My first Warriors parody! Whoot, whoot! Whoot, whoot! BTW, yes, I love Warriors, but who doesn't like to make a parody every now and then? It just spreads the love, like butter on toast. –butter spreading motion-
Note: I do not own Warriors. I did, however, write this FanFic, and you will see a lot of Warriors characters that I made up in here. But you'll also see the original Warriors characters (I don't own those either). I also don't own anything mentioned in the story (Phone companies, phone brands and type, etc., I don't own any of it)
-0-
"What is it?" Firestar asked, poking the Twoleg object Hollypaw'd sat on the ground.
"I think it's called a 'cell phone'," Hollypaw mewed. She picked it up and pressed some random numbers. Hollypaw understood some Twoleg, but not all of it.
When she pressed the button that was Twoleg for "Talk," she heard Twoleg gibberish on the other line. She snapped it closed. "Some Twoleg was on the other 'line.' I think we can call other people with this thing!"
Firestar's eyes widened and he ran around randomly in circles screaming, "The Twolegs are invading!"
Hollypaw slapped her grandfather. "Thanks for that," he meowed uncertainly.
-0-
One moon later…
-0-
"OMG! Guess what Heatherpaw just texted me!" Hollypaw yowled at Jaypaw.
"I'm blind, not deaf, but I can see you are working on that," he grumbled snappishly.
"She said Lionpaw snuck out to meet her the other day! OMG!"
"You just said 'OMG.'" Jaypaw stared at Hollypaw blankly.
"I just have to text her back!" Hollypaw purred, pressing buttons furtively.
After Hollypaw had found the phone on the side of the road, she (And her friends and various warriors) had charmed Twolegs and snuck their phones away.
Due to the Twolegs having their own phone companies like Alltel and Sprint, the cats of WindClan had somehow figured out a way to have their own phone company, and instead of Twoleg "money," they made their customers pay fresh-kill. It was an all-around smart idea.
"LOL!" Firestar called out randomly, as he was texting Gingerstar on his cell phone. Jaypaw snapped his head in the direction of his grandfather, and leader, and sighed.
"Am I the only one without one of those stupid Twoleg things?" he yowled out.
"Yeah," Lionpaw purred as he passed by Jaypaw, as he was texting Heatherpaw (As was Hollypaw).
"You all are so stupid!" Jaypaw hissed, feeling angst-y.
-x-
In RiverClan…
-x-
Gingerstar texted Firestar, telling him she would BRB.
"OMG, are you texting Firestar?" Graytail asked, gasping.
"Don't worry, baby, I don't like him. We're just BFFs."
"Now you are BFFs?" Graytail yowled angrily.
"Don't worry, baby," Gingerstar repeated, licking Graytail furiously.
"Let's have kits, baby!" Graytail meowed happily.
"Let's!" Gingerstar purred. "Let me text Firestar and tell him I've got to go have kits with you."
"Argh!" Graytail slammed his head into the side of Gingerstar's leader's den.
-x-
In WindClan…
-x-
Crowfeather texted Leafpool from his cell phone. He said, "i love u so much, leafy. i'll text u l8er, the mate is comin."
"Crowfeather! What are you doing?" snapped Nightcloud.
"Nothing, my little matey-watey!" Crowfeather purred, licking Nightcloud. He was still in love with Leafpool, and now that Hollypaw had discovered cellies, he could text Leafpool all day long. Sometimes they would meet up when no one suspected.
"Okay!" Nightcloud purred back. She wasn't the sharpest claw on the paw, if you know what I mean. "I'm going to go and text Darkheart!"
She ran off to text the ThunderClan cat.
Crowfeather's phone made a little bing, signaling that he had a text. He lunged for his phone and started texting his real love, again.
-x-
In ShadowClan…
-x-
Russetfur was yammering quietly on her cell phone (Which had been blinged up, thanks to Hollypaw finding and giving some to ShadowClan) to Blackstar, even though he was in his den about two seconds away.
"I love you so much, Blackstar," she purred into her phone.
"But I love you more, Russetfur," Blackstar purred back.
"No, I love you more, Blackstar," Russetfur mewed.
"No, I love you more," Blackstar growled.
"No, I love you more!" Russetfur screamed.
And on it went.
-0-
Check back next time for when the Warrior cats find computers, oooo! Also, review! You can leave ideas of what technology the Warriors should find for different chapters!