BASED ON A SERIES OF TRUE EVENTS (SERIOUSLY)

What happens when Renesmee has her first candy bar? Well, this is what happens!

Bpov

Edward and I walked to the house to get Renesmee. We wanted to get her to their cottage before it was her bedtime. Jacob had been watching Renesmee today. When we were almost to the door Jacob ran out to meet us. A feeling of worry suddenly washed over me, and I could feel Edward go rigid beside me.

"What's wrong with you? Did something happen to Renesmee?" I demanded.

He paused before answering, "Well, she's not hurt. Now don't get mad!"

He didn't even have time to explain what had happened. In less than a second, we were through the front door. As we entered the living room, nothing could have prepared us for what we saw.

Bouncing on the sofa was none other than Renesmee. She stopped and quickly turned around. I let out a sigh of relief when I realized that she smiling, but there was some sort of brown muck smeared across her face and her hands. She was holding a wrapper of sorts. Apparently she had gotten candy from someone. Renesmee started to laugh uncontrollably.

"Yay, Mommy and Daddy are here." She screamed excitedly, "Can I stay up all night because that would be so much fun." She finally had to take a breath. "Did I mention that chocolate is the most amazing thing in the world"

Edward was the first to speak, "Just how much have you had?"

"Not that much!" She said quickly.

She started jumping up and down at an incredible speed. Jacob walked forward. "It really isn't that bad." He said in a quiet voice.

I turned around slowly, "Isn't……..that………BAD!!" I glared at him. Renesmee gasped!

"Canwegetaflyingmonkey! Ithinkthatflyingmonkeysareawesome. OMG!" She suddenly started to cry, "Why can't people live off of candy." Tears started to run down her face. All of a sudden her face got really angry. Then she started to laugh. "Bunnies have really really really really long ears. Yeah, rocks are hard" She yawned.

"I think she is getting tired." I whispered.

"Mahahahahahahaha!! I shall rule the world." She started to slur her words. "Mictory is vine. No wait. Victory is a dime." She closed her eyes and started to snore.

All three of us stared at her. Jacob coughed. "Wow! You know all I gave her was ONE chocolate bar."