Completely cheesy, completely AU one-shot as an early Christmas gift (re: bribe) to those who still care about my other Mad Queen fic(which I haven't forgotten).
He is running fingers through his hair while scanning the room for the second time now. An hour ago, there were at least dozen of single girls and now he can't spot one worth a second glance. It is frustrating, really. He gulps the beer down emptying the bottle. The night is not looking good and it's already past 11. On the bright side, the music is good, the beer is decent and the food is not stale.
He heads to the kitchen which is empty save for a dark-haired girl rummaging through the cupboards. She doesn't notice him as he takes another bottle form the fridge.
"You need help?" he asks, seeing her struggle to reach the top shelf.
She turns to him, wide brown eyes not hiding the surprise. Her hand is still in mid-air when she finally answers, "Um… yes. Oreos." she points to the box.
He reaches easily and adds that winning smile of his.
She mumbles a 'thank you' and is already focusing on the box. He watches her closely, he can't tell if she's buzzed, high or just too into sweets.
After finishing the third cookie, she remembers to offer him one.
"It's fine. You go ahead."
And she doesn't insist. She's not in the mood to be polite. She will finish her cookies and head back. Or just find another solitary corner. And the stranger can do as he wishes, as long as he's not bugging her.
"Rough night?" he asks casually as he leans against the counter.
"I am currently stuffing my face with Oreos." she grumbles, "I'd say I had better."
He laughs heartily. She's kind of cute when she's irritated, not that he knows how she looks when not in foul mood.
"Are you seriously laughing at me right now?!"
"No. I am just laughing 'cause I'm not the only one whose night sucks."
"So a misery loves company kind of thing?"
"Something like that. What's your story?"
She looks up at him and thinks 'why the hell not?', "This year was shitty romance wise, boyfriend turned out to be married and all that. I wanted to skip tonight but being the only sober person my roommate knows, I got goaded into being a designated driver."
"Oh."
"Exactly."
"That's why you're hiding in here?"
"I'm not hiding… just not socializing. What about you?"
"Follow me." he says, heading out for the exit. They don't go far, stopping at the door. He leans against one side, she against the other, "See that blonde over there? Sucking that tattooed guy's face?"
"Yes." she says cautiously.
"That was my New Year's date."
"Oh." she mimics his reaction.
"Exactly."
"He looks dangerous."
"Which is why I do not wish to intervene." and he doesn't want to get into a fight over a girl he met the day before.
"And you look…" she is searching for the right word. He is wearing a light blue shirt, neatly tucked into his pants. And a vest! "Domesticated?"
"Domesticated? It's casual yet it shows I'm a man of good taste."
"I think you picked the wrong crowd."
He nods, keeps nodding mulling things over. Once he finishes the beer he'll probably be too drunk so he'd better asked now while he's only tipsy. His cocky side of personality is not what it used to be. It's quarter to midnight and he has nothing to lose, "I have a proposal."
"A proposal from a perfect stranger? That can only be a good thing." she smirks. Surprisingly she, in a way, trusts he is not a bad guy. Her instincts being what they are, he will probably turn out to be a 21st-century-Norman-Bates kind of guy.
"Perfect strangers being the key. We are both stranded here and will probably never see each other again… So, we share a midnight kiss and that way next year can be better."
"I should kiss you? Your date forgot to dump you. How can you make my romantic life better?"
"Because I believe I was cursed to watch others walk around blissful while I'm… stuck. All of my exes are in happy relationships now. Even Helen is on a roll and we made out only couple of times." he chuckles humorlessly, pointing to the blonde again, "It might help you break the bad stroke."
That's the first time somebody used such line on her. He is original, she'll give him that, "And what do you get?"
"Maybe if I kiss a girl without expecting anything more I'll break this curse."
"Ok, Cupid. One more question. Why me?"
"Honestly? I think you're my best choice."
"And I yours."
They turn towards the room where the party is at its peak. Their choices are slim indeed. Two frat boys way into beer pong to notice anything else and a couple of girls either hammered or not remotely attractive.
"What if your kiss doesn't work on me?"
"Whoa! You're a bigger pessimist than I am… If it doesn't work, you'll get a refund."
"You know what? I don't even think I want to know what that means." she shrugs. There is something about his blue eyes and that puppy look she usually finds pathetic. This guy can pull it off. "Ok, let's do this." she accepts as the crowd stars counting down.
10 , 9, 8…
Suddenly, like they both only now realize what they were talking about, a sort of anxiety comes over them. His palms are sweaty and her heart is beating so loudly she can no longer hear the music.
7, 6, 5…
He cups her cheeks; her hands find rest on his chest.
4, 3, 2…
Their eyes are fully focused on each other's lips. His are plump and surprisingly red. She has a scar on the right. He wonders what the story behind it is.
1!
The clock strikes midnight, she stands up on her toes to catch the kiss. He tilts his head, wrapping arms around her waist.
Her lips are sweet and his salty. The connection lasts for only couple of seconds but it's enough to have them grinning like idiots.
He is the first one to gather his wits, "Happy New Year."
"Happy New Year."
He is swaying on his feet hoping more words would come to him, "This was…"
"I should…" she starts at the same time.
He gestures for her to go first.
"I should go find my friend."
"Yeah." he agrees but she doesn't move. That gives him enough time to do the thing he never planned to, "Aren't you going to get my number?"
She put her confidence mask on, "That defeats the purpose of the perfect strangers, don't you think?"
"I just thought you could let me know how the kiss worked. I have a reputation to uphold."
"If that's the case then…" she hands him the phone and he types down his number.
He leans to see what she will put down under name. He chuckles. "Cupid?"
"I'll change it if it doesn't work." she says way too seductively and flees before she has the chance to embarrass herself more.
It's almost two months later when his phone rings. He's spent three sleepless nights finishing essays so he doesn't even have it in him lift his head from the pillow.
"Hey, Cupid." a vexed female voice says on the other line.
"Wrong number." he mumbles and hangs up. Sleep. He needs sleep.
The phone rings again and he thinks about throwing it across the room, "What?!"
"Is this Cupid?"
"Listen lady." he utters groggily, "I'm not in the mood for jokes. So you better-"
"New Year. Midnight kiss."
He jumps out of the bed. She called! He gave up on her (after spending two weeks trying to find someone who knew her), "Oh… It's you."
"Yes. Your stupid kiss didn't work." she's fuming.
"What happened?" he holds back on reminding her the kiss was quite nice.
"I was on a date." she explains weakly.
He glances at the clock. It's late and he needs to get up at 7 a.m. But something tells him he wouldn't want to miss this, "Want to meet up and tell me all about it?"
There is silence on the other line followed by a soft sigh, "I'm 20 minutes away from the campus."
"How about 'Granny's'? I'll wait there."
"All right." she says and hangs up.
He flings the wardrobe door open hoping to find something decent. He is throwing all the scarves and dirty shirts aside.
His roommate enters and a piece of clothing flies over his head, "You've finally gone mad, Jefferson. Too many books and too little sex can do that to a man."
"Killian! My friend." he grabs him by that stupid necklace of his, "I need something clean that isn't leather."
"Mate… breathe." he steps fully into the room and takes a black and red stripped sweater.
Jefferson wrinkles his nose.
"You'll look like a scarecrow either way."
Jefferson looks at himself in the mirror and realized Killian's right – red rimmed eyes and hair sticking in all directions. And there's no time. He puts the sweater on, grabs the coat and runs out.
He is nursing the cup of hot tea when he spots her. She looks more beautiful than he remembers. Heels, pretty dress, red lipstick - clearly dressed for a date.
Once she recognizes him, she is striding towards him with purpose like he really is to blame. She slides into the booth and orders apple tea, "This one, Keith, is a sexist police academy trainee. He offered to protect and serve… "she looks around the not so empty diner, "Well, you get the picture. You are terrible at your job, Cupid."
He smiles, "Friends usually call me Jefferson."
"Regina Mills."
"It's nice to meet you, Regina."
"Now… about that refund?" she asks hiding a smile behind the rim of the steaming mug.
He sits up straight and places palms on the table, "You could slap me but in the long run that would be the least effective option. Then there is an exchange, a dinner or lunch... And the third option would be to give the magic another chance."
She is looking him in the eyes, her face is unreadable. She is still under impression from her horrible date and slapping a man might help her feel better, "All right, Cupid. I'll take all of them."
He tries to argue but she cuts him off with a single gesture, "I've had three failed attempts at love since your kiss. Therefore, you owe me three refunds. I am a law student; there is no point in arguing."
"As Your Majesty commands."
A bright smile appears on her lips, and he thinks that is the weapon that will take him down.
She chooses option number two first. They agree to have lunch the next day. He learns that she is some kind of American royalty. Her mother is a big shot in the Republican party (which Regina loathes). She learns he is quite the artist. One lunch turns into two, three, four then dinner. They spend nights studying together. They meet each others friends. But it doesn't mean that they are dating. After her friend's housewarming party, Regina tells him it's time for refund number three. To her utter amusement, it takes him a moment too long to realize what she's asking. Again, they do not admit to dating – it just takes more time for his Cupid magic to work.
The first time he spends night at her place, it freaks them both out. Because they are definitively NOT dating (despite what everyone claims). To prove a point, he asks out a cute girl he met in history class. He tells Regina and she slaps him so hard it rings in his ear for hours.
"Last refund." she says.
Jefferson grabs her and smiles. As expected, it infuriates her, "Good. Now I can ask you out."
She slaps him again, playfully this time, "Hm... I guess that kiss worked after all."