~Shade's POV~
A blast of steam made me feel warm, but it was short-lived. Just a few seconds later, I was cold and wet. If one bothered to look around, which was nearly impossible in the suffocating darkness, they would know that my current location was deep within the caves by Sleepywood, sitting by one of the craters in the floor. The only thing was, I'm in one of the deepest crevices of the caves, in place unmarked on any map that I knew of. Just a little space connected to the rest by a crack only a bit larger than my head, and pretty tough to get through with all the ups and down, often resulting in scratches long before you've reached either end. I had never bothered with a name for the space, and there's really no reason to. It's not as though this place matters to anybody, much less its existence known to anyone else. I mean, it matters to me, seeing as it's like my 'home', so to speak. It wasn't much, just a little cramped quarters; not very ideal, but it did well to shelter from the outside. Kept the drakes out, kept people out, all the like. So, yes, it does matter to me, but I don't necessarily count as a person.
No, not one bit.
It's not that I'm depressed about it, or that I hate myself or anything, it's just the nature of that spell.
Tch. More like a curse.
Although it wasn't all bad and turned out for the greater good, I couldn't help but feel upset. I simply felt like the price had been too painstakingly high. Much too high. But, looking back, and thinking about Mapleworld since I've 'woken up', I don't regret it. Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if I didn't, sometimes even gone as far to wish to redo that day, but to regret it?
That was a bit of a stretch.
I can't help but miss my friends.
Which is what makes me consider to regret the decision in this first place.
The only thing is that I can't bring myself to. Like I aid, regret it a bit of a stretch to describe how I feel towards the subject.
All this time alone gives me only a few things to do. Think, read, write, anything to get away from the dreaded silence.
...
...
...
I remember a time when I loved the sound of silence. Just pure mental and physical stillness. I loved to constantly be reminded of my lack of socialization with other people, because I used to be so obsessed with spirits. Nature spirits. Death spirits. All spirits, except for human ones. I hated those; always so greedy and selfish. On a daily basis, I would spend all my time with them. Sitting in my room, talking with them, or even just sitting with them. So obsessed.
Oh, so obsessed.
And then came the 5 Great Heroes of Mapleworld. They, obviously, were not the official heroes quite yet, but they were becoming a popular topic of talk. Not that it mattered to me in my unhealthy state. I suppose I was 12 or 13 at the time, the 5 having been travelling and helping people along their travels. One day they came upon my hometown, and of course, the only thing any of the terrified townsfolk told them was of the possessed boy who lived in so-and-so and whatever was possessing him wanted to rule them and so-and-so. Even now, looking back, the attention the spirits would sometimes demand from me wasn't the best for my mental health, but they never intended to rule or harm anybody. Oh, but the townsfolk came to my house and left offerings for the demon in the body of a young boy who had apparently made a deal, or said the rumors. It annoyed me, but I could do nothing about it. Everyone was on there knees, shaking, if I even left my room, much less went outside and spoke to people. Constantly being inside and hardly mobile left me skinny and pale, which I never changed throughout my life. I liked being flexible and agile. My mother, though, which was what scarred me at first, was absolutely terrified of me, and on the few occasions we saw each other, looked at me more like a monster than her only child. The spirits soon took the place of the outside world, and it ceased to bother me, though.
I had stopped caring, at that point in time. I was still as obsessed as ever. In the room, most of my time was either spent sitting, on my knees, standing, or pacing, with candles, boards, quiet mantras, chalk, and a dusty floor. Any other time was spent eating and the occasional night's rest.
The memory of that day was clear in my head.
I had been standing before a complicated drawing in the middle of my room, with an old book that seemed much too heavy for my small frame to carry as I chanted a verse from it. The middle of the circle would spark on occasion, but my focus was incredibly off that day. I felt like something was going to happen. Something big, something that would cause a ripple effect in my life.
My usually void, purple eyes showed annoyance, and my brow furrowed in confusion. The chant had worked for my the day before, so I didn't understand why I couldn't at least focus.
"Shit!" I had cursed in annoyance, letting the book hit the ground with a satisfying *THUD*, which resulted in some of the dust sparking up and into my eyes. There was even a thin mist that would drift through the air. I paced whenever I wasn't summoning, and I tended to kick up the dust left by the chalk when I did so. There was a feeling of restlessness in my limbs, and I finally noticed the sound of multiple footsteps coming towards me. No one ever came up here. After all, they were all scared. The stinging feeling of the dust in my eyes and the dust going into my naval cavities was soon forgotten in the curiosity of who would dare to come here, to the possessed child?
"Must be some new people, or something." I tried to assure myself, but I also couldn't help but feel anxious at the same time. Were they sent here to exterminate me, in order to remove the demon? It's not like I would be missed. No one remembers the 'real child' that used to be me. The only thing is, I'm still... kind of... me. I'm me. There was no way around it, in my mind. My hand got to dusting myself off a bit as I sat down on the side of the circle, opposite the door, and waited. A few seconds passed, when 5 strange-looking people had suddenly entered. The mix of colors and light blinded me momentarily, but physically, I had remained unfazed. There were 2 females and 3 males, each brandishing a different-looking weapon in front of them, each carefully sizing me up, until I noticed they were a bit surprised at the 'target'. They seemed about the age of 19 or 20 at the time, not too much older than I was, but at the same time, they were. They were dressed like foreigners, so that concluded my idea of them not being the from the town; not that I remembered the faces, much less the names of the neighbors.
The blonde female on the far right, I guessed to be an elf or fairy of some sort, judging from her attire and ear. The spirits sometimes tell me of them. IN her hand had been dual bow guns; I later learned her name to be Mercedes.
Next to her was Aran, with her white hair, her more northern-style-based clothing, holding the pole-arm in her tight grip. Even then, I could see the brightness of her eyes.
Then, on the far left, you've got the royally dressed Phantom, with his cane, blonde hair, and bright eyes, and the laugh lines worn into his cheek told me that this person was generally cheerful, but he was now a bit more solemn.
Next to Phantom there was the silver-haired mage with a staff in his hand, being the solemn Luminous, possibly the most serious I'd ever seen him.
In the middle was brown-haired Freud with his own staff, red robes hanging off his shoulders as he leaned forward. He had a more gentle, more kind look on his face. More welcoming.
My gaze hadn't rested on any particular person for long, being my disinterested self, until Freud suddenly placed his staff gently on the floor, kept his hand held up towards me in a surrender position, only to DARE to get closer to me without his weapon, and sit on his knees on the other side of the circle. His eyes had shown no intent to fight without reason, so I lost a bit of the tension in my shoulders.
"Hello. My name is Freud." He had paused, then continued.
"Would you like to tell me your name?" The other 4 waited patiently behind him, not quite sure what Freud was playing at. We both sat in silence for a few minutes, with the occasional cough from one of them accidentally breathing in the dust that often reminded me of the term 'marine showers'.
"My name is Eunwol." I finally spoke. My voice was soft and gentle. I didn't yell, I didn't tell them to leave. I just wanted to see where this would go. The others didn't seem to expect me to answer, but Freud had held his ground.
"You know, it's really dark and dusty in here. Would it be alright to open a window?" I honestly considered it for a few seconds, only to then shake my head, resulting in some of the dust falling from my long, dark hair.
"Death Mark doesn't like the light. Whenever he comes over he gets upset if there's light, so I keep the window closed for him." I found myself with my knees to my chest, resting my chin on my left knee. Freud tilted his head, a bit confused at the odd name. As were the others.
"Whose Death Mark?"
"A death spirit." I answered simply, which surprised Freud just a bit.
"Do you do everything he tells you to?"
"He doesn't talk a lot, but when he does ask me to do something, then I do it."
"Why?"
"I just... do." My gaze traveled over to the grimoire I had been holding shortly prior.
The memory dispelled from my mental grasp from my thoughts when the crater began ejecting steam, only to stop and leave me even more wet than I was before. The distant cry of a drake elsewhere in the system told me they were beginning to leave for the day, leaving the females to watch the eggs and young. Now, I could go get a bite to eat while they were gone. Don't particularly want to cause a sudden decrease in the population out of self defense. People would definitely notice that.
The sources of the cries became more and more distant, until finally, I couldn't hear them anymore.
With a heavy sigh, the weight of my knuckles on my hands and fox marbles bouncing at my sides, I began to climb out of my living space, careful not to hit my head but not particularly caring about the multiple shallow cuts I received on my appendages and torso. The blades of the knuckles often clacked on the wall, but other than that, the only noises were the occasional drip-drop of water from stalactites. It didn't take me long to reach the main tunnel system, already knowing all the different areas in the cracks, which were easiest to get through and which were the quickest. This time, I'd gone with the quickest. With mating season over, the drakes would be leaving later and coming back earlier. It was quite a pain, but nothing could be done about it without causing an uproar. The main system was filled with support beams and ropes, left by explorers and archaeologists and all the general sort.
My knuckles now hanging at my sides, my calloused hands and scraped feet helped me up the rope until I finally reached the top. I was momentarily blinded by the bright sun, but it was much warmer outside than it was inside, and for that, I was grateful.
The semi-numb feeling left my body, so I looked down. I was wearing the same thing I always wore. A yellowed, ragged top that only covered my back the sides of my chest, town, grayed pants, and I didn't need to look to know there was a once-red piece of cloth, faded to such a light shade of pink it looked almost white, on my head to keep the tangled, black mess that was my hair out of my face. Not like a ponytail, but like that cap I see the swashbucklers wearing on occasion.
"I guess I'll go to Ellinnia." My voice voiced my decision to nobody in particular as I removed a scroll from one of the pockets on the inside of my shirt, read what it said aloud, and found myself in Ellinnia, standing on one of the wooden bridges, well away from the town.
Before I realized it, I was looking over the side of the bridge, unable to see the bottom.
Just how easy would it be to fall from here?
Would I keep falling forever?
If I didn't would I feel my bones breaking?
Would fate be so cruel as to make me stay alive during that painstaking moment?
Or would it just be over?
Where would my soul go?
Would it be forced to wander for eternity?
Would it become a spirit?
Would I go to where Freud is?
Would he remember me?
Do the natures of spells not effect people in the afterlife?
What if there is no afterlife?
What if I simply would cease to exist?
Would the nature of the spell be dispelled from the living if I died?
Would they remember me afterwards?
Or would I go quietly and unnoticed, as though I never existed in the first place?
I shook my head, still staring over the edge.
"It wouldn't be easy to fall," I told myself as I walked towards the grotesque one-eyed creatures, putting my knuckles back on.
"Because there are too many risks." I heard whispers as I slew the lizard-like life forms left and right, able to identify them as all from one person, but I ignored it.
I was back in my living space. The whispers had followed me back to the space I called home, and was starting to bother me. Usually, it was just an unfortunate onlooker who happened to see me, but soon enough they left. But whoever voiced these whispers followed me back. And I just couldn't bring myself to care. Usually, if a person saw me, it was an unfortunate onlooker who happened to see me, the pathetic person I am, but soon enough they left and moved on with their lives. But whoever voiced these whispers either followed me back, or I've just gone insane. More likely the latter. I had already finished eating something that I would not like to name, or describe, so I laid on the floor by the crater as sleep slowly overwhelmed me.
There was less worry on my mind.
Why?
Because maybe the owner of the whispers will end it in my sleep.
Fewer risks that way.
Sorry if I got a name wrong or something, but to be perfectly honest I have not played in ages and I can't because of my Chrome version. So at first I figured I could just downgrade or update or something, but my computer's been really jacked-up recently, and I don't want to do anything that could possibly make it worse. And yes, I have been running things on it like the Anti-Malwarebytes program, but I already did that before. It picked up like... a thousand things, but after quarantining and uninstalling them and everything, I was still having problems, which I would guess other maleware-removing programs, since every time it's just a random tab opening and saying 'DOWNLOAD THIS TO SOLVE YOUR VIRUS PROBLEM' Well, how do you know I have a virus problem? Could it possibly be that you're giving it to me because you want my business? .
And don't worry, I might actually be updating later tonight. The Kuwaemasu story. I just got bored in school since most of the finals are over so I decided to work on something that I could actually remembered where I was picking up on, which happened to be this.
Das vedania!