Buddy: *sniff* I can't believe he's dead! Waaaaa!
Jubei: I know! I miss him too!
Buddy: Who am I going to talk to about your lack of sanity?
*A/N Buddy is refurring to my pet rat, Tak and his lack of livingness.
Jubei: I don't know! Well, I'm going to write a really weird fic now!
Buddy: Just when I thought it couldn't get worse, you start typing.
Dedicated to the memory of Tak. We'll miss you, little squeaky guy.
*A/N this story is set in Hi-Skool, much like most of my other fanfics!
Jubei: I am letting Zim say something here. He wanted to prove that there is more to him than just the surface Zim. Turns out, there isn't.
Zim: Have you ever confused a dream with life? Or stolen something when you had the cash? Have ever been blue? Or thought you're still moving while sitting still? Maybe I was just carzy. Maybe it was the 60's, or maybe I was just an alien, interupted.
Jubei: ...Riiiiiiiiiiight! Well, that was, disturbing!
Slumped on the couch, huddled under a blanket, Zim stared blankly at the tv. On the other side of the room, Gir hopped back and forth, trying to catch his remote control mouse-shaped cat toy. Being the defective peice of space junk that he is, he soon lost intrest in the toy mouse and turned his attention to Zim.
Screaming like a howler monkey, Gir took a swan dive directly into Zim's lap. The Irken invader didn't seem to notice. Just then, the front door swung open, revealing Dib, aiming a squirt gun at Zim's head.
"HA, I've got you now, Zim!" he screamed, pulling a camera out of a hidden pocket in his trenchcoat. You're in for it now, Zim! I'm gonna..." he trailed off when he noticed Zim hadn't even acknowledged his presence.
"Um, this isn't nearly as much fun when you don't react!" Dib yelled, frusterated.
Zim sat, blindly punching buttons on the tv remote until Dib snatched it away from him.
"Don't you even care I'm about to take pictures of you without your disguise? Look, look! I'm going down to your lab!" he taunted, walking toward the kitchen, looking over his shoulder to see if Zim was watching.
He wasn't.
Dib started to realize that he wasn't going to get a reaction from Zim and walked back to the couch.
"Is this some kind of alien trick? Because if it is...it's really freaking me out! I mean, usually by now you're screaming like a maniac and calling me things like 'human worm boy' and what not, so what's with that, huh?"
Zim slowly looked up from the tv and stared at Dib with half open eyes.
"Huh? Oh...it's you. Can you not see that I am not in the mood to deal with you right now. So, just leave." he sighed.
"Oh, okay, Zim. I'll just leave...right after I take your picture! Say cheese!" Dib laughed as he snapped the camera.
"Success! I finally have photographic evidence!! Mysterious Mysteries, here I come!!"
Zim rolled his eyes. For some reason, he didn't care.
He thought to himself, "This human has prove of my non-human-ness, so why aren't I doing something about it?"
Before Dib could yell at Zim for not responding, Gaz appeared in the doorway.
"Dib, it's dinnertime, stop playing with Zim and come home!" she growled.
"Gaz, I think something is wrong with Zim."
Gaz walked up to the couch and studied Zim.
"Aw, leave him alone, can't you see he's depressed? Probably from you bugging him so damn much. I can relate."
*A/N I must take a slight break for to hook up my VCR to my mini-tv next to my computer so I can watch Girl, Interuppted. Please hold..................Okay, I'm done, on with the story!
Dib scoffed, "Pa-lease. I think he may be homesick or something!
Gaz glared at Dib for teasing Zim.
"Aww, is that it, Zim? Do you miss your home? Aww, well, too bad!! You're on earth now buddy boy! So get over it!"
Gaz growled and smacked Dib in the head for being so insensitive.
"Zim, is that why you've been moping around all week? Are you homesick?"
Ever since the7th grade, Gaz had started being nice to Zim. She hated to admit it, but she had developed a crush on him.
Zim just rolled over to face the back of the couch. He didn't want to talk to a human.
Dib giggled, "Maybe he misses someone ON his home planet!"
Zim hunched his shoulders as if a chill had gone down his spine.
Dib smiled evilly, "Oh, that's it, is it?"
Still, Zim didn't speak.
"Come on Zim, tell me what's wrong. You need to talk, it'll make you feel better."
Zim rolled over to face Dib and Gaz. "I am perfectly fine!" he shouted.
"Zim, four days ago, you chased a bottle of asprin with a bottle of vodka!" Gaz yelled.
"I had a headache." Zim mumbled.
Dib laughed at the thought of Zim ending his own life, concidering it would save him the trouble.
"That's it, all the humans in the room need to get out. NOW!" Zim shouted as he jumped off the couch and shoved Dib and Gaz toward the door, slamming it behind them. He locked it and fell back on its wooden surface. He sighed.
"I guess I have been moping around alot lately." Gir, who was sitting on the landing of the stairs, growled. He was still mad about Zim trying to kill himself. Zim looked up at him.
He sighed. "I'm sorry for trying to end my existance, Gir."
Gir still frowned at him.
"...and I promise I'll never do it again. Forgive me?"
Gir smiled and ran over to hug Zim.
He giggled as he wrapped his metallic arms around his waist. "I would be sad without you, master! Who would yell at me?"
Zim laughed. "Alright then. Back to my filthy evil I guess..." he sighed as he headed toward his lab to work.
*Not to sound like a JTHM comic or anything, but...MEANWHILE on Irk*
"Kill him?! But why?! Zim has always been so loyal to you! Why would you kill him?" Tak shouted after overhearing the Tallest's disscusion.
"Well, frankly, he's a total disgrace to the Irken race." Purple calmly stated.
Red nodded. "If you're not part of the solution, you'e part of the problem."
Tak, the young Irken female tried to think of any excuse to give the Tallest to make them change their minds.
"We have to give him credit though. If it weren't for his incredible annoyence, we would have never known about earth or its abundance of resources." Red smiled.
"Look Tak, Zim is expendible. We need those resources and if we leave it up to him, we'll never get them."
"Purple is right. If you want something conquered, you have to conquer it yourself."
Tak thought to herself. "I've got to warm him." She took off running down the dark corridor.
"Invader Tak, where are you going?" Purple called after her.
"Oh, uh, just to Food Cortia for some fries, eh heh heh."
*Okay, back to earth...*
"Gir, bring me the...uh...the...thingy."
Gir looked around franticly. "I...I can't find it!!" he screamed.
Zim frowned. "*sigh* Nevermind. I can't concentrate on work right now. I'm going up for a walk. Stay here and uh, do...something."
Gir squealed. "Gaurd the base?"
Zim nodded. "yeah, that."
Gir's eyes glowed a crimson red as he saluted Zim. "Yes my master! I obey!"
Zim sighed as the elevator took him up to the house. When it finally stopped, he stepped out of the toilet only to hear a crash of metal in the front yard. Zim ran to the door, cracked it open and peered out. A twisted pile of of metal resembling a voot crusier lay in ruins in the yard. Zim shrieked in horror.
"Somebody stole the cruiser!" He stopped and thought. Wait, the cruiser's in the repair bay, no one could have gotten to it without my knowledge. What's going on here?"
Zim cocked an eyebrow and studied the cruiser until the cockpit window flipped open. Some clanking noices came from inside the cockpit along with a few Irken curse words. Then, out stepped another Irken, slightly taller than Zim. She wore a blue invader's uniform that matched the color of her eyes perfectly. She stepped out from the pile of metal that once was a cruiser and dusted herself off. Zim couldn't believe his eyes. He blinked and opened the door wider.
"Tak." He whispered.
Tak turned toward the house and saw Zim. "Oh my Tallest! Do you know how long I have been flying around looking for this damn planet? Hmm? Six months!"
Zim laughed a little. "Navigation was never your strong suit. Or piloting from the looks of your crusier."
She smiled and ran over to Zim. "I can't believe it's you! I've missed you so much!"
Zim smiled and embraced her in a hug. "I've missed you too! But, why? Why are you here?"
Tak's smile faded. "We need to talk."
Jubei: I know! I miss him too!
Buddy: Who am I going to talk to about your lack of sanity?
*A/N Buddy is refurring to my pet rat, Tak and his lack of livingness.
Jubei: I don't know! Well, I'm going to write a really weird fic now!
Buddy: Just when I thought it couldn't get worse, you start typing.
Dedicated to the memory of Tak. We'll miss you, little squeaky guy.
*A/N this story is set in Hi-Skool, much like most of my other fanfics!
Jubei: I am letting Zim say something here. He wanted to prove that there is more to him than just the surface Zim. Turns out, there isn't.
Zim: Have you ever confused a dream with life? Or stolen something when you had the cash? Have ever been blue? Or thought you're still moving while sitting still? Maybe I was just carzy. Maybe it was the 60's, or maybe I was just an alien, interupted.
Jubei: ...Riiiiiiiiiiight! Well, that was, disturbing!
Slumped on the couch, huddled under a blanket, Zim stared blankly at the tv. On the other side of the room, Gir hopped back and forth, trying to catch his remote control mouse-shaped cat toy. Being the defective peice of space junk that he is, he soon lost intrest in the toy mouse and turned his attention to Zim.
Screaming like a howler monkey, Gir took a swan dive directly into Zim's lap. The Irken invader didn't seem to notice. Just then, the front door swung open, revealing Dib, aiming a squirt gun at Zim's head.
"HA, I've got you now, Zim!" he screamed, pulling a camera out of a hidden pocket in his trenchcoat. You're in for it now, Zim! I'm gonna..." he trailed off when he noticed Zim hadn't even acknowledged his presence.
"Um, this isn't nearly as much fun when you don't react!" Dib yelled, frusterated.
Zim sat, blindly punching buttons on the tv remote until Dib snatched it away from him.
"Don't you even care I'm about to take pictures of you without your disguise? Look, look! I'm going down to your lab!" he taunted, walking toward the kitchen, looking over his shoulder to see if Zim was watching.
He wasn't.
Dib started to realize that he wasn't going to get a reaction from Zim and walked back to the couch.
"Is this some kind of alien trick? Because if it is...it's really freaking me out! I mean, usually by now you're screaming like a maniac and calling me things like 'human worm boy' and what not, so what's with that, huh?"
Zim slowly looked up from the tv and stared at Dib with half open eyes.
"Huh? Oh...it's you. Can you not see that I am not in the mood to deal with you right now. So, just leave." he sighed.
"Oh, okay, Zim. I'll just leave...right after I take your picture! Say cheese!" Dib laughed as he snapped the camera.
"Success! I finally have photographic evidence!! Mysterious Mysteries, here I come!!"
Zim rolled his eyes. For some reason, he didn't care.
He thought to himself, "This human has prove of my non-human-ness, so why aren't I doing something about it?"
Before Dib could yell at Zim for not responding, Gaz appeared in the doorway.
"Dib, it's dinnertime, stop playing with Zim and come home!" she growled.
"Gaz, I think something is wrong with Zim."
Gaz walked up to the couch and studied Zim.
"Aw, leave him alone, can't you see he's depressed? Probably from you bugging him so damn much. I can relate."
*A/N I must take a slight break for to hook up my VCR to my mini-tv next to my computer so I can watch Girl, Interuppted. Please hold..................Okay, I'm done, on with the story!
Dib scoffed, "Pa-lease. I think he may be homesick or something!
Gaz glared at Dib for teasing Zim.
"Aww, is that it, Zim? Do you miss your home? Aww, well, too bad!! You're on earth now buddy boy! So get over it!"
Gaz growled and smacked Dib in the head for being so insensitive.
"Zim, is that why you've been moping around all week? Are you homesick?"
Ever since the7th grade, Gaz had started being nice to Zim. She hated to admit it, but she had developed a crush on him.
Zim just rolled over to face the back of the couch. He didn't want to talk to a human.
Dib giggled, "Maybe he misses someone ON his home planet!"
Zim hunched his shoulders as if a chill had gone down his spine.
Dib smiled evilly, "Oh, that's it, is it?"
Still, Zim didn't speak.
"Come on Zim, tell me what's wrong. You need to talk, it'll make you feel better."
Zim rolled over to face Dib and Gaz. "I am perfectly fine!" he shouted.
"Zim, four days ago, you chased a bottle of asprin with a bottle of vodka!" Gaz yelled.
"I had a headache." Zim mumbled.
Dib laughed at the thought of Zim ending his own life, concidering it would save him the trouble.
"That's it, all the humans in the room need to get out. NOW!" Zim shouted as he jumped off the couch and shoved Dib and Gaz toward the door, slamming it behind them. He locked it and fell back on its wooden surface. He sighed.
"I guess I have been moping around alot lately." Gir, who was sitting on the landing of the stairs, growled. He was still mad about Zim trying to kill himself. Zim looked up at him.
He sighed. "I'm sorry for trying to end my existance, Gir."
Gir still frowned at him.
"...and I promise I'll never do it again. Forgive me?"
Gir smiled and ran over to hug Zim.
He giggled as he wrapped his metallic arms around his waist. "I would be sad without you, master! Who would yell at me?"
Zim laughed. "Alright then. Back to my filthy evil I guess..." he sighed as he headed toward his lab to work.
*Not to sound like a JTHM comic or anything, but...MEANWHILE on Irk*
"Kill him?! But why?! Zim has always been so loyal to you! Why would you kill him?" Tak shouted after overhearing the Tallest's disscusion.
"Well, frankly, he's a total disgrace to the Irken race." Purple calmly stated.
Red nodded. "If you're not part of the solution, you'e part of the problem."
Tak, the young Irken female tried to think of any excuse to give the Tallest to make them change their minds.
"We have to give him credit though. If it weren't for his incredible annoyence, we would have never known about earth or its abundance of resources." Red smiled.
"Look Tak, Zim is expendible. We need those resources and if we leave it up to him, we'll never get them."
"Purple is right. If you want something conquered, you have to conquer it yourself."
Tak thought to herself. "I've got to warm him." She took off running down the dark corridor.
"Invader Tak, where are you going?" Purple called after her.
"Oh, uh, just to Food Cortia for some fries, eh heh heh."
*Okay, back to earth...*
"Gir, bring me the...uh...the...thingy."
Gir looked around franticly. "I...I can't find it!!" he screamed.
Zim frowned. "*sigh* Nevermind. I can't concentrate on work right now. I'm going up for a walk. Stay here and uh, do...something."
Gir squealed. "Gaurd the base?"
Zim nodded. "yeah, that."
Gir's eyes glowed a crimson red as he saluted Zim. "Yes my master! I obey!"
Zim sighed as the elevator took him up to the house. When it finally stopped, he stepped out of the toilet only to hear a crash of metal in the front yard. Zim ran to the door, cracked it open and peered out. A twisted pile of of metal resembling a voot crusier lay in ruins in the yard. Zim shrieked in horror.
"Somebody stole the cruiser!" He stopped and thought. Wait, the cruiser's in the repair bay, no one could have gotten to it without my knowledge. What's going on here?"
Zim cocked an eyebrow and studied the cruiser until the cockpit window flipped open. Some clanking noices came from inside the cockpit along with a few Irken curse words. Then, out stepped another Irken, slightly taller than Zim. She wore a blue invader's uniform that matched the color of her eyes perfectly. She stepped out from the pile of metal that once was a cruiser and dusted herself off. Zim couldn't believe his eyes. He blinked and opened the door wider.
"Tak." He whispered.
Tak turned toward the house and saw Zim. "Oh my Tallest! Do you know how long I have been flying around looking for this damn planet? Hmm? Six months!"
Zim laughed a little. "Navigation was never your strong suit. Or piloting from the looks of your crusier."
She smiled and ran over to Zim. "I can't believe it's you! I've missed you so much!"
Zim smiled and embraced her in a hug. "I've missed you too! But, why? Why are you here?"
Tak's smile faded. "We need to talk."