Things Left Unsaid
Rating: PG
Characters/Pairings: Cam/Booth; implied Booth/Brennan
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters from Bones.
Description: Booth visits Cam the night before her wedding.
Notes: I am so completely enamored of this couple. I know, I know...it's Booth and Brennan, blah blah blah... There's just something about Cam and Booth that I adore. I had intended for this to be a one-shot, but as is the case with most of my stories, it will be a multi-parter.
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"If you fly away tonight, I want to tell you that I love you..."
Things Left Unsaid, Disciple -
"Seeley Booth, do you have any idea what time it is?"
Cam sounded annoyed when she found me on the front steps of her house. It was late, almost two in the morning, and she had no doubt been sleeping before my phone call informing her I was outside. I turned around to see her standing against the doorjamb, plushy pink bathrobe pulled tightly across her body, sleep evident on her face, but her eyes were clear.
Oh, those eyes. Dark and majestic, able to carry and convey such emotion. Sometimes, the only real clue that she was feeling anything. Cam, having been a cop, was incredibly adept at hiding her feelings – most of the time. I think I'm one of the few people on the planet who can read her like a book.
She shivered slightly, pulling the robe just a bit tighter. I, too, felt a sudden chill, but not from the unseasonably chilly night in the middle of August, but from the sight of her.
She was beautiful. She is beautiful and always had been. I suddenly wondered if I'd told her that enough.
"Yeah," I answered her questions sheepishly, casting my eyes away briefly before they inevitably landed on her face again. "yeah, sorry," I continued with a shake of my head. "I just..." I couldn't find the words. Honestly, I wasn't sure there are words for what I'm feeling right now. It's somewhere between love, admiration, regret and acceptance. I don't think there is one word to describe all of that.
I looked up into her face again and I could see the concern she didn't bother to hide. She stepped further outside, sure that I didn't want to come in and wake up her visiting family, pulling the door closed softly. She sat down on the first step and looked up at me expectantly.
"What's going on, Seeley?" she asked in that casual, yet concerned way. Her dark hair fell back off her shoulders and I was confronted with the images of that happening the many times she and I made love.
Had I told her what I had to say then? What I intended to say now with the clearest sincerity? I wasn't sure.
I sat down beside her, and immediately her hand sought out mine. There was a time when I would have pulled away. A time not so long ago that I wouldn't have even been here this late and at this particular time but something deep inside compelled me, pushing me forward until I was powerless to resist.
I squeezed her hand tightly in mine. I could feel the worry coming from her in waves but she didn't press. No, Cam understood me. She understood that I needed time.
"I don't want you to take this the wrong way," I began quietly. I glanced at her and saw her looking at me intensely. After a moment she nodded, and I continued. "I honestly don't know why I'm here right now; I guess..." I looked up at her, smiled as warmly as I could, and resisted the urge to caress her cheek. "I guess I just wanted one more night with Cam Saroyan," I told her. "Just a few minutes with my Cam..." Her eyebrow hitched at the possessive word, but she remained quiet. "to say the things I need to say."
It took a moment, but she nodded again. I can tell that it took her a while to gauge what I meant, reconciling the last conversation we had together where I accused her of being jealous of Bones to the moment at hand, but ultimately, she would just allow me to say whatever it was that I needed to say.
"Okay," Cam said finally. "What do you have to say?" There was a hint of amusement in her voice, and excitement at things unknown that was always there. I loved that about her. I wonder have I ever told her that.
"Okay, again, don't take this the wrong way either but..." I made sure I was looking deeply into her eyes for this part. Made sure she was able to see the truth of it in my eyes. "I love you, Cam."
The silence that overtook us shook me to my core. I'm a tough guy but when you tell a woman that you love them and they sit there silently, it tends to scare you.
"I..." I stammered. She dropped her hand from mine. "Did you hear me?" I wondered.
"Yes, I heard you," her voice was as cool as the night chill. She turned her head away and stared straight ahead.
My mouth opened and closed at least three times before any words came out. I could feel my heart thundering in my chest and the blood rushing through my veins.
"I just..."
"What the hell is wrong with you?" she asked me, interrupting what I was going to say next.
"What?" I asked stupidly.
"What the hell is wrong with you?" Cam repeated slowly, her eyes glaring at me. "What in the world made you think it was alright for you to come over to my house the night before my wedding and tell me that you love me? Especially, after you told me that I was jealous of you and your new girlfriend?" She rose from the step but didn't make a move to go back inside the house. She crossed her arms over her chest defensively. "I know I just asked you this but, what the hell is wrong with you?"
I sat there on her front steps gaping up at her. Closing my eyes, I sighed heavily. This isn't the way I wanted it to go at all.