While Kyouya was Away
Description- To relieve Kyouya's stress, the Host Club ships him off to Honolulu during his sleep. A day without Kyouya, Tamaki accepts an offer to allow the Host Club to be filmed for a reality show. The Host Club tells all. Warning: possible ooc-ness
Genre- Humor
Rated T for Suggestive themes, Course language
Reader's guide-
-(CHARACTER NAME(S))-indicates that whoever's name is in the parenthesis is giving a commentary to the camera. This will appear throughout the story, think Reality TV shows.
(When there are two characters in the parenthesis, the first letter of their name will be put before their comment for the sake of flow.)
(E) Indicates the end of the commentary.
… Between paragraphs or dialogue indicates a change in scene or passing of time.
…
Chapter 1-
Host Club under Vigilance
…
The Host club is outside in the field. They have to keep fit, as Tamaki says. They were playing 4 on 3 baseball. Tamaki's team of Haruhi and Kyouya, took the bat for the first round while the twins and the cousins pitched.
"Bet you can't hit a home run," Hikaru and Kaoru challenge.
"Just watch!" Tamaki prepared himself on the plate. Mori pitched a fast ball and Tamaki hit it with all the force he can gather. The ball flew 130 miles per hour in the sky. Tamaki ran from base to base. Before Queen's "We are the Champions" can finish playing in Tamaki's mind, a loud crash sounded throughout the field.
Kyouya twitches.
"That was the Third Music room, wasn't it?" Tamaki rubs the back of his neck sheepishly.
…
The janitors carried away the broken air conditioner in which Tamaki's hit bore a hole through.
"Great we don't have an air conditioner now," Hikaru whispers to Kaoru.
"I know, and he had to pick the summer time to break it too," Kaoru whispers back.
Having amazing ears, he gathered all the sound particles coming out from the twin's mouths. He was in his crouching position, poking at the floor guiltily. Then he looked over at Kyouya who was shaking away his throbbing migraine with each passing second. Money for the damage is coming from the Host Club's budget after all.
…
The next day…
…
Bad news accumulates. Construction of the new race track just finished. An opening ceremony drew in seventy-five percent of the Host Club's customers. The remaining twenty-five percent ran out, unable to stand the heat without the air conditioner.
Tamaki stares out the window and sighs. The racer in the event turned out to be quite an attractive man. That was probably why all their customers left to see him race.
Out of absolute jadedness, the twins flipped through Kyouya's handy-dandy notes.
"Are you sure that's him?" Kaoru's eyes widened a bit.
"Wow, I can't believe that racer guy is the same person who used to collect stamps and go to 'Star Wars' conventions during his spare time…"
…
"Listen everyone, I feel really bad about what happened," Tamaki began. "I feel especially bad for causing so much stress to our dear friend Kyouya. So I was thinking, how about we send him off to Honolulu to relax?"
"Kyou-chan does seem to be getting some white hair," Honey adds apprehensively.
"I heard his dad is pressuring him give up the Host Club too," the twins inform.
"I do remember seeing him carry a pack of Tylenol in his pocket," Haruhi recalls.
"So do we all agree?" Tamaki asks for confirmation. Everyone nods. "Okay, Saturday morning, we all meet up at Kyouya's house at 8 in the morning. He should be deep asleep at that time."
…
Saturday morning…
…
After briefly explaining their plan to Kyouya's dad, he agreed to follow with the plan. Mori carried Kyouya on his back and carefully brought him onto a private jet plane. Just in case, they stuck some ear plugs in his ears.
The group watched the jet plane take off to Hawaii. Tamaki and the twins waved a handkerchief in the air. "Have a safe trip!"
…
Honolulu, Hawaii
…
Kyouya awakens to the Hawaiian sun beating down on his face.
"Where am I?" he props himself on his elbows. Hearing the crimpling of paper, he looks down at his abdomen. There it was, a piece of paper scotch taped to his shirt. He peeled it off and held it in front of his face. At least his glasses were on…
It was a note from Tamaki
Kyouya, you're in Honolulu. You should take a few days off. Don't worry, I have everything under control! (Smiley face)
You don't have to thank us!
-Tamaki
Somehow he can't help worrying.
…
Host Club- Monday
…
Today was a bit better than the other days. At least a few customers came in (although they left a few minutes later).
"Ah…it's so boring!" Hikaru grumbles.
"I wish something new would happen," Kaoru said off the top of his head.
Crashing noises sounded beyond the Third Music Room doors. The Host Club goes out to investigate. On the floor were two students laying stomach down. On the bottom was a skinny, glasses clad boy. On top was a chubby boy with a pony-tail. On his back was a video camera. The two were tangled in cords. The Host Club helped them into the Third Music Room.
"Are you okay?" Tamaki asks, while Hikaru and Kaoru bring them a cup of tea to calm down.
"Yea," the two of them answer, with their hands placed upon their knees, heads looking down. They gave each other brief glances. The one with the glasses nudged the one with the ponytail with his elbow. The one with the pony tail nudges him back.
Before they can go all out on nudging war, Tamaki interrupts. "Is there anything we can do for you?"
The ponytail boy gave the glasses boy one last nudge, and the glasses boy stood up. "My name is Baba Doi—"
The twins burst out laughing. "Baba Doi!? Who in the right mind would name their child Baba Doi?" The twins roll around on the floor.
Baba Doi blushes in embarrassment. He thought he was used to it by now. "This is Uno Ton…"
"Haha, Uno ton?! Was your dad Spanish? Ahaha…One ton's your weight?" Hikaru mocks.
"One ton, hah, that sounds like wonton!" Kaoru laughs.
"Ahem," Tamaki coughs.
"Anyways, we're from the new Television Club—"
"Television club? I've never heard of it," Honey adds.
"You two are the only ones in the television club?" Haruhi asks.
The two of them nods. They didn't come here to be ridiculed… "We just wanted to ask the Host Club if we can film them for a reality TV show…"
"Ahaha, Baba Doi and Uno Ton…" The twins were still at it… "Is your friend 'Ollie Tabooger'?" They were clutching their sides, laughing hysterically.
"I'm so sorry about them, we'll accept." Tamaki assures feeling bad for the humiliated pair. He felt like they came in for help and the Host Club exploited them with mockeries.
"What, are you serious my Lord?" the twins turned serious.
"Would Kyou-chan agree to it…?" Honey looked over to Mori.
"What's the worst that can happen? This is final. We're accepting it," Tamaki ends the discussion.
-(Suoh Tamaki)-
"So, we're supposed to comment on stuff in front of the camera. Well, the Host Club loves to help other people, so I don't mind helping a new club develop. Anyways, do you think my three quarters face looks better on camera or does my profile look better?"(E)
-(Fujioka Haruhi)-
"I don't know what I'm supposed to say here…I have a bad feeling about this though. I don't know what Tamaki-sempai is thinking…"(E)
-(Hitachiin Hikaru, Hitachiin Kaoru)-
K- "The Lord is once again using us to fulfill his empathy."
H- "And so he can indulge in his narcissism."
K,H- "He's a camera whore."(E)
-(Haninozuka Mitsukuni)-
"Tama-chan is really considerate, ne?"(E)
-(Morinozuka Takashi)-
"… (refuses to speak)…"(E)
…
The camera zooms on the newly set up air conditioner.
"Finally, our customers can come back in…" Tamaki places his hands on his hips standing proudly in front of the new air conditioner.
"Ah, it's nice and strong," the twins comment.
"We could have just switched to using a fan, and kept the windows open…it would be better for the ozone…" Haruhi proposes. Tamaki pets her on the head understandingly.
-(Suoh Tamaki)-
"Haruhi is poor. The least we can do is to provide he—him with an air conditioned room, since he probably lacks one in his household…"(E)
The customers began to file in again.
"Princess, I would die if you didn't come again! How I missed you," Tamaki holds the customer's hands, making her blush.
-(Suoh Tamaki)-
"I developed the Host Club to make our female customers happy. I mean every word that I say! Cynically speaking, I probably would die if my customers didn't come back—Kyouya might just kill me. I was the one who broke the air conditioner in the first place…"(E)
"You have something on your face," Haruhi gently wipes off some dirt from her customer's face.
"A-arigatou," the customer blushed getting flustered.
-(Fujioka Haruhi)-
"My involvement in this club was entirely by accident. I broke an $80,000 vase. I'm working off that debt now. I guess it's not so bad. It's pretty interesting hearing these girls talk…"(E)
"Kaoru's so naughty," Hikaru says to the customers.
"I'm not!" Kaoru frowns.
"Remember what happened last night in the showers?" Hikaru brushes his chin with his fingers suggestively.
"Hikaru, I thought we agreed not to mention that again!"
"MOE!! Forbidden brotherly love!" the customers squeal. One customer almost fainted…
-(Hitachiin Hikaru, Hitachiin Kaoru)-
K- "We're not really lying…"
H- "Something did happen in the showers last night…"
K- "Don't say it Hikaru…"
H- "I was taking a shower, and Kaoru came in to pee, but he forgot to flush the toilet."(E)
"Takashi-kun, where's Honey-kun?" the customers ask.
"G'afternoon, I just had my afternoon nap," Honey walked out rubbing his eyes groggily.
"He's so cute!" the customers whisper to each other.
"Ah? Where's Bun-bun-chan?" Honey looks around for his pink bunny, his eyes welling with tears.
"Mitsukuni, here," Mori hands the pink bunny to him.
"Arigatou Takashi!"
"It's so cute!!!!" the customers shriek delightfully.
-(Haninozuka Mitsukuni, Morinozuka Takashi)-
M- "Bun-bun-chan is my favorite. He's cute, ne, Takashi?"
T- "Aa."(E)
-(Baba Doi, Uno Ton)-
D- "I'm the main controller. I do all the editing and stuff like that."
T- "I'm the one that follows the Host Club around and films them."
D- "My first impression? They're a bunch of insensitive fools."
T- "AND they implied that I'm fat!"
D- "You are rather fat…"
T- "… (Glares)…"(E)
…
A/N-
First I want to explain that the names Baba Doi and Uno Ton are generated from a list of Japanese names. It just so happened that these two names are mismatched (by me), and sounds kind of funny (If that's really your name; I'm sorry for offending you).
This is my latest attempt at comedy, and I hope readers will continue to read this story. It is all planned out already. It's a short story of about 6 chapters. The updates shouldn't take long, because my summer vacation is starting after another day.
Once again, a warning: there may be some ooc-ness later on in the story; but it is all for the sake of humor!
Stay tuned for chapter 2- Hitachiins versus Individuality.