Title: I've Been Alone All Along
Author: shehasadestiny
Rating: K
Tagline: Though you're still with me, I've been alone all along
Summary: Song fic set to Evanescene's "My Immortal". Boomer and Helo pairing. Mostly set on the Galactica, with a bit of story set on Cylon-occupied Caprica as well. Mostly from Galactica Boomer's POV
Spoilers: Battlestar Galactica: Miniseries, some first season
I'm so tired of being here
Suppressed by all my childish fears
And if you had to leave
I wish that you would just leave
Cause your presence still lingers here
And it won't leave me alone
Boomer watched Helo sleep, a tired, worn-out expression on his otherwise sleep-relaxed face. She smiled to herself; even if she was a Cylon, and not supposed to be capable of love . . . that was certainly what she was "programmed" to feel about Karl C. Agathon. She wanted to run her hand over his face to smooth the worries away from him. But she couldn't; not without waking him up, and she wanted him to get a good deal of sleep before the other Cylons discovered where they were. A gunshot rang through the woods and she was forced to shake him awake. "Huh?" he muttered sleepily.
"Just come on!" she hissed, grabbing the bag and then helping him to his feet. "We've got to go, and we've got to go now!"
These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase
When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you screamed I'd fight away all of your fears
And I've held your hand through all of these years
But you still have, all of me
Sharon Valerii did not like to cry. She didn't like to need to cry, either. She didn't like crying in general. But since the attacks on the Colony worlds, she'd been doing an awful lot of it. Since . . . she'd had to leave Karl Agathon behind. That decision would always haunt her. For the rest of her life, she'd be bombarded with images of that fateful day when the Cylons attacked the Colonies and she'd left Karl behind in a rescue operation. She had been almost in tears that day, but she'd kept it back to be strong for Boxey, who, if not a replacement for Karl, was certainly a good kid.
You used to captivate me
By your resonating life
But now I'm bound by the life you left behind
Your face, it haunts, my once pleasant dreams
Your voice, it chased away all the sanity in me
"CYLON". The word had been scrawled in yellow . . . yellow something across Sharon's locker mirror. It scared her; she wasn't a Cylon! She hurriedly scrubbed it away and looked around for anyone who might have seen it. Cylon. That word would haunt her the rest of the day . . . as would the mistake of leaving Karl behind. She missed him horribly, and she wanted him back. She kept telling herself that she loved Chief Tyrol, but . . . she knew that deep down, she loved Karl more. She always had . . . she'd just been afraid to admit it. A relationship with her ECO was almost as dangerous as the one she'd been carrying on with Chief . . .
These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase
When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you screamed I'd fight away all of your fears
And I've held your hand through all of these years
But you still have, all of me
Caprica Boomer fell to the ground with the impact of the shot Helo had fired against her. Helo could still remember the feel of shooting her, and how good it had felt to know he'd killed a Cylon, but how much it hurt to know she'd killed Sharon. Oh good Lords of Kobol, how he'd miss Sharon. He'd loved her with everything in him; his soul had been hers, and her soul, his.
I'd love to walk away
And pull myself out of the rain
But I can't leave without you
I'd love to live without you
The constant fear and endless doubt
But I can't live without you
Sharon lay on her bunk, staring up at empty nothingness. She missed Karl. She missed him horribly. She hadn't seen Chief all day, in favor of sulking over missing Karl. She didn't feel well, and she missed being with him . . . her new ECO, Crashdown . . . well, he didn't quite measure up to the standards Karl had put down before he'd been left behind. He was a great kid, but he wasn't a match for Karl. Karl, the greatest ECO in the world. Karl, the best friend in the world. Karl, who'd always had her back. Karl, who'd said, "Look at those clouds, Sharon. Just look at them, and tell me this isn't the end of everything . . ."
When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you screamed I'd fight away all of your fears
And I've held your hand through all of these years
But you still have, all of me
Sharon stared at the empty seat. She'd hidden in the Raptor to escape the constant noise and bustle of the rest of the massive battlestar. She wished she could go back for Karl, but there wasn't anything she could do. Nothing, whatsoever. The thought made her sick, and she wanted to go throw up. Wanted to get away from the Galactica, and go back to . . . Was she even sure he was still alive? With a sigh, she admitted that she wasn't even sure that her ex-ECO was still alive at all. Maybe, just maybe . . . You never know, Karl always did have a stubborn survivalist streak . . .