(I still don't get why Chellebelle gave crazy me the permission to borrow her format... whatever! Ladies and gentlemen, The X men present Snow White and Rose Red!)

A poor woman named Ororo lived in a cottage in the woods. The woman had taken in two children, one who's name was Anna White, and the other who's name was Wanda Red.


Rogue rolled her eyes. "Again with me being one of the main characters?" She said. Wanda looked at Rogue. "Hey, for once, Kitty wasn't matched up to be your sister." She pointed out. Rogue blinked in surprise. "That... actually works in my opinion. Where is Kitty, anyway?"

She went for a soda with Piotr last time after 'the Boy who cried Wolf 'and I think they are out at a movie right now.

Ororo smiled. "I like him better than the previous boy she used to date. Piotr is a bit more of a gentlemen."

I know, right?


They were the two of the best children that had ever lived, although they still were extremely different. Wanda liked to be outside and with nature, and had nicknamed herself the Scarlet Witch. Anna would prefer being indoors with her adopted mother and help clean around the house, and would read in her spare time.

Nevertheless, the two children loved each other and pledged to always stay together. If Wanda wanted to play outside, Anna would join her. And if Anna wanted to read, sometimes Wanda would read, though normally she just practices hexing things out the window.

They promised never to leave each other, and Ororo helped them keep that promise. They constantly went outside and gathered berries. The wild animals never hurt them.


Rogue raised her eyebrows. "What does them 'being nice' have anything to do with the animals not hurting them?" Wanda shrugged. "Hey, Ororo's the weather witch, and I'm just a witch. They probably like us because of that fact."

Guys, quit analyzing the story too much, it irritates me to no end when people do that...


During the winter, Ororo would tell her daughter Rogue, "Go bolt the door," and she would. Then they all sat by the hearth and Ororo would tell them stories.

One frozen winter night, while Ororo was telling them of a man that she once knew, someone knocked on the door. "Go, Wanda, and open the door. Someone must be cold." Ororo told her daughter, and Wanda ran over and opened it, expecting to see a man.

What she saw was a giant black bear with red on black eyes. Wanda, not expecting this, screamed and leaped away and Rogue hid behind her mother. The bear said, "Don't be alarmed, I just want to warm up for a couple minutes."


"What I'd be alarmed about is the fact that the bear talks." Rogue remarked, then groaned. "Oh no, red on black eyes... Odd One!" She glared at the director.

And you weren't expecting that?

"But he's a freaking BEAR." Rogue said. "How the heck does that work?" "You... haven't heard this story, have you?" Wanda said, trying not to laugh too hard. "No." Rogue said.


"You poor bear, come in." Ororo said, and the bear shuffled in. "Take care that you do not burn your fur." Ororo said. Then she glanced at her daughters. "Do not worry, this bear means us no harm. You can come out." Wanda and Anna walked out shyly.

They made quick friends with the bear, who said his name was Gambit. They soon learned how to play tricks on him, like placing their feet on his back, pulling his fur (gently), or poking him with a hazel rod. Gambit thought this was hilarious and if they played a bit too rough he would warn them off, saying, "Little Rogue and Little Scarlet Witch, you will strike your lover dead!"


"Hello, Chere." Rogue glared at Remy. "Back off, swamp rat." She said. Remy shrugged. "I like this story already though." "Me too!" John leaped over the director's chair, scaring her half to death.

Oi! John, you are not on until the end. You are too dang early!

"Sorry..." He said. Wanda raised her eyebrows. "You're... Pyro, right?" She said slowly. Pyro grinned and nodded at Wanda. "Yup!" Then Wanda groaned and face palmed. "I already know his part, don't I?"

Yes. Yes you do.


When bedtime came, Gambit slept next to the fireplace and left the next morning when Anna let him out.

They did this every day for the rest of winter, and they all became extremely close to the bear, but especially Anna. When spring finally came, he said to Anna White, "Now I must go away, and will not come back for the rest of the summer." Anna didn't like this and said, "Why, my dear bear?"


"You called Remy your dear." John said, snickering. Wanda rolled her eyes and smacked the Australian over the head. "Ow!" He complained. "What was that for, Sheila?" Wanda glared. "One, don't call me Sheila. Two, don't scare Rogue away from Remy, she's in denial enough." "I can hear you two you know!"


"I have to defend my treasures from the evil dwarfs, Anna." Anna was extremely sad to see him go, and as she unbolted the door for him, the hook caught some of his fur and pulled it off. For a split second, Anna could've sworn that she saw gold in his fur, but he galloped away and disappeared quickly among the trees.

After some time, Ororo sent the children out to gather... uh...


(Okay, quick question: What does a faggot mean? I know that it usually is a derogatory term for a homosexual... but that isn't the context here... tell me in the reviews. Oh gosh I feel blonde…)


Ororo sent them to gather flowers. They went out and found, by a fallen tree, a dwarf with webbed fingers was jumping up and down.


Todd jumped up and down. "Heck ya, I'm in the parody!" Then he saw Wanda. "Babycakes!" He said excitedly, jumping her. "Eep! Get him off me!" She yelped. John grabbed one of his lighters and shot a flame at Todd.

"Youch!" Todd yelped, grabbing his behind.

Todd. Chill. Bobby, ice him real quick. Pyro, stop setting people on fire.

Pyro pouted. "Aww…"


"Is something wrong, dwarf?" Anna asked. The dwarf, whose name was Mortimer, glared at them with ruby red eyes. "Of course there is something wrong, little idiots! I caught my beard in this log, and I can't get free. Stop laughing and help me out!"

Anna and Wanda were not laughing, and they tried their best to free his beard, but didn't succeed. "I'll go get somebody!" Wanda said, wanting to be free of the little man's creepy leer. "Don't do that! There's two too many right now!" Mortimer said. "Oh take a chill pill. I thought of something." Anna said, and, finding a small pair of scissors in her pack, cut free his beard.


"Mortimer?" The cast said, confused.

Its his original name in the comics. Todd doesn't seem... fitting for this part.

Todd glared. "I don't like it." He grumbled.

Don't make me give Pyro back his lighter.


As soon as the dwarf was free, he grabbed a bag full of gold that was hidden between the roots of the log. "Stupid humans! You cut my gorgeous beard! May evil reward you!" He yelled, then took off. "Ass." Wanda grumbled.


Wanda. In the story, they did not COMMENT on the dwarf's rude behavior.

"I bet in the story they didn't have the dwarf checking out Rose Red either!" Wanda said back to the director.

Good point. I'll let it slide this time.


Later, the two went out to catch some fish. When they arrived at the stream, they saw the ungrateful dwarf, hopping about. "Where you going? Are you trying to get in the water?" Wanda called out to him."I'm not that dumb! Can't you see the fish trying to pull me in!" Mortimer yelled.

It turns out that Mortimer had gone fishing, and his beard had tangled with the line. Just afterwards, a fish bit and Mortimer had to go any which way the fish pulled.

The two decided (Though Wanda protested) to help the dwarf out again, and when they got to him, they tried untangling the line, but it was too intertwined with Mortimer's beard. Not having scissors with them this time, Wanda just hexed his beard and it completely fell off.


"Aw man, I never grow facial hair in real life." Todd said, grumbling. Wanda smirked and said, "What did you do, glue the beard on?" Todd shook his head. "No of course not... I taped it on." The cast started snickering loudly.


Mortimer stamped his foot and grabbed a bag of pearls that he had set down earlier. "You fools! I dare not show my face among my own people now!" He yelled, then took off.

"Next time, can't we just leave him?" Wanda pleaded. Anna shook her head. "No. It wouldn't be right. Although, it would be awfully tempting..."

A while later, their adopted mother sent them to town to pick up a couple things. On the way, they saw a giant bird of prey. Slowly, the bird circled around and around, then she dove. A loud screech was heard, and the bird was seen dragging the rude dwarf away.

Wanda hexed the eagle, and the eagle dropped Mortimer to the ground. "You idiots! You tore my coat!" Mortimer yelled, then grabbed a bag of precious gems that he had and ran off.

By now, the girls were used to Mortimer's rudeness, and just headed onto town and got their things. On the way back, they saw the dwarf. Thinking he was alone, he had shaken his bag of gems onto the ground. There were many beautiful colors, so the girls just stood and admired them.

When Mortimer saw then, he yelled, "What are you doing?"


"Question. Where did he get the jewels? He's just a dwarf." Ororo asked.

I think it is explained where he got the rich stuffs later.

"Maybe he's a miner, like the ones in Snow White!" John said, then he belted out, "Hi ho!"

Oh gosh...


The dwarf continued on yelling at them and scolding the poor girls, when all of a sudden, a great roar was heard and a black bear charged through the woods.

Mortimer became terrified, and started begging and pleading, saying, "Oh bear, please don't eat me! Here, take my jewels, that'll work! Or, eat those two nasty mutant children over there, they are as fat as quails! I beg you, eat them instead!"


Todd laughed nervously as a blue hex bolt crackled around Wanda's hand and Rogue removed one of her gloves. "Yo, I'm just acting, guys..." He said, swallowing nervously. Rogue scowled and said, "I don't care."

You can kill him after the parody is done. We still need him...


The bear didn't even answer and with one mighty smack of his paw, killed the evil dwarf.


"Hallelujah!" Wanda yelled. Everyone slowly backed away from Wanda as she danced excitedly.

Wanda... girl, you scare me.


The girls began to run away, then the bear called out, "Anna White and Wanda Red, it's just me. Don't be scared, wait, and I will escort you." Recognizing the voice of Gambit, they stopped and waited. When the bear trotted up to them, he surprised them by standing up and turning into a handsome young man dressed in all gold.

"I am a king's son, my real name is Remy." He said. "I was changed to a bear by that wicked dwarf and he stole all my riches. I was doomed to wander the forest as a wild creature until I should be freed by his death. He got what he deserved."


"Dude, I knew magic?" Todd said. "Knew being the operative word there. And now I get where he got the precious gems." Ororo said, then glanced at John, still singing the one dwarf song.

John, it's your scene next. You're on for twenty seconds only, then we can cut.

"Okay! Just one more thing."

Shoot.

"Hi ho, Hi ho! It's home from work we go!" Pyro tried whistling but his voice was slightly too dry, so he hummed instead.


Oi...

They all went back to Ororo's cottage and Anna was married to the prince, and the prince arranged a marriage between his friend St. John and Wanda. They divided the treasures that the dwarf had. Ororo ended up marrying a woodsman that lived near the city. Then they all went to live in the palace, and Ororo planted two rose bushes in front, one red and one white.

THE END!

"I just realized something. The way it seemed, Rogue and Wanda were kids... but they got married!" John said, extremely disturbed. "I'm assuming the woodsman is Logan, right?" Rogue asked.

John, I never thought of it like that. And Rogue, you are correct. I'm a horrendous Logan/Ororo shipper.

"Wait, the play is over now..." Rogue said, removing her glove. Wanda's hands began crackling with blue electricity. "No!" Todd yelled, and leaped for the door, the two angry girls following behind.

Remy laughed and said, "That's my chere." John stared dreamily after Wanda. "And I think I just found my Sheila..." He said.

And that's it people! Remember to review, and go see Chellerbelle's X men present. Bye byes!