A/N - a piece for Hermione's Harmonys challenge - "Miserable Melody" where you had to choose your character and the song you wanted to use as inspiration. I chose Remus Lupin and the song Broken - Leona Lewis.
Disclaimer - I don't own Harry Potter, or Leona Lewis's Broken. pwease don't sue me..
My last hope died at the exact same moment you did. The one thing that kept me alive was my love for you. It has been five years since that day. I don't know how I've lasted, sure have had people help me through it, but the day you... died... a piece of me died along with you...
Remus bent forward in his chair, hiding his face as he felt tears pricking at his eyes. He didn't know why it was so hard now. He was surrounded by his friends daily, but the memories of being told about Sirius' death broke all the strength he had carefully built up in preparation. Wiping his eyes he sat back up, taking a deep breath and continuing with what he was writing.
The shattered pieces of my heart slowly heal over time, only to be broken once more when I see a picture of you in a photo album. I'm torn Pad. I didn't think I'd have fallen so hard until I realised you had gone.
Why couldn't it have been me?
Why did you have to die?
Am I not allowed to be happy Pad?
Has this curse that has been the bane of my life since I was a child rendered me incapable of keeping someone I love around?
I want to run Pad. I want to be in your arms. Give you everything I can and much more. Is that too much to ask anyone?
Remus pushed himself away from the desk, stumbling over his feet as tears blurred his vision. He collapsed against the floor of the bathroom just as the wave of nausea washed over him, emptying his stomach contents into the once clean bowl. Salty tears mixing with beads of sweat as he knelt there, clutching at his middle as he dry heaved.
"C...come back to me..." he whispered hoarsely into the still silence of the room, listening to it echoing back to him. Resting his head on the rim of the toilet, Remus let the rest of the tears fall.
Someone save me...
His head swam with broken dreams focusing on Sirius' smile. It always brightened the room, and sent butterflies through Remus' body. It was one of those smiles that you couldn't help but match. Remus sniffed and tried to force a smile at the thought of his once lover. Moving from the cold floor, he clutched to the sink and looked at his reflection in the mirror.
Why did you love me Pad?
Remus growled low in his throat, curling his hands into fists and smashing them into the mirror. Letting the sound of the glass falling onto the tiled floor, he inspected his hand and pulled out the slivers that were stuck there. He let out a heartbreaking howl into the bathroom, collapsing onto the floor and curling up into a tight ball.
I need you.
I want you here.
I miss you and your laugh.
Come back to me...
I love you.