Title: Slushies and Defensive Maneuvers
Summary: Everyone knew Rachel Berry could sing …and dance…and…make you want to light yourself on fire with her annoying and overbearing personality. What no one knew, especially Puck, was that Rachel Berry had traded in her ballet shoes for a black belt in Judo! Slightly A/U.
Puck's POV:
Looking back on it, Puck saw no reason that this particular Thursday should have been any different than the ones preceding it. The day had started just like all the others. He woke up to hear his mother screaming at him not to be late for school. His little sister called him a loser and then went back to her cereal and tween magazine (one with that Twilight douche Edward on the cover.) He hopped in his vintage (no it was not a POS) truck and drove straight to the 7/11.
This was his favorite part. Picking the right flavor for the day. He had tons of flavors to choose from. There were the classics: cherry, lime, grape and coke. Then there were the seasonal and limited edition flavors: white cherry, blueberry tango, watermelon scream, and countless others. Today, he was feeling kind of classic. Grape. And in the spirit of going classic, he decided to change his normal Thursday victim, Kurt (had to keep the losers on their toes and shake up the routine.) But who should be his target instead? Hmm, grape slushie…? An evil smile spread across his face as he decided exactly who the lucky facial victim of the day would be. And perhaps that is exactly when he should have realized that this day would not go as planned.
Rachel's POV:
After her invigorating work out on the elliptical, she took a relaxing shower and then stood in front of her dressing room style vanity prepared for her daily mantra of positive self-awareness. "I am a STAR. I will succeed in all that I do. I will be on Broadway. I will win my first Tony by the age of 25. And I will be gracious in my forgiveness of all the Lima losers who do not see my innate stardom." Feeling that a positive mindset had been established for the day, Rachel then dressed with special care.
Today, Mr. Schue was going to hold auditions for the solo that would be performed at Sectionals. Rachel wanted to impress, from the inside out, that she was the only logical choice. Her teammates, though abounding in raw talent, did not possess her level of training in both voice and stage presence. So she took her new outfit from her closet, a stunningly tasteful green tunic dress and black leggings. She paired the outfit with her new silver gladiator sandals. No, she would not have to endure any of Kurt's snide remarks regarding her taste in apparel today. Luckily, the auditions had been decided for a Thursday. Thursday was her guaranteed day of respite from Noah Puckerman and his nasty slushie ritual. She was flying high with this knowledge, and after accessorizing with some lovely silver dangly earrings and necklace, she grabbed her homemade breakfast and lunch to head to school.
Puck's POV:
After grabbing what he needed for his first class from his locker, Puck made his normal hallway rounds. He fist-bumped his fellow jocks (who high fives anymore?) and flirted with a couple of Cheerios. Then he set up across and slightly down the hall from his target's locker to wait, slushie in hand. This was going to be epic!
Rachel's POV:
She merrily skipped to her locker, mentally listing the items she would need for her first two classes. She was oblivious to the mohawked boy, who had in his hands the ticket to her impending misery. Today was going to be monumental to her Glee career!
Puck's POV:
While his target dug around in her locker, he stealthily made his way to stand five feet behind her. Distance was key to a superior slushie facial. If you were too close, you only got the face. If you were too far, you got the feet. He held his slushie bearing arm at a perfect tossing angle, his breath held in anticipation of the look of utter mortification that she would give him. She turned and his arm flung out in perfect synchronization.
Rachel's POV:
She turned from her locker and time seemed to slow to a near stand still. She had caught, in her peripheral vision, the image of a purple blob escaping a mega-gulp sized plastic cup. Attached to the cup was an arm covered in the signature red letterman's jacket that all McKinley High jocks wore. She didn't even think about her movements as her body took over for her mind.
A year ago, she had hung up her ballet shoes in favor of a new form of expression through movement…Judo. As should be expected of a star of her caliber, she quickly rose up the ranks of learning and skill to a black belt. Though she abhorred violence, she found grace and beauty in the martial arts. And as she had never actually planned to use her new skills on anyone, she was possibly more stunned than Puck when she dropped to the floor in a lightening quick defensive stance and then spun her leg in a perfect sweep under his feet.
Puck's POV:
He landed on his butt with his chiseled good looks locked into an expression of pure shock. Rachel Berry had just ninja-ed him. He could not believe it. And what was worse, the crowded hallway was laughing…at him. He looked at her, as she was still crouched on the floor, and stared directly into her not-slushie-filled eyes, and felt something completely unexpected. He felt aroused. He did a fast and furious mental ass-kicking for even thinking such things about Rachel-freaking-Berry. But then his mind did a quick replay of the last 60 seconds and he decided, despite the cackling still going on around him, that Rachel Berry was a badass.
~END~