided a bit. Then his nerves got the best of him again.

"Jeez, Bells, you're so tight. How am I supposed to fit myself in there? You're such a little thing and I'm a pretty big guy."

Good lord, did he have to say that? Knots were forming in her stomach. "Don't scare me," she scolded.

"I think I'm scared enough for both of us."

"You can't stop now, Jake."

Bella's panting finally slowed and Jake breathed, "Okay, but you have to help me Bells. I need you to place me."

Jake changed his position, eager to love her fully for the first time ever. He hovered over her, bracing his weight with his arms. "Bells," he quietly spoke. "You know how much I love you, right? I never wanted to ever make love to any other woman. It's always been you - always."

"I know, Jake. I love you too."

She helped to position him. "Promise me that you'll tell me to stop if it hurts too bad."

She nodded but Jake peered at her sternly. "No Bells, I mean it. I'll stop, I'll pull out, I'll do anything you ask if it starts to hurt."

"Just go slow," she warned. Then she shyly added, "Jacob . . . , do you think you could you kiss me first . . . please? I guess I'm more nervous than I thought."

He brought his lips down on hers as he slowly and carefully began to enter her. Bella's body jerked at the intrusion and she whimpered at the uncomfortable feeling of stinging and stretching.

Jacob stopped immediately. "You okay?"

"Yeah, it's a little uncomfortable, but I'm okay. Go on, keep going. Let's finish this."

Jake began again, and invoked another wince, sharper this time. "Oh, I'm sorry honey, I'm so sorry." He smothered her with tiny wet kisses.

He looked in her eyes and stroked her cheek, as he tried to apply a bit more pressure. This time she cried out . . . "No . . . wheew . . .! Stop, Jake, please stop!" She felt as if her insides were being scoured raw with coarse sandpaper. Bells knew this wouldn't be pain-free, but she never dreamed it would be this bad! Maybe if she didn't think about how big he was. But if a baby could squeeze through, surely . . .

Bells was not alone in her despondency. The tears were welling in Jacob's eyes. He wanted this to be tender and sweet and special. He couldn't stand torturing her like this. She was just so tight, it was almost uncomfortable for him too. If that damn hymen would just break already! Stupid book . . . it lied 'big time'. Yeah – "some women may experience some slight discomfort". Who were they kidding?

She noticed his distraught expression as he voiced his concern. "You want me to pull out?"

Bells placed a hand over her forehead, covering her eyes, and swallowed hard. "No . . ., just . . . just give me a minute." Her breaths came in loud whooshes as she steeled herself for another go round.

"Okay, let's try it again, but this time let's change positions. If I get on top, maybe I can control the penetration better."

At this point, they were willing to try anything.

Bells straddled Jake, which definitely rubbed him in all the right places. It set him to moaning, but made it worse for Bells. "Oh, God . . .! Ohhh . . .! No . . .! Ugh . . ! she whimpered. "I'm so sorry Jake, I can't, I can't." She began to sob.

Poor Bella, she was getting discouraged. She didn't want Jake to feel like he was being a sex-crazed beast, knowing that this rejection was killing him emotionally. He only wanted to love her, to make her happy and share his joy and his pleasure with her. Why did it have to be so painful?

For Jake - this was his worst nightmare. He was sexually frustrated, feeling guilty that he was hurting her, but at the same time starting to feel the pleasure from her body barely closing around him. It was too much!

He reluctantly pulled away from her. "No, Jake, please, I can't leave you like this. Show me what to do, so I can give you some relief tonight .And then, we can try again later, okay?"

"I don't know, Bells . . ."

Jake succumbed to her simple request. He tightened her hands around him and showed her how to bring him to release. When his body calmed they hugged each other tightly and fell asleep for awhile.

Two hours later, Bells woke up determined to get the "first time blues" over with. She could take it; after all she was a woman now! It was about time she cowgirled up! A quote from John Wayne suddenly popped into her head: "Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway." The difference here was - she would be the one under the saddle. She lifted her head from Jacob's chest and began brushing her lips over his abdomen and down lower until his head jerked up in surprise.

He opened one eye. "Not a chance, Bells, I'm beginning to think that maybe this was a really stupid idea."

"No, you're being stupid right now! And anyway, nothing we could do together could ever be stupid. Now get out the KY."

"I can't stand it; I'm hurting you. I don't want to hurt you anymore Bells."

"Me neither, so let's get this over with. We're married Jake, don't you think you might want to make love to your wife every so often? I'm ready so let's go!"

They spread the "goose grease" all over, began their little tongue dance and even against his better judgment, Jake was ready in a heartbeat. Yeah, she really had that effect on him!

This time he placed a pillow under her hips, hoping against hope that it would ease the process.

He started slowly once more, and Bells instinctively stiffened. "God, why does this have to be so hard? I just want to love you Bella . . . Please . . . Please . . . Listen to me Bells. You're tensing up. That's only gonna make it worse. You've gotta try to relax; maybe if you take a couple of deep breaths. C'mon, try to relax honey, that's right, relax and draw me in. Let me fill you up. What if you pull your knees up a little more?"

"Is there something I can do to help you? Tell me what to do, Bells. This is tough for me too."

"Just kiss me, Jacob; do that thing with your tongue again," she pleaded.

He gave her a long lingering kiss trying to distract her while he pushed slightly harder this time. She let out a loud cry. Then breathed, "Wait - give me a second . . . Wheew . . .Okay, just a little more Jake, I think we're almost there."

"I know; I can feel it!"

He slipped in a little further, and suddenly with one more thrust and one more small whimper, he and Bells were one body. With deliberate effort, Jake restrained himself from moving, afraid of causing her any more discomfort.

Suddenly her mouth was traveling all over him. "You did it, Jacob . . .you did it. God, I love you, I love you, I love you." she exclaimed in between kisses.

"Ugh . . .Bells, you feel sooo good right now, I really feel like I need to move. Oh man, this is so hard for me. I don't think I can hold myself back any longer. Is it okay if I move a little?"

"I'm okay, Jake - go ahead - do what feels natural."

He moved as slowly as he could, but enough so that he could feel the tension mounting. He gripped Bella's hips pulling her closer. It didn't take long before his release erupted inside of Bella's body. He was hoping he would be able to sustain his erection longer, to prolong the journey so to speak; but being the first time - being "one" with her - he just couldn't hold on to it. His body shuddered in waves of pleasure and he cried out an emotional, "Oh God, Bella . . .! Bells . . .! Bells!" Each echoing call of her name was encased in its own puff of breath. In that moment the earth froze on its axis. Time lost all meaning. There was no one on the planet, but Bella . . . His Bella.

While they were still "one", he tearfully held her in his arms and choked out, "Can you believe it? Our bodies are literally united Bella, I end where you begin. We're no longer separate; we're part of each other." Then he added wistfully, "I couldn't bear it if you left me now. Please, Bells . . ., please say you'll never leave me."

Bella ran her fingers through his soft hair and cooed words of love into his ear. "Never, Jacob . . . I could never leave you. Don't even think that."

When their bodies finally parted, Jake wet the washcloth with soap and water and lovingly wiped the remaining traces of blood and lubricant that had coated her. He handed her a pad and removed the blood-stained towel.

"You bought me sanitary pads too? God, I love you Jacob Black!"

She looked at him again, smiling and snickered, "I am so in love with you Jacob, but boy I'm glad that's over with. What a tough job that was!"

Jake raised an eyebrow, "You don't need to tell me. I had to do all the work! I was beginning to think we were doomed to be virgins till the day we died."

They nestled, naked in each other's arms, kissing and fondling one another. They talked about the future, but mostly what they would do once they returned to LaPush.

They couldn't help the silly grins that were plastered on their faces. Jake finally quipped, "You know if I had a cigarette, I'd be lighting it up about now, and I don't even smoke. What about you, honey, you want a puff? I think I might have a pack in that bag back there."

Bells rolled her eyes at him. "What am I going to do with you?" she complained.

"Anything you want!" he chortled.

Bells answered him with a playful slap to his shoulder. Her eyes cast down in mock contrition as she said, "I'm sorry. I didn't mean that. Let me kiss the boo boo."

She kissed the offended area, and started to trail up his neck, when Jake pulled her into another tight embrace. "All is forgiven, Mrs. Black. I won't hold it against you . . . wait . . . what am I saying? I'm already 'holding it' against you."

She swung her hand out the second time, but this time he was too fast at evading her. Bells essentially swiped at the air, before he caught her hand and licked her palm. "Will you look at that," he groaned, "married a few hours and she's got me eating out of her hand already."

"Anybody ever tell you that you talk too much, Jake?"

"Yep, you got a problem with that Swan . . . I mean, Black?"

"No, I've got the remedy." She grabbed a fistful of his hair, and yanked his mouth forward to meet hers. That shut him up . . . except for the sighing . . . and the moaning. His tongue kept right on going though, if you get my meaning. I guess all that constant chatter kept his tongue in tip top condition. Who knew?

Dinnertime rolled around and Bells could hear the rumble in Jake's stomach. It was almost as loud as the engine of her truck. She started to reach over to the chair to get her clothes. Jake stopped her dead in her tracks. "Don't put those on yet. I want to feast my eyes on you first. I want to see every single, gorgeous inch of you."

Bells suddenly looked shy. "You're not disappointed, are you?"

"What? No, why?"

"I thought maybe you were hoping that I'd be wearing a bigger bra - you know what I mean?"

"A man only needs a couple of handfuls," he snorted.

"Yeah, I know, but look at the size of your hands, Jake."

Jacob doubled over, roaring with laughter. "It's not how big they are, it's what you do with them. Which reminds me . . . how did I measure up? I wasn't too 'hot' to handle was I?"

"You were perfect. I knew you would be, after all you're 'my Jacob'."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah, you were. It makes me kind of sad for some other girls . . . I mean can you imagine if it was Quil."

"Okay, that does it. I'm gonna have a talk with that untamed beast. Give him some pointers. I don't want him ruining some girl so that she's turned off of sex for the rest of her life."

Bella nodded her head. "You tell him, Jake."

She shifted uncomfortably in the bed. "Jake, can you hand me another pad, please?"

He pulled one from the bag handing it to her. Jacob gazed at her, worry wrinkling his brow. Then he reached out and lightly stroked her arm. "You're still bleeding, huh? Jeez, Bells, I'm sorry." He nuzzled her cheek and placed her clothes on the bed next to her."

"It's not your fault that I'm a woman."

A serious expression crossed his features, as he ran his hand over the back of his head. "I don't care whose fault it is; I'm just glad you're my woman. I feel like God personally sent you to this earth to find me . . . I'm so grateful that he did. It would have been a lonely existence without you Bells."

The sound of Jacob's stomach protesting interrupted the conversation.

She reached over and inadvertently rested her hand on Jake's abdominal muscles. "Can we get dressed now?" she asked innocently.

That irresistible "Jacob" smile returned to his face. "Not if you're gonna start doing that again!" he smirked.

She flinched, and Jacob added, "Just kidding, Bells. We gotta stop to eat sometime, dammit."

Bells stood up and began dressing alongside Jacob. "Zip me up, please?"

"Do I have to?" he whined. "I'm so much more skilled at unzipping." He pretended to pout as he zipped up the back of her dress. He stopped halfway, brushing his lips over a small mole on her back, and then reluctantly pulled the zipper tab up to her neckline.

When Bells walked to the bathroom to fix her disheveled hair, he noticed that she was walking hesitantly. "Bells, are you sure you're okay?"

"I'm fine, I just feel like I've been riding a horse all week."

"The Black Stallion?"

"You could say that again."

All traces of levity were suddenly gone. Jake was dead serious. He moved up behind her gently rubbing her shoulder and arm. He spoke quietly into her ear, "God, Bells, you can barely walk. I can carry you."

"Do you want everyone to know we were playing 'cowgirls and Indians' in here?"

He pressed his cheek against hers, speaking softly. "Are you kiddin' me? These people are too busy with their own little games. But I mean it, Bells, I'll carry you."

"What do you want me to tell people? That I sprained my ankle?"

"Hey, excellent idea, but I better tell it. I know what a bad liar you are."

Jake did indeed carry Bells out to the car, and from there to the restaurant. They were both ravenous. That little bit of strenuous activity warmed up their appetites. The service was great, since the staff all felt sorry for the poor girl. Imagine, spraining your ankle on your honeymoon.

That night before falling asleep, Bells asked her new husband, "Jake, did you want to make love with me again? We don't have to say goodnight yet."

His eyes shone with the light of affection. "You know I'm crazy about you Bells, and I could love you all night long, right? But Bells, you need some time to heal. We'll be able to make love for the rest of our lives. The next time we play 'cowgirls and Indians' though, I'm gonna surrender my 'better half' to you."

"I thought you already did," she snickered.

Jake put his hand over his chest, in mock indignation. "Then why have I been shot through the heart?"

"Well, you started it. You took Cupid's bow and aimed that arrow right at me. It's stuck in there so tight, I can't loosen it."

"I guess we're at an impasse then. Truce?"

"Sure, sure. I think I'm going to like this treaty."

"Let's go over the terms," Jake growled. Bells laughed as he playfully attacked her.

They settled down a few minutes later, sleep overtaking them.

"Goodnight, Mrs. Black." He loved saying that.

"Goodnight Mr. Black." She loved hearing it.

They snuggled together, as the "Wedding Night Blues" came to an end, fading away into what quietly became the "Wedding Night of Bliss".

A/N: If you think this defloration was farfetched, Think again. Except for the initial "bump" this was my experience, except I didn't have a patient, sweet guy like Jake. My experience was without any lubrication to boot. It was painful and devoid of any tenderness. It's a miracle I ever got over it.

26