PLOT: The Cullen boy haven't been paying that much attention to their wives lately. And the women are getting impatient. So they take action-make the boys jealous with other boys, and they guys will turn around. Right?

Sigh. Fail.

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Song of the Day: See the Sun by the Kooks

Esme POV

"Carlisle. Carlisle? Hello?" I tapped on Carlisle's office door, leaning against the doorframe. My handsome husband sat at his desk, his blonde hair slightly ruffled—an abnormality, for vampires, I've come to realize—and his tie loosened around his neck. Papers were neatly stacked in piles around the room, and the quiet steady rhythm of a pen scribbling against paper filled the room. Light started to stream into the room, the start of yet another morning of an eternity.

"Carlisle." I tried again, trying to smother the flame of impatience I held against my husband. Finally, he looked up, shadows under his eyes darker than I've seen them in a long time. The move to Chicago was a drastic change from Seattle, and before that, Forks. To be fair, we hadn't the time to hunt.

"Yes, darling?" He said, almost tiredly. As if we could get tired. I suppressed the urge to sigh, because my handsome darling husband had seem to have forgotten that today was the day we were supposed to go out and find new curtains for the living room. With him at the hospital all the time, it's hard to corner him into doing things.

You'd think having a vampire husband would be different. We don't have to eat. We don't have to sleep. The sex is great, we're wealthy, I've six beautiful children, a wonderful granddaughter and her beloved. Whenever I go to the store to buy food for Renesmee and to keep up appearances, I get plagued by women, who come up to me as I stand there in the frozen food aisle, and say "What a perfect husband you have," and "It must be easy being the wife of such a wonderful man."

Now, I'm not ungrateful. Carlisle is, with every sense of the word, my soulmate and damn near perfect. I would not trade him for the world, and I love him more than I ever thought I could love.

But he is a man, my dear women. And vampire or not, it does not morph him into a super perfect supreme being. He can be sloppy still, he leaves the door unlocked at times, and ask him how to save a human after they've been attacked by a vampire and he can walk you through all of the steps one by one—yet he fails to remember at times simple tasks like how we should be picking out curtains by now.

"Yes?" Carlisle repeats. I gave him a look, realizing that I'd been silently musing for a bit, and placed a hand on my hip.

"Must I remind you that we are to pick the curtains out today, Carlisle." I smoothly said, coming into the room and approaching his oak desk, still holding up after all of the many moves we'd gone through... and other activities. Carlisle pursed his lips and exhaled heavily, avoiding eye contact as he leaned back in his chair.

"I've a shift at the hospital tonight, dear. A meeting, before that as well. Can we not pick out curtains another day?" I stared into his golden eyes, the eyes that years ago would stop my heart just by glancing at me. Until they became the eyes that actually did stop my heart—literally.

"Carlisle Cullen, you are doing it again." I said, taking papers and straightening them.

"What do you mean? Doing what?"

"I mean, you're putting your work before what needs to be done again. This is the second time you have said for this to wait when I told you that I have to redecorate the Joneses house this month and I won't have free time for a while."

"Yes, dear, but do we really need curtains? Is it necessary that I come to this particular activity?" The look I gave him in reply must have made him try for a new approach in replying, because he hastily added, "I agree with you completely. I apologize. But we're almost at a break through here-a cure for cancer, Esme!"

His unfocused eyes glistened as they pleaded with me for a reprieve, and I sighed in defeat, knowing I couldn't say no to that. Was it possible for someone to be too caring, "perfect", dedicated?

"I understand, Carlisle." And with those words that I knew would be all the motivation he needed to finish working, I turned on my heel to leave the room.

"Uh, Esme?" He asked after a moment, and a strange feeling of hope arose within me. I paused at the familiar spot in the doorway, raising an eyebrow.

"Yes?"

"Where are the kids? They were telling me how they all planned to get jobs this year."

I tried not to let the waves of shock and irritation tone my answer. "Jasper's been working on psychology lately. Alice will work at some mall store, Edward has taken a job at Piano & Co., right next to the book shop that Bella will work at soon. Emmett's been at the new Hunting and Camping store, and Rosalie hasn't decided yet. Renesmee has taken up painting, and Jacob has been on patrol lately."

Carlisle nodded for a second, eyes distant, and I turned to leave again.

"Esme?"

"What, Carlisle?" I snapped, no longer bothering to lighten my mood. Ignoring this, Carlisle was turned towards his desk once again, scanning documents as he said "Nothing important, dearest, it's just that there's an ink stain on the hem of the side of your blouse."

Sure enough, a blue spot beneath my arm tainted my pristine tailored shirt. Biting the inside of my cheek, I firmly shut the door behind me.

"So glad you noticed, dearest." I muttered, as I stomped away.

Rosalie POV

"I mean, they've got this cool shooting range that has lasers. I thought about getting one for the house just to practice with-"

I bit my lip and resisted the urge to scream. "Emmett, pass me the wrench please." Since I couldn't get out from under the car myself, I had made Emmett come to the garage with me and give me the parts and tools like we used to.

Which proved to be the biggest mistake I've made in a while, ever since he took that job at the hunting and camping store here in Chicago. We'd all made the decision to get summer jobs, and now school was about to start and Emmett was fully intent on killing me slowly in useless ramblings about his new occupation.

Emmett either ignored what I was saying, or didn't hear me over the constant babbling he was doing. He sat on the table I kept my tools, and talked.

"I also was thinking about getting one of those tents, to camp outside. We haven't done that in a while. Of course, I'd have to see what the best offer was at the store, which would mean spending even more time."

"That's great honey. Hand me the wrench."

"I can do more time though. I mean it's really, really cool Rose. I wish we had one of those when I was younger, but all we had was—"

"Ned Stan's Bait Shop," I finished for him, "I know, Emmett. Hand. Me. The. Wrench." Emmett looked at me, and tossed me the tool. It bounced twice and slid under the car next to me and near my ankles.

Dammit.

"So help me God if I get a hold of that wrench Emmett, it's going straight for your head."

He'd thrown the wrench without direction, nor a care. I know that, because if he wanted to, he could have thrown it at an angle and have had it slide in next to me.

"Sorry Rosie." I slightly melted at the nickname he still called me. Proof that he cared for something other than the temporary job he had and stupid human things. And then I heard a beep, and him check his messages, and my mood instantly died. "Oh. It's almost my shift. Have to be getting to work." In a last attempt to capture his attention, I slid out from under the car, intent on using seduction methods if necessary to get him to show something towards me, anything, other than fleeting interest.

I wore my ratty daisy dukes, courtesy of my last shopping trip. I was in a white tight t-shirt, one that hugged every curve and didn't quite cover my midriff. I was slightly dirty and my hair was slipping out of its bun. I was sexy, and I knew it.

He kissed my cheek and jogged out of the garage. I stood there, stunned, as I heard his jeep door open and close, and him pull out of the driveway and away to work.

I don't think I've ever felt this much emotional turmoil in my life.

BELLA'S POV

"Edward, what's this about you working from 4 to 10 Monday through Saturday? We don't get out from school until 3:30 anyways!" I walked up behind my husband as he ran his fingers through his hair and organized his music. I loved our new bedroom, despite my humble nature preferring the coziness of smaller spaces that couldn't fit grand pianos in them. It made for soothing romantic nights- or it would, I corrected myself. Romance, as well as my husband, had made itself sparse in my life these past few months.

"Bella, this is something I'm really interested in. I haven't had a job that I've wanted in such a long time…" He intensely stared at me, a trick that after 12 years of marriage I knew meant 'I'm-trying-to-sucker-you-into-saying-yes.'

And it wasn't going to work. I trained my eyes on his level ones, and narrowed them.

"And when are we supposed to see each other if you're spending all of your time in a music store and we have no classes except for lunch?" I crossed my arms in defiance.

"All the time in between! Love, it's not like we sleep." He said, as if I hadn't thought of that already. To keep my temper back, I leaned against the vintage bookcase I'd ordered online two years ago, one of my few favorite possessions for its rugged look at character. Edward, unsurprisingly, hated it, and had begged me to order a much nicer, modern one.

"I know that, but how is Renesmee going to see you?" I asked, no longer afraid of pulling out the trusty guilt card.

He paused, pen rested for a moment. "She can visit me at work. Human dads work all the time, with hours worse than I. Bella, I need you to understand…"

It appears the guilt card no longer deserved its "trusty" title. "I get it, I get it. No need to get all slow on me." I grumbled, watching him press notes on his piano. Light steadily streamed inside the window, and I knew Jacob would be coming back with Renesmee. She and Claire had been spending a lot of time together, and I trusted Jake to keep an eye on her while she went.

"Well, when do you start at the bookstore?" Edward asked after noticing my frustration, getting up to kiss my forehead. He just as quickly turned around to finish packing music up. I rolled my eyes as he began quickly pressing keys.

"Tomorrow, actually. After school, until 7. Jake will pick Renesmee up and drive her home, and Esme will be here for a while until she has to-"

"Bella, shhh. Listen to this. Do you like this piece better than this?" He played two different snippets on the piano, paused, and as I was about to say which one I preferred, nodded and circled the one he wanted. When did my opinion suddenly not matter?

"Edward, do what you want." I sighed, and left the room.

Alice's POV

"Alice, we were just in here." Jasper complained again, as we walked into another department store. I shook my head in dismay. You'd think after going on countless sprees with me, he'd know the difference between a Calvin Klein and a Nike store. I guess not.

"I'm going to be late for my Psych Class!" Jasper had a habit, normally endearing, of huffing out air like a small child. It was only endearing when it wasn't directed at me. I reminded myself that he looked quite handsome in his blue button down shirt I chose for him, and turned back towards my much more adored work.

"Jasper, honey, you won't." I said, reaching for a shirt that would look cute for my 21st day of school. Some people like to buy a few shirts and wear the same thing all year. Last year, Hannah Staker wore her white owl shirt 16 times. I know, because it was absolutely atrocious and I'd counted.

And how I despised Hannah Staker. I had no reason to, not really, but with the way she looks at Jasper and her sweet little southern-belle accent… it just gets to me sometimes. I wanted to tell her last year that her hunky-dory cowgirl boots were ugly as hell times seven, and that I could smell the cheap leather on them a mile away. That, and they clearly did not go with those light blue jeans that she always wore with them.

"Alice, we won't be late if we leave now." Jasper mumbled. I looked up at him and made a face. Little did he know, I was intentionally drawing out this shopping process to spend a little more time with him. Despite the fact that he'd been really into his Psychology class lately, and completely avoiding me. It was common knowledge to me that in the Cullen household, there was a large problem of spouse avoidance going on, and it was unfortunate that it had struck my husband as well.

"Jasper, don't you want to spend some quality time together?" I said, widening my eyes and cocking my head in a way I knew drove him mad. Let it be said that my reserved husband had quite a few kinks, more so than any other in the Cullen residence, and I was not afraid to use them against him- even in public.

He huffed again and looked away. "Of course I do, Alice. But I also don't want to be late. So let's get what you need and head for the hills."

Huh. Maybe I'm losing my puppy-eyes touch.

"Okay, Jazz. Whatever makes you happy." I quickly bought the shirt and a few other garments for my sweet niece and slowly left the mall. Jasper muttered impatiently as I as slow as vampire possible trudged to the car. He opened my door and shut it, and I winced at the force he used on my precious Porsche.

"Jasper, calm down. We'll be there in three minutes. I'm psychic, remember?" I said. This comforted him some—imagine that, the psychic also being the calmer, a backwards situation in our dynamic. I confidently pulled out to take him to class, then my smile faded.

A snippet of a vision appeared to me, and I hadn't been able to get this vision fast enough. Traffic jam. Bad one. Jasper's leg was anxiously going up and down, and I eyed the clock saying that I had ten minutes to get him to his designation in a soon-to-be ten minute worth traffic jam. With a small sense of dread, I approached the long line of cars in front of me, all halted in progress, and resisted the urge to turn up the music at the overwhelming silence.

"Psychic, huh?" He finally snapped out, his southern drawl that usually was like honey and milk sounding like a whip.

"Jasper Whitlock, you watch your mouth." I said, tight lipped. He managed to look slightly shame-faced. If this was how he was going to react, he could walk to class. I didn't mean to say that aloud, but I did. Face of stone, he unlocked the door and grabbed his backpack to get out. I was awarded with a glimpse of his face as he opened the door, and tried to convince him to come back inside.

That was his determined look.

He was going to walk to class. "Jasper Whitlock Cullen, you better get back into this car!" I called, wishing traffic would suddenly disappear so I could prove him wrong and drive past his stubborn ass. I must have been extra good lately, because he turned to get back into the car as traffic suddenly moved, and he went so fast we were there in 4 minutes and 21 seconds. He opened the door to the driver's side for me, closed it, said goodbye and hurried to class.

He was early.

I'm sure he could feel my anger. I wanted him to. As soon as I got home, I purposely walked into the living room and knew what I was going to find. A group of disgruntled women lounging on couches, and one sleeping girl in her mother's lap. Dropping my bags onto the floor, they stopped talking and turned to get another scoop of 'I-Can't-Believe-Him' ice cream.

"Can you believe him?" I asked in outrage, after telling Esme, Rose and Bella everything. Taking their cues, they nodded in solidarity and in agreement of the cruelty of it all. What was wrong with our men these days? Was it because we've been married for so long?

Renesmee sleepily opened one eye and started talking. "I read this magazine that said something about how men get interested into hobbies when they find life boring or something."

We all went silent as we thought about this. Were we boring? We were vampires, for God's sake! How more interesting can it get?

"What the hell do they want? We glitter, dammit!" Rosalie seethed.

"I bet Hannah is even more boring than me." I muttered. Bella raised an eyebrow and I saw her resist the urge to smile.

"Are you still jealous over her, Al'?" Bella teased, grinning. I stared at her open mouthed from my place on the couch and scoffed.

"Jealous? For what? Jasper won't leave me for her. If anything, he needs to be worried about me leaving him." I was only half-kidding. I wouldn't ever leave him, but I was maybe slightly jealous over Hannah. She was his type… all southern, all cutesy-daisy.

"We should make them jealous. See how they like that." Rose agreed. Esme shook her head in disagreement, but it was hesitant.

"I'm in." Bella said, picking up a the book beside her. "How are we doing this?"

"With male attention, of course. Pick a few humans, act like we're somewhat interested, it'll wake the guys up alright. Let them see what they're missing." Rose replied, twirling her hair.

"Could work." Esme gave in, which was when I knew that we were in some alternate universe. When Mama Esme agrees to diabolical female group plans, something is off.

"At least we have school." Nessie sleepily added. Bingo.

And it was then and there that the Cullen women decided on a Wednesday summer afternoon to make their spouses jealous. After all, they were grown men. They could be responsible, and realize the errors of their ways and give the girls attention. Deep down, we knew that frustrated women made a much stronger combatant than bored men, and that we needed a little fun too. I tried to see the outcome of everything, but the future was quiet for once.

Well, won't this be fun, I thought with mirth.

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