Two days had passed.
Two days and we all continue to grieve, but life must continue with the routines of before this tragedy. We all need more time, but the pressing demands of reality and the present do not allow for it.
I'm once again attempting to console the hardest hit by Jean's loss, Logan and Scott. They have changed greatly in these days. The man who loved her and was loved back and the loner who thought he had found in her a woman to share his life no longer felt the need to compete for dominance. They draw strength from one another, each knowing the other's pain as none of us can. Like all of us, accepting that this fate was Jean's choice is the hardest thing, but they are men who would give their lives to save the one's they love so they are coming to terms with it.
Our session today is drawn to an abrupt end by students arriving for their English Lit class. As the grieving pair leaves the room and the children settle in to learn, something whispers across my mind.
Something . familiar.
Something I never thought I would feel again.
Something . impossible?
There it is again, but it can't be. It's so faint, I must be imagining things. Wishful thinking, I think with a sad smile.
"Xavier" a third time. Still weak, but undeniable that time. Gazing out the window and looking at nothing, hope blossoms in my chest and spreads throughout my body.
"Jean" I reply this time, somehow knowing she is there and listening and needs to know I hear her.
I was correct, I sense peace now where there had been worry from her. Is she simply saying another good-bye or has a miracle occurred?
The students are restless from my preoccupation and one speaks up to stir me from my thoughts, asking, "Professor, is everything all right?"
Even if I am being an overly optimistic fool, as Erik has often accused, a smile touches my lips and I answer with complete conviction, "Yes, I think it will be."
I begin the class, but my mind is feverishly focused on another task. It is planning, calculating, and speculating possibilities. We must work quickly.
After 45 minutes the class is over and the students sent off with their assignments. I call for Logan to return to my office as we have some time before my group of students arrive.
"You rang?" he asks, with some of his former fire, when he arrives.
"Thank you for coming so quickly, Logan. I have a matter of great importance that I need you assistance on immediately." I state gathering up the notes and instructions I'd made during class.
"Now isn't a very good time, Chuck."
"I know. It is difficult for us all, but as I said it is a matter of great importance and we must begin work today. I fear any more time wasted will lead to greater sorrow for us all." Wheeling over to my desk, I open a draw and pull out a credit card and two keyrings. "We must rebuild Cerebro. I have here a list of materials I need you to gather. You'll find the credit limit on this card to be no issue, take it and buy everything you can today. The items listed should be easy to locate, but you may have to visit a few places to get all we need.
"This key is to a storage facility about 30 miles from here, instructions to get there are among those papers. Inside the space I've rented you'll find the most important and irreplaceable pieces to the machine, handle everything with great care. These keys are to the Jeep Cherokee in the garage, it should have enough room for most of the supplies, have anything that doesn't fit delivered here."
He looks everything I've just shoved into his hands, then at me. "Whoa. All this has happened because of Cerebro and you want to rebuild the thing? I vote for destroying it, bub."
"I understand how you feel, Logan, but the events that led you to form that opinion will not be repeated. Cerebro is essential to us in finding and protecting fellow mutants. It is for that reason we must get it fixed and fixed fast. I sense a mutant in danger."
Logan is by no means stupid and he quickly puts the pieces of this puzzle I'm presenting him together. His head snaps up and he nearly growls, "Jean?!"
"Please do not get your hopes up, Logan. This is a difficult time for us all and my powers my simply me grasping at straws, unable to accept the reality of her death."
"But you've sensed her?" he demands.
Sighing, I nod and turn to look out the window toward the west.
"Alive?" he practically whispers the word from behind me.
"I do not know. That is why I must get Cerebro working again. I need you on this, Logan, and I need you not to tell anyone of what we're doing." I turn to make sure he understands the sensitivity of this project.
Without another word, he nods and leaves the room. Confident that my instructions will be carried out swiftly, I go to meet my next class.
~*~
Even knowing Logan's commitment to this project, I was very surprised when he came to me that night to tell me all the materials had been collected. Someday when I have more time, I will have to ask him how on earth he managed that feat. Time is of the essence now, though, and we've much work to do.
Fighting the fatigue that has haunted me since my ordeal in Cerebro 2, I move with Logan down to my Cerebro. Stacked outside it's doors are numerous boxes and sheets of various metals.
"Where are the items from storage?" I ask.
He leads me to a pile of boxes set somewhat apart from the others and grunts indicating these are what I need.
"Good. I'll check these to make sure they are still in working order. I would like you to begin assembling everything the second I've checked it. I took the time you were shopping to make some diagrams to assist you." Handing him said drawings, I open the first box.
Ah, my helmet. It seems to be in fine condition, but I will not know until it is completely hooked up. In the next three boxes I find the outer casing for the computer. This part was easy, so I hand it over to Logan to put together, asking the front panel be left off so the actual computer can be more easily placed inside. Without hesitation he gathers a blowtorch and some other tools and enters the chamber to get to work.
The next four boxes contain the more specialized computer chips and conductors. I'll have to test them to verify they're in working order, but I have faith that everything here is in tip-top shape. Nothing like some fried circuit or corroded corridor will stop this task from being completed as fast as mutantly possible.
Smirking at that little joke, I continue on my chore. Opening boxes, I verify the materials inside are in working or and correct our purposes, before handing them to Logan to work on as he finishes each previous task. Knowing it would be the most difficult part, I left the "brain" of Cerebro, it's computer system for the last. Focused on connecting the more delicate wires, my fatigue was long forgotten and I worked tirelessly into the morning with an equally devoted Wolverine.
Finally, we were done the restoring what the soldiers had stripped from the machine. With a pleased sigh at the completion, my aching body tells me I must rest before putting it to use. In my tired state, I would not have the control necessary to find Jean and I could harm other mutants if I try. Disappointment fills me at the delay, but I vow to myself that I will only take a few hours sleep.
"These words fall very short of expressing my gratitude, but I thank you for this, Logan. You have done an incredible job." I turn to face him.
At the thanks he nods absently, then hesitates, wanting to say something.
"Why you and not Scott?" I ask myself, speaking aloud the thought he was projecting to me.
I smile sadly and answer, "This is a very difficult time for you both, I know. You're each struggling. For Scott it is taking all of his energy not curl into a ball of misery and scream for his lost mate. Focusing on the mundane things like sleeping, rising, bathing, dressing, and teaching classes is a trial for him right now. There was no way I could add this to his burdens, especially if he gets his hopes up and I end up being wrong.
"It was an equally hard decision to come to you. I know the depth of your loss and do not wish to be insensitive to how you will feel if this turns out to be a fool's errand. You are stronger, though and I knew you would be able to do this without distraction, seeing it through no matter the outcome."
Again, he simply nods. There is another question in his eyes as he notes that I am facing the exit rather than moving to complete our mission.
"I fear I am too tired to attempt locating her right now. We have worked through the night and I tire very easily of late. Sleep is required first." I state, wheeling out of the chamber. "I will also need you rested for the day to come, if we are fortunate in our findings."
"When will we meet back here?" he demands.
"Noon, at the latest, I think. I shall have the others cover my classes and cancel anything they cannot. If I am not yet here by then, wake me immediately." I state as we enter the elevator to return to the main part of the mansion.
We part ways, as I head for my bedroom on the first floor and he continues on to his quarters on the third. Maneuvering into my bed after only removing my jacket and tie, I know I will be awake and rested again in less that the allotted time. Logan, with his regenerative abilities, will surely be chomping at the bit in no time and like him, I do not want to waste a moment.
~*~
Just three hours later, well before noon, we are again in Cerebro. Surprisingly, I had felt rested after just thirty minutes, but forced myself to take the extra time to build up some energy reserves for the day ahead.
Now, sitting before my creation, I wish I had taken even longer.
For the first time ever, I am nervous of this machine and it's power.
Damn Stryker for this, I think.
Had he not so manipulated me to bring about the horrible events of these past days, Jean would not be dead - or feared dead, as I now pray to be the case - and I would not fear the great power of Cerebro.
"I trust you." Logan says quietly from behind me.
I wonder if I perhaps projected my concerns to him, that he knew I needed such a reassurance. Smiling, I acknowledge that that my stiffness and hesitation would have communicated to him my unease.
Swallowing hard, I close the doors behind us, warn the already statue-still Logan not to move, and slowly lift the helmet onto my head.
Exhaling slowly, I begin testing the machine to be sure it works.
It locates Ororo covering my English class in the garden.
Scott is seen in the garage, going through the motions of teaching a shop class.
Venturing from those whose locations I had already known, I begin the harder tests.
Mystique has returned to her role of Senator Kelly in Washington, I am surprised to find.
Magneto, I cannot sense, but that does not surprise me.
Young John, I locate on an isolated island to the north. Something tells me Erik has taken his new recruit there to prepare for their next move against the humans.
Satisfied that the machine is working, I turn my attention to Alkali Lake. I find no signs of mutant life in the immediate vicinity of where we lost Jean, but refuse to be discouraged. Knowing the force of the water would have carried her away from that area, I expand my search.
There is nothing.
I am finding no signs of any life.
But.wait..
Yes, there.
There is a faint red glow, indicating a mutant life, off to the west of where I'd been scanning. Moving in that direction, the glow grows stronger, taking the shape of the mutant it belongs to.
It is not Jean.
It was a wolfen creature, most definitely not Jean.
Swallowing disappointment, I am about to refocus my search on the area I assume the current of the flowing water would have carried her, when something stops me. The mutant I'd found shifts its position and another very faint glow is revealed to me.
My God.
Logan stiffens behind me, indicating I had spoken those words aloud.
Quickly removing the helmet, I call urgently to Storm to prepare the Blackbird for immediate takeoff.
I finally turn to face an anxious Logan and the satisfied expression on my face answers the question running through the man's mind.
"She's alive." I say, simply because I had to hear the words aloud and make them real. "She's alive."
Two days and we all continue to grieve, but life must continue with the routines of before this tragedy. We all need more time, but the pressing demands of reality and the present do not allow for it.
I'm once again attempting to console the hardest hit by Jean's loss, Logan and Scott. They have changed greatly in these days. The man who loved her and was loved back and the loner who thought he had found in her a woman to share his life no longer felt the need to compete for dominance. They draw strength from one another, each knowing the other's pain as none of us can. Like all of us, accepting that this fate was Jean's choice is the hardest thing, but they are men who would give their lives to save the one's they love so they are coming to terms with it.
Our session today is drawn to an abrupt end by students arriving for their English Lit class. As the grieving pair leaves the room and the children settle in to learn, something whispers across my mind.
Something . familiar.
Something I never thought I would feel again.
Something . impossible?
There it is again, but it can't be. It's so faint, I must be imagining things. Wishful thinking, I think with a sad smile.
"Xavier" a third time. Still weak, but undeniable that time. Gazing out the window and looking at nothing, hope blossoms in my chest and spreads throughout my body.
"Jean" I reply this time, somehow knowing she is there and listening and needs to know I hear her.
I was correct, I sense peace now where there had been worry from her. Is she simply saying another good-bye or has a miracle occurred?
The students are restless from my preoccupation and one speaks up to stir me from my thoughts, asking, "Professor, is everything all right?"
Even if I am being an overly optimistic fool, as Erik has often accused, a smile touches my lips and I answer with complete conviction, "Yes, I think it will be."
I begin the class, but my mind is feverishly focused on another task. It is planning, calculating, and speculating possibilities. We must work quickly.
After 45 minutes the class is over and the students sent off with their assignments. I call for Logan to return to my office as we have some time before my group of students arrive.
"You rang?" he asks, with some of his former fire, when he arrives.
"Thank you for coming so quickly, Logan. I have a matter of great importance that I need you assistance on immediately." I state gathering up the notes and instructions I'd made during class.
"Now isn't a very good time, Chuck."
"I know. It is difficult for us all, but as I said it is a matter of great importance and we must begin work today. I fear any more time wasted will lead to greater sorrow for us all." Wheeling over to my desk, I open a draw and pull out a credit card and two keyrings. "We must rebuild Cerebro. I have here a list of materials I need you to gather. You'll find the credit limit on this card to be no issue, take it and buy everything you can today. The items listed should be easy to locate, but you may have to visit a few places to get all we need.
"This key is to a storage facility about 30 miles from here, instructions to get there are among those papers. Inside the space I've rented you'll find the most important and irreplaceable pieces to the machine, handle everything with great care. These keys are to the Jeep Cherokee in the garage, it should have enough room for most of the supplies, have anything that doesn't fit delivered here."
He looks everything I've just shoved into his hands, then at me. "Whoa. All this has happened because of Cerebro and you want to rebuild the thing? I vote for destroying it, bub."
"I understand how you feel, Logan, but the events that led you to form that opinion will not be repeated. Cerebro is essential to us in finding and protecting fellow mutants. It is for that reason we must get it fixed and fixed fast. I sense a mutant in danger."
Logan is by no means stupid and he quickly puts the pieces of this puzzle I'm presenting him together. His head snaps up and he nearly growls, "Jean?!"
"Please do not get your hopes up, Logan. This is a difficult time for us all and my powers my simply me grasping at straws, unable to accept the reality of her death."
"But you've sensed her?" he demands.
Sighing, I nod and turn to look out the window toward the west.
"Alive?" he practically whispers the word from behind me.
"I do not know. That is why I must get Cerebro working again. I need you on this, Logan, and I need you not to tell anyone of what we're doing." I turn to make sure he understands the sensitivity of this project.
Without another word, he nods and leaves the room. Confident that my instructions will be carried out swiftly, I go to meet my next class.
~*~
Even knowing Logan's commitment to this project, I was very surprised when he came to me that night to tell me all the materials had been collected. Someday when I have more time, I will have to ask him how on earth he managed that feat. Time is of the essence now, though, and we've much work to do.
Fighting the fatigue that has haunted me since my ordeal in Cerebro 2, I move with Logan down to my Cerebro. Stacked outside it's doors are numerous boxes and sheets of various metals.
"Where are the items from storage?" I ask.
He leads me to a pile of boxes set somewhat apart from the others and grunts indicating these are what I need.
"Good. I'll check these to make sure they are still in working order. I would like you to begin assembling everything the second I've checked it. I took the time you were shopping to make some diagrams to assist you." Handing him said drawings, I open the first box.
Ah, my helmet. It seems to be in fine condition, but I will not know until it is completely hooked up. In the next three boxes I find the outer casing for the computer. This part was easy, so I hand it over to Logan to put together, asking the front panel be left off so the actual computer can be more easily placed inside. Without hesitation he gathers a blowtorch and some other tools and enters the chamber to get to work.
The next four boxes contain the more specialized computer chips and conductors. I'll have to test them to verify they're in working order, but I have faith that everything here is in tip-top shape. Nothing like some fried circuit or corroded corridor will stop this task from being completed as fast as mutantly possible.
Smirking at that little joke, I continue on my chore. Opening boxes, I verify the materials inside are in working or and correct our purposes, before handing them to Logan to work on as he finishes each previous task. Knowing it would be the most difficult part, I left the "brain" of Cerebro, it's computer system for the last. Focused on connecting the more delicate wires, my fatigue was long forgotten and I worked tirelessly into the morning with an equally devoted Wolverine.
Finally, we were done the restoring what the soldiers had stripped from the machine. With a pleased sigh at the completion, my aching body tells me I must rest before putting it to use. In my tired state, I would not have the control necessary to find Jean and I could harm other mutants if I try. Disappointment fills me at the delay, but I vow to myself that I will only take a few hours sleep.
"These words fall very short of expressing my gratitude, but I thank you for this, Logan. You have done an incredible job." I turn to face him.
At the thanks he nods absently, then hesitates, wanting to say something.
"Why you and not Scott?" I ask myself, speaking aloud the thought he was projecting to me.
I smile sadly and answer, "This is a very difficult time for you both, I know. You're each struggling. For Scott it is taking all of his energy not curl into a ball of misery and scream for his lost mate. Focusing on the mundane things like sleeping, rising, bathing, dressing, and teaching classes is a trial for him right now. There was no way I could add this to his burdens, especially if he gets his hopes up and I end up being wrong.
"It was an equally hard decision to come to you. I know the depth of your loss and do not wish to be insensitive to how you will feel if this turns out to be a fool's errand. You are stronger, though and I knew you would be able to do this without distraction, seeing it through no matter the outcome."
Again, he simply nods. There is another question in his eyes as he notes that I am facing the exit rather than moving to complete our mission.
"I fear I am too tired to attempt locating her right now. We have worked through the night and I tire very easily of late. Sleep is required first." I state, wheeling out of the chamber. "I will also need you rested for the day to come, if we are fortunate in our findings."
"When will we meet back here?" he demands.
"Noon, at the latest, I think. I shall have the others cover my classes and cancel anything they cannot. If I am not yet here by then, wake me immediately." I state as we enter the elevator to return to the main part of the mansion.
We part ways, as I head for my bedroom on the first floor and he continues on to his quarters on the third. Maneuvering into my bed after only removing my jacket and tie, I know I will be awake and rested again in less that the allotted time. Logan, with his regenerative abilities, will surely be chomping at the bit in no time and like him, I do not want to waste a moment.
~*~
Just three hours later, well before noon, we are again in Cerebro. Surprisingly, I had felt rested after just thirty minutes, but forced myself to take the extra time to build up some energy reserves for the day ahead.
Now, sitting before my creation, I wish I had taken even longer.
For the first time ever, I am nervous of this machine and it's power.
Damn Stryker for this, I think.
Had he not so manipulated me to bring about the horrible events of these past days, Jean would not be dead - or feared dead, as I now pray to be the case - and I would not fear the great power of Cerebro.
"I trust you." Logan says quietly from behind me.
I wonder if I perhaps projected my concerns to him, that he knew I needed such a reassurance. Smiling, I acknowledge that that my stiffness and hesitation would have communicated to him my unease.
Swallowing hard, I close the doors behind us, warn the already statue-still Logan not to move, and slowly lift the helmet onto my head.
Exhaling slowly, I begin testing the machine to be sure it works.
It locates Ororo covering my English class in the garden.
Scott is seen in the garage, going through the motions of teaching a shop class.
Venturing from those whose locations I had already known, I begin the harder tests.
Mystique has returned to her role of Senator Kelly in Washington, I am surprised to find.
Magneto, I cannot sense, but that does not surprise me.
Young John, I locate on an isolated island to the north. Something tells me Erik has taken his new recruit there to prepare for their next move against the humans.
Satisfied that the machine is working, I turn my attention to Alkali Lake. I find no signs of mutant life in the immediate vicinity of where we lost Jean, but refuse to be discouraged. Knowing the force of the water would have carried her away from that area, I expand my search.
There is nothing.
I am finding no signs of any life.
But.wait..
Yes, there.
There is a faint red glow, indicating a mutant life, off to the west of where I'd been scanning. Moving in that direction, the glow grows stronger, taking the shape of the mutant it belongs to.
It is not Jean.
It was a wolfen creature, most definitely not Jean.
Swallowing disappointment, I am about to refocus my search on the area I assume the current of the flowing water would have carried her, when something stops me. The mutant I'd found shifts its position and another very faint glow is revealed to me.
My God.
Logan stiffens behind me, indicating I had spoken those words aloud.
Quickly removing the helmet, I call urgently to Storm to prepare the Blackbird for immediate takeoff.
I finally turn to face an anxious Logan and the satisfied expression on my face answers the question running through the man's mind.
"She's alive." I say, simply because I had to hear the words aloud and make them real. "She's alive."